• Member Since 3rd Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen Dec 31st, 2017

Zarius9998


:D X3 =^-^= <3 :P ô_ō -_- Ó_Ò ...enough said, I think...okay, maybe not, but, Eh, oh well.

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Luna's off on her Royal business, Twilight's feeling lonely, Rarity's losing her mind, and where the hay in Rainbow Dash!? Why is love so difficult for these poor mares...

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 5 )
#1 · Oct 23rd, 2011 · · ·

Good story. I would like to see some more LunaLight although i like Flarity and RariTwi :) keep up the good work :twilightsmile:

#2 · Oct 23rd, 2011 · · ·

Twiluna/LunaLight is my favorite ship.

This story gets a thumbs up from me.

Very nice. It would have been nicer to see it paced out a little more, and possibly broken up into a few chapters - it seemed to end fairly abruptly. However, the grammar was fine and the story simple, so it's good for a light read if you don't want to spend hours being bombarded by words. Also, it's TwiLuna, and it's well-written. That's an automatic approval from me.

(A personal gripe, though it just irks me when someone sticks the blurb and notes in with the story - there's the separate section for that - and it especially irks me when I see emoticons in there. This is meant to be continuous prose, and it has no place for those in my books. No-one else may find it so annoying, but I'm just letting you know. Otherwise, keep up the good work.)

17052

Awesome, glad to get a very positive and critique-filled review! I'm used to just getting a simple "Awesome, I like this." as a comment, but I REALLY enjoy these. Anywho...I think I specialize in short and entertaining reads. I also do NOT think romance and the like is really my forte, but it's nice to hear I'm pretty good at it! I couldn't really think of a good way to end it, though, which is why it seems rushed and whatnot at the end...I'm not good at wrapping-up anything vey well, actually, but I'm working on it! Plus, if i do more with this pairing that follows the same "timeline," it'll be in a series of oneshots here and there...or maybe i'll just compile it all into a non-linear story! You gave me an idea without even trying to!

Also, sorry that my author's notes bug you, I just usually like adding my two cents in with every chapter...not always though, so if you read any of my other stuff, please don't let the few AN's here and there get to you!

not quite sure what to say, it was sweet sure enough, but things of it didn't make that much sense. why and how was Luna striped of her magic powers and then yet have the magic to slow time? why would she let that mare hit her? there was something else but i forgot what it was : /

anyway, the story gab between the story and the epilogue just seemed very lazy to me, as if you had given up on the story and just wanted to finish it off. and all those '---------' felt very out of place also the comments in your () should probably not be there, they didn't really bother me as I myself really want to do them, i just don't because people seem to dislike em (maybe i should do them anyway in some future project).
and also the whole rarity and dash thing just felt really misplaced here and the story would probably have been better without, it felt like it was something that was tagged on for the only sake to make the story longer but severing no real purpose to the story itself.

beside all that i thought it was pretty cute and if you'll rewrite it sometime i would love to read it once more <3

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