There are no ghosts in Equestria.
Those in the shadowlands can be brought back in memory, in stories and songs and laughs shared once again. But they never come into the world of the living, or fail to leave it in the first place.
Everypony knows that sort of thing never happens.
Everypony except one.
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Well dang. I had no clue what was going on 'till the late middle - I thought it had to do with the Mane Six. Nice twist with the cutie mark revelation, too.
Lately I'd been thinking "Gee, it seems like ages since I saw anything by Estee, I hope nothing's wrong", and then this story doesn't actually settle that question :P but good to see you're still here.
Delayed my bedtime to read this, didn't regret it. I wondered at first if this was a mystery, if I was supposed to be trying to figure out who it was and how it happened and that the ending would be a hopefully-a-twist, but it was not and I prefer it that way so good :P Okay, clearly I'm too tired to comment sensibly. In conclusion, good story, suitably haunting and ethereal if somewhat short, good to see you're still alive and good night o/
bloody hell this is great
Wonderful immersing narrative, flows surprisingly quickly, while never getting too detailed nor lacking in information. And the story and lore is just so intriguing and satisfyingly delivered.
Honestly Estee, from a straight up technical standpoint, I think this is the best thing you've written.
... which gets me to the sad and annoying part... I can't favorite this.
The narrative is brilliant and wonderful and everything great, but, well... then we get to the characters. Or rather, that one plot point
I've never been a fan of the "Silver Spoon is a 'follower'" idea, and this story, sadly, takes that idea and cranks it up to eleven
And it's the only issue I have with this otherwise brilliant fic. I mean sure, the "nobody cared about her" part was also a bit irritating, but I am easily willing to let that one past for the sake of the story. But the Silver Spoon thing... I don't know man... it just doesn't sit right with me for some reason
sigh
Either way, this is a wonderfully written story, and I very much enjoyed reading it.
Thanks for writing, Estee
I suspected from the character tags (which are themselves a skillful artistic statement.) I knew for certain when the mass of memory and hate and narration saw the bullying in action and commented on the innovation.
I'm not usually one for sad stories, but this was sad done well, and with the sort of paranormal spin that I can't resist. There's a lot of information about pony ghosts between the lines here, and I loved everything in both text and metatext. Thank you for an exquisite story.
This is exquisite indeed. I wish I had a more coherent response to it right now, but it left an impact. You do that consistently in a way few other writers manage.
I neglected to look at the character tags, so the majority of the reading was spent trying to guess who was who. This was magnificent. I loved the concept of the sheer vagueness of it all. It made figuring everything out much more satisfying.
By the blood on Luna's horn, Estee....
I knew I was getting into something beautiful and terrible when I saw the title and plot tags... and when I saw it was written by you. Once again you bring me tears - so many tears. And I loved shedding them.
I didn't look at the character tags, and I'm glad, since figuring it out was so powerful. Thank you for another very fine creation shared. Please keep them coming - I don't mind when the beauty I find is leavened with such pain, when both are so exquisite.
Light and laughter,
SongCoyote
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Since the subject of character tags came up a few times... I gave serious (if brief) thought on which ones to use. Or if I should even put any on at all.
I've left a few tags out before this, hiding Lady Appearing Later In This Story or keeping a major plot influence under wraps. But this time... there was a moment when I really felt everything about this story should be working without identity. Without names.
Kind of doubt the server would have let me get away with it, though.
So in the end, that one omission was deliberate. And I wonder if it should have gone further.
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'Any time I think no one writer has come up with something before me, it turns out that's because twenty-eight already did.'
(Not that I really believed this one was unique, but I had no idea it had been explored that much.)
This was extraordinary. It was very possible to work out what was going on; please don't tag the spoiler. (Actually in a way, an identified or unidentified character doesn't matter; the story hangs together on its own strengths. It's just deeper if you know who it's based on.)
