• Member Since 3rd Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Tuesday

Razorbeam


My name was Razorbeam, and I am retired. (From Fanfiction)

T
Source

As the years drew on, Spike's childish heart grew into that of a true adult, longing for the finer things in life; the finest things. He pursues his relationship with Rarity, but all does not go as planned.

Filled with anger and sorrow, Spike and Rarity fall away from one another. In his grief, Spike pursues new interests, and their friendship is in danger of never recovering.

But perhaps the truest words in life are these: you do not know what you had until you have lost it. Jealous and alone, finding no comfort in stallions she once loved, can Rarity reclaim her one chance at true love, before it is too late?

Chapters (13)
Comments ( 1517 )

That was so sad!:fluttercry:

:pinkiesad2: Interesting start, looking forward to seeing where this goes.

I had my doubts after the short synopsis, but so far, this is actually pretty good. Rarity's fear is pretty legit and I'm kinda curious where you'll be taking this. A word of advice though, axe the long synposis. Seriously, don't spoil the story right away.

Only spotted one mistake:
All could feel was sadness. - I think you missed a "he".

Very well done!

What?:twilightoops:

<reads fic>

WHAT!?:pinkiegasp:

That synopsis. So bad. Stop spoiling your whole damn fic please.

It was decent. Please continue. Please just remove the synopsis.

Whats this?
A Spilestia? I havent seen one of these since the last time EQD updated the shipping chart and it held a single connection between Celestia and Spike.
Send this to EQD to see if you can add another line between those two.
:trollestia:+:moustache:=:heart:

This holds grand potential like the Judas Kiss does. I like this.
TRACKIN!:pinkiehappy:

You cant always get what you want, (current progress)
You cant always get what you want,
You cant always get what you want,
But you try sometimes,
You find,
YOU GET WHAT YOU NEED!

Sad and Romance? My cup of tea... Hehehe. Seriously though, I'm tracking this. Great work, looking forward to more.

Woah! Tracking just because of the description, sounds like a hell of a story

Great start, just cut down the description little and you'll be fine :twilightsmile:

I'm usually not into sad stories. But, you have just got my addicted to yours.

Definitely tracking.

I'm expecting manly tears soon.Good so far.

this is good
no other words for it:fluttercry:

I don't get even manly tears, but if I did, your story would inspire them. :fluttershysad: It looks very good, please continue! However, as some people have said in the earlier comments: I am leery of that synopsis beeing too spoilery.:ajbemused:

Very sorry to all who found the synopsis too revealing. I've cut it down significantly based on your advice. Again, I definitely should have noticed sooner and I apologize. It no longer reveals any hard plot points, but please let me know if you think it still needs changes! I will be posting in this fic at least once a week for certain; I'm truly shocked at the turnout this has generated, and I aim to please.

You will not be disappointed! Thanks for all the tracking!

:heart::heart::heart::heart:

More please. I need to see what happens next :fluttercry:

Liked and tracked. This chapter was sad enough as it is... :fluttershbad: keep it up!:pinkiehappy:

Bravo bravo. I suggest submitting to EQD.

good job sir
take my thumb and my track
i want to see how deep this rabbit hole goes

377913 THAT FREAKING PROFILE PIC IS ADORABLE. :rainbowkiss:

Short, but I am curious as to where this goes. :twilightsmile:

Oh, how I'd love to review it. However, you didn't ask for a review, so I shall refrain from doing so. Just know that it's good right now with only a few minor errors and deserving of a featured spot in my humble opinion.

imagine if rainbow dash flew above and was eavesdropping and saw him like that:rainbowderp:

HEY YOU SHOULD PUT THAT IN THE STORY!!!!!:raritystarry:

:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

5/5 for you

>>LunarShadow

Thank you kindly. Yes, it was late when it finally passed submission review, and I'm still finding little tweaks myself. Still, I guess I was eager to put it up and see how it did. I will be much more careful with my editting as it goes. Feel free to review if you like; I am very open to advice.

