• Member Since 29th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Apr 6th, 2021

Midnight Sonare


In the rays of the sun I am longing for the darkness

E
Source

After feeling sad Scootaloo finds comfort in someone special to her that she had long time without seeing, but things didn't end as she expected.




Special thanks to my editors:
AtomicMuffin
Poets Dream

Note:
This story was written before the Flight To The Finish episode. Any resemblance, even the smallest ones, is pure coincidence.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 141 )

Sad and bittersweet.:fluttershysad: Maybe a little fast in some areas but overall it was a good story.

Interesting. Very well done story

Dammit the feeelsss!:raritydespair:

Dude, this should be a series

This needs to be a series

3635708>>3635756
No promises, but if the story earn enough likes, maybe I will make the long story that I have in my head.
And I'm glad that you like it. :pinkiehappy:

Well that was quite the bitter sweet tear jerker. Still good job.

Poor little Scootaloo.:applecry:

This better be featured:moustache:

3635851
I hope. This could be my first fic getting featured. :pinkiehappy:
Oh god, this is just my second fic.:pinkiegasp:

3635861
Also you have some wonderful art work.

3635868
Thanks! I made it myself.:twilightblush:

3635871
Well you are indeed a very good artist:twilightsmile:

Well, that's a Scootloo's Parents Story thwt I've neverseen before. Pretty neat idea, and a nice story, to boot. I agree that this could make a good series. Here's to hoping.

3635708>>3635756>>3635774>>3635878
Well, I'm really considering now to make it a series. It's just that I didn't expected that this became so popular.:pinkiegasp:

I know that this Isn't that popular, but still I'm happy that people like it.

3635903
You wrote it's awesomeness, please make this a series or I'll bet you inspire others to continue if you don't.

Just saying:moustache:

3635910>>3635911
Oh God! Ok ok, I'm going to make it a long story. :yay:

I'm glad that you all like it and you deserve to know the story that I have in my mind. I just hope that you will like it. :raritystarry:

Wow, I left for one hour and 10 likes more! :pinkiehappy::heart:

3636105>>3636072
What the.... :rainbowhuh:

And featured! finally:moustache:

3636182
Well, that's... fine... I suppose... :derpyderp2:
Anyway, I'm glad that you like the story. :pinkiesad2:

3636206
Indeed my friend:heart:

3636194>>3636206
OMG! REALLY!? :pinkiegasp:
*Checking out the feature box*

Oh god! I can't be more happy now :pinkiehappy::pinkiesad2:

3636212
What's with :pinkiesad2: this face my friend?

3636218
I'm really happy but I feel sad for the story that I replaced. But I'm still really happy :pinkiehappy:

3636233
Don't be sad be glad:trollestia:

3636237
I'm glad, I already take a picture of the story featured :pinkiehappy::yay:

Oh, how could I forget to thank my editors :facehoof:
I'm sorry AtomicMuffin and Poets Dream :twilightblush:

D48

This is very good and I am looking forwards to seeing more in the future.

Here are my impressions.
Stuff I think was good:
I absolutely love this premise. Scootaloo as a changeling is always fun to read. Your explanations on how Scoots ended up as she did were wonderful. I definitely enjoyed this story. And congrats on the feature!:pinkiehappy:

Stuff that could be better:
The first thing I noticed was way too much telling here. Do some research on telling vs showing and practice that a bit. The characterization was... not quite right. When I read the story, It bugged me that the characters were doing and saying things they wouldn't normally do or say. Remember to always play your story off the characters' personalities. Don't change them to fit your story. The word flow was a little rough and there were a few grammatical errors. Try putting yourself in the place of the reader; doing this will allow you to see what works and what doesn't.

Inspire others, and keep up the good writing!:twilightsmile:

3636701

If you need help learning how to tell rather than show, I am happy to give you a crash course in it. :twilightsmile:

3636706
Do you mean me or Midnight Sonare?:rainbowhuh:

3636719
... Both? I am the kind of guy to lend a hand whenever I can to whomever I can

I really hope this gets turned into a full bigger story.:pinkiehappy:

3636701
Thanks, I'm glad that you like it.
You are the first one who commented about the flaws in my story and I really appreciate it. It's always good to know what I need to improve. :twilightsmile:

3636734
I'm always willing to learn.

3636734
Good to you, my friend, but I won't need a class on show vs tell. :twilightsheepish:

3636753
You're very welcome, and don't take anything I said the wrong way. You're a great writer with a lot of potential.:pinkiesmile:

So Scootaloo isn't just a handicapped pegasus, she's also a handicapped changeling?

Diamond Tiara obviously has the right idea.

3636774
I didn't take it in the wrong way. I'm not perfect and I have still a lot to learn to be a good writer. Comments like yours just reminds me that and motivate me to try to improve. :twilightsmile:


3636838
Just imagine what would happen if Diamond Tiara finds out that. :unsuresweetie:

:applecry::fluttershysad::pinkiesad2::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry: Poor scootaloo

Really nice idea, I hope you continue :pinkiesmile:

please continue I am really interested in this idea

3636701
Handy tips for any aspiring writer.

3635769 In that case, I shall invest my likes with extreme zealotry.
Moar, please?

So this is a nice thing. People like it. I like it. People want more of it. I'd be fine with more. Were there flaws to this? There probably were. Do I care about the potential flaws? Not really, no. Thanks.

Ending sucked (sorry to be blunt, but my feeling on it), again another one shot that would be a much better read if it was more than one chapter :pinkiesad2:

3637079>>3637129>>3637168
Of course that will be more! I'm going to make a story from the beginning. :raritystarry:
Just be patient and wait for it.

I want MORE :flutterrage: please :fluttercry: btw AWESOME STORY

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