Shipfic by TAW with no clop in it?

WHAAAAAAAAT.

Damn this timing.

I have to go into the secure lab in 5 minutes and stay there all fucking day.

Read later FTW

What about some MOAR clop?

Before reading, I'll put it out there:

Shipping? Without Horse-sex? Who are you and what have you done with TAW

Second non-clop fic I believe?

Always fun to see how people do out of their comfort zone...or at least seeing some variety

Onwards to Twilestia

TAW - clop?

HOLY SHIT.

Pinkie Pie is credit to town.

At Celestias 3rd try for the reply to Twilight there is a typo, stunent instead of student

Define full sized, for me that's around the 100.000 word mark

It is my favorite pairing though

oh

oh my

so this is what you were talking about the other time

Wait, no clop? And it's written by TAW? WHAT HAS SCIENCE DONE?!

TAW WITHOUT CLOP!!!!

MIND=BLOWN!!!!

tracking lolz

No Clop...And by TAW?

Image: http://img7.imagebanana.com/img/kvucb02z/WHYEngineer.jpg

>>533221533221

That's a lie and you know it.

The description began with the word "Because" that means clop begins roughly 15 - 30 lines in.

What I said before proved to be right: I want more!

more Celestia not knowing what to do with herself, more Twilight freaking out over missed deadlines, more cuddley kissy goodness, and finally: more Twilight picking up Celestia with her magic.

Looking forward to the next one.

To be honest, I  kinda see this turning into a double ship fic... Like please, luna may be really happy for luna, but 1000 years on the moon, then doing all this royalty stuff while her sister is grinning like an idiot because her and her mare friend are going out star gazing in about an hour on the mountains MUST yank the jealosy strings so hard there a meter out of her chest!

"Celestia glared at him with the full force of the sun and over two thousand years of practice, stress, and repressed hatred."

Image: http://jamiebrownmusic.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/glare3.jpg

... This is how i imagined it looked.

This is good work. I would like more, and if you decide to add some sexy-time-business to the equation I would not be adverse to that.... but it hasn't suffered without it.

EDIT: Oh it's complete... well then I guess I will have to find another source for my twilestia addiction... oh well it was still a good read.

A very sweet tale. I enjoyed how quietly they slid into the relationship. Good work.

Alright, finished this behemoth of TAW-ness

Guess I'll write as I read.

=

First chapter was perfect spelling and grammar-wise. Always great in my book, but often ignored;

All very in character.

-

"Celestia help her, she had no idea." - Pretty funny when you think about it. At least Luna stepped up to help

It seems that the instances you used the é for café were changed to 'café', how unfortunate

I found it appropriate that "Can't fight this feeling anymore" by REO Speedwagon & Can't Lose by Shiro Sagisu (off the Bleach OST) came on during my reading of this.

'Somebody had stolen her coffee! "Prin- Celestia, where did my coffee go?" '

You used an actual salt bar Excellent way to incorperate show canon elements

' "TWO THOUSAND YEARS, TWILIGHT." Celestia suddenly yelled.' - I actually laughed aloud from reading that line

By the letters exchange, I was tearing a bit. I mean smiley faces? Really

The verbal back-and-forth between Celestia and Luna while she tries to deny any feelings toward Twilight? Nicely done as well.

Spike in regards to getting sick from eating not only the muffin but the ice cream as well was a nice touch, makes him feel even more in character.

"It was just practise, going through the motions - not the e-motions."  - I REALLY like this line, not only is it fun to read, but it also correctly uses "practise".

"Celestia sighed. This was harder in person than it was in letters - all she wanted to do was heart the dots on her is" - missing an apostrophe "i's"?

' "Celestia" and "Love" fitted together...' - Sounds alright, but maybe they "fit together perfectly in Twilight's mind", even if it does break from past to present tense for a second

Also, that entire paragraph of explanation? Very Twilight. It's reenforced by what we've seen from Twilight in the show.

'Twilight smiled. "Celestia, I studied under you for years. I already know you're worth it." ' - Awwww

'Celestia glared at him with the full force of the sun and over two thousand years of practice, stress, and repressed hatred.' - At this point, "Drama Link (b)", off of the Ren & Stimpy original music score, played. Very fitting (Old show sound bits will do that)

"Twilight, I made most of those rules. I can't enjoy them, it's like casting your own spell - you just see all the imperfections, it ruins it," Celestia explained.

- THIS. This line man, I know that feel Anyone who's created anything knows that feeling. Probably many on this site as well. (Although in my case it applies more to art and music, rather than writing)

"When Celestia refused to move, Twilight picked her up and carried her in an intense magical glow. Twilight did not get turned down often." - "...And I'm not taking no for an answer!" Sounds very familiar.