As for this chapter, it's only short because it was more of a 'testing the waters' chapter, useful mostly as an introduction. Believe you me, there will be plenty more content where this came from. :moustache:

Ooo, can't wait to read after work!

For everyone who suggested I submit this to EQD; I intend to, once I have a couple more chapters. I would like to at least be to chapter 3 by the time I submit this.

Yes it will be at least 3 chapters.

That said, perhaps you all can expect a new chapter by the end of the day. I'm in love with writing this fic like you wouldn't believe, so you'll forgive me if I just swing away. Hope you all wait patiently. :raritywink:

This probably wouldn't have happened if Spike remembered to get a moustache (fake or magic).
:raritywink::heart::moustache:
Great chapter by the way.

I know your feel Spike. I know your feel.

Oh dear... I might have shed a tear of two.

You have my attention! That was simply amazing.

I believe you captured this Spike in such a way that I can not but feel extremely sad for this drake. And Rarity, in her short sightedness, causing much more harm to herself and Spike than she could ever realize. Most people don't capture this raw emotion in such short words, also it helps that you have taken my favourite pony and made her cry like that. I soon follow... :raritycry:

I will be expecting many a manly tear.

Reminded me of the concept in "Like Fine Wine."

Definitely tracking. Also, twelve feet standing? Don't you think that's a little tall?

378990

When you count how long his neck must be, I'd imagine that's fairly short for a dragon, if anything. Plus, try to consider the option that ponies the size of the Mane Six are roughly four feet tall by comparison. Still, I can see where you're coming from. Too late now though. :derpytongue2:

wow, powerful story! thumbs up and tracking from me! :pinkiehappy:

378997

I didn't mean it in the sense that it detracts from the story, I just feel like you might encounter difficulties and inconsistencies as your story progresses because of his height.

Besides that, thanks for the hasty reply!

379018

Hey man, no problem. And thanks for the feedback. I figured that was more what you meant, but I actually have a few scenes plotted out that point back to that exact reference of his height. I intend to keep it standard for him, but if you plan on reading the new chapters when they come out, be sure to catch me if I trip up on it.

Oh, I do love a good Spike/Rarity fic, but Celesita? Definitely not my thing. But, this is so well written I'm going to give it a shot! And poor Spikey wikey! :raritydespair:

dude if yours story was a women i would make sweet love to it and never let it go. yeah its that awsome.

379089

You would be getting seconds, because lemme tell ya... I already did. And you're right. It was awesome. :rainbowkiss:

379087

Thank for considering my fic and testing your comfort zone. Even if it's not your thing, I hope you come to enjoy it as it moves forward. :pinkiehappy:

dude this story us awesome. keep up the good work man looking forward to the next chapter :fluttercry: :heart: :twilightsmile:

Through the first part of it I had the cheesiest smile on my face, but now i'm just... :fluttershyouch:

Spike! :raritydespair:

I literally started crying. :fluttercry:

Tracking and falling out of my chair for the next chapter.

thank you good sir, thank you.

This was postedd on my bday! :derpytongue2: MUSTACHES FOR YOU :moustache: :moustache: :moustache: :moustache: :moustache:

379811

Happy birthday, chief. :moustache:

Fic for you.

Gee, I wonder why Spike would-
>finding no comfort in stallions she once loved
Oh, that's why.

And you know, since there's such a sharp contrast with how Spike looks like all grown up in the show, I would like to think that his attitude and emotions determine how big he get's and how he looks like. That's the only way I can think of him just suddenly sprouting wings. And he's 12 ft tall? The ponies are only 4 ft tall. Really now?

Feels... Feels everywhere.

i liked...tracking confirmed:pinkiehappy:

Must like. Must track. Must resist crying my tear ducts out. :fluttercry:

Anyway, love the story. I will be on the edge of my seat waiting for the next chapter. :twilightsmile::heart:

:raritycry: Wait spiky wikey!

:moustache: Liek a boss

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