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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Okay I'm gonna look this over later, it looks interesting.
I guess Twilight has some kind of goth fetish
Fetlocks?
The comma or 'and' here; having both are redundant. The sentence reads correct if you axe one or the other, but it sounds odd having both comma and 'and'.
I absolutely love this smell. But I think the word you're after here is 'petrichor' or 'geosmin', both of which are smells that would be prominent in the air after rainfall.
i.imgur.com/GSTLuGP.jpg
This sounds awkward in a couple places.
It's already established that the pony is resting, so having 'rested' (the second instance of 'rest'), to me seems not needed.
You say it's a statue, but when carving things they're either being carved from, or into rock/stone. Suggest changing it to "carefully chiseled from/into (take your pick) the rock".
Personally I think axing "of some sort" gives the sentence a more foreboding sense. As it stands it's rather casual which isn't good in this sense.
on what remained *of the cobblestone path
This was a decent read, and I'm looking forward to seeing what more there is.
come on let luna turn twilight into a bat pony or is one of those bat ponies are a separate race universes
to paint a straight white line in Twilight’s tongue.
*on
Wow this version of Twily is so hot.
I'm not sure what to think about this. I loved everything about it but the part where Twilight gets double teamed by two 'stallion' bat ponies. I wouldn't have minded as much (at all really) if it were two futa bat ponies.
I honestly don't know why but I have some weird aversion to seeing/reading Twilight with a stallion. Any other pony on the show I don't care but Twilight Sparkle? NO! ICKY, ICKY! DON'T WANT!
For some reason I want to see Twilight Sparkle portrayed as a fillyfooler and nothing else (it just seems more adorkable for some reason).
Am I wrong for finding the graveyard, gothiy, poe inspired setting kinda cool?
I am very...very interested to see more of this one for sure, the atmosphere during the dream was written wonderfully
6025603 No, not really.
God damn, I want more of this... Luna watching them fuck, then actually getting to feel what they are? I've never seen that before, and I love it.
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