' "Celestia!" she exclaimed, "You stop that this instant. Come on, look through this," she commanded' - Twilight retains her air of leadership, even when the subject is Celestia.

"It was 1500 light years away, was shaped like a head, played a large part in the Orion constellation, and oh gosh Celestia was kissing her." - I did a double-take when I read that. Nicely done.

What a light hearted way to end the chapter.

-

Chapter 3 was nice & simple way to wrap up the story. That's all I really have to say about it.

=

All in all, I liked the way you wrote Celestia. Too many parts that were fun to read. The way she reacts with Twilight is excellent! Looking out for her, but also having her fun (I wonder which irritating 'celebrity' couple was rained on due to Twi's haste/aero style spell).

TAW, you're aweso- scratch that, TAWesome

...

()

This only proves once again that I can pretty much read and enjoy anything by you (given the time)

...

I may or may not have opened up notepad alongside reading this to take notes;

Sorry for this wall of text, and keep doing what you do!

(PS. Thumbs up'd and Favourited, if it wasn't obvious already)

(PPS. TL:DR - This is well done, you rock & you should do more of it)

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

oh man...you are a genius

TAW.... you deserve a medal ceremony

Image: http://www.njoe.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/star-wars-ceremony.jpg

TAW... son of MAW. You have honored FimFiction with a beautiful story. You have proven to us that you're not just a Clop Writer, you're a romance writer. And that is beautiful. Write more of this sir.

this one doesn't need clop to be good. it's just that damn good. it's the perfect size, perfect length and the story played out perfectly. you sir, deserve a mustache.

On an Unrelated topic, the way they draw celestia's eye is just stunning.

GAH. TOO MANY PONIES. THINK MANLY THOUGHTS AND EAT MANLY FOOD WHILE LISTENING TO MANLY MUSIC

The description alone earned a thumb from me.

I'll read it later.

Nice!

You're pretty good at writing non-clop stories as well (as evidenced by Unchangeable and this)

LMAO at the description

>>533261533261

Oh, there'll be more of that, don't worry.

>>533284533284

I know, I'm crazy. Crazy!

>>533375533375

Even princesses can make typos! It was totally intentional I swear maybe almost

>>533415533415

A coherent story arc from start to finish, a self-contained piece. Length is proportional to how much you have to say.

>>533615533615>>533619533619>>533644533644

I mark almost everything complete if it's a self-contained one-shot, but that doesn't preclude more, it just means that it ideally shouldn't leave any strings hanging

>>533661533661

Thank you... I think!

>>533690533690

Bueno.

>>533904533904

The conversations were meant to establish a baseline for Celestia being more vulnerable than usually depicted, and everything else kind of spirals off of that, without them I'd completely agree with everything you said. I absolutely do ignore the complications, but at the same time they're never touched on at all - they aren't what this story is about. It's very much a generic >shipping tale with few new or interesting ideas, but we all have to start somewhere.

>>533922533922

Too many people equate generic with bad, but there's a reason why it is considered the 'standard' I for one would love to read more

>>533964533964

Absolutely, but his (now vanished) criticisms were perfectly valid.

>>533375533375 can you blame a 1000 year old godess for that?

Ewww, no  clop

Okay, joke aside, shipping was the boat that brought me here, and I always enjoy to take a ride from time to time. It's a really promising chapter, and I'm eager to see how it's going to continue.

i will read. anyway before i do wanna A. read my story B. join my group C. both D. nether.

"talk to somepony that raised her tail"

What an interesting metaphor . . . or maybe not so metaphorical. :P

Aww. No clop?

Still, it was a quite enjoyable read.

3rd Post: Now you've been featured!

Congrats Sir TAW

>>534239534239

Maybe later ;)

The ending joke was pro.

>>533221533221 I knooooow right?

Great story :3 I honestly always thought it would be cool to see you write a story now without any clop :o

And you did it!!! :D

I adore your Luna character.

And that star message.....Priceless  

This is best Twilestia shipfic.

> Because sometimes

Oh coola new TAW fic.

> Doesn't end in horse sex

Oh, my bad, thought you were TAW.

That was some excellent twilestia, right there

Loved it, the ease in which they slipped into the relationship was great change of pace from many Twilestia fics.

Fillies and Gentlecolts, I believe we have see the first instance of...

