Pretty good, didn't notice any writing errors in it. Ohhh, I'm so excited for the next chapter, this story is pretty good for now. Great story Aliss.

can i add a story to this zombie arc serires if its ok

7636703 a zombie arc series?

7636743 well you just started a zombie apocolypse which is good but it would be a shame to just end it and not explore the new world you made dont you think

7636763 I mean. I do plan on continuing it, but zombie fics are hard to make a series. At the most, ill do it from the point of view of Luna and Celestia.

7637674 i know people sepcilaize with certin characters in these things but diffrent people can contribute to the new world type with diffrent characters

NO!!! Are you done, this was probably my favorite fanfic at the moment, besides like 1, are you giving up on this?

7641136 Not entirely. I'm planning on writing a story from each of the princess's point of view. One for Cadence and one for Luna and Celestia.

As for this set story, yes. I literally have no ideas on how to continue it

7641418 alright, well I'll look out for the princess's storyline

Unlike what Undead Equestria Writer said, I did find a few things wrong with this chapter.

Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Twilight, and Scootaloo ran past Rarity’s boutique. There was no need to go there anymore.

"There was no need to go there anymore."

i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/210/119/9b3.png

Of course there was no need to go there anymore! No need to say it.

Another thing that grabbed me was this next line:

They had passed Sweetie Belle’s corpse not even a block away, nearly half her body had been mutilated and eaten.

You should have expanded a little more on that. Maybe have RD or Twilight say something about that, or you could have had Scootaloo rush over to Sweetie Bell. You know, have her weep over her fallen friend? I understand they were being chased, but in my honest opinion, that would have been a great touch.

Now here comes the good news...

*Drum Roll*

I am going to add this story to my good list!

Here is why:

“I’m going to kill them all..” Rainbow Dash said, her voice full of anguish and hatred. “I'm going to FUCKING KILL THEM ALL!” she screamed profanities and curses at the wandering undead for a solid minute before Twilight interfered.

That line, and RD kicking zombie ass, won me over. It was not perfect execution, pretty much all tell and no show, but it was the proper reaction for Rainbow to have! P.S. Get rid of the line in the above quote that I strike through. There is no need to come out and say that her voice was full of anguish and hatred. Rainbow yelling that she will kill them all is crystal clear on what her voice was full of.

One more thing before I end this chapter review:

Instead of using CAPS, use italics. It looks much more professional.

I look forward to other works by you, Aliss.

7641945 7670924 I know it's been a while but im actually almost done with the Celestia and Luna story. Once it's done and I get an editor ill be all set :P

8025505 I'm still waiting...

8026753 The story is on FimFiction, just not public. Just got an editor so it may be done soon

8029477 alright... still waiting

8029477
We have found this.
We begin to read.

8047704 Yea,after reading the story over I definitely see what you mean. However I will redo this story sometime in the future.

8047709 My bad, I meant the beginning

Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Twilight, and Scootaloo ran past Rarity’s boutique.

Can't all of them fly? And just have Scoots get on Rainbow's back.

Otherwise, pretty good. I enjoyed it.