Thirty years after the fall of Princess Luna, another dark pony had risen, the Golem King. His rule in the north and was stuff of nightmares and his threats had finally forced Celestia's hand. Now the princess stands outside his fortress in the north for the final confrontation of a pony who she once called faithful student.
Yet, for as evil as his actions were, perhaps they were more then a simple power grab.
Review Posted: https://www.fimfiction.net/group/212612/hidden-gems/thread/334268/duality
as the equestria -- as the Equestria
today.” Replied -- today,” replied
Celestia hesitated for a moment, “He -- Celestia hesitated for a moment. “He
Many tense clashes in the first paragraph of flashback. I suggest sticking to past tense.
sin to bare -- sin to bear
In stead -- Instead
down fall -- downfall (x2)
“Foolish crusade?” Dual Purpose questioned, “If you thought that invading Equestria was my goal, then I would agree with you, princess.” -- The questioned action appears to want to attach to the first statement, but is instead attached to the second, which has no question.