LUNOWNED

Image: http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/041/f/e/luna_points__by_shadow_eve-d4pak4u.png

this is good

and i don't mind the lack of clop

sometimes a good shipping fic is better than clop

you know what i mean bro?

and while Celestia hoped that there would never be a repeat of the night where Luna had decided to create a rather too realistic representation of her own behind, her skies were met with praise and appreciation by the populace.

HAWT!

what is love?

Image: http://i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/000/099/what-is-love-570898416.gif

this was the

best

thing

ever

for realsies

i loved it as much as your clop

i now remember why i followed you in the first place

>>535085535085

Someone needs to draw that.

>>535312535312 some one should

Adorabubble! A little short and perhaps rushed, but good nonetheless. Well deserving of a thumbs-up.

I D'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWW so hard at the end of this chapter!!!

I really like this, keep it up!

>>535320535320

I'm not that good at drawing anything but pixel art or I'd do it... I WILL ASK AROUND!!!

>>535367535367 send me a link if it ever gets done

i wana see it

I liked it. You keep it short and sweet, even when celestial goddesses are involved.

Quite the feat indeed.

So fave'd and thumbs up!

>>535373535373

Certainly, good sir!

>>535383535383 thank you friend

'Tia and Twily,

Sitting in a tree,

...

I really like this one - particularly Luna as matchmaker and jester.

The page seems to have eaten the accented e's in the word "café", though. Looks really weird.

every time I think of Celestia stifling a laugh I keep thinking of this picture

Image: http://images.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw246_celestia%20smirk.png

y the buck everyone always portray ponies as lesbians its dumb. id rather read something about straight ones honestly. Not sure if Hub ever goin to allow for sexual orientations of ponies to be different since we already know rarity is straight.

The star  message at the end-

"She dotted the i with a heart!? How barbaric!"

I lost my shit there.

You have proven yourself to be quite the talented writer. You don't need sex in your stories to be good. Most people who are good at clop can't write a clean story for crap. I tip my hat to you.

UH OH Celestia is turning into Molestia, but oh well it's getting good anyway so BRING IT ON!!!!!!

Featured Twilestia, marked for reading later, I don't really have the time right now

EDIT: Oh wow, that was awesome

It's good without clop.

I love "adorable hugging and stuff" fics.

Please please PLEASE include more snuggling, and omit clop.

Not that I don't like clop, but it's so dreadfully hard to find a good shipfic like this.

you used people,

Worse, some of her points contradicted others. Love can bloom between people with the same interests was the reverse of Opposites attract, but both had appeared in several works so far - sometimes both within the same work. To make it even more hopeless, those two weren't even the most contradictory. Love appeared to be more complex than Twilight had first assumed.

it was  good but celestia should of got twillight dehydraded and see what you write after that

Twily

Dude! totally loved this chapter. Almost died laughing at the end . Thats something I can totally see Luna doing too.

>>533302533302

Just the description (HA, horse sex) and this picture mean I have to read it.  I just hope the hilarity found in the description can continue.  

At first I thought:

"TAW with no clop? Not part of the norm, but Unchangeable is good, let's read!"

During I was all:

"Man, I love ships"

"Twilestia is my OTP"

"So. Many. Gigglefits."

After, I feel:

"Must have more!"

"Clop would be neat, but not absolutely necessary."

"Yup. TAW still rocks my socks."

Found a minor error: "You are an amazing person, Luna"

>>535806535806

I think the hub is avoiding romance altogether because if they are all straight they get criticism, and if some character's aren't they get criticism.

And with the M:F ratio, lesbian shipping is inevitable.

"a little later than planned, but still within acceptable tolerances"

Eeyup, that's Twilight all right.

More adorable hugging please!

That was freakin' amazing~!!!

Awesome. Cute. Awesomely cute.

>>533661533661 im sorry but

Image: http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/173/659/46183 - animated did_not_read_lol gif image_macro lol_didnt_read meme rainbow_dash tl%253Bdr.gif

adorable

God damn you TAW

Must you be so good at everything

X30,000

>>535806535806

Luckily, no one cares what you think about straight ponies and lesbians if they're reading a Twilestia shipfic. Also, mentioning the hub (who only air MLP, and have little to nothing to do with its creation), though I suppose you mean Hasbro, is pointless. No author EVER writes based on what they think Hasbro will allow into the show, it just kills creativity and makes their story seem like a sad attempt to get a job on the writing staff rather than writing for fun and their fans.

This out of the way...

TAW, this was fucking amazing. I want more. MORE. Twixie and Twiluna were my OTPs, once with a side of Twixiluna. But I think I might actually be falling in love with Twilestia now.

