Princess Luna, a mare history has long since scorned, always playing second fiddle to her older sister.
Trixie Lulamoon, an egotistical trickster of a mare, hated by Ponyville and most of Equestria for some tricks that got out of hoof.
Both mares, different in almost every way except for just one thing: they want to show the world that they belong. All they did was crave love and admiration, but instead they were cast aside and looked down upon. Together, maybe now they can show everypony their true potential.
Cover art by Graphic-Lee
Edited by Phaoray
Idea's bounced off The Great Eater
Chapters (26)
Trixie and Luna? Just as bad as a Trixie and Twilight. Fucking gross.
That said, looking beyond your poor taste in shipping here, I did enjoy Spell to Happiness to a degree, and you're a solid enough writer. The concept of a dual redemption is a premise that gives you plenty of play room, as both characters need it, (Trixie needs to be doused in lava is my personal preference, but we can't always get what we want) or at least it can be argued.
I love your stuff, but I'm going to have to sit this one out, sorry.
3150276
That's alright! I understand not everyone likes everyship but I thought this one was interesting enough to try my hand at writing
I'm glad you liked Spell to a degree, the sequel is being mapped out right now so I hope you'll enjoy it better
3150309 Well, I'm interested. I can hardly wait until the next chapter. I just hope you are willing and able to finish this story.
3151202
I'm glad to hear you liked it! Luckily, I am written a bit ahead, so I hope that I can actually keep a regular once a week posting schedule going
This is an interesting idea; one I've never heard of before, really. I'm anxious to know what happens next.
3150276 In that case, begone, you foul wretch who obviously lacks the ability to love and tolerate!
And don't let the door hit you on the way out!
3151202
Don't worry I'm his pre-reader and I'll keep him on the straight and narrow. No spoilers, but I can say that it is shaping up to be a really cool fic. I highly enjoy reading the stuff that's been done so far.
3152047
You won't be disappointed. Trust me
.
3150276 Wait what... SHIPPING!? I thought this was going to be an amazing redemption story focused on the development of a platonic Teacher/student relationship between Trixie and Luna as it built from the ground up..... Shipping.... does it really have to be shipping?*whine*
Another one bites the dust...
Pretty interesting story. Luna is rather proactive, which is nice to see. Trixie's generosity was a bit unexpected, but her finding the moment to be a hero was very impressive. I like to believe that Trixie is the sort of individual who steps up to the plate when the situation calls for a hero.
Hmm, wonder what Luna would have thought if she'd recognized who Trixie's dream aggressor really was. I'm expecting the story to bring up that bit. Would be interesting to see Luna torn between loyalties.
Will follow. Expecting good stuff.
3154620
I'm glad you liked it so far! Without going to far into the story, we will learn a bit about Trixie that will make her actions seem a lot more... justified I guess you could say!
Very good opening chapter. I was kind of surprised when the giant in the dream was not Twilight, but I can understand her feeling powerless when the Amulet enhanced her magic so much. Plus it did corrupt her so I could definitely see some lingering effects. Sad to have to wait to see what happens next, but I will have something to look forward to on Friday at least.
Very good first chapter, looking forward to the rest.
3155413
I'm glad you liked it! Well for the most part, the dream represents her fear that she will be trapped in the shadow of her actions under the influence of the Alicorn amulet, so I figured a giant Trixie would be a good metaphor
3155606
I'm glad you liked it
3155847
The dream Trixie made sense, just I haven't really seen someone use that fear over a fear of being inadequate compared to Twilight yet so it is fairly original in my book. Also quite glad this is a ship as I think it has the potential to finally be a good Luna x Trixie. I've read some that were half-way decent, but they always messed it up either by speeding through the romance and just having them suddenly like eachother, or make them both go out of character to make it work. Can't wait to see what occurs next!
