Featured In9

More Stories22

  • E Sun Princess

    In the final days of her life, an exceptionally faithful student muses on the subject of her perfect and immortal mentor Applejack.
    1,709 words · 14,260 views  ·  2,154  ·  29
  • E Princess Celestia Hates Tea

    Seriously, a lot.
    8,536 words · 39,400 views  ·  3,635  ·  54
  • E Martial Bliss

    Shining Armor learns the most important tactical lesson of his life.
    1,514 words · 16,447 views  ·  2,021  ·  27
  • E How to Remove a Unicorn Tooth

    Three missing pieces, two loving alicorns, and a single stupid decision that will set young Princess Cadence on a fresh new course.
    11,618 words · 13,062 views  ·  1,070  ·  12
  • E Derplicity

    Derpy Hooves is secretly a changeling. Nopony particularly notices, or cares.
    7,984 words · 21,301 views  ·  2,437  ·  35
  • T Shipping Sickness

    Twilight Sparkle and her bedside table: like two 'ships that pass in the night.
    2,286 words · 17,844 views  ·  1,893  ·  26
  • E Infernal Machines

    The touching tale of a pony and her pet mechanical salamander.
    8,113 words · 7,099 views  ·  563  ·  5
  • E Lady Prismia and the Princess-Goddess

    Filly Cadence turns her first heart.
    10,724 words · 4,624 views  ·  475  ·  4

Blog Posts105

  • 3w, 6d
    "Rainbow Rocks" (flagrant, persistent spoilers throughout, obvs.)

    Welcome to another edition of "Because You All Perforce Must Care What I Think."  Let's make this short and sweet, shall we, getting the unpleasant bits out of the way first.

    Category A:  Things That There Was Never Any Hope For Improvement On

    1.  Human character designs still not doing it for me.  No amount of time and effort will make our girls not look like somewhat sexualized and rainbow-hued versions of Mr. ZIP what with the huge heads and stick bodies and all.

    2.  Still no substitute for actual pony film.  Actual pony screen-time even lower than last time around.

    3.  All protagonists are suddenly skilled musicians, when canonically only Pinkie, Fluttershy (maybe?) and A.J. have even been shown handling an instrument.  And Twilight is appropriately lampshaded in the narrative, so I guess I'm only questioning Dash and Rarity?  I dunno.  Let's move on.

    Category B:  Things Actually Worse Than Last Film

    1.  Vinyl Scratch.  I am absolutely great with fandom nods.  No allergy whatsoever to seeing Octavia, Snowflake Bulk Biceps, and lots and lots of Trixie.  Welcomed.  But basic storytelling dictates that you cannot have a functionally nameless character pull not one but two eleventh-hour saves without seeding the plot properly first.  Story structure demands that the protective qualities of her omnipresent headphones be hinted at before they are used to save our heroes' bacon (something so simple as including a version of the the disapproving Celestia / Vinyl interaction we saw in the "Music to My Ears" short would have been absolutely sufficient) and the Bass Cannon Sedan needs to have been at least established (if not fully revealed) prior to its use as a problem-solver.  When you count on an audience's in-joke knowledge and delight over a character to fill in the cracks of a story, that is when your fandom nod has crossed the line.  Furthermore, I can't tell if the creators are putting her forward as a strong-silent master of her craft or actually envision her as the same loudmouthed Bohemian that the fans see and are merely having her stay mute to appease the "Nowacking or Nothing" crowd.  I wish they would just pick one, because the more the plot actually hinges on her the more distracting her silence becomes.  Thank goodness they actually had Octavia speak a line.

    2.  No Candybutt, not even in cameo.  This is not a fault in the story as such, I'm just (predictably) disappointed and furthermore holistically trepid that my functional OC will continue to fade into the background as Twilight becomes more and more Cadanceified.  She's got wings now, is a princess, and lives in a crystal castle.  All she needs is a coat of pink paint and to get married, and the narrative will have no use for dear sweet Candybutt whatsoever.

