Who Wears the Saddle?
“Wowwwwwwww…” Props’ blue eyes sparkled. “Not one, not two, but three skystone pylones?! That’s incredible!” Her ears drooped as she winced heavily. “Well, aside from the stupidly violent attack and heartless foalnapping… eh heh heh…”
“Grrrr-raaugh!” Rainbow Dash kicked the dinner table and resumed pacing around the Noble Jury’s mess hall. “Where the heck did they even get that crud?! I thought it was rare!”
“Not rare,” Props explained from where she sat besides Ebon and Eagle Eye. “Just really hard to get.”
“Floydien had to brave tempests at northern world ridge to get a piece for Nancy Jane’s wings,” the elk muttered in the corner, examining one of his antlers in his grasp. “If the new stabby stabby are crazy enough to attack paint bucket and call it friendship, then they’re crazy enough to get anything they want.”
“And from the sound of it,” Pilate muttered from where he sat besides a visibly shaken Bellesmith. “They had a great deal of time for this moment and this moment alone.”
“So all of this was premeditated from years ago?” Eagle Eye remarked.
“More like millennia ago,” Pilate remarked.
“But I don’t get it!” Eagle Eye gestured wildly as he spoke. “If they wanna help Rainbow Dash so much, why outright attack her and steal the book of runes?!”
“‘Cuz they’re friggin’ idiots,” Rainbow Dash grunted in mid-pace.
Pilate sighed. “Think of it as a great deal of knowledge invested with increasing degrees of presumption over the eons. It’s very possible to execute the wrong idea in all the right ways.”
“Tell me about it,” Rainbow Dash muttered, still pacing. “They knew absolutely nothing about who I am and what I’ve been through, but they knew enough about me to be--like--thirty dang steps ahead! Unngh! I could barely catch up with their jerkface of a leader! It was so frustrating!”
“They certainly lost several members of their fold to accomplish what they thought was important,” Roarke said from where she sat in the corner. Her eye-lenses pistoned out. “Sadly, none of them lived long enough for me to interrogate.”
“The idea is… much appreciated, Roarke,” Eagle Eye said nervously. “But, now we gotta deal with the fact that we’re stranded here.”
“Stranded?” Ebon asked.
“The beautiful colt is right,” Props said with a pouting expression as she leaned forward. “The super special thing about that glowy book was that it cycled power through the augmented engines and gave the skystone something to recharge itself with! Until I find a power source that’s even remotely as spiffy as what those baddies stole, we’ve got less than three days of flight! And even then, we’d only make a top speed of seventy miles per hour tops! And then all systems would just power down from there!”
“Couldn’t we find something here?” Rainbow Dash asked, gesturing out a nearby porthole. “Why not find a new power source, hook it up, and then go after those psycho clowns?!”
“Nancy Jane is a sensitive, meticulously beautiful beloved!” Floydien said with a snarling tone. He plopped his remaining antler back into his skull and glared across the room. “No simple operation done in a day would make her fly right!”
“Even if we could solve everything overnight, we haven’t enough money to buy the sort of energy source that’s required!” Props said. “Plus, my Uncle Prowse isn’t around anymore. I don’t really have the same influence to haggle our way to a solution here.”
Rainbow Dash hung her head with a sigh.
Props then tapped her chin in thought. “Unless…”
Rainbow’s wings arched as she glanced up at her. “What?” She leaned forward. “Unless what?!”
“Well, I suppose I could refit the womb to Floydien’s beloved with a steam engine and cycle pipes along the manaconduits. The energy left in the skystone should be enough to heat the water and produce enough thrust to operate for a long distance at one third the normal speed. It’d certainly make us go faster than we’re going now.”
“Great!” Rainbow Dash grinned wide. “How long would it take to go all steam punk on this bucket of bolts!”
Props bit her lip, blushing. “Erm… f-four days, and that’s if we somehow manage to buy all the parts at affordable prices.”
“Guhhhhh…” Rainbow Dash hung her head.
Josho trotted into the room, telekinetically levitating an ice pack against his swollen crown. “Ungh… are we still going at this?”
“Yes, old stallion,” Eagle Eye said with a frown. “We are.”
“I’d say the solution is simple,” the ex enforcer said as he found a chair besides Floydien. “Tell the head haunchos of the Upper Roost here that we know the punks who are responsible for all the crap that went down.” He felt a heavy antler-thwap to his shoulder. Sighing, he silently scooted a space away from the elk and continued. “Wouldn’t they want to track these idiots down so they could at least pay restitution?”
“You forget just how neutral Gray Smoke is,” Ebon Mane said. “They’ll look for a loophole that’ll get them to claim that this was just a matter of an outside conflict, then force the remaining party to pay for damages.”
“Sooooo…” Josho furrowed his brow. “Meaning, us.”
