Whoa, 10,000 views? On a one-shot? Thanks for all the support! Also, thanks to viewers for featuring this on /mlpchan and Pastebin! ...I guess.
"Hello. My name is Fluttershy. I am a shy young pegasus mare, and also the bearer of the Element of Kindness. And, unknown to others, I am a fairly good writer. My shyness does not show on paper, as you can probably see."
"I am sitting here right now with my new foals, Butterscotch and Rosebud. They are nursing right now, but that is beside the point. I’m here to tell you the story about how they came into the world."
Follow Fluttershy as she takes you through the hilarious and touching story of the birth of her two foals! Eight and a half months of denial, and now it's getting really difficult for her to hide her condition. How are Twilight and her friends going to find out?
4/20/23 - Happy 9th birthday, Butterscotch and Rosebud!
Wow... I... Ok.
Have a thumbs up
Who is the foal's father?
Yea...well then...that was...interesting...never really read anything like it... •////•
And I thought it was good. A like and a fave for you
I agree with bubblybubbles. Who is the father? Rainbow Dash would definitely hunt him down for abandoning her friend. Cowardly thing to do.
I don't see what is messed up about it. I think it's a nice story. Silly but what the hay.
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Ya know, I never really took the time to sit and think about that one. Figured it'd be best left in the reader's imagination.
This was cute as fuck
some of the characters made odd decisions, but overall they weren't out of character
I enjoyed it
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Thanks, man!
Oh man...a comment from Regidar...holy shit!
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Man I don't know why nobody has submitted this yet it's written so well. Loved it. These kinds of stories are my favorite and you did an excellent job.
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th01.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/f/2012/228/e/2/fluttershy_blushing_by_nerdirockstar-d4x81j3.png
Gotta love this
Its so beautiful
*sniff*
4277438 oh please, I'm nothing special
This was a very adorable story. I love how you did it from Fluttershy's perspective and that you gave her speech some more color than what we usually hear in the show. Doing a Fluttershy perspective is not easy, but I personally think her use of language is much more eloquent and prolific when being put on paper, rather than coming from her mouth. And that cover picture; I remember seeing it from a rather depressing comic, but pregnant Fluttershy is so cute!
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I kinda stole the image from that comic. Took a bit of cropping and Paint editing to get it to that point.
Thank you, though!
She should have knocked over the water, say " Oh, no I spilled my drink, let me get some napkins," Got up, and walked/ran out the door.
ouch, that hurts a reputation
I've heard of women finding out about their pregnancies during labour... but they were actually FAT before the conception, even to the point where the people closest to them wouldn't notice much of a difference
Now this situation here... oh gosh, Fluttershy's friends sure had been channelling some ridiculous levels of obliviousness for more than half a year
Anyway, I enjoyed reading this
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Well, that's good, because I enjoyed writing it. Probably one of my best ideas.
Through out the story I kept shouting at the others. How could they not know, but everyone else knows. You got a like ane favorite from me.
Pinkie Pie and her one line. I just wanted to slap her... even though she is my favorite pony.
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I have a tough time characterizing Pinkie and Applejack. Those two are the ones I tend to shun a bit. Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity are my favorites, so they receive my attention most of the time.
4938226 No, I think her line was perfect for her!
Pinkie Pie always says things that juat makes you facehoof... hard.
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Sorry for remaining silent on this comment. I meant to respond to it a long time ago.
As it says in the story, Fluttershy was not aware of what was happening until it was too late. Let me post a quote:
According to the story, Fluttershy didn't know where the moisture on the seat was coming from until she was hit by a contraction. By then, any chances of masking her condition were gone. Does that make any sense?
Oh, this was really cute to read, though near the end I think it could have been done a little better. Flushed out more, touching the character interactions a little more, just needs a little more love and tender care to make it really stand out in my opinion. So, it's an average fanfiction one-shot, but enjoyable to read and it made me stand up several times to spin around... Take that as a compliment, means you've gotten my imagination flowing and when that happens I just need to... spin. I give it three mustaches out of five. :)
Quaver Ava
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Fair enough. All that is is something that I can improve on. No massive trip-ups that totally butcher me as a writer.
I got the majority of the mustaches, so I'll take what I can get!
Oh my, this was amazing, a really cute and absolutely adorable one-shot. It was both well written and very enjoyable to read, and now, dear author, you've earned another fav and follower.
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I luv it
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I'm glad!
Oh wow. This is beautiful. I am truely touched by this. It's this kind of writing that I crave. Thank you.
ayyy lmao
(i have nothing original to say dont kill meh pls ;_;)
I do have some feedback, although you shouldn't trust me on that. The story pacing is good, doesn't go too fast. However, there a lot of unnecessary line breaks, which I find quite strange. The story does create an emotional response (to most people) for the reader, which I quite like. Making it twice as long as the 1st chapter is weird, because it's more of a epilogue type of chapter, but I won't judge you too much.
Fluttershy's choice of wording I find more mature than she was before, but for the sake of the story, and since Fluttershy just gave birth to 2 foals, I won't disagree on it. She just isn't as shy as she was before. The wording for her thoughts, when the girls question her about the father, it makes a separate feeling of uncertainty, which is nice.
Overall, the chapter was a nice addition to the original story, and I throughly enjoyed it.
(I'm not that good at writing myself, so I can't judge much)
I really like this. Though Dash made me a bit mad in the bathroom scene, and Pinkie with her outburst. And the question of who their father is is really chewing at my mind.
But this was sweet.
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The foals' father is meant to be a mystery. I usually just leave it up to the reader's own headcanon.
5886090 I know it is, but it's chewing at my mind... for some reason I'm thinking Caramel... because of Butterscotch's coat
After much deliberation, Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity, figured out who the father was and what he did. The stallion was never heard from, ever, again.
There minor minor thing you may want to edit in this otherwise great chapter.
That should probably be "my".
Kind of want to read more, but it's probably for the best.
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I got the idea to write a bonus chapter for this back around mid-March, which was just recently. I figured, on the story's one-year anniversary, it would be a cool little addition to Fluttershy's story. As an original one-shot, though, I cannot bring myself to extend this fic any further. I am glad that you enjoyed it, though!
This is one of the sweetest things I've ever read! Daaaaaaw!
Also,
I didn't realise that Rosebud was a kiwi!
By kiwi I mean New Zealander don't take offence I am a kiwi sorry I felt compelled to.
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Glad you liked. Always makes me feel needed.
I love what you did for Fluttershy's signature! This story is so adorable!
Thank you so much for this!
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Aw, shucks. It was nothing, really.
Wow, this is really good! Go Flutters!
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Glad you enjoyed.
6384838 were did you get your inspiration?
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My weird mind, I suppose. Fluttershy's my favorite character, so most of my stories' plots are centered around her. Nothing in particular spurred this idea on me. It was...just a shower thought, I suppose.
6385225 wow, I wish I thought like that...
GOSH THIS NEEDS TO BE PUBLISHED THIS IS THE BEST FANFIC EVER IN ALL HISTORY OF FANFICS!!!!! It is loving, adorable , touching and PLAIN AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for writing this and i look forward to more of your fanfics!!!!
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Glad it pleased you.