Fellowship is Madness

by Imperator Chiashi Zane

Best Night Ever, Part 1

“Is everypony ready? Our chariot will be here soon!” Kajiik glanced around the room at his friends, three in dresses, one in full armor, and one wearing something that was half dress, half suit. He was garbed in a finely striped suit that blended to his fur neatly. He had to remember to get Rarity a nice souvenir from the Gala when they got there.

Fleethoof was bouncing around already, a loop of rope around her middle as Blueberry attempted to make her stop before she started sweating on her dress. Barkskin was fidgeting with her bracelets, even though Kajiik had helped her get them secured snuggly in place so they wouldn’t show any of the missing patches of fur.

Hammer and Iron were the only two who didn’t seem to be nervous about it, at least to Kajiik’s eyes. He had never seen the Guardspony so still, in fact. Even the flares of gold foil and spring-steel didn’t tremble a millimeter. Hammer, on the other hoof, moved in measured paths, not a single muscle movement out of place. Perfect poise, he thought. And yet he couldn’t remember her telling him where she had learned such control. Especially since Griffons weren’t known for their self-control.

He didn’t have any extra time to ponder the fact, because the airship carriage arrived with a resounding clank as the lift hit the dirt outside the tree. He had been sure the Princess would send an airship for them, she had implied as much in the letter, “Ok, everypony. Time to go. Mares first.”

Iron stood at full attention until the lift rose away with the four mares on it, then he dropped into his normal half-attention stance, “You think this night’s going to be alright?”

Kajiik smiled at his friend, “Oh, you know it’s going to be the Best Gala Ever. Right? We’re going with friends, so no more dancing by ourselves in the corner looking like idiots.”

Iron snorted a laugh, “This is gonna be good.”
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Iron Hoof stifled a snicker as he watched Hammer Soot pull out her hearing crystals and tuck them into her dress’s pouch. The others had started singing, led by, of course, Fleethoof. He hadn’t expected Kajiik to join in, but right now, he was making a valiant effort at a duet with Blueberry.

“All our dreams will come true, Right here at the Gala! At the Gala!” The two were tone deaf, and completely off key with Fleethoof, but somehow they managed to not make him cringe, “All our dreams and our hopes from now until hereafter! All that we’ve been wishing for will happen at the Gala! At the Gala!” Was that a wink at Hammer? Iron couldn’t tell, and he was certain that the Thestral, with her talons pressed into her ears, and her eye clamped shut, didn’t see it at all.

The airship came in for a soft landing, and Hammer hit the dirt just a moment before Iron could jump down, and scold her, as soon as she put her hearing crystals back in.
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“Princess! How wonderful to see you!”

“Kajiik, how wonderful to see you as well. How have your studies been?”

“Excellent. Oh, I’m so excited to be here! I haven’t seen you in so long!”

Princess Celestia sighed, “Kajiik, it’s been three months. Some of the ponies here haven’t seen me in years, if ever,” she shook her head, “I spoiled you, didn’t I?”

His head sagged towards the floor, “Yes Princess.”

Her hoof touched the back of his neck, “Well, what are you groveling for? We’ve got five thousand hooves to shake, and only eight hours to do it in.”

His head snapped up so fast that his neck popped as he settled into a position beside the Princess and held out a hoof. It was no secret that he was her prized pupil, at least, here in Canterlot, and as such, his hoof was as good as hers to the nobles that came to shake hooves with the highest of nobility.
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Fleethoof was practically vibrating with excitement. Or maybe it was the five slices of cake she had eaten. Probably the cake. Her eyes flicked back and forth, locking onto any particular stallion for a moment before getting distracted by another set of toned legs. Her white fur contrasted with the faded pink ruffles and gold trim on her dress as she moved around, hovering on her vibrating wings with almost no effort.
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Barkskin had slipped out the back, never really a fan of the huge crowds, out into the garden. The field covered in trees and grass, held only one other pony. The creature was indistinct in the darkness, but still clearly a pony, wearing some sort of draping garb that warped its shape. She couldn’t even identify the gender.

She approached slowly, quietly, wanting to relax away from the crowds, to mingle with the animals and watch the clouds up here, high above Canterlot.

“Maybe we’ll even catch my youngest star dancing in the sky, dear,” the words somehow bypassed Barkskin’s ears entirely, and she felt the distinct urge to vomit on the grass as the words settled into her brain like blood pudding and wood shavings.

“Did I…”

“Say that out loud? No. Yes. Maybe? The nature of reality is such sometimes. Especially around my wife’s son,” again the words just felt wrong as they appeared in her head without any of the mucking about in the space between the stallion and Barkskin. “I’m sorry, Barkskin. It was rude of me to not introduce myself. I am…” The string of sounds that came from the stallion left her retching into a rosebush, with her magic holding her mane back, “Sorry. My daughter-in-law just uses Really Fat Gran. I am alright with that moniker.”

She stared at him, “Really. Your name is Really?”

“That is the safest form of it for a mortal to use, yes.”

“Would you mind speaking to me normally?”

