When Divinity Just Won't Cut It

by BlimpAtomic

The Reasons We Can't Have Nice Things

For somepony that I thought personally hated me, Celestia really went all-out in making me feel comfortable here. I noticed it from the minute I walked into the guest room lobby. Right. The lobby. There's an entire section of the castle dedicated to guest rooms. And it is beautiful. It smelled like lemons and a little bit of rich chocolate. White marble columns sprang up from the polished oak floors. A stainless steel elevator in the corner of the room was quietly buzzing while a stallion in a tuxedo played a giant ivory piano in the other corner. It was amazing, and I couldn't think of what to say. I actually stood there for a few seconds completely dazed by everything I was seeing before a cute beige mare with a brown ponytail called me over.

"Mr. Flare, sir?" Oh I loved that. I almost asked her to say it again.

"At your service," I replied, doing a little bow, at which she giggled.

"Official business here?"

"Recovery of official documents and research regarding the Crystal Empire," I said as professionally as possible.

"Your room is 406," she said as she handed me the light blue electronic key. "Enjoy your stay!" I merely nodded and headed to the elevator.

---

And then, modern things. For as ancient as the castle looked on the outside, the inside was as good as a Manehattan penthouse. Glass windows, hard granite floors, and other luxury things were everywhere. Is this what it felt like to be an elite? Because it was feeling good. I threw my stuff under the bed and looked at the time. 11:30. I still had some time to dick around. After all, when somepony says "at noon" or any specific time, it never happens until about 15 minutes after. I sat on the bed, wondering what there was to do around such a giant empty place. I could put more guards to sleep, but that got old after the third guy. I glanced at myself in the mirror and found myself staring back, my robe still in good shape. Then, another idea.

"I really shouldn't," I said briefly.

"You know you're going to anyway."

"Fuck you. Get out of here."

"I can leave just as easily as you can swim across the ocean."

I sighed. "I don't wanna see him again. I'm cool with him, but not right now."

"You're such a fucking let-down. To both him and I."

Before I could retaliate, Guilt Trip Flare had drifted away into some god-forsaken region of my brain. I sighed. I wasn't going to do it. Fuck him. I wasn't. I didn't feel like seeing my dad again. It just wasn't convenient right now. I looked at the time. 12:01. I got my sorry ass up, hoping to every goddess and princess I knew that Celestia wasn't really going for exact timing.

"...and that's why I'm late." The response meant nothing as I was glared at by two irritated princesses and one giggling draconequus.

Author's Note:

Short chapter, but I'd like to say this is just filling the gaps in between more significant plot events. I'll see to it that this doesn't happen that often.