• Member Since 4th Aug, 2013
  • offline last seen May 5th, 2019

Slate Sadpony


Male earth pony. Exceptionally weird.

E

Rainbow Dash finds herself hospitalized with injuries after a crash. While there, she finds herself rooming with Ivy Cluster, a young colt suffering from leukemia. Rainbow forms a bond with the colt over Daring Do, cake and the Wonderbolts, but she needs to be strong for her frightened and depressed friend. When Ivy fails to recover, Rainbow must confront the loss and the fundamental fact that life is not fair.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 40 )

3156073

I'm glad you liked it.

Buck you! I can't believe you wrote such a sad story and made me cry. :fluttercry:

None the less it was great, but I did notice a mistake.

“I wanna find out how Rainbow Dash gets past the Sphinx Guard.”

So RD is part of the book now?

3156529

I'll go in and fix that.

Very well written

I liked it

The hardest thing for a hero to learn is that you can't always save the day; that there is a limit to your power and your ability to save.

3159242

I'm glad you liked it!

Daaaaaw! Nice story, but damn sad :fluttercry: (Could you maybe make a sequel in wich ponies have an "afterlive" and Ivy hears rainbow reading :twlightblush:?)

3161204

Nope.

Ponies die, life is not fair.

Just how it is.

3165012

Don't let me stop you from writing about Dashie and Ivy being best friends in the Pony afterlife.

Buck you and how amazingly sad your stories are.:fluttershysad: Really great read though.

3167261

They say "write what you know."

3168792
Then keep knowing!

*Folds hands together*

Finally. After all this time, I've finally found another gem in this dying website. I'm endlessly pleased with your style of writing. It's refined, crisp and paced to perfection. It is clear, yet taunting to the imagination. It fuels the thoughts and drives anticipation into us like a hot nail through the wrist. From beginning to end I was entranced; not only did you skip needless details, but you made a universally boring trope into a believable--and heart-wrenching--plot device.

For the most part, you captured Rainbow Dash's character. Even better, you challenged her in a believable way, AND kept her 'in character'. I could totally see her reacting in the ways that you've so beautifully crafted. But the greatest merit of this piece? Ivy. There are few who can make us care for OC's, and you've proven to be among them. From the first time he was introduced--from the first couple of sentences--I smiled simply because he challenged Rainbow Dash's pride. That alone spoke volumes about his character, unintentional or not. You know... when he wasn't crying himself to sleep.

However, I did have my gripes.

What glared poisonous barbs into my soul was the ending execution. Call me picky, but I'd have loved, loved, LOVED to see Rainbow Dash denying the whole thing to the point where she demanded to see Ivy, then knocking over tables and kicking ponies in the face for trying to stop her. Then again, I guess that's what you put Twilight there for. I mean, Rainbow was kicking and screaming as Twilight held her.

Other than that, everything was downright perfect. Published book quality, and I've read a few good ones. Spelling, grammar, and the like were flawless, and the narration kept me glued to your tale. And now, as I dry my tears, despairing over why fimfiction didn't have you years ago, I bid you farewell.

Craine...

PS: I read your thread in the Writer's Group, and am curious of your ideas. I'd love to see what an artist such yourself as to offer. Shoot me a PM if you're still looking for assistance.:twilightsmile:

3194518

Gotta say, even in my formal literary days, I've never had anyone drown me with so much praise. It's...Well, I appreciate it.

I wrote this after getting feedback on "The Saga of Slate," which is plagued with problems, and this piece was intended to have none of those problems. According to your comment, I succeeded. Where "Saga" is long, boring and full of crap, "Life" is short and to the point. I'm glad I was able to so quickly shake off three years of inactivity and come back to life with a story that clearly gave you so much enjoyment.

I wanted Ivy to be the sort of character that Dash would become friends with had he lived. He's not some insolent little suck-up - he's someone who shares her interests and thinks she's cool. He looks up to her, but he doesn't idolize her or kiss her butt.

Since you seem so interested in my work and process - "Ivy Cluster" is a name I extracted from Ian Curtis (same initials, similar-as-possible spelling), the depressed, epileptic and ultimately suicidal lead singer/songwriter for Joy Division. I'm a big fan of Ian's songs, and I wanted Ivy to have the same "I'm a rebel, but you should feel sorry for me, also I died before you got to know me" feel.

I thought I made it clear that Dash was in the anger and denial stages of grieving, and the only reason she didn't destroy more property was because Twilight kept her from doing it. And had Twilight not been magically confining her, she would have been prosecuted for vandalism or trespass to chattels. She's a physically expressive character, and so violence is part of her means of self expression. She gets upset, she breaks things. It's what she does because she needs to vent and is afraid of appearing weak by crying.

My writing is so good because I'm an out-of-work author. I've had decades of formal training and even written several (awful) novels. I'm glad all that hard work and training comes through. I hope you read my other works and enjoy them similarly.

Note me if you want to look at my outlines, I think you could provide solid commentary.

3168792 No greater truth than this one. :pinkiehappy:
Oh and amazing story! I truly was lost in the sea of emotions and imagination that is, "Life is not fair"
This probably isn't a helpful comment but, oh well. :pinkiehappy:
Keep on doing what you're doing!

3202817

Just happy to see people enjoying my hard work.

3287121

I am glad you liked it :)

>Crystal Chalice of Unas
Heh heh, it's an anagram of anus! :derpytongue2:
Sorry for being stupid, I'll leave now...

3289674

Horrible death and emotional torment and this is what you focus on ;P

It's always difficult with fics that you know will end in tragedy, but having written a similar story, I wanted to enjoy the emotional experience from the other end for once.

This was very moving. Rainbow's reactions to everything felt spot on, from her initial shock at seeing an emancipated colt, to blowing up at her friend over his death, to leaning against the tombstone lightly, as if she was trying to subconsciously embrace him. That's the part that got me.

Thanks for sharing this with us.:heart:

3290370

The word is "emaciated."

"Emancipated" would imply that he was freed from bondage or imprisonment.

And yes, Dashie wishes she could hug Ivy, but she can't, and that causes her pain.

I'm glad you like it :twilightsmile:

3290441

It was emaciated in my head! It just became emancipated when it got legal release from my brain.

Can't say I cried, but I sure felt like it. Especially after how you made me smile in the beginning.

While there were one or two parts at the end that struck me as odd, none of those take away from how good this story is.

Well done.

3290921

I'm glad you liked it so much!

LOVED this story! I just read this with some friends. I'll let you know when the video is up.

3305542

I'm glad you liked it.

And a video? You mean you read it aloud? I'm honored...

This story was great. But, with the title, you know something's gonna go wrong. But I really did like the story

I actually do like this new ending better. It fits more with the show and Rainbow learned a nice little friendship lesson in the meantime. Well done. :heart:

3363136

I'm glad you do! I really wracked my brain for how to re-do it. Although I still feel the ending I went with is kind of obvious, at least it helps Rainbow Dash not be a crazy pony who talks to rocks.

That's Pinkie's job! :pinkiehappy:

I almost cried. Almost.:fluttershysad::raritydespair::raritycry::fluttershysad:

3380546

I am glad you liked it.

And don't feel bad. It was so sad it made Rainbow Dash cry.

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