    Category C:  Things Better Than Last Film

    1-n.  Virtually everything else.  The scene compositions were more visually adventurous and intriguing, the villains had a plot which made some damn sense this time, the songs are marginally superior, plot points are followed through on and not just mentioned and dropped, and the whole thing seems to have been stitched together with a lot of love and affection for the property.  And Sunset Shimmer is handled exactly the way I wanted her to be handled.  The scene where she once again attempts bad-girl intimidation in the darkened hallway only to have it fizzle this time is just splendid, and I for one gratefully welcome Sunny as the unexplained sixth peripheral star in "Magical Mystery Cure."

    That is all.  Thoughts?

    54 comments · 632 views
  • 5w, 1d
    "Cadance of Cloudsdale," the... official soundtrack?!

    I am... a tad gobsmacked but nonetheless unquestionably overjoyed to report that via the generosity and talent of esteemed pony musician Night Breeze/Wind Wolf and my good friend S.R. Foxley, "Cadance of Cloudsdale" has an upcoming song cycle dedicated to it!  So exite!  Very yes!

    Check out the first track, "Reduit," below.  Thanks, you two.  You helped make my day.

    21 comments · 311 views
  • 5w, 5d
    "Princess Celestia Hates Tea," thoughts on a sequel.

    No secret whatsoever:  the number one reason people hate this story is the flippin' ending.

    It's not the number one reason I hate this story, but it's certainly up there.  Those of you who have gone on to read "A Short Story by Twilight Sparkle" have doubtless perceived the autobiographical inspiration in Twilight's experience, particularly this part:

    ...the whole ending felt shockingly rushed and weak, because, frankly, I was so darn tired of writing it by that point I couldn't see straight. I had testily sworn to myself that I would not endure another morning with that stupid "Tea" story hanging over my head...

    ...which is, of course, all true of me.  That said, it's not like another day of writing it would have "fixed" the ending, either.  It's been like two years now (insert shocked-dismay emoticon) and I have yet to come up with a "better" ending that feels right.

    So.  Message received, from like hundreds of you.  You hate the ending.  I get it.  I hate it too.  It's too late to edit the original story, but if it had a sequel, what do you most want to see in it?  What, specifically, chafes your gizzard about how this story closes?  The general lack of all-around happy?  That Twilight doesn't get her just desserts for an entire evening of torturing Celestia with the memory spell?  That, in a world where you can literally turn birds into oranges, that some kind of solution wasn't forced using unicorn magic?  What?

    Please note that the characters will remain kind of panicky and stupid, so if the fact that the characters are panicky and stupid is your major beef, I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to accommodate a fix of that nature.

    103 comments · 810 views
  • 7w, 2d
    "Cadance of Cloudsdale" gets another addition...

    In a short story done for a fic competition!  It was written by Eakin, a master of arts; his story "Hard Reset" is top of the charts.  This one is does not deal with time loops and despair, but rather a fortress and the Sisterhood there.  I'm so glad to see another tale told of our Pretty Pink Princess when she was just a foal.  It's really good work--if I haven't been clear--and I recommend checking it out over here.

    (If you are concerned why I'm talking this way, it's apparently "Type Like Zecora Day."  I find my Zecora-style writing quite dismal on account of my rhymes being hella abysmal.)

    18 comments · 363 views
  • 10w, 16h
    "Princess Celestia Hates Tea" in comic format!

    35 comments · 962 views
  • ...

This story is a sequel to Princess Celestia Hates Tea

Princess Celestia helps to banish a hoofful of inner demons lurking deep in the heart of a troubled author.  Metafiction, again, ensues.  Something of a coda to "Princess Celestia Hates Tea".

First Published
5th Jun 2012
Last Modified
5th Jun 2012
#1 · 124w, 5d ago · 7 · ·

I finally get off my arse and actually begin to write fanfiction of my own, then this comes up. Thanks allot skywriter...

#2 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Um... I'm confused, but good story anyways!

#3 · 124w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

This... this is beautiful. Made me tear up. :fluttercry:

#4 · 124w, 5d ago · 6 · ·

This made me grin like crazy.

Don't ever stop, Skywriter.

#5 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

An interesting take...

#6 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

>>697070 I know how you feel...

