An author who's stories may not be good but at least he tries...
Everyone knows how the mane six got their cutie marks, but what would happen if Fluttershy was the smart one, Twilight was the shy one, Rainbow was the fashionista, Rarity was the cocky and loyal one, Applejack was the party mare and Pinkie was the farmer?
The world would be so different...
(this story will put you in Dr. Flora's mind as she goes about her day.)
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This is an interesting concept and I think it deserves more than just a single chapter.
Interesting.
But more importantly, what if it was admitted that Pinkie Pie is the smart one?
I like the concept, you did a nice job with the characters, and the story is nice, but i think it’s a little rushed.
you jumped in from introducing one character after another before bolting to the next. the only thing that seemed to get me through the story without being confused is that i know the mane 6 and often wondered what their personalities would be like swapped. you left a lot up to my imagination and it was a little sloppy.
Now i’m not attacking you for writing a story. it was a good story regardless, but i think you could do better and maybe pace yourself a bit. spend more time on character development, introduce us to the characters one at a time, maybe over the course of several chapters as they attempt to help Dr. Flora but their personalities end up making it impossible, it adds to the story and may net you more reads and thumbs ups. that’s just my opinion.
and have a thumbs up from me. it was a nice read, i just wish it was a little longer.
8554742
I don't do character development too well..., So I leave it out,it'll be nearly impossible for me to that sort of thing,and even if I do people will still dislike it,it's just how it goes.
Ps: and I wanted to get this done before my last story of the year which I call The Grand Finale which will be my best story yet!😊
8554941
I get it, you write how you want and hope for the best.
Keep it up and i’m looking forward to the next one.
8555253
Remember when I said that the story The Grand Finale would be my best story yet...
Well here it is https://www.fimfiction.net/story/391798/the-grand-finale