This story is a sequel to Hey Batty, Batty
It's been a great 3 years with your girlfriend but when someone you not taking a liking gets involved in your relationship you slowly start to get fed up.
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Editor/Proofreader - roker12
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Drama!
Okay three theories:
1) Night Watch is cheating on him
2) She is meeting her idol again and/or is getting the opportunity to be trained by her
3) She is going to become Luna's personal guard
*dramatic music plays*
DUN DUNN DUNNNNNNN!
Also, don't forget punctuation and periods at the ends of sentences!
so little errors o. o
I couldn't help my self
get needs an s
don't need the to
I should be It unless Cass was really cute to see Night Watch
Should be She's
start should be either starts or started, or pancake should be pancakes
Any one correct me if I is wrong.
Hopefully Cass can figure this problem out before somepony ends up with a few missing teeth!
cant wait for chap 2 ;D
Why are all men (I'm a male too) this stupid when it comes to misunderstanding something?
The gaps in the sentence "we" overheard should tell "us" that "we" are missing some very key words.
Either that, or the Author is just screwing with our minds...
Already off to a brilliant start, well done comrade
5194616 no sarcasm here mate
I was seeing if someone would correct me
Can't wait until the next chapter! I'm loving this story
Well... That's not good...
Great chapter/cliffhanger.
Oopsy...
Great chapter!!!
O.O
memecreator.eu/media/created/nxcp1c.jpg
I wonder who this stalker is, Mabey the captain? Idk but great chapter, can't wait until the next one!
5403202
hue hue hue. you’ll never knoooooooow
not bad
5190602
i like it how on that first you YOU screw’d it up xD
When are you going to continue?!
I can't wait for the next part
Moon is still an ass. Kick the bastard out. Just causing stress where it isn't needed.
If you need to know something about me, it's that I believe that the headbutt is the most anger induced attack in existence......This motherfucker would have gotten the hardest fucking headbutt in all of nocturne!!!!!
Really happy to see another chapter of this story again, and also, Moon Side is such a asshole, but I like where this story is going, can't wait to see the next chapter
My character is dangerous so it fits me.
Can't wait for next chapter!
Fatality!!
More
One more chapter? Please?
Well.
I'm glad this story is back. I still think you could use an extra editor or proofreader. I could do so for you if you'd like, cause I tend to notice most of them. Emphasis on MOST. Some will probably slip by me.
ANYWAYS, on the story... man. Moon is an ass. I don't see why this would completely ruin a relationship though. Maybe he just didn't want to talk about it. And like he said, he did his time for it, so I really don't think this should have as big of an impact as you're making it out to be.
OMG!!!!!!!!
And new chapter hype
This guy.... well I'm happy to see this story agian
What I rather murder someone then knotting someone out.
So... "we" did time for assault... interesting...
You have got to write more soon, you can't just leave this like it is for as long as last chapter, I beg of you.
Happy to see you updated this story and I am eager to see Night Watchs reaction to all of this info.
Moon needs a kick in the groin for being a dick.
NEWWW CHAPPPTTERRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YAY! NEW CHAPTER. I like this story, I've been watching it for months and I'm glad it's not dead.
Now that I've said that, I would like to address a problem I have with this. The "villain", Moon Side, is clearly a jerk that the audience is supposed to hate to the point where we'll cheer if his house burns down. We are told in no uncertain terms that we are to hate him and the hate comments about him are proof you succeeded.
I HATE it when authors do that.
It makes the antagonist shallow and poorly characterized which, consequentially, takes away from the story as a whole.
Another problem I have (once again with villain characterization) is that I'm having trouble detecting Moon Side's motives. Is he trying to ruin Cass and Night Watch's relationship so that he can have her for himself (which has been hinted at in the last few chapters)? If so, why is he being so upfront and mean about it? What he has done is more geared towards destroying the relationship between Night Watch and Cass in order to hurt Cass, not get the girl.
*cough cough* they're going to break up *cough*
God the feels!!
Ah shit it's getting good I can't wait for the next chapter
It lives!!!
*sees smug ass, coniving guard, who was probably from a noble family* you mother bucking... *sigh* I want to send him to Tartarus
LE GASP, IT LIVES!
Well that's understandable. I'm on the same page as you are.
Thought :U
idiot :v
Those are what I caught. Yay it alive :V
I read School! Flying! Falling! Goofing! but kind of fell out of it.