• Member Since 9th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen Jun 30th, 2021

Shrouded_Legacy


Stay a while and listen...

T

Twilight's made several mistakes over the course of her life, but each was, more or less, minor. Even turning the population of Ponyville into a mob over her childhood doll was corrected easily and forgiven quickly. But when she ignored all of her teachings and left her friends to search for the Crystal Heart alone, she made a mistake that would cost her the life she cherished. She fought fire with fire, and ended up burnt.

Cover Art by : KyssS90 on DA. :)

PPS: I need to do a full re-work of the concept in light of re-reads. Twilight's section turned out fine, but I ended up hating Luna's section and her story was integral to Twilight's. I'm also working on something else right now, so I may not have the chance to return. I'm sorry guys, but for now I'll be walking away from this one.

Chapters (10)
Comments ( 48 )

I'd say this definitely has promise. At first I thought it was a generic "Twilight gets corrupted by Sombra" fic, but it's well written and looks to be heading in an interesting direction, with Sombra leaving Twilight to potentially corrupt herself. I'd like very much to see this continued.

I sure hope that you continue! I love Sombra fanfics!

This sounds very cool, and I would love to see more of it.

So far I like Sombra, and while I doubt that any of Twilight's friends or princesses would turn against her for this, I could see Twi turning to Sombra after a(n un)healthy helping of misunderstanding and self-doubt. Provided it is written well, and this first chapter, at least, was written far better than many Twi-turns-evil stories on here.

Eagerly awaiting any future updates. :pinkiesmile:

I am the only who wants a Twilight vs Spike chapter in this story that will be a good fight!

“You have a lot to think about. Until you understand just how grave of an error it was to fight evil with evil, there is nothing more I can teach you.”

Welp, Twi, you are halfway to obtaining my sanction to descend into insanity.

So many times she and her friends had shown friendship, had shown love, to be the penultimate of magic in power and versatility,

Penultimate? Then what is the ultimate, if I might ask?

friends to you? If they had to choose between you and Celestia, who would follow you willingly into the dark?”

Was the color shift in the middle here intentional?

“To answer your doubt, we must first actually speak to them. I have five very dear friends who hold me dear as well, so I would hypothesize that they will be supportive of me.”

Phew, good catch, Twi. I almost thought the Nightmare was going to cheat for the other half of my sanction. Your friends need to turn their backs on you (or at least appear to) for reals, in person, not in your head.

Her eyes trailed the silhouette of the castle to Luna's tower, the Eclipse Spire.

You named Luna's Tower? Hmm. Hope that means there is much more to see of Luna in the future.

Maybe there would be tomes of lost arcanum, or even supplimental reading on the Changelings or the Nightmare, if maybe Luna kept a tome for memoirs or something to that matter? She started to get excited about what she might find.

Dude, I was excited at "lost arcanum". Also Typo, should be "supplemental".

Fun read! Please don't stop. :twilightsmile:

6052590

Penultimate? Then what is the ultimate, if I might ask?

I hope to get into this later on, maybe another chapter or two :)

Phew, good catch, Twi.

Yeah, she's probably smarter than me, to be honest Xp

The color shift was supposed to be after the emphatic you, so I'll go back and fix that :)

Also, thanks for the time vested and the typo catch :) I'm working on the third chapter now, and hopefully it won't disappoint.

I'm calling it right now.Nightmare Twilight.

Well maybe it won't be Nightmare Twilight.I'm now starting to think Twilight will instead become a neutral force.I hope Twilight kicks Trixie's butt.

6162324 there will certainly be some plot-kicking upon her return to Ponyville, of that you can be assured.

Just to clarify, when you say "moons" you mean months, or about that long, right?

Holy Untrustworthy info-dumps, Batman! Who knows what out of that is true, as this is coming from someone who finds it irksome that you still dislike her after you personally fought and stopped her from ending the world just a year or two ago. Also so many names and hints of Things of great power.

There is a lot of things that seem to be happening really fast, here. Looks like a wild ride, and I am looking forward to some badass (Nightmare [sorta] [or not]) Twilight in the future.

I hope there will be more interaction between Sombra and Twilight soon.:heart:

Who was she that Sombra was talking about?

6206945 Oh, come now. I can't reveal plot twist 204-KPF, it would just be unprofessional. I pride myself on my professionalism :scootangel:

I am interested to see how all of my pony followers will react to it when it comes out though....

I'm going to give this a try BUT, Twilight was told by Celestia herself they she had to do this on her own.

Well Celestia, you put her in a nearly no win situation.

1: You and Luna couldn't or didn't destroy Sombra in the past so what makes you think she could succeed?

2: You didn't even send Luna to run interference so Twilight was on the clock.

3: Twilight just experienced her worst fear before facing Sombra and if the hints are correct and the Fall of the Crystal Empire is canon for this story she DAMN wellknows what's that like and she failed of that herself 1000 years ago.

If anyone failed here it was you Celestia by SITTING ON YOUR PLOT AND NOT COVERING TWILIGHT. You gambled a Kingdom on a test.

