Friday, Night, and Twilight
Ponyville is quiet at night. Really quiet. In a world with no TV or radio you’d think there’d be more of a night life. It’s only a little after eight and there’s nobody on the streets except for me. The only signs of life are flickering lights in a few of the houses. I should come out at night more often.
It’ll take a few minutes to walk across town, and that’s okay. Rare moments like these, when one neon-hued horse or other isn’t sticking their nose in my face, give me a chance to think. For once nobody is going to ask why I’m walking funny, and by funny I mean periodically tripping over one of my own back legs. If they’d spent a couple decades balanced on two legs instead of four they’d understand what I’m going through.
It’s not all bad, though. I don’t want to give that impression. I don’t have student loans or a dead end job anymore, which almost makes the lack of thumbs worth it. The whole cancer thing tips the scales, of course. Just before Twilight officially lost permission to visit Earth, she brought back a few printouts from medical websites on cancer warning signs. I know she wanted to prove to me that she did the right thing, although right now I wish she’d skipped the medical stuff and bought me one last bacon double cheeseburger.
I’ve been here for about three weeks and I still keep thinking about meat. Ponies have some amazing ways to dress up hay and vegetables, but in the end it just isn’t the same. Not that I have much of a choice; even if I did have a cheeseburger in front of me right now, my stomach couldn’t digest it.
Still, it isn’t all bad. I know I keep saying that, but it’s true. Twilight inadvertently gave my life just what it needed: a full reset. So what if it came with a cutie mark—which happens to be a paper with writing on it, by the way. I have a job as Cheerilee’s teaching assistant and, in around six months, her substitute while she goes on maternity leave. All the kids still call her ‘Miss’, even though she’s been married to Big Mac for nearly a year. Working with kids is kind of fun, even if they are four legged. I didn’t expect to enjoy teaching, and if I’d continued to ignore Twilight’s advice about taking more English classes I probably wouldn’t have ever found out.
Another plus is, ironically enough, friendship. When it comes to social interaction, nothing motivates like taking away the internet. I hang out with Twilight and her friends quite a bit, along with some other ponies that aren’t seen on the show very much. The biggest difference between watching Ponyville and living in it is timing; crazy things happen once in a while, but the average day isn’t a gag-a-minute mess. My life is peaceful and, amazingly enough, happy. Twilight’s the main reason for the latter.
My walk ends at, to put it mildly, the biggest and gaudiest building in town. After seeing Twilight’s castle in person, I’m convinced the Tree of Harmony was just playing a practical joke on her. Compared to the other buildings this thing is a skyscraper; a crystalline purple one at that. In any case, I thump a hoof on the door and wait.
Two seconds later the door opens and Twilight grins at me. “You’re right on time.”
Being at eye level with her is perception-altering in ways I can’t describe, possibly even more than changing species. “May I come in?”
She raises an eyebrow. “Are you trying to be chivalrous or something? Where’s my sarcastic, transmuted human?”
“I’m just being polite, I figured it might rub off on you.”
She smirks and the door swings wide open. “Oh get in here already, I’ve got a surprise for you.”
Thankfully the interior decor is a little more subtle, which I’d imagine is Rarity’s doing. We walk down one of the many long hallways and eventually reach what Pinkie calls the ‘party room’. I’m not sure how this room is more party-worthy than any of the hundreds of others just like it, but that’s what we’ve all taken to calling it. There are always at least fifty balloons and streamers in here, and the banner reading “Welcome to Ponyville, Jake” has turned into a permanent fixture.
She runs into the middle of the room and turns back to face me. “Surprise.”
“So where is everyone?”
“Pony.”
“Fine, everypony. Where are they? You said we were having a get-together tonight.”
“We are. I even invited your favorite princess.”
My automatic reaction is to duck. “Where is she?”
She laughs are rolls her eyes. “Not Celestia, I was being serious. Besides, wasn’t she nice to you at the gala last weekend?”
“It takes a whole lot of nice to balance out the whole ‘be a jerk and I’ll send you to hell’ speech.”
“I told you she was just being overprotective. You should’ve heard what she said to Shining Armor just before his wedding. Anyway, so who’s your favorite princess?”
She bats her eyes at me.
I grin. “Luna.”
A balloon flies down from the ceiling and bops me on the head. “Try again.”
I can’t match that assault. So far my best magic trick is giving myself a headache.
She takes a few steps closer to me. “Don’t you remember what my invitation said?”
“Twilight’s Castle, Friday, quarter past eigh… oh.”
“Don’t tell me you forgot our old schedule already.”
“Last I checked our old schedule was also every other week. We see each other almost every day.”
“We do things with our friends, go on an occasional adventure … but we don’t have time like this anymore where it’s just you and me.”
“We don’t have a TV either.”
“I do have a couch, a bowl full of apples, and some cider. We can even sing that annoying theme song if it’ll make you feel more at home.”
“Couldn’t we just skip to the part where we talk?”
She’s been inching closer to me this whole time. At this point we’re nose to nose, staring directly into each other’s eyes. “Sounds wonderful.”
“Is this is all going to show up on TV?”
She leans in a half inch and kisses me. “With what I have to say? Not a chance.”
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Awww shit here it comes, twi's puttin the moves on him
So, you plan to continue or is this only some epilogue?
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/263/915/292.png
Huh I thought this was complete, but I love this extra chapter so that's a nice surprise. Also is there going to be anymore? I could see this turning into a sequel pretty easily.
Ah, so this is the remade version of the epilogue if I remember correctly.
Uh oh, it looks like all the comments posted to the old, deleted version of this chapter are gone... ew.