Ebon bit his lip and nodded. “Yup. ‘Fraid so.”
“Well, that’s utter mule muffins!”
“Look, I didn’t say I liked the Upper Roost either!” Ebon exclaimed, then sighed. “I wish there was a simpler way to get back the Noble Jury’s energy source, but there doesn’t seem to be an easy away to it.”
“Who cares about an old book full of prophetic nonsense?!” Bellesmith growled. She sniffled, glaring across the table with glossy eyes. “What about Kera Tin Mehjj?!”
Ebon bit his lip and lowered his gaze towards the tabletop.
Silence filled the room.
Belle shuddered, her voice shaky as she stammered, “These creeps attacked Rainbow Dash, abducted my beloved, attacked Floydien and Simon, almost killed Josho… and what for?! Some ancient string of words that a bunch of ancient pegasi may or may not have written?”
“That seems to be the long and short of it,” Roarke droned. Rainbow Dash winced.
Belle frowned even harder. “Just what kind of horrible things could they be doing to a foal like Kera?! Huh?! That should be the focus of this conversation! I’m sorry, Props, Mr. Floydien, but I could care less about how we power up this ship!”
“But, beloved,” Pilate spoke softly, squeezing her shoulders. “As long as we’re dead in the water, we can’t even begin searching anywhere.”
“Then we need to think of another solution!” Belle snapped, her voice echoing across the bulkheads. “We need to find a way to get Kera out of that and deal with that situation first!”
Rainbow Dash fidgeted where she stood. She turned about, squinting towards a blank spot along the wall.
Ebon glanced at her. “What are you looking at?”
“I can still see it…” Rainbow Dash muttered. “No matter how far away it is.”
Eagle Eye sat up straight. “You m-mean… the book?!”
Rainbow solemnly nodded. “Wherever it is, they haven’t bothered to destroy it.”
“Naturally, they wouldn’t,” Pilate said. “They consider it a holy relic.”
“But they almost destroyed Rainbow Dash, didn’t they?” Josho remarked. “What makes you think these flankswipes would bother to keep the book in one piece?”
“I don’t think they ever meant to kill Rainbow Dash,” Pilate said. “Rather, I think they know that she’s made of stronger stuff, and this sort of message--albeit melodramatic--was the only way to get her to do what they want.”
“Which is…?” Eagle asked.
Pilate’s mouth lingered before uttering, “Abandon us, abandon her friends, and continue her journey with them instead.”
“Yeah… heh…” Josho chuckled, wincing from his bruises. “That would be a fun romp. Hey, look it this way, bubble streak.” He smirked in her direction. “With freaks like that, you’re bound to have three times as many explosions.”
Rainbow Dash’s wings coiled tightly. “What…” She almost hissed the words out. “What if… I gave them exactly what they want?”
Josho blinked. “Look, I wasn’t trying to be serious, shortround…”
“What are you saying, Rainbow?” Eagle Eye asked, his face full of fright.
“Simple…” Rainbow Dash spoke with a deep breath. “I’ll fly to them.”
“Rainbow!” Belle stood up from her chair. “No! Out of the question!” Pilate stood nervously beside her as she exclaimed, “I don’t care how much harm they’ve done to this team! Don’t do something like that! Don’t sacrifice yourself out of guilt--”
“I didn’t say anything about giving myself up, ding dong!” Rainbow Dash retorted. “I know these punks are just that--punks. If anything, I’m gonna save Kera with my own hooves and totally teach them a lesson!”
“Oh…” Belle blushed furiously, her face hung between a grimace and a frown. “Of course you will…”
“I can see where they are at all times, right?” Rainbow Dash pointed in some vaguely western direction. “And, well, odds are they’re gonna use more collateral on me than some stupid book. They know we need that tome to run the ship, but they also know how precious my friends are to me.”
Pilate nodded. “They’ll hold Kera as ransome.”
Rainbow gulped. “Yeah. Pretty much.”
“How do you intend to snatch her from their hooves once you reach them? If you reach them?” Roarke asked. “Or the book for that matter?”
“I’ll… y’know…” Rainbow Dash gestured wildly. “Bash some heads n’stuff!”
Roarke frowned. “I asked you a serious question. The least you could give me is a serious answer.”
“I just did!”
“How do you even expect to get close to the book?! Even when it’s a mile away, the energy from that damn thing makes you collapse like a drowning fish.”
“Oh. Yeah.” Rainbow’s ears folded as she gazed guiltily away. “That.”
“You’ve been through so much as it is, Rainbow,” Eagle Eye said. “We can’t expect you to risk tooth and hoof over a long distance suicide run.”
“Do we really have any other option?” Ebon asked. “This ship may not be able to catch up with those guys, but Rainbow sure can!”
“Not by herself, she won’t,” Roarke said.
Rainbow flashed the bounty hunter a double-take. “Huh?”
