• Published 15th Jun 2012
  • 8,087 Views, 285 Comments

Red Vs Blue: Epsilon in Equestria - The Sentient Cloud



When Church is sucked back into the Epsilon Unit, he finds himself in a world filled with ponies.

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Intermission: Plans For The Day

The UNSC Archives:

Carolina’s gun swung around in an arc, spraying a steady stream of bullets into the room.

Two men dropped to the ground instantly, their visors shattered by the onslaught of bullets.

“Oh fuck!” Grif shouted as the bullet-storm flying above his head doubled in intensity, before stopping abruptly.
Slowly, he removed his hands from his head – despite the fact that they weren’t blocking any of the loud racket anyway – and got up from behind the crate.

Carolina was standing in the middle of the room, holding an assault riffle in each hand, looking at the collection of UNSC soldiers in the room – all of which were dead.

“Woah.” Grif picked up the Epsilon Unit, and whistled. “Holy Crap. How did you do that?”

Carolina turned to him, but didn’t say anything. The angry glare that was her visor conveyed the message well enough.

“Right.” Grif cringed away slightly, shifting the Epsilon Unit in front of his crotch. “Sorry.”
“Just get the unit.”

***

Ponyville Library:

Twilight sat at the table, gazing blankly at the wall as her coffee slowly cooled down.
She whistled absently. For the most part, she was waiting for Church to wake up.

Today was ‘the day’. She was going to be nice and tolerant. She was going to bear everything Church did with a smile and a good attitude, and if that didn’t make him more receptive, then nothing would.

She whistled absently. How long could that stallion sleep in? Did alcohol have an effect on sleep patterns? She’d never been in a position to find out.

Spike waved a hand in front of Twilight’s face, jolting her from her reverie.
“Twilight, you okay?”

“Huh?” Twilight shook her head. “Yeah, why?”
“You were kinda… just staring off into space.” Spike raised an eyebrow. “Everything alright?”

“Just thinking.” Twilight replied with a grin. If she was going to be nice today, then why not be nice to everyone?

“Uhh… huh…” Spike frowned. “You didn’t add anything to that coffee, did you?”
“No Spike.” Twilight pursed her lips. “I’m just going to try and be extra nice today, and see if I can’t make a breakthrough with Church!”

“Righ…” Spike lifted up his feather-duster once again. “Good luck with that. I’ve got actual stuff to do.

***

The UNSC Archives:

“Come on!” Carolina barked. “Move it!”
“I’m moving, I’m moving!” Grif complained, Slowly jogging behind the Cyan soldier. “Damn!”
“I said, hurry up!” The Freelancer snapped. “Before more of them arrive!”

Come on, Grif.” Simmons’ voice crackled over the radio. “The sooner you get out here, the sooner you can have some Oreos.

Grif didn’t acknowledge the comment, but he did manage to speed up a little bit. “Can’t believe I’m always the one that has to go through this crap.”
I’m sure Church is working just as hard to get out again.” Simmons assured him.

***

Pain.
Pain.
A lot of pain.

“Oh my god…” Church brought his hoof up to his head – which only served to cause more pain on contact. "Ow! Bitch!"

He rolled over in his bed, letting out a hoarse groan to match the springs in the mattress.
“Fuuuuuuuck…” The curse erupted from his lips. “Holy shit. Soooo… muuuuch… beeeeeeer…”

***

"Yeah." Panted Grif as he desperately tried to keep pace with Carolina. "I guess."
"Come on." Carolina repeated, now with slightly less bite to her voice. "We're nearly there."

"God you're pathetic." She muttered under her breath.

Comments ( 42 )

Author's Note:

Ugh. This is so short, and it's biggest accomplishment is an RvB-esque cutaway at the end, so I just labeled it as an intermission.
I'm sorry. Please don't kill me. I've been preoccupied. :fluttershysad:

sooooooooooooooo much beeeeeeeeeeeeer!

1039453 fine i wont kill you today but you owe me a cookie

1039496 No cookies. Have a 'stache. :moustache:

I'll have three cups o' joe, and a mug o' moe.

OH GOD I'M GOING INTO WITH DRAWL! Ahem, good story.

Wpike raised an eyebrow.

Murder? Why would I murder you?
It wouldn't help regarding the fic...
Although motivational torture is another thing. . .