“I…Suppose.” The pressure in her brain lifted and the sound moved to her ears. It was still an uncomfortable voice, but it didn’t make her want to throw up again.

“Thank you.”
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Iron Hoof stood patiently in line with the other Guardsponies. It was his assigned place. Of course, every Guardspony would get a turn to dance, but right now it wasn’t his turn. He watched patiently as other ponies spun and twirled across the floor. He had been assigned first shift watch, one hour of standing watching the Princess and Kajiik shake everypony’s hooves as they entered. He smirked as he saw Kajiik’s face falling after a half hour, and over three hundred hooves shaken. He wasn’t going to be suffering the disgrace of that.
His turn slid up quickly though, and just in time, as he was starting to get bored watching Kajiik. Him and one of the other guards had taken to betting on the direction the shakes would go. So far, he was winning five to one. They were betting something he hadn’t quite heard before he shook on it, so he was glad he was winning. At least, until his shift was relieved and he found himself being tackled to the ground by another guardspony in light armor. He knew it was the one he had been betting with, but couldn’t identify who it was, until she raised her helmet. Her face hadn’t changed since Basic training, and the chip in her ear that had been hidden by the armor’s enchantment made it clear exactly who it was.

“Longbow? I thought you were out on the border!”

“Yet you bet me a makeout session, and you won.” He swallowed as the olive colored Pegasus moved closer, stalking him like he was some sort of food, “So that means you get to kiss me five times, and I get to kiss you once.” Another gulp, and he instinctively checked the latches on his helmet. She knew exactly who was under the armor, even though the enchantments were supposed to hide a pony’s identity. It was her special talent, True Sight the Unicorns called it. And she wasn’t going to let him get away. There would be no blending into the crowd and escaping. Instead, he opened his visor and tensed up.

“Fine,” he remembered how voracious she had been in Basic, and she hadn’t let up for a moment, unless she was ordered to. She was, at least, good at following orders, “Take your prize. But I’m trading mine in for dances instead.”

She leapt at him, knocking him to the floor and rolling under a table, lips locked to his.
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Blueberry danced, her body moving with the music, though she wasn’t really putting her all into it. She was listening for the band to start on a tune that would suit her presentation. It simply wasn’t coming, not from these slow orchestral ponies. That simply would not do. To her amusement though, she saw a white Unicorn mare with shocking blue spikes for a mane, garbed in a Neo-Steam styled dress awash with glowing wires, lean in and whisper in the ear of the stallion waving the conductor’s wand. Or maybe it wasn’t a whisper, judging by his reaction. Nevertheless, he seemed to have gotten a suggestion from her. Or maybe it was the lewd action she made towards the Bass player that gave him the idea to switch up the beat.

Rock music began, wafting out of the speakers, slowly picking up speed. It quickly became clear what track was playing. Enter Sandmare, by Maretallica. Blueberry stretched out away from her dance partner, a stallion whose name she hadn’t asked, and didn’t care. She was on a mission now. Her ears flitted to the music as she spun on her hind legs, mere centimeters from falling over. She twirled, leapt, and flitted about, wingless, like a dancer on a cloud. The song hit the crescendo, and she leapt far higher than any sane Unicorn would over a tile floor. Fire streamed out of the slits in the back of her dress, unfurling into her wings. She spun slowly, wings cupping the air as the track spun into another chorus.
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Hammer was starting to grow bored when the music started pounding. Immediately, her ears perked up and she snapped to attention, heart pounding to the beat. Her wings flared out, baring the black streaks of her True Steel for the sun, and everypony in the room to see. Her skirt flared out as her talons spread and reflected the light in the room like a pair of bronze disco balls. The beat dropped off and the bellow of a new beat rang out. A cackle that made several of the more noble ponies lunge to the floor at the shout of ‘All Aboard’ just made her laugh and roll in the air, sliding into a smooth twirl across from her friends. Her, Blueberry, and Fleethoof formed a perfect triangle, spinning slowly to the beat, heads bobbing in time to the music. That track ended and a new one folded into the air with a beating sound. Hooves stamped from all the ponies who recognized it, including a number of Guardsponies.

Even Iron Hoof and his dance partner stomped to the beat of King’s ‘We are the Champions’. At least until Princess Celestia stepped up to the stage and stopped the music with a burst of yellow.

”Everypony, thank you for coming to the Grand Galloping Gala!” she smiled softly, hiding humorous thoughts of the nobles panicking over the modern music. She herself had considered ducking for cover at the witch-like cackle of one track. Fortunately, a hoof from her student kept her upright and noble. ”Tonight is especially unique, more than just the wonderful playlist. Tonight, I would like to introduce my Elements of Harmony!”

Iron Hoof pulled away from Longbow and galloped up to the stage to stand with Kajiik and Barkskin, who had just come in from the field. Hammer settled carefully atop Iron’s back as Blueberry and Fleethoof settled onto the other two.

Author's Note:

Songs used in this chapter:

Comments

[nightwalker]

Given you have an orchestra preforming, here's a more appropriate version of Enter Sandman.

I love the S&M album.

[Imperator Chiashi Zane]

6034749 Nice. Thanks.