6236743 This is something that I have referenced a couple of times, once being in the opening lines of the story. Did I imply otherwise elsewhere? :rainbowhuh:

6237015 well it sounded like she ignored Celestia's words but in this instence she did.

How come Celestia isn't doing anything about Ponyville. In Canon she was busy with the Saddle Arabians so wasn't around to see what was going on. Here she has a clear view something is up. Celestia is being really incompentant in this story.

And so necromantic magic is revealed to be the best around. Awesome.

Souls are just so needy, y'know? Always messing with your designs and mind after you shove 'em into the battery pack. Why can't they just shut up and be happy to be part of a badass weapon?

Also, is it called the "Voidsever" or the "Grimsever" or both?

And lastly, I like the whole using a rune as a focus thing to accelerate and hide spellcasting, but accidentally inscribing a rune into your eyes? That seems a bit of a stretch.

6237076

How come Celestia isn't doing anything about Ponyville.

Keep in mind that Sombra is back in power, so there's preparations to be made for that, and now we know that Discord is back, so she would be running interference on that. Twilight has been out for a couple of months, and once we see a bit more of the world, it becomes even clearer that things are different with a dark Crystal Heart.

non-spoiler version: Things are not always as they appear. Off screen characters have lives as well.

6237004 This however is pretty apt. We know now that she was trying to get Twilight ready for being a princess, but in this AU it turned out a fair bit different, due to the Royal Sisters not running reconnaissance or interference. Luna tried to help, but her ability to this point has been limited.

6237108 I was originally calling it the Grimsever, but tried to change it... I guessed I missed a few, sorry :(:facehoof:

And so necromantic magic is revealed to be the best around. Awesome.

Took me a bit longer to get out, but yep. Only thing stronger than having friends is killing them, apparently.:pinkiecrazy:

accidentally inscribing a rune into your eyes? That seems a bit of a stretch.

Well, it's not quite so simple. A little bit reference to an Anime called "The Legend of the Legendary Heroes", and a little bit reference to basic runic spell casting, Being the element of magic can difficult sometimes. Also remember that last chapter I dabbled a bit in blood magic, where the shadow casters would inscribe runes inside themselves.

OOoooookay.

Calm the hell down, Twi.

So, Starswirl was wrong? Discord does enjoy a bit of mass slaughter from time to time?

It feels like Twi went batshit cray cray a little too fast, but I guess the Voidsever is really powerful like that? Honestly sounded like the Hollow was the best one, since it only started to affect you if you lost it.

Never yell the words "This is the price of Arrogance" Just don't do it. You can't be the good guy and yell those words. Maybe if you said them at a normal volume, or said something like "Your arrogance was your undoing", but painting yourself as the harbinger of fate while yelling at someone that they are arrogant...

Fun story. Really picking up the pace, now that Twi has prepped herself. Can't wait to see the next chapter, and sad that I will have to. Good luck with your exam! Hope it goes well for you. See ya in a while.

6237097 I'm sorry it didn't live up to expectations. Any tips on how to make it better next time?:twilightsmile:

6237211 Well one it was that Trixie was being able to pull off her conquest of Ponyville with Celestia still in Canterlot. Then outting in Discord like that. Twilight was doing great being more anti hero or dark hero then what the last chapter did. Her killing Trixie and Discord showing up was what killed this for me.

I don't know why but i do love a story were the main character becomes a dark but complete badass. Can't wait for more.:pinkiehappy:

Go Twilight ! Show Sombra what your really made of.

ASHI-SENPAI!!! YOU ARE THE BEST AT GAMES!!!

Please please please do more please I am in love with the story

6237004 Just about every major villain becomes a major problem because Celestia won't do anything.
Let's be honest; there is no way that the love of one stallion is enough for you to overpower something that raises the sun.

7553838 While Tia is an idito for letting all these villains live i do think the love of one stallion would be enough, especially a stallion like Shining who adores Cadance.

Thank you. You have captured us in the threads of the story. I am glad you are continuing. I have a shelf of stories that haven't been updated in a year minimally, but would read them all in a heartbeat.

7588699 Thank you as well:twilightsmile:. It's always nice to hear that people enjoy my craft, especially well enough that they would be willing to wait a year to finish the story :). It is an active pursuit still, so if you have any feedback or questions feel free to shoot me a comment or PM. I try to stay engaged with my readers, it helps me grow as a writer :scootangel::raritywink:

She might have something to incapacitate me, bring me before 'Dear Sister'

I saw this and thought 'Big Brother'

7593928 lol It does have that kind of... authoritarian feeling doesn't it? coincidence or mental insight? ;)

New chapter is great, can't wait for more

“Oops, I did it again, Celestia. I played with your heart...”

9113168
Yeah, I'm just not sure how long it will take to make the necessary revisions. I have three more chapters written, but I haven't been able to get anybody to proofread them, and I'm not satisfied with them because I feel they are inappropriate to the characters. I'm glad people are still reading this though. Thank you for commenting :)

I'll put this in read later and if it ever comes off hiatus I'll give it a whirl.

9199753
Please do I hate not being able to know what happens.

any idea when we can expect an update and new chapter?

Login or register to comment