Which is odd that it's only happening now, as I'm an officer of the Solar Empire, and Celestia is my best pony. >_>

So sweet! So funny! and you blew my mind like four times! Hell you could have ended it right there and I would have been happy but NOOO.  you have another chapter of amazingness just waiting for me to read!  I applaud you and give you my thumbs, favs, and Internets.

>>536910536910

They use "people" in the show too, dude.

Well, I can see why you said you wanted my opinion. I find Twilight trying and failing to understand emotions adorkable at the worst of times. Having just re-read Love is Confusing this last week, I think I'm pretty well versed in Love for Science.

Twilight's characterization is pretty darn good. She's both a tad more naive then I present her, but a bit more practical. I like contrasting this against s1e1. Twi is asking to know about love instead of being forced, and it's looking like Celestia may be doing quite a bit of learning herself.

>Not Clop

I actually squeed a little. I really, really enjoy emotions and closeness. Good clop has some of this, but too often it gets lost (I find it usually ends up under the bed with the ball gag nopony remembers buying) or at least overshadowed. I have been craving some emotional closeness for a while, probably due to a lack of new pony episodes. I'm glad to see you apparently going to be focusing on the relationship and the feelings.

Princess Celestia's minor uncertainty here is great. I was a tad confused (disclaimer: it's 3:30am, I was awoken by a screaming child) at first when she completely 180-ed on Cadance/Cadence (Did we ever get and official-official spelling?).

I'm not saying don't go for sex if you feel it fits (hurr hurr), but I wouldn't mind it if stayed clean.

Onward!

>>537298537298

I switch between often, they seem to do so in the show as well. It makes sense to me that "person" is used too - they know lots of species, they'll need a word to describe just 'any' sapient being.

>>538140538140

Awesome, thank you <3

I don't think we've ever gotten an official spelling, and most of the semi-trustable sources like the wiki are... well, the wiki uses both, for example, so highly untrustworthy. If we ever get confirmation one way or the other I'll go through and fix things, but until then I just hope that nobody thinks it should be spelled the other way too strongly! The 180 was very sloppy, I agree, it was meant to be a "Of course I'll get her to help, oh except that means that I'm driving Twilight even further away from me" kind of thing, but rereading it that didn't come out at all. A shame.

And yes, I love emotions too - as backwards as it might seem that's why I actually ever started writing, because all of the clopfiction I was finding was just far too clinical and never focussed on what I was looking for - making ponies happy. I suppose things like this are the logical conclusion of that particular pathway. Maybe with a tad more drama and a tad less "oh everything just happened to fall into place perfectly" next time, but this was a test to see if people would like it, and apparently they do, so excellent.

Thanks for the words <3

Yay!

You've managed to write a Luna I don't hate!

Seriously, though. The desires she exhibits—wanting to help her sister, wanting to pull her own weight—felt natural enough. Celestia overburdening herself seems natural too, both because of her long solo-rulership and hiding from her feelings for Twilight.

I do love how your Twilight has no issue with levitating things, even Celestia. The image is hilarious and I can imagine an over-enthusiastic Twilight forgetting who she is doing that too. She may be a tad over-confident, but then we do have boast busters to play with too.

I'm not trying to nit pick errors or anything, but I'm not sure I can parse this:  >Twilight was not never late because she didn't know how to do it - she knew exactly how to do it, she simply chose not to.

Twilight wasn't ever late, not because she didn't know how to do it—she knew exactly how—but because she simply chose not to.

?

Anyway, I like the touch of prankster both Celestia and Luna have. I dislike "Trolestia" in serious fics, but I can totally buy into the Schemer!Celestia behind that. And she has completely caught herself up in her own trap.

The letters were very well done. Usually, people utterly fail to use diary or letters in a way that doesn't come off as convient exposition or info-dumping. You have just the right amount of brevity and conversational tone in them. The fact that they are commented on by Luna helps break up any sense of monotony there might be.

I really like how Celestia feels unable to stop Twilight from dating her. It's both comical and sweet as anything. Twilight's enthusiasm and the way she tries so very hard to make this work, even while not really understanding why, is smile inducing.

>That wasn't love, it was just admiration and respect.

You handled this very well. I really have nothing more I can say here. This approach is so very different than my own I can't really analyze it. So I'm just going to enjoy it.

Did Celestia just perform cutielingus on Twilight

>'Tia and Twily,

>Sitting in a tree,

My ego is obviously too big at this point. Imma go poke it with a stick 'til it deflates.

>>538181538181

Expect more words. I'm on chapter 3 now.

