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1 - Twilight's Birthday989 words
2 - Brotherly Kindness1,372 words
3 - An Innocent Reptile1,664 words
4 - To date or not to date Iron Will1,847 words
5 - Desprate measures 1,414 words
6 - Trains2,256 words
7 - What a Woman Wants1,418 words
8 - Point of no Return1,888 words

8 - Point of no Return

Twilight could not believe what she had just seen; she'd guessed when Rarity's regular letters had turned to infrequent postcards that she had been going a bit… off, but spontaneously giving orders to Cadance was bordering insane! This had to be a joke, Cadance and Rarity must have gotten together earlier and arranged this as a joke on her; well Twilight would play along. Either way, Twilight needed to find Cadance and apologize.

Her first stop was obviously Ponyville’s only ice-cream store; but it was empty. Realizing Cadance had probably gotten lost, Twilight double backed and began scanning Ponyville. Fifteen minutes of frantic search had shown no sign of Cadance and so Twilight double backed again back. A glimpse of Cadance’s coat through the window told Twilight she had finally found her, she galloped the last thirty yards, opened the door and-

“WHAT!?”

Inside Twilight saw Cadance, Iron Will, and very little space between. Cadance was standing on the very tips of her hind hooves, pressing herself against Iron Will’s rock-hard abs as her hooves rubbed up and down his shoulders with small grunts of pleasure. If Iron Will looked shocked by Cadance’s misconduct, he showed no signs of disapproval as he leaned down, his carnivores teeth showing as his hands moved way closer to Cadance’s flank than anyone but Shining Armor should be moving.

This couldn’t be happening, it went against every law of decency and loyalty Twilight knew of, and it was happening right in front of her! The embrace was short lived; at the sound of Twilight’s voice, Cadance turned, her face turning to fear as she saw Twilight and fell away from Iron Will, collapsing to the floor in a horribly indecent position, “Twilight,” she squeaked, managing to pull herself upright, spinning her mortified glance between Iron Will and Twilight, “This… isn’t how I wanted you to find out.”

“What? Find out what!?” Had Shining Armor been experimenting with a new spell that changed him into a minotaur, and so canceled the wedding and been avoiding Twilight until he found a way to turn back to a stallion? That would have made perfect sense! Cadance having an affair didn’t!

Cadance swallowed slowly, regaining her composure and leveled her gaze to Twilight’s, “I’m leaving your brother for Iron Will.”

“Cadance! This isn’t you, you can’t be cheating on my brother with a minotaur!”

“Yes; I can.” Cadance replied firmly, “Shining Armor never gave me the respect I deserved as a pony or as a mare. For years I suffered in silence, telling myself that one day he’d change, but Iron Will showed me that instead of waiting for something that would never happen, it was me that needed to change for me to be happy; and have found what it means to be truly loved in Iron Will.”

“He’s not even a pony!”

“I know.” Said Cadance, closing the distance between them, “But love is more than matter, I had hoped that you of all ponies would understand that. I need to do what’s best for me, and I want you to at least try to talk to Iron Will, he’s really an amazing person, just give him a chance.”

Twilight glared up at Iron Will. Thirty different things to scream at the pederferous, home wrecking, advantage taking, cheating, back-stabbing, mare snatching minotaur were running through Twilight’s head; and none of them were nice. “Stay away from Cadance.”

Iron Will stared back at Twilight, and then Cadance gave him a small kick to the shins; “If you won't give your blessing to the union of me and Cadance, then I have no choice but to challenge you to Paerellk.”

“Paerellk.” snapped Twilight, “What's that?”

“I know what it is!” shouted Scootaloo rearing up; “Paerellk is a minotaur combat ritual that's sometimes used in matters of divorce or ending an engagement. If the family of the guy who got dumped doesn't like it; one of them can challenge the new guy of the girl who did the dumping to a fight.”

Cadance stiffened, and looked up at Iron Will worryingly; “Is that really necessary?”

“Of course it's necessary.” shouted Scootaloo, “If Twilight doesn't fight Iron Will now; it means she's officially giving her blessing to Cadance's and Iron Will's marriage.”

“Marriage?!” Twilight shouted at Cadance, “You're actually thinking about marrying him!?”

“I am.” said Cadance evenly, “We're... engaged to be married next week.”

“Next week!?” Howled Twilight, “How long have you been seeing him!?”

“Since last week.”

Twilight collapsed, banging her head against the floor several times as if the impact to her head would knock some sense into Cadance. She got her breathing under control, “And Shining Armor?”

“I haven't told him about this yet.”

Twilight was back on her hooves in an instant, her vocal cords ready to scream some exasperated comment as soon as her mind could catch up with her. “The only way you can stop this is if you fight Iron Will.” said Scootaloo cheerfully, “But it doesn't have to be to the death; just until one of you gives up.”

Twilight glared at Cadance, “If I knock him out you'll reconsider this?”