I got the notification that BlazingInferno replied to a comment that I made and I can't find either... I assume it was "great idea, I'll delete and repost it so everyone can see it in their favorites". I just don't know what went wrong!
A sequel of this would make this a HiE cliché story; unless, the author get genious and writes something original that can mantain the esscence of this story.
To quote the game GTA 4:
"There's no such thing as a fresh start. The longer you go on, you pick up baggage that you carry with you for the rest of your life."
To all those who think that their lives would be overall happier if they lived in Equestria, here's a brief reality check: Humans each have their own "happiness equilibrium". No matter what happens to change your life, you will eventually reach, and stay at your happiness equilibrium. Tomorrow, you could either win the lottery, or break the base of your spine, crippling you for life, and while you would feel very happy or very depressed initially, you would eventually become just as happy as you have always been, since your standards of living would go up or down depending on the circumstances.
So, while living in Equestria might be awesome for a few months or so, eventually, it would feel no different than how you live now.
4937342
4937361
For now this is it, I just wanted to redo how the ending was written. I don't plan on starting this up again for the next season, but anything could happen I guess. Right now I have lots of other ideas demanding to be written.
4937355
Amen.
4937416 Well it depends on the person as well. Some will get bored after a while. But others may enjoy it depending on how they were treated in their old life compared to their new one.
And....it now dies a comfortable death having lived a long and filling life. ...The story, that is.
4937507
Indeed, they will enjoy it for a time, but then their standards of enjoyment will increase as time passes, and they will return to their equilibrium.
4937408
Yeah, wish that hadn't happened
Naw, some more romance in the show would be nice
4937548 Yeah. Though as the saying goes "Happiness is what you make it"
4937416
Yes, although in the long term people's perceptions of their circumstances change. If the person changes (and we all do all the time), the same life can seem better or worse.
In Jake's case I think he's currently appreciating not being in the hole he'd dug for himself anymore. It's entirely possible that he'll just dig himself another one.
Why exactly? I know most people are against open borders, and a lot of people are in favor of tariffs, but countries actually hiding their existence from each other is a little extreme.
That's what it motivates you to do? The internet is going to stay taken away with that attitude.
Much better than the last chapter.
Hell it could have replaced it.
8/10
Nitpicks:
latter
I would say "more so", but I'm not entirely sure that isn't merely personal preference. Pretty sure, though. Unless you mean "more ways".
4937763
Thanks for pointing those out. I fixed the first and, as for the second, I'm not sure if there's a grammatical issue there or not.
4937778 Sequel Please
That was a cute ending. Well done.
Don't see much of a difference. Outcome is still the same.
not with what she has to say?... http://farm5.staticflickr.com/4152/5062627393_04000fb1dd_z.jpg
4937611 I know this isn't needed per say but... well I was wondering if you could tell us how the medical team and police reacted when they finaly found his human body and the bloody hoof prints twilight left in the place.
4938258 it wasn't meant to change the outcome, just give a more story driven ending instead of an ending that just says this happened the end.
4938317
That's a good question.... My thought is that when the autopsy results came back they wouldn't care about the oddities of the scene (hoof prints, purple hair on the couch, etc) too much. How he apparently died of natural causes is very open and shut, and in sure the police and paramedics have seen much weirder stuff.
If I ever write more about these characters that'd be fun to explore. So far no one's mentioned what I think is the oddest thing about the crime scene.
I like this ending way more than the other one. It feels more...similar to the rest of the story than the other epilogue did. It shares the same format as the other chapters, Jake thinks to himself, brings the reader up to speed on events that happen off screen, meets with Twilight, and then they talk. It's a simple format, but you make it work so well in this story.
I'm glad you went back and rewrote the epilogue, the original didn't seem to fit. It's also nice to see that you acknowledged that you could have written it better, and then went ahead and did! That speaks loads about an author and the care they have for their work.
4938495 that he tables is smashed and his body is pierced with glass but he body is in a different spot? in the room?
4938675
Something in the room
4938715 oh the zapp apples? oh i forgot about those.
4938855
That's the first time anybody's ever remembered (or at least mentioned in a comment)
4938892 hmm, they would probably think they are painted at first.. hehehe
I can just imagine someone trying to wash them and find it isn't paint.
twilight.ponychan.net/chan/arch/src/130924023266.jpg
I gotta say, this is an amazing end, to an excellent story. You done good, sir, I thank you.
4937328
In the words of Jake: I'm still surprised she knew of some moves to make
Hmmm...
Adding on to this, are we?
~Skeeter The Lurker
4939362 not quite
4939362
Just the rewrite I mentioned in my blog. Same ending content conveyed with fancy new words
4939450
Ah, ok. I see now.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Please tell me there's another story coming out
4938952
you think anyone would be brave enough to eat it? Aren't zap apples high in magical content? What do you think it would do to them? ... I think we just found our sequel.
4941018
brave enough not really....
stupid enough? one word. "Human"
what would happen?
gain powers?
turn into a pony?
gain rainbow hair/skin?
cure all illnesses?
open a portal to equestria?
implode?
4941070
Well, brave or stupid I guess. It would still make for an interesting story. I'd read it.
4941070
4941018
My first thought was "their head would explode. I think we just found an alternate ending"
4941085
probably not, but it would be funny.
do you think that mentioning zap apples would be enough connection to the show to get a short one shot about that through?
More??? Please???
A bit better than the last epilouge, but still falls short for me. Skipping off into flowers and sunshine without a single regret doesn't sit right no matter how you dress it. At least in this version he doesn't seem a bit brainwashed.
not bad