754701 heh i found out about caboose is magic yesterday now i find this.. @.@ good luck to ya. -starts reading-

TWO OF MY FAVOURITE THINGS!? Well I'll be sure to read this soon! So busy with writing and reading other fanfics and more pony stuff! Of what I've read in the comments seems good!

1039453
“Huh?” Twilight shook her head. “Yeah, why?”
“You were kinda… just staring off into space.” Wpike raised an eyebrow. “Everything alright?”

Wpike?
you need the letter below the W

Ba-da-ba-ba-ba. I'm lovin' it. :rainbowlaugh:

Pretty good lil slow moving though. Church seems a little off to me even though he would be close lip'd when asked think he would of said a lil more by now eh that's just me.

soooooooooooo much beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer

A nice little intermission to set us up fir to other episode! Great chapter regardless, I can totally see that being an episode had the pony bits been cut out. Keep goin and stay golden^^

P.S. As for those who would dislike this story...

*turns to the metta*

"Sick'em"

1041079
You do know Meta is spelled with one t right?

1042086
Don' u B contra-dicktin' me! :trixieshiftleft:

"You were kinda... staring into space." Wpike raised an eyebrow.

I believe the typo is clear. Unless... this is a new character that materialized from the three houndred and twenty seventh dimension?

Now to continue reading.
Now I finished reading.

*Sigh* Twilight. If there's something I've learned from countless hours playing Starcraft/pointlessly arguing with my sister, it's that using the same failed tactics in greater force practically never works. Only thing that's gonna happen is that you get to watch a greater number of ineffective units get blown apart/go around in circles.

So you upload 5 chapters for The Piano Man without updating this once repeatedly saying The Piano Man is almost done, you upload 1 chapter and an intermission here and go start the sequel for your other story and upload another 7,000 words for that. While this still hasn't been updated. I don't want to be mean but you see where that gets irritating.:facehoof:

1048662 Thanks for the spellcheck. I only just got around to implementing it, but I'm sure you know why.

1074323 If you compare the statistics for the two stories, you'll see why. The Piano Man is more popular than this story, and I do indeed enjoy writing it more. It isn't like I'm giving up this story or anything.
The biggest reason it's been 7 days since this was updated is because I was expecting to release the Piano Man: Act II a little while ago, but delays with the cover image kept pushing it back. Every day I was anticipating releasing it, and preparing more for it, which is why no progress has been made.

TL:DR sorry. There was a good reason, and things should be back on track soon.

A good RvB crossover with MLP? Wow...... Awsome sauce

1076905 i want the severed head of a changling with the eye's torn out the ears choped off and the tingue cut off:pinkiecrazy:

1039453
cant wait to see the rest of it!!!:pinkiehappy:

Any news on an update?

1276720 Yeah, I'm actually planning to update this in the near future. (Although the next week might be a little unlikely)

Take a guess.
Never happened.

1276802
Cool. Was just wondering. Today I've decided to prod all of the stories that have not been updated in a while (1 month or longer usually) I'd like to see updated, so it's nice to see some movement.

Update!!! :ajbemused::ajbemused::ajbemused::ajbemused::ajbemused: NOW:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage:

1276802
So, still planning that update?dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Trixie_lolface_2.png
I'm sorry, but reading this comment now is an interesting experience.

WE ARE THE KNIGHTS WHO SAY NE
'
(:yay:)

...All......of.......my......WANT!!!! You f***ing GENIUS!!! Your ambiguous persona influencing character choices and actions is BRILLIANT!!! You my great sir, deserve most if not all the mustaches!
:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

CANCELLED?!? NOOOOOOOOOO! WHY? :raritydespair:

Darn..... cancelled :pinkiesad2:

Son, I am disappoint.
You mean to tell me that "You shot Church, you team-killing fucktard!" never one crossed your mind? A reference to that would have made this a 10 outta 10 with an instant fave.

Church in Equestria = depressing... but Cabose = a whole other bucket of fun! :rainbowlaugh:

Has this been canceled? If it is we are going to have problems...:pinkiecrazy:

5155949 Oh Okay! :3 *suddenly flies off without wings, defying logic!* :pinkiehappy:

1076905 Happy birthday, Story. Four years since you were last updated. RIP in pepperoni, never forgettoroni

7457119
The meme is real

Can you please pass this story to somebody else?

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