Celestia and Luna's royal bard. Nature is my God, Art is my religion, Love is the Law. Concordia Invictus
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The Sparkles are a very old Canterlot family. Like any old family they have traditions. One of these traditions is that a Sparkle must do noble deeds to win their love-a tradition going as far back as Sir Prancealot. These are the noble deeds Lady Twilight Sparkle did to win the hoof and heart of Princess Celestia.
Now has a sequel! (https://www.fimfiction.net/story/362471/seasons-of-the-heart)
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I liked this, will there be more?
If you do another editing pass on this could you go back and break up some of these run on paragraphs? It would make it a lot easier to read.
6802015 I see your point.
6800846 Yes. I plan for this to be a rather long story.
I promised myself to wait to read this until it was longer....
I broke that promise.
Honestly for Crystalish I would have recommended, Russian, or Polsky.
A slightly rushed start, but the pace seems to be getting into a better groove towards the end of the chapter. An intersting idea, and I look forward to seeing where it goes.
Yeah the pacing is getting there, though still a little fast in a way. Rather, things seem to just happen in a few too few words, lacking just that little extra bit of descriptive filling to be great.
Then again, I came directly from re-reading eternal, so I might just be blinded by its excessive use of flowery prose and lengthy drawn out word marathons.
6852614 I could only hope to be like the writer of Eternal. That's one of my favorite fics.
MOAR PLZ
Weren't there two more chapters?
6862027 I'm currently editing them.
6851278 I edited the first chapter to try to fill things out if you want to take a look.
6862051 Ah, gotcha. Thought I was imagining things.
6816527 The reason I chose Latin is because the only named ponies involved with the Crystal Empire have Latin-based names. Sombra is Spanish for shadow and Mi Amore Cadenza is Italian. Italian is about as close as you can get to Latin. Besides Latin is the language of love to the point that ancient Latins considered themselves descendants of the Love Goddess.
Though, Russian or Polski would have worked.
Nice. This story is original and fun and lol at the drunk Twilight kissing Celestia.
While it's a nice story and all (though it's not my favourite twi ship, which would be twiluna) i feel when making a loved one pancakes you wouldn't just take remade perfect batter from the kitchen and basically just heat it up. while it is a nice gesture, i feel it would be better making batter from scratch. it adds quite a bit of personality if you make the batter yourself.
wow i am nitpicky... i guess thats what i get when i'm learning to be a chef lol.
Great story, keep up the good work.
6904872 (Here's a secret. I have no idea how to make pancakes. My ma always uses pancake mix. Will correct that part of the story though.) Thanks for the review.
This is adorable.
In RL, many Witches and Wiccans practice martial arts. Huh I did not know that,Cool!
celestia your fool *faceplams* just take her to bed already cause twi will probably be so hearth broken she will do a suicide
6973810 Not suicide, but the next chapter's going to heat things up. Twilight will find herself in a fiery situation. No, she's not getting banished to the sun.
Incoming sexy dream
6974168 *pouts* just make it good ok or wona here Will give you nightmares
I don't like coffee either.
Either way, good chapter. Looking forward to the next!
When's the next chapter? Q_Q
7079509 Soon.
WELL. This can only end well. *slips on the puddle of sarcasm*
In all seriousness, this is a great story. I've been enjoying it tremendously.
No twilight No quests to win a fair princesses heart must be taken alone for the gears of fate will grind the others to dust
ALSO, why do I get the feeling that that necklace will make her immortal?
Well... Doesn't this look like it can only end in fire and screaming?
...Nah. I'm sure it will go well. Really!
Dragons and incinerating hellfire aside, I don't think Celestia is going to be entirely happy with getting the necklace back if this Dragon Lord of the North turns out to not have left his palace. After all, do not poke dragons or their treasure for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
Unless, of course, Twilight puts on her Big Girl horseshoes and beats the motherfucker unconscious with a boulder.
this song popped into my head when i saw this fanfiction
https://youtu.be/bgiQD56eWDk
yes a "Sleepover" party. Maybe with some "Partyfavors and Dary" as well.
"Where's Twilight, Luna?"
"Oh, I told her about that necklace and she went to the Dragon Kingdom to get it back for you n.n"
"She WHAT!!?? LUNA ARE YOU FUCKING MAD!!?? SHE COULD DIE!!"
EEEK! EPIC QUEST TO HELP WIN THE HEART OF THE PRINCESS!
Oh ,Twilight, you dog! You rapscallion, you!
Getting the band back together too!
I'm looking forward to how this turns out.
"Welp, we lost Pinkie and Rarity and Rainbow ain't gonna be flying no more. But at least we got you your necklace, so that evens things out."
Oh, and also?
I have a feeling Cadance's subjects are going to be getting an unpleasant surprise if Twilight's trip north goes south.
no fucking shit shur-fucking-lock
pegasi
muslimsocialservicesagency.org/wp-content/themes/triple-facepalm-picard-i16.jpg
derpicdn.net/img/2013/7/18/377755/large.png the cake is a lie
pegasi
you
read that sentence out loud and see if it makes sense
7202450 I read it out loud. It makes sense.
7202525 you need to use dragged in there not drug
7203316 It's Classical Equestrian which Celestia occasionally slips into particularly when she's agitated.
7203554 ok
The idea of Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Nerds, performing anything like a roundhouse kick is absolutely amazing.
ADVENTURE
This is going to either go belly up or be straight up fairy tale and it's going to be awesome either way.
Pancakes are cooked in a pan, sorta fried in butter. You pour the batter into a greased pan and let it cook. The consistancy of the batter determines if you get thin or fluffy jacks. When the batter starts to turn firm you flip it and cook the other side.
I dunno if you can also bake them in the oven, it sounds possible with the right know how, but me and mine have always used the stovetop.
I was very glad to see this updated! Celestia isn't going to be too happy about the state the Mane Six. I guess the question now is if Celestia will finally give in.
I NEED MOAR NOW!!!!
The pacing is kind of bad. The whole story feels so far feels kind of run-on, and I don't necessarily mean sentence structure. It's like someone clipped out all the bits between each thing happening and glued the result back together.
I like the story itself but it's hard to reconcile with this.
PieDash... Really?
I really like this, you've done a fantastic job. I do have one question for you though.
Earlier in the fic, Twilight said that Dash was the one that trained her in martial arts, why would she ask if Twilight could fight when she already knows the answer?