When Spike is kidnapped by a gang of pirates, Twilight and her cavalcade of crazy characters venture the high seas in search of him.
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- Member Since 11th Jul, 2012
- offline last seen 1 hour ago
Lucky Seven
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Lucky Seven
Joined 11th Jul, 2012 ·
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Pirates, adventure, comedy and Spike? You sir, are a genius.
This is giving me some Shanghai'd! vibes.
8291834
Hopefully Discord doesn't drop Trixie into the... Fly of Despair.
There is literally no piece of fiction in existence which would not be improved with the addition of pirates. Heck, even some periods of actual history seriously want for a good pirate adventure.
Now that the SomethingEmoAndEdgy goose can lay no more golden eggs (rest in peace you mysterious, tortured genius), there is little on FiMFic I'm more excited for than the next chapter of this.
*pirate noises intensify*
8291838
...
I can only smile because I haven't actually read any of Shanghai'd.
I did just read Roseluck's Realization, though.
You asked for a comment. Oh dude, you're getting it.
There's plenty of potential already. You've got a good line of characters, all of whom have some sort of connection and relationship—and they're all fairly snarky and all, so there will be many snark fests to be held. And the exchanged dialogue already shows you're doing well in that department already.
I found it super funny how Starlight knew to slowly interest Trixie into joining the mission. It doesn't surprise me that she can be somewhat manipulative—you know, for good reasons! And god, I can see Discord trying to say 'bro.' He's already said 'besties' in an episode (I cringed) so that's nothing new, but it's also a nice connection to that one episode where he and Spike became friends (still haven't seen that >.<).
I will mention drawing caution to the fact that Discord is on this team. AKA in issue that can be questioned in many stories where he's featured because he's an OP as hell dude. Since you have Discord, you really don't need anyone else in this rescue mission. This doesn't need to be addressed because hey, it's fanfiction, who cares? Still, I can't help but bring it up, and as long as he isn't wasted potential, it should be fine.
Also, I do hope they spared a letter for the girls when they get home. I am actually pretty cool for the circumstances that they can't join—they can't get them now, for example, because time restraints—but if Rarity figured out, oh boy!
ALSO also, I'm gonna bitch about the letter, bud. While I get what you were going for, got to be honest, no one ever really writes like that. You can absolutely write in grammatical errors or messy sentence structures to piss her off, but adding accents feels off. I know why you did it, but it's also the stream of logic many people have when putting too much emphasis on accents when writing dialogue for a character like Applejack.
Otherwise, good so far, dude!
Twilight, Starlight, Trixie and Discord team up to find and free Spike from pirates?
I am interested!
Does this take place before Trixie, Starlight, and Discord help Thorax become king? Because Trixie acts like she barely knows Discord at all. She calls him a weird snake thingy instead of by his name, or by his "clutzy" nickname.
Also, why not ask King Thorax for help? Or ask Celestia/Luna/Cadance for the bits? Or Ember?
How did a crew of pirates manage to kidnap Spike while he was sleeping in the castle and make it all the way to Las Pegasus in less than a day? (Then again, the Changelings kidnapped the princesses, Shining, Spike, and the Main 6 in just a day or two from their castles without hardly anyone aside from Sunburst noticing, so...)
Heh, nice that Spike likes Trixie's magic shows, though.
Here's more Alestorm, because there's no such thing as too much Alestorm.
This was pretty fun, and I look forward to pirate shenanigans to come.
Off to a pretty good start. Can't wait to see their antics on the high seas!
There better be wenches, plunder, ridiculous consumption of rum and a nonsensical reference to Jake and the Neverland Pirates.
Its really good keep up the good work
8291838
I'm more scared of the Perfume Department personally.
Can't discord just teleport them there?
8293120
He could, but Discord has more sense for adventure than that!
Oh, I can tell. This is going to be fun.
I just bought another one of their CD's a few days ago! I seem to be missing one or two of them, because in the second Leviathan-related song he makes mention of defeating ninjas, but none of their songs that I've heard included ninjas.
Man this looks like fun. The only thing that would make it better is if Twilight's horn were actually stolen by goblins.
8291842 Agreed. The only thing better in a story than regular pirates are sky pirates, and the only thing better than them are space pirates.
please somehow allow 'yarg' to be said at least once, love that word
Like I love pirate stories.
I feel like Pipsqueak would love a pirate adventure.
I wonder if Celestia and Luna are aware of their little gem Spike was kidnapped by pirates?
New pirate's first rule: Never put a fire breathing dragon on your wooden boat.
I desperately hope there won't be a severe lack of saucy wenches and cheesy yoho-ing.
This feels really lazy. Twilight is an Alicorn princess but doesn't even consider calling on the guard to deal with this? At least PRETEND to have an excuse for the pirate misfits adventure instead of something reasonable.
8295437
Why would she let guards have all the fun. When villians attacked, Celestia didnt call her guards to go deal with them in the actual show.
8295437
I understand your point of view, but at the same time, a plot has to have an element of fun to it. It'd be like complaining about why Spike isn't in every adventure or scene involving the Castle. He lives there, but his presence isn't always critical to the telling of the story.
8295453
Or asking why Discord didn't just snap his talons and solve everything in the season 4 premiere. That would have deprived everyone of a valuable, fun adventure, as well as a lesson in friendship.
8295453
She concludes that they should fight them, but calling in the actual fighters is too obvious for a kidnapping to just ignore in a text format without at least a JOKE reason.
Honestly the writing thus far was bland, and I feel the story is coasting on the crowd-pleasing topic and great cover image, though in fairness the adventure hasn't started yet.
8295466
You definitely have a right to whatever opinion you choose. I'm just saying you should definitely give it a chance once the adventure starts, because that's where things kick into gear, I would imagine. Either way, it's very kind of you to explain your distaste as opposed to just dropping a downvote and saying "you suck", lol.
with those tags, characters, and pirates, i vibrated with excitement.
do i sense wacky hi-jinks with spikes actual kidnapping in the back round, maybe cut a ways showing him doing humiliating pirate things, and the meat and potatoes their vacation?
im interested in how you're going to handle discord. remember, he's got a scheduled tea time with fluttershy. i don't think he'd miss that.
also, with "sunset" in the title, any change of bacon horse showing up?
Any chance of the rest of the Main 6 finding out because it's unlike Twilight to have an adventure without them by her side
Also, I hope this story continues
9361221
Some time soon, I'll continue it c:
And I do have plans for other characters, but life has gotten in the way of writing lately.
9361894
Totally understandable. updates to my own story have been slow as my job is getting more and more hectic
Eagerly awaiting a chapter
9361894
Sometime soon, eh?
10196341
Welcome to my timeline, where the years seem to just meld together.
By sometime soon, where you referring to years? It’s already 2020.
10388149
Sorry, had a lot of personal stuff going on in my life and I haven't had much time to write.
10388612
Oh. Well, I’m excitedly waiting for the next chapter
Nice to see this story not canceled
ITS ALIVE!!!
I lost it at this line.
This is comical gold!
Please keep going!
He should cook them. I hear that's a pretty thorough way to de-leech onself.