#7 · 124w, 5d ago · 4 · ·

The kind of story I find myself appreciating more and more tends to focus on opening an image and exploring it in order to produce a metaphor, and I thought the Yixing teacup's relation to storycraft was well turned. Princess Celestia also speaks like Princess Celestia -- ever-patient, tranquil, at peace with non-peace (especially when that non-peace comes through Twilight)...

Look at me, spewing all of this pretentious garbage. I'm practically eating out of your hoof, aren't I?

#8 · 124w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

So, I have to wonder, where in the process of writing Princess Celestia Hates Tea did the conception of this particular, cute little tale arrive? Before? During? After?

And would Twilight really write "heartbreakingly sculpted muzzle" in a story assignment she was going to give to Celestia to read? Oh my! She's very revealing about herself, especially in those first few paragraphs.

#9 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

That's remarkably well-done!  Bravo!

#10 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·


#11 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Nice! I liked this one, a very good little short.

#12 · 124w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

And that's how Skywriter never wrote a real story again

I may have unleashed a power I cannot contain

#13 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Oh bravo!  Consider that .gif of the guy clapping inserted.  A lovely little haiku of a story!

#14 · 124w, 5d ago · 5 · ·


Next I'm going to write a story about a fictional version of Twilight Sparkle writing a story about how she wrote a fictional version of Twilight Sparkle who was obsessing about having written a story about Princess Celestia not liking tea.  And so on.  It will be a beautiful Jenga tower of navel-gazing.

#15 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·


Afterward.  I was like, oh, hells, no, not another one of these.  I'm waiting for the backlash.

And, yes, she's being a little forward.  The poor dear is so confused.  She doesn't even know what she's feeling half the time.

#17 · 124w, 5d ago · 4 · ·


And then your self-insert oc will show up and Twilight will get mad at him for writing weird stories about her.

#18 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

>>697253 I had a feeling there was an undertone of forwardness there. I was about to ask if this was actually the prelude to ANOTHER layer of story, which is the 3rd person comedy/romance story you write about Twilight trying to win over Princess Celestia.

Specifically when you said, "not another one of these," what were you referencing?

#19 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Solid beyond belief, and really just... It's a great look at Twilight, and it's a fantastic follow-up to "Tea". Really puts it in context.

#20 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Your stories make me smile, eh.  And with this one, you really got the mood exactly right at the end. Once again, thank you for sharing, eh! :twilightsmile:

Hmmm... maybe I ought to try writing something small / one-scene-ish...

#21 · 124w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

...I went back to the top to read it again afterward, but then stopped because I thought I might end up trapping myself in some sort of weird loop if I kept it up.  :derpyderp2:

#22 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

I'm such a meta addict.

#23 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

This is probably getting featured....I CALL IT!

#24 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Another Skywriter story that will be featured...

I read enough metafiction in "The Things They Carried" as it is. I don't need any more.

#25 · 124w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

"I love wasabi, usually. I love saunas and cold showers. I love hot ginger beer. I love things that make me feel, because I spent so many years of my life not feeling and not even particularly caring if I felt or not, and I'm really trying to make up for lost time, here. But it hardly seemed fitting to be coughing and hacking in the presence of the Princess.

It's not even the rudeness that I'm most concerned about. The worst thing about acting like a lump of sapient clay in front of the most perfect and regal creature on the face of the planet is…"

LOVELY. i LOVE what you did there. Never seen anypony else do it before, why the hell not?

A great story.

P.S. And to think, Celestia Hates Tea hasn't even left the featured box yet.

#26 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·


Another story that won't let me rest until it's out.  I've got Srs Comic Stuff I need to do, and it's a little loud in here with all these ponies.

#27 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Your metaness makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Also, I'm drinking tea right now. How weird.

#28 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Love it. :rainbowkiss:

#29 · 124w, 5d ago · · ·

Oh and the title of her next story from how i saw it was "No Title Too Simple". :pinkiesmile:

#30 · 124w, 4d ago · 2 · ·

I'm So Meta, Even This Acronym.