So it turns out the lack of a funeral or some attendant factor dooms ponies to an eternal ghostlife full of bleak, relentless sensory torment? That's horrific. Or were the horror elements only there because this was not a nice pony? I could interpret it either way.
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But, um... it's more than hinted at in Twilight Time*. I mean, it's not like it's one of those virtually baseless fanon memes that irk me in the same sort of way.
*
This was lovely (in a saddening way). I just want to confirm in case I misinterpreted. Did the pony (we all know who it is but I won't say) kill themselves by setting fire to their own abode?
I reviewed this story as part of Read It Later Reviews #71.
My review can be found here.
This was an interesting and well-written story; thanks for writing it!
Regarding tags, I'm on the fence as to whether it might be worth adding a "mystery" tag. It's not a conventional mystery, but the same elements are in place (the reader is offered a puzzle that's only resolved at the end; arguably the viewpoint character has the same puzzle in-story).
Regarding the world appearing to the viewpoint character as a nuclear fallout hellscape, is that due to lack of a funeral, per World Builder, or is it something that Diamond Tiara did to herself (trying to build herself up by tearing everyone and everything else down)? You seem to be implying the latter with some of the comments others make about her (which was a nice touch), but clarification via comment would still be nifty. Likewise, is the viewpoint character a ghost due to external forces (lack of funeral), or internal ones (needing to have others acknowledge her again before leaving)?
As you hoped, the recent blog post did indeed bring me here. Might have gotten to it eventually, like many of your other works, but now I got to it today.
"respects the mare who got there first.."
"respects the mare who got there first." or "respects the mare who got there first..."?
Not thinking of much other substantial commentary at the moment, I'm afraid, but the story's getting an upvote from me.
When I dove into this fic, the thought of looking at the character tags didn't even cross my mind, and like other readers I am glad for that. While being guided through by the ghost narrator's uniquely indescribable levels of descriptiveness (with how it swayed throughout the spectrum of specificity), I had a blast guessing who the ghost was. An original character? Rarity? Pinkie Pie? Surprise? An unborn foal? Rarity? A meta-observer (i.e. us)? Fluttershy? Posey? Rarity?! Twilight? Sweetie Belle? Fluttershy? Apple Bloom? Scootaloo? Silver Spoon? Twist? Diamond Tiara!
See, I'm a bit of a mystery-lover, so that aspect helped keep me engaged despite my bad habit of letting thoughts bog me down. The story itself is very nice too, having successfully won my investment!
Whoooooa, that was quite the event! :D
Hell f I know :B
The shadowlands are pretty awesome, just a continuation of life for all eternity (with some visual changes which doesn't matter at all), I'm down for that.
Heyyy, I read you a thing!
I got a very strong 'Ghost of Christmas Future' vibe from this. Very eerie, great conclusion.
That was so very good, Estee. It took me a bit to unravel the characters but that was part of what made it interesting. This had a bit of 'A Christmas Carol vibe and it really set the mood of this story. It's good that she had at least one friend who remembered her fondly and would speak about her.
Can't fave, too depressing. But it's an excellent short story.
i.pinimg.com/564x/36/70/5a/36705a5cf3cbe8fb307b54feb8b50373.jpg
Link
It's still as good as the last time I read it.
The warmth of the sun.
You can has review!
Wow! This must be one of the best ghost stories I've ever read.
I'm not sure these spoiler tags are needed, but I use them just in case.
Such an interesting take on what it might be like, for some ponies (people?) at least. A wonderful story of mourning and its opposite and its absence, and where that path might lead, and how it might end (in one world, at least. Whether the story's world is the last world for its protagonist, we are not told; but of some answers which perhaps cannot be spoken, it's well to be silent.)
I, too, loved your take on that cutie mark, that good twist. You've given Spoon quite a development arc...or maybe it's as much that your Spoon walked you through it, I don't know. Writing a character can be quite an experience, can't it?
It's an understatement to say: Recommended! 👍