“Face it. This isn’t a journey worth taking alone,” Roarke said. “And once you get within proximity of the target, you’re going to need somepony you can rely on who’ll not be susceptible to the effects of the enchanted book.”
“Heh… yeah… and you’ve got an idea in mind, Roarke most Rare?”
Her Searonese brow simply furrowed over her eye-lenses.
Rainbow Dash blinked. “You gotta be kidding me…”
“Do I look like a joker to you?”
“Err…”
Roarke glanced up. “Hey. Gorgeous.”
“Y-yes?” Belle stammered.
Roarke frowned. “The other gorgeous.”
“Oh…” Belle blushed.
Props leaned in. “Phwee?”
“I need as many fuel canisters as you can muster.”
“Phwee!” Props hopped up on the table and bounded off towards the stairwell beyond the kitchen.
“Pilate, we’re also going to need maps, soundstones, and perhaps even a way to chart the stars.” Roarke pivoted about. “Ebon, I know you’ve been talking about leaving the group soon, but could you fix us something portable to eat over several days?”
Ebon grinned as he scrambled towards the kitchen. “You bet it, Madame Metal!”
“Whoah whoah whoah, hold on!” Rainbow Dash spun and squinted at Roarke. “You’ve been nothing but silent and brooding for days on end. What suddenly turned you into our illustrious leader?”
“I don’t know if you heard me the first time,” Roarke growled. “But I’ve run out of ponies worth killing. You wanna save that little green bush with a horn or what?”
“Well…” Rainbow glanced nervously at her two best friends across the table. “Of c-course! But…”
“Then we’re going to stick together through this whole thing or else we’re not coming back at all!” Roarke’s eye-lenses pistoned forward threateningly. “Or would you like me to force you to do the killing once we meet up with these wastes of sperm?”
Rainbow gulped. “No, ma’am.”
“Good.” Roarke trotted through the kitchen and headed towards the hangar where her weapons were stockpiled. “Then pull your wings out of your plot and get ready for some much-needed exercise.”
Rainbow Dash trotted limply after her, pretending to not be glancing at her own waist.
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Roarke's the new tyrant of this motley crew, then. I am perfectly okay with this.
Ooh, I am loving Searonese respect, man.
Fifty four-count flutter-kicks, ):(. Knock 'em out!
Four lines of Roarke/Props interaction, and it's my new favorite friendship. Who'd have thunk?
IloveRoarkeIloveRoarkeIloveRoarkesooomuch.
My little Austraeoh: Friendship is badass.
3292119
and two of them were "Phwee"!
why is Rainbow sneaking glances at her belly? because Josho called her "shortround"?
3292195.
Probably because of the "much needed excercise."
Those asshole Harbingers are awful utilitarians. They claim to be using "greater good" reasoning but then claim they have a divine right. You can't be a utilitarian and believe in divine rights to anything!
Rainboarke OTP <3
Dash and Pilate just agreed with what we have been saying about the Eljun Bureau since the beginning. Will be interesting to see Rainboarke chase the Bureau.
~bass
"Do these rainbow stripes make my ass look big?"
Im wondering, given how many flames RD has absorbed, how difficult it would be to plumb the element into the engine, then get RD to attempt a Boom. Assuming the feedback through Belles and Pilates Oasis control loop allows RD to feel the Nancy Jane, become the brain ship?
Oh, wait. Rourke gets to Boom some zealots. Carry on.
I'M BAAAACK!!!!! And what a great bunch of chapters I missed. These guys are not Zadubadabu, they are just dirty imposters. No Zadubadabu Pegasus would do this. These guys are most certainly gonna be some great characters to see go boom by way of Roarke most rare. Carry on IC, carry on.
And I'm caught up! <- the number of comments like this over these stories is going to make newbies reading this years from now feel even more epic!
3292195
Because Roarke makes her nips hard.
Didn't nightshade use pegasi or something to generate a flame? What if they try seeing if her pendant is a power source?
3293135 Yes, use the Element as a power source and let Dash's Discord infection run rampant. Awesome idea.
3293472
Well, she might have to squat inside it for a while...
3293472 Just use discord-Rainbow as the power source then.
3293759Thanks, I appreciate it.
3293548 That would be impractical and potentially unsafe. Remember the room where Dash was kept in Blue Shelf?
I'm getting a distinctly Bioshock Infinite feel from this arc.
3293135
Of course.
Now everybody is trying to get some of the flame action.
Yeah, I'm gonna have to steal "Phwee!"
Also, Rainbow and Roarke going off on their own for a bit?
It is interesting seeing Rainbow be the bottom in a duo, though.
So Mister Mc Elksome has travelled to the edge of the world once. I realize the world is smaller to the north and south than it is to the weast and east but still - that is a pretty damn remarkable feat right there, just saying.