“If you knock him out he can't marry me without your permission. It's his way.”

Twilight slapped herself hard several times on the face to make sure she wasn't hallucinating; and when the scene didn't dissipate she breathed deeply and looked at Cadance, “I... can't forbid you from marrying anyone; but if I fight him then you need to promise me you're not going to move forward with this without thinking it through carefully, for like, a year or something; and talking with Shining Armor about this.”

“Deal; but you have to fight him outside your library, otherwise it wouldn't be Paerellk.”

“Fine!” Growled Twilight, slamming the door open as she felt another wave of anger coming over her; that Cadance could be so... so indifferent about cheating on Shining Armor with another species and then acting so casual as he challenged her to a fight! There had to be something she was missing here; but there wasn't any time to think. She felt another wave of profanity coming on.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Pinkie Pie was swinging through the rooftops of Ponyville, her bags packed, her party cannon loaded and ready to be the bestest-fake-fillyfriend ever! She had gotten Iron Will into trouble and now by golly she was going to get him out of out of it again!

When Iron Will first asked her to be his pretend-fillyfriend, Pinkie had wanted to say yes on the spot, but then thought better of it. If they had gone straight to Ponyville on their first date, and Stone Resolve wanted proof that they were in love, they wouldn’t have had any, but that had all been taken care of now. In the last two hours Pinkie had drafted a dozen romantic love letters Iron Will had sent her and stashed them under her pillow, framed one of Iron Will’s posters which she then hung over her bed and updated her facebook status. (She didn't know if Stone Resolve was as ahead of the times as she was, but she wasn't about to take any chances.)

She'd just made a booking for two at Ponyville’s most romantic restaurant, all she needed to do was get him there, and then start eating from her party-cannon. Iron Will would warn her to slow down, but she wouldn’t listen and then load her cannon with her latest batch of Sugar Surprise! Iron Will would then push her out of the way at just the last moment and eat the blast himself; consuming enough special pastries to put a grown minotaur into a sugar come for about three days, thereby saving her from death by heart attack and enjoying a enviable dose of sugary goodness!

Pinkie spotted her fake bullfriend right as he came outside the ice-cream store, bounded towards him and then up onto his shoulders, holding on by wrapping her hind legs around his neck and then planted a playful kiss on the lips. “Hi Willy; when you left this morning you forgot my picture.” She said cheerfully, slipping a rather saucy picture of herself in socks into Iron Will’s satchel, before letting herself fall to the ground in front of him, “Come with me! I’ve got a great evening planned with-”

Pinkie froze; her eyes narrowing onto the pink alicorn standing way to close to her pretend bullfriend! Pinkie’s mind backpedaled; what was it that Twilight had been yelling as she was dashing over the rooftops; ‘Cadance! This isn’t you, you can’t be cheating on my brother with a minotaur! Cadance! This isn’t you, you can’t be cheating on my brother with a minotaur! With a minotaur! With a minotaur! WITH A MINOTUAR!’

“You’re… cheating on me?”

Cadance, Iron Will and Twilight stared at Pinkie in shock, Iron Will tried to say something, but it was too late; Pinkie had seen through his lies, all the love they had pretended to share between them was nothing but lies, “YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME!!!!!!”

How could she have been so blind? How could she have not known that there was another mare in Iron Will’s pretend heart? There was only one thing left to do; prove to Iron Will that she, only she was his true, pretend love!

Cadance turned between Pinkie and Iron Will several times before stepping away from him, pointing her hoof accusingly as her face mingled with shock and betrayal, “Is this true Iron Will? Have you been seeing this mare behind my back?”

“Iron Will stepped back, raising his hands; “It’s not… I… umm… You’re both very special to me in your own separate ways but-”

“But who do you love?” shouted Cadance flying into his face, “All those times when you said you loved me, that you wanted us to be together; were those all lies you two-faced cheat?”

“Hey!” Pinkie didn’t care if he was cheating on her, no-one got to talk to her pretend-bullfriend like that; besides, it probably wasn’t even his fault that he was cheating on her, it must be Cadance’s fault, she must have been chasing after him every time Pinkie wasn’t looking, trying to numb his mind with her cheap royal alicorn charm.

Well no more.

Pinkie jumped into the air, caught Cadance and tackled her to the ground, “You stay away, from Iron Will,” Pinkie hissed, “He’s mine.”

Cadance glanced up towards Iron Will, then back to Pinkie, and then shoved Pinkie backwards, “Well I don’t see your name on him…bitch.”

Pinkie pushed back; “Floozy!”

Cadance slapped Pinkie, “Whore!”

Pinkie faltered for a moment and then jumped over Cadance, bit her mane and began pulling as hard as she could. A few steps away Twilight stood frozen except for one eye twitching sporadically and her mount hanging limply open until it managed to shout, “…WHAT!?”

Author's Note:

This is where things start to get crazy...

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