"What's the one thing everypony wants?"
Twilight doesn't really know how to answer that question. Luckily, her mentor is willing to help.
Chapters (1)
Mane O War
Joined 2nd Dec, 2013 ·
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4879339
Aw, thanks, man. I try my best.
Sex.Love.Oh my god everyone is a changeling!
4879434
Hmm... not sure how I feel about Twilight's parents being more "Honey-Boo-Boo" than intellectual and caring... but aside from that, this was a fantastic little tale. Heartwarming as hell, and very well written.
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4879755
Thanks, man! I suppose we all have different headcanons and stuff. But, thank you very much!
I see a glaring writing mistake, which I must correct for you,
When using an apostrophe, (') using it in plurals is entirely unnecessary. the apostrophe is a character used for possessives.
Instead of "family's", use "families".
In other nitpicks, why exactly do Twilight's parents not care for her or her brother? These sorts of things should be explained within the story, in order to not confuse your readers.
And not as important, but you've triggered a pet peeve of mine. I've never considered Celestia as a goddess, because it's clear that she is not perfect. That's just me, though.
D'awww
4880931
Thanks for the corrections, sir, I'll shall fix it right away. I appreciate the help and feedback.
Wait a minute, is that a 'The walking dead season 2' (the game) reference.
4883980
Eeyup! Nice job, I'm glad somebody got the reference!
4880931
As for the "why they don't care", since the statement comes from a young Twilight, I interpret it as "Twilight's in a bad place emotionally and her folks have been distant lately and she's been reading too many psychology books". Given that - all of which is established in story - we can see Twilight seeing things that way even when it isn't, leading her to seeking comfort from Celestia.
What I thought of when I saw this story's title:
Not a bad story, though I think the whole "Twilight's parents are jerks" is kinda jarring and not really what's been shown, and it kinda ruins the mimesis. But it kinda works within the story.
A thumbs-up for you. Also Bruce Campbell, and we all know that's worth far, far more.
4884652
Thanks for the thumbs-up and Bruce Campbell. It's very much appreciated!
For you to condense so much daw and heartwarming into such a small space is commendable.
While it dose seem a bit description-bare it is understandable, as you aren't using scenery or introspection as the main carrier for emotion but the dialogue itself. (As far as I see it.)
Good job.
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4887109
Aw, thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Lovely!
4888178
Thank you!
I seem to come across a lot of stories where one or more of Twilight's parents are kind of jerks or described as jerks.
Um. Wow. Okay. No. Just...no.
4908996
Odd. I often run into stories where Twi's parents are awesome. Seems like we're on opposite ends of the spectrum, huh?
4937701 Seems so. Immediate example that comes to mind is Twilight's racist mom on Ascend.
Have to say, you through me for a bit of a loop when you portrayed Twilight's parents as unfeeling bastards. I wasn't angered, but that's a fairly uncommon interpretation. But other than that, that was a pretty touching fic; it at least gives Celestia a deeper connection to Twilight than the show portrays, but isn't outside the zones of belief. Extra points for taking a short-short story to it's logical conclusion and using every word to build up character. Liked and Favorited.
5070699
Same here. About Twilight's parents I mean.