The power of the ruby flame it contains sure didn't hurt either.
The annoying thing is that Rainbow has been in the position of strength throughout the entire ordeal. Not only because religious people are actually supposed to listen to their messiah, but because they absolutely need her. She has all that it takes to blackmail them: "If you attack my friends, I will not continue flying until you've stopped it. If you kill my friends, I will either root you out or I will die trying to avenge them. In either case, the world will end and it will be your fault." If she was just cold-blooded enough to understand that from this predicatement, the cult cannot even risk to threaten her the prospect of killing Kera, she could actually resolve the issue quite easily - and probably wouldn't be the Austraeoh in the first place.
3292272 A shame to good old hedonism is what it is! I feel dishonoured.
3293975 I do hope he was joking, anyway. Trying to use Discord as a power source for an airship would be like tying your surfboard to a shark.
3294550 She tried pulling that card and they basically said 'buck you'. They have no particular interest in her coming willingly and seem certain they can defeat her physically at any time.
So you're saying it would be awesome?
Nothing like a good, old fashioned "travel there, beat the baddies, save the girl" adventure.
And with Rainbow and Roarke the ones to do it? This is gonna be good.
3295386>>3294550
The Infinite Improbability Drive comes to mind.
3295743
There actually is a story, it might be The Hitchikers Guide To The Galaxy, pony style, where.. ah, but youll have to read it to find out.
Ahhhh, when there are targets worth killing, Rorke is on the job!
IIIIIt's Dashie's evaluation time!
Alright, we've got a plan! Dash never stays down for long anyways. And I like the side of Roarke that we get to see here. Not that important, but cool all the same. These are my thoughts so far.
-MASH
Yes! Rainboarke (is this what we're calling it, now? It sounds like someone trying to say rain and then burping partway through. Its...quite fitting) team-up!
And come one, last chapter Rainbow was referred to as "petite" - not all ponies can cheat and just make themselves half metal to skip time in the gym.
Glad that there's a plan of action in place - not that anyone has to worry about Kera. The little imp has probably already picked a new target to pester now that she's been separated from Simon, and the squirrel has given her plenty of target practice.
I feel like Simon should stow away to somewhere to help Rainbow and Roarke get Kera back. But I acknowledge that's just me wanting Simon and Kera to be BFFs.
3297501
I assume you're referring to this one.
I started using Phwee long before I read this. Booyah.
Now, let's go get Kera!
-Spirit
Hopefully this all works. It'd be a shame if it didn't.
"pull your wings out of your plot"
That just oozed with full metal jacket hilariousness
All Roarke needs is a 'I don't know but I've been told' chant and she's well on her way to being drill sergeant of the year.
Alright, sidequest! Little sub-arc that's gonna take them out of Grey Smoke and get 'em all down and dirty with those fuckin cultists.
Well, "'em" being Roarke and Rainbow, at the least...
I was going to link a scene from Family Guy, from the episode where the Drunken Clam was going to get shut down. The part where Joe, peter and the others try raising money with a salon/spa treatment. Couldn't find it...poor Rainbow, I'm sure she isn't all that pudgy/ they've been on the run for a long time now with little to no supplies AND she's been flying a lot on her own wings. She has had her exercise.
This is nothing a sonic rainboom or two can't solve.
Well, it has been a while. I feel as though every time I come back to this story, there is an entire new book. Maybe I feel that way because it is true. For the third time, I am diving in. I will catch up one day. See you all soon.
...Eagle Eye?
So...not Eagle Eye then?
"The *other* other gorgeous."
Eagle Eye: "Hey!"
Yup, regroup and counterattack.
Edit: and this
is the quote I used for my 'back of the napkin' calculations in a very flawed attempt to guess how large the Distance that Rainbow flew was.
05/21/2017 02:05 UTC
Im really enjoying Roarkes and RDs interactions.
They are so...straight to the point.
"Serious question. Serious answer...wait, you were being serious? Faust help us..."
I wonder if Faust is the alicorn God on their Harmony world?
Hmm...
Well,a lot has happened in a short time. But damn do I live getaway vehicles, or any kind of aiborn vehicles for that matter.
If I could, I'd live life on the air, strafing the currents and braving the blazing horizons like a shooting star!
The dichotomy between Roarke and Rainbow Dash is quite interesting. Though their core moral beliefs don't quite mesh, they both equally care about something that is beyond their person and have different ways of expressing that. And Roarke's willingness to kill these false Eljunbyro seems to go beyond the thrill of killing, unlike when she was only looking out only for herself and Imre. She is willing to shoulder the burden of others death for Rainbow Dash, who doesn't want to take it that far despite having to do so in the past. In this way, Roarke epitomizes Rainbow Dash's hostility for the false Eljunbryo.
Ohhhh yeah. More Roarke and Rainbow for me