#31 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

> "There will never be a perfect cup of tea served in Yixing teaware," said the Princess, nodding. "Each cup brewed is different than the last, as the teaware itself moves through time." She looked at me, then, whimsically sly. "Through teatime, specifically. But one thing is certain: each cup, good or not-as-good, will do nothing but increase the delightful complexity of the next. There is never an end to the process, never a single perfect iteration. Eventually, after hundreds more years, I may arrive at a point where I am drinking something so close to the perfect cup that it might as well be that thing.  But, until that far-off day, every cup of tea I drink has value in the essence it gives to the future. Is my parable clear, my Faithful Student?"

Woa. That was brilliant.

#32 · 124w, 4d ago · 1 · ·


Heartbreaking, isn't it?  I've been reading JCW's works for over ten years, and writing sporadically during those same ten years, and the gap just grows.

Skywriter, this story is itself like a teatime, a calming sip that pauses the day.  Thank you.

#33 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

I'm thinking Meta should be a tag. Are there enough Metafics to warrant that?

#34 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

Too much meta! :raritydespair:

#35 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

This is quite nice.

How can you do this to me!? This is meta, I'm not supposed to like it.

Breaking my convictions left and right, you people ... I'm fine with that. :twilightsheepish:

#36 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

"For all my years, and for all the sorrowful things I have witnessed, I have seen an equal measure of joy, and I am very much at peace."

While I buy the first line about not being deeply turmoiled, I don't believe Celestia when she says she's very much at piece. Life is full of conflict that destroys that piece and unless this Celestia has shut her inner self from the world, I don't see it as possible for her not to be plagued inner demons and doubts.

#37 · 124w, 4d ago · 2 · ·


Interesting that this Celestia then goes right on to claim "secrets I must keep because of who I am".  SOUNDS LIKE INNER DEMONS TO ME, CELLY.

#38 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

Yo dawg, I herd u liek fanfiction.

#39 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·


Nope, guess again.

#40 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·


#41 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

Congrats on having TWO stories in the feature box!

The features have been doubled!

#42 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·


You currently have two stories in the featured box.

Just floating that.

#43 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

Wow.  I feel kinda guilty that I haven't read 'Princess Celestia Hates Tea' now.:facehoof:  Gotta get on that.

I really love the fact that Yixing teapots are actually real.  It's those little obscure things that add a level of depth to a story that can't be matched in any other way.

#44 · 124w, 4d ago · 4 · ·

You wrote this just to make us stop wanting to sock that story's Twilight in the muzzle, didn't you?

Also, I think I have a fetish for fanfiction about fanfiction. I enjoy most far beyond the attributes of said story otherwise.

#45 · 124w, 4d ago · 3 · ·


"Contraptionology!" has Twilight as a minor side player / contributing antagonist, and "...Tea" basically has her as the principal antagonist.  It was beginning to make me feel (a) like people would think I was hating on the character or (b) like I was actually hating on the character.  Time for some Twilove, says the writer-brain.  Hence, this.

#46 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

People throughout fiction love tea. People throughout the world love tea.

I feel lesser for not.

#47 · 124w, 4d ago · 1 · ·


I was referring purely to her characterization, not your motivations for said depiction.

I never assumed you didn't like her. Observatory Hill starred her. You write her too earnestly, even when slightly corrupted, to not enjoy her as a character. Even though you kinda called her fat in this fic.

It wasn't even that bad after fics like "Why didn't I stay at the farm" and "The Business Trip".

#48 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

Yeah, okay. This was brilliant. :) Celestia hates tea was well deserving of the feature box that's been holding it for the best part of a week. Thanks for sharing!

#49 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·

I'm not a fan of meta as a rule... but I was won over by this. What's particularly impressive is that it's a really very decent story in its own right, even for those who've never read "...Tea". Making an in-joke that's still accessible to outsiders takes quite something.

#50 · 124w, 4d ago · · ·


It's funny you describe Twilight as the antagonist, because I had initially put down 'Princess Celestia Hates Tea' after the first scene and the entirety of my thought process about it at the time was, I kid you not, "Oh, I don't like Tyrant!Celestia fics."

So suffice it to say I consider Twilight the sympathetic character there and Celestia at best a victim of karma. Didn't she get a friendship report about keeping secrets from her friends?

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