I totally agree with you on not enough emotional clop. So far, Bonds of Earth and Sky is the best one for actual closeness I've found. It'a amazing and good and I have read it way too many times. I like to think my own minor addition to pony clop was passonate, but I since I wrote it, it's really hard to read it without feeling really weird. I have no idea if you share that issue or not.

Be prepared for comments about how the ending needed to be longer.

I love epilogues that are epilogues and not just another chapter. The only thing I can really suggest here is to introduce and hammer on Luna's desire to do her royal duty a little more; make it an actual thread that needs to be resolved, albeit, a minor one. I see where you mentioned it, but it never felt like something that needed fixing, or rather, it seemed 'fixed' the moment Celestia gave Luna the reins for the night. If you could either reintroduce that minor conflict or have it seem less resolved, then this would be a perfect wrap up.

ps. I know I'm crazy, but the smile just because Twilight is coming to Canterlot is hotter than the kiss last chapter.

Faved (why did faves and tracks have to combine ) and thumbed and would recommend.

While I personally quite like the cloppy stuff this was certainly some good good good quality shipping and I love it.

Also the fact that it's Twilestia and I absolutely adore this shipping is helping, but that's beside the point!

Hmm yeah I'd go so far as to say it's better than most cloppy stuff (but don't stop writing that! It's good). Simply because while I like the sexy parts it just doesn't feel as good without a proper story backing it up. My only real gripe with this is that I wish it was longer, but that's because I liked reading it and want to read more but it's over and I should end probably end this sentence now.

Good job =)

>>538199538199

Indeed, I've always really liked Celestia as a more vulnerable person, even if she's fantastic at hiding it around 99.9% of people. Makes for a much more interesting character, imo, and while I took it a little further than "a little vulnerable" I hope it worked out as managing to make her semi-realistically cute!

I've always had a love of the "different" things in fantasy universes - the things that separate them from us - so magic is something I love to put to use. I'll admit I might maybe make Twilight a little stronger than she should be, but I generally justify that with a quick "uh it's set after the show I guess" so she can be a little more practised.

I agree that that sentence is awkward - some of that was intentional, but the intent clearly didn't actually come out. It was somewhat meant to be Twilight justifying an out-of-character action to herself even though she hadn't actually realised why she'd done it yet. Your rewording makes a lot more sense, but I think loses that - not, apparently, that it had it in the first place, so I may go back and edit that anyway.

Yeah, I've never really liked most of the fandom "Something-lestia"s - but I thought that given that she seems to plan everything in the show, combined with the more vulnerable side here, might end up in a completely failed plan like that, so yeah. Luna, I have no excuse for, I just wanted somebody Celestia would respect enough to listen to who could do the heavy lifting in forcing her into things - she's not particularly close to the in-show Luna, but on the other hand we only saw her being awkward, not how she would be with family, so... there are worse crimes, I fear.

I was really worried about the letters coming off as that, too. Originally I think they were, too much writing and not enough content, but I cut it back to the basics like they were just really quickly written letters shot back and forth over a day or so, and I think it turned out pretty okay.

The "unable to stop" thing was actually the original idea of the piece, I think its focus got lost somewhere along the lines, but the idea of Celestia accidentally teaching Twilight exactly how to get her into bed (metaphorically speaking) is pretty adorable!

>>538219538219

Yeah, I was in two minds about splitting the third chapter off at all, to be honest. It's not very long, but at the same time it's meant as a "hey everything worked out pretty okay in the end" kind of thing. Thinking about it, there's a lot I could have left open to make a sequel easier, and I probably should have - oh well, I guess. As it is, the epilogue doesn't really do much, I just didn't want to leave Celestia mad at Luna for something silly!

I love that this is some short and sweet Twilestia shipping.  Not everything needs to be pain and heartache and struggle, sometimes it's the little moments that define a pony.  Well done.

Will read later. Description combined with the comments I have read mark this as a good read, unfortunately have no time right now.

Loved it, a very sweet fic, and drunken Celestia is hilarious.

Suprised Device Heretic hasn't commented yet.

Dammit TAW, I have college. Stop distracting me with these awesome shipfics.

Yes, please. The world needs more Twilestia. I'm happy to report that your goal of writing a good romance story without smut was a success. The cuddles and hugs were a more than adequate substitute. :D

I really like how differently their relationship began here than in most stories. I think I read another comment desribe it as 'quiet'? That seems to fit rather well. It's a nice change of pace from the usual Twilestia fare (which isn't to say the usual fare isn't enjoyable :P).

I'm not sure if it's just my computer or not, 'cause nobody else seems to be mentioning it, but "cafe" appears twice in this chapter as "café" for me. And

even the strictest lecturer at one of her collages