Mindblade16
Joined 8th Jan, 2013 ·
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I liked it, definitely looking forward to more of this
6176834 Thanks!
Hehe, bravo once again. I can't wait to see what Rarity had in mind
I'm sorry but it's very mediocre. It's just another self-insert clop fic in a sea of self-insert clop fics. But it's not just the premise that's bad. Your punctuation is all over the place. But hey, it could be good; it's not very far in yet. Maybe you can change my mind from the direction I've convinced myself it's going.
6180374 What would you do to improve on it? Besides what you've already stated?
6180393 The problem with fics like these is that there are just so many of them that it's hard to be original with it. I guess more exposition and back story would be a good start. Also, I'll say upfront that Sophistication and Betrayal is the best Rarity x human story out there and it has jaded me to similar fics, but I guess nothing ventured...
6180408 I'll give it a read. Sounds interesting.
6180408 Holy Hell! Over 300,000 words! No wonder you thought my work was mediocre! I barely do 1000 words per chapter! Honestly, I'm not on that level yet. This was supposed to be a fun clop story to show to my facebook group, but I'm reminded of the standards that I had forgotten.
6180500 You don't have to make each chapter a million words to have a good fic. You just have to remember good punctuation and grammar, and set out to do something unique. HiE is played out to be sure, but that doesn't mean it can't still be done well and be entertaining.
i like it so far
6180552 The real point of this story is reconciling my own feelings for MLPFIM and the Clopper's Sexuality that I've kinda been toying with ever since I saw the work of TiaraWhy.
Also, this image
http://www.deviantart.com/art/But-I-didn-t-listen-524720973
was the furthest into real clop I had ever gotten off to.
So, yeah. I'm working out those feelings in this ponyfic. It's not an original idea, for sure. But I didn't set out to write something like that.
It started out as one thing, and turned into another. I'll keep writing, and I'll work on my technical writing skills more.
So far so good.Good first chapter.
6180608
Correcting one thing Cunny there mentioned. You don't have to be unique or original in your story's idea. 9/10 times the idea you think of has been done before, especially by prolific authors who are trying to get noticed more/more attention/more followers. People will unfairly judge you about something outside of your control: how many other people have written on the same idea before you.
So ignore that. Just make sure it's your own flair and try to make it more appealing. The description could use a lot of work. Make it look like the hook to a story, not "Dear Diary I Wish I Could Fuck Rarity", like so many others do. You are going to be writing something where the idea has been so done to death that any stories on it that don't set themselves apart somehow are automatically reviled, so try not to look like those stories going in, too.
6180806 Thanks for the advice.
Great story so far! I'm really looking forward to seeing the rest of it! Oh but poor Matthew!
So will this story continue?