She's looking at you. Yes you. And she is judging you with her eyes. There is no escape.
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Screwloose, the notoriously screwy pony, has been getting better. She's been seeing a therapist, Dr. Hornwinkle, and he is pleased with her progress. She has been building relationships, fitting in, attending therapy sessions regularly, and speaking pony-speak instead of barking.
Dr. Hornwinkle suggests during one session that she tries dating, to see if she can finally integrate into pony society.
Alas, the pressure is too much and Screwloose suffers a bit of a relapse.
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I like how you're portraying her, and oddly she reminds me of one of my friends.
I really like the plot of the story. You really make her sound sweet and likeable!
I loved that story sooooo much! Very clever idea!
This is a very interesting read. Maybe moar please?
4191991
Moar added.
Awwww. Nice updating speed BTW.
i have to admit that the plot is really nice. I like the idea and somehow i think she is somehow sweet in her way, a little bit helpless.
I think youre main story is another but i would like to read from time to time more of this one, maybe you can make this story a few chapter´s long.
Every time you could maybe ad more things like new friends and how she is becoming more normal in some way.
I make it one of my favourite story even if i am not know what is comming next
Hrmph. I just realised the chapter size keeps going up with each chapter. I suppose I'll have to keep that trend going.
This story seems to be just telling it self.
4199398
Oh dear... You've caught that malady as well? My own writings have been afflicted rather horribly. If you look you'll see the horrid 20k word chapters that await you if you do not find a cure!
This is the first time in a long time where I am reading a story and thinking: "well, this is different." It has certainly grabbed my attention.
4199775
Says incomplete on my screen. How odd.
4199781
Yeah, it does. I thought it said complete when I started reading, but I must be wrong.
4199792
I'm rather glad I grabbed your attention. Thank you so much for the compliment.
At first i don´t know about the diamond dog, because i don´t really like them but he seems to be nice enough.
The progress Screwloose make is really interessting and i enjoyed reading it.
It seems nothing wrong with it. I like it
I really like the whole idea, i am sure it be an stay definitely in my favourites. I like it if poeple or ponie´s like these are happy together and having fun^^
Hmmm not to much and not to less about the toilet thing. A little bit mad mare could be funny maybe.
4205200
That's a meaty marinara. Spicy no?
that chapter is all right, and because Mint is so full love, it is all right for her to be that way and dream of a threesome suddenly
I like it somehow, the whole thing with the concert. I do love all new experience screwloose make i think
Poor Fleagle and Screwloose.
“I thought Dr. Hornwinkle and others wanted to help me get better. This is confusing. Screwloose said, her face contorting with facial tics.
you forgot a " at the end there.
but I must say I am loving this story more then I thought I would, please keep it up.
4208794
Thanks, fixed!
Yowza!
AWESOMESTORY!!! YAYYYYYY!! MOOOOOOOOORE!
OH GOD the electroshock is why she has that tick.
4216051
Yeah. Permanent nerve damage can most certainly happen after prolonged exposure.
Edit. Specifically, it can cause neuropathy and a number of palsy like symptoms. It can also lead to dementia, caused by nerve trunks popping like popcorn in the brain. Horrible thing to do to somebody.
I can't put into words just how much I've enjoyed this story thus far. It has made me happy, sad, extremely angry...Ahhh!
God, how I love this.
I've liked and faved so I can keep up with it. This is just seriously too damned good not to keep going. I'm also gonna follow you, and check out your other stuff.
I eagerly await more.
awww i know there have to be at least one bad moment, but lucky there are more ponies like Pinkie Rarity and they maybe help them in the future chapters
Well this would be an interessting chapter if screwloose really lost maybe even only parts of her memories. I would like to see her friends to help her with her memories, but i let it be a suprise for me
I think i don´t want this to and but even more i want the to be happy, i like the story very much. I thougth about the Doctor as a bad pony befor.
Well good work
Did she tell them what theyre tried to do to her?
Nice Chapter
Is the story over now?
4219322
For now, it may continue later.
With puppies.
4219366
4219372
For all you know, she may still be in the asylum, drooling away, dreaming about this mad chaotic ending.
4219379 You had to say that? You had to?
Hmm.
The story can definitely be divided into two parts. Before and after Screw Loose´s abduction. It starts out as a bit of fluff, sort off. Then it makes somewhat of a 180. This isn't bad really, It just sort of goes in a different direction then some readers might expect from the beginning. Of course, there are signs right away, so looking back its no that surprising.
I do wonder a bit about how much power doctor whatshisname has here. As fas as I can tell, Screw Loose is no danger to anyone (not even herself), so it seems a bit odd the doctor can basically overrule her on anything she says or wants. The most likely explanation is that her guardians allowed that, but I assume she is an adult as the story starts, so even then that should no longer be possible.
The final chapter is a bit... Out of left field, really. I'm not sure how I feel about it. Its definitely nothing like I expected it to end when I started reading. I think, for me, its all a bit too much. The whole doctor having too much power thing is always a bit distracting, and with everything else that happens for me, the focus goes away a bit too much from Fleagle an Screw Loose. That is where the charm was for me in this story. There isn't much of a sense of satisfaction either when it comes to the doctor, and you are left with a lot of questions about Screw Loose her past.
Again, none of this (except maybe the power of the doctor, I personally do feel that could do with a bit more of an explanation) is necessarily bad, and I am sure there will be plenty of people who enjoy this as it is, and who would enjoy it less if it as different. Its personal preference in the end. All in all, I enjoyed the story enough, but for me personally this might not have been the best ending.
4219459
Equestria vs earth and doctors powers.
A long time ago, a housewife could be lobotomised for refusing to clean her house if her husband told her to do so. Things changed. Homosexuals were confined to mental institutions. A lot of psychologists still consider homosexuality a mental illness and will actually take steps to treat it.
The ending is ambiguous intentionally.
4219472
Hmm hmm. I guess I just can't really see Equestria as fitting with "A long time ago" Earth. We may not see a lot of modern technology in Equestria (although we definitely see some), but when it comes to culture and what is accepted they seem fairly modern to me.
Of course, we still have a way to go as well, tis sad but true.
4219494
Everything seems so perfect there, doesn't it. Everypony is so happy.
Makes you wonder what they put in the water.
Remember the episode where Twilight mentions her memory alteration spell?
4219506
Oh, its far from perfect. We have bigotry, we have scam artists, we have monsters, war, sickness. That still seems far removed to me though from a time when a woman could be lobotomised for not doing housework.
As for the memory alteration spell... You mean the season three finale?
4219559
Yeah, something like that. She mentions it in passing.
Just saying, there are probably a lot of spells available for troubled minds.
I wonder if this will be a point of conflict between Cadance/Twilight and Celestia/Luna. You did mention that Celestia was a bit old-fashioned and Luna might be worse, while Cadance will be all for the movement while Twilight just wants her friends to get along. On that note, I wonder how the Apple family might take it?
If I didn't know she was mentally ill, I would find that an incredibly cute personal ad, instead of just an incredibly funny one.
i agree at some points with Baree, but at least i enjoyed the story so far. I like it when Discord joins the Party and Cadance ejoy it somehow too. I don´t know what to think about that large parade, maybe a bit to much so suddenly, but i could understand them a bit. It´s like a last large protest and they want to fight for theyre right
I started reading because of the thunderlane tag and I have not been dissapointed...those dirty motherpluckers
Thank you for writing this, that's all I can say really. Anything else probably wouldn't have the same impact. So thank you.
your story has been added to the "Screwloose fanclub" folder titled "Main" Please notify me if you wish to have it removed... (I don't know if it can, but...)
Have a nice day!