You're definitely off to an interesting start! I love redemption stories, and seeing Luna take a proactive stance towards the possible redemption of Trixie (and by extension, herself) is an idea I'm looking forward to seeing play out. I also like the concept of Luna taking Trixie on as her student, creating a counterpart to the Princess Celestia-Twilight Sparkle relationship. Your writing is excellent, easily sets the scene without getting bogged down in excess detail, and flows very well. Your characterization is also solid, giving consistent, multidimensional views of both Trixie and Luna as opposed to caricatures. Trixie's insecurities and genuine good-heartedness (beneath her boastfulness) along with Luna's grace mixed with exuberant eagerness are spot-on with their canon portrayals.
All in all, I very much look forward to seeing where you take this story. Keep up the great work!
i390.photobucket.com/albums/oo345/stryke81/MLP/346806__safe_princess252Bcelestia_comic_trixie_idw_spoiler-colon-comic_spoiler-colon-comic08.jpg
3159635
Waking up and seeing your comment first thing in the morning made my day! Chapter 2 will focus on Luna, and than chapter 3 will focus on Trixie and I tried to flesh out their characters a little bit more in their individual chapters so hopefully it'll expand on them without making them act out of character!
3155955
I know what you mean. So far, for what I have planned out the relationship will be on a slow burner so don't expect any "you're a good student Trixie. But a better lover!" Type stuff
Also, staying on character is one of my big focuses and I've already gone over each chapter multiple times with a fine tooth comb double checking how they react to different stuff. 
Oh my goodness, the rookie fainted.
The image of Celestia with Pinkie Pie's mane style and color.
Poor noob rookie, everyone picks on the rookies.
Celestia with Pinkie's mane...that would explain so much. CELESTIA IS A SECRET PIE!!!!
The fun, it shall be doubled! ...WE STILL NEED A LUNA EMOTICON!!!
How about Old Time Rock n Roll?
)
(It worked for Tom Cruise.
3166294
That's a pretty good one!
Double update all the way, so intense.
Still liking this, yes.
Are there any other requirements for the song? Cuz I have some songs I'd recommend, but there are either no lyrics or they're hard to understand
3167223
I was hoping for lyrics so that I could have someone sing them, but if they're not to hard to understand go ahead and post them and I'll see if I can use it
3167250
Okay, well this is one of my more favorite songs by this artist
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysOwxqe6pf0
3167250
Here are some recommendations that I have
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ScLVtsi0cfc&lc=VIssEM_MQLRj3KyGG36lIibIYA_cZ9DXXAflZLOCpsI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GtDipOmQZA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oarDrGoJ4dA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysOwxqe6pf0
If these don't meet your expectations, want me to keep looking?
This is awesome!! Ive read this whole story and I have almost no criticism!!
Lets start off with what I like. First the writing is amazing, your style is perfect, you have a way of writing that is stupendous. Next, the story idea itself is genius and well implemented. I am a huge fan of Trixie X Luna fics and this one is defiantly may favorite so far. I've got mixed views on the bat-ponies, I think they are not only well implemented but original too. Its just a little detail but I really like the way that you describe how the armor reacts with movements, Its just a little detail but I think makes the story seem just that much better. The scene with the star model was genius, original, and well written. The whole out of body spiritual thing (can't remember the name) is also amazing, it puts an original spin on Luna's dream walking abilities. The Celestia bed scene, priceless! Last I think your overall characterization of most of the characters is spot on, I especially liked Luna. There is a lot more that I like about this fic but the list is too big to name it all, so these are just my favorites.
Things that I think can be improved: First, is my other feelings with the bat-ponies, they are physically detailed well but we get no background about them. They need more details about them like; does being a bat-pony effect them mentally, how does one become a bat pony or are you born one, are they basically pony vampires, do they have special talents that regular ponies don't have? Stuff like that. Next I feel like either later on silver will be adopted by Trixie or we will newer see her again, an OC created for one scene isn't good in my eyes. The only characterization I think is off is Trixie, she seems a little too out of character for me. To be specific she isn't as showy as she usually is, and you commonly see her characterized as not excepting any help with saying she doesn't want anybodies pity (this is how the fandom seems to characterize her so its more of a suggestion, but being original is key). There is a little more about Trixie but it isn't important enough to write. This is a little nit-picky but when you say that the filly screamed loud enough for it to be heard from Canterlot castle by Luna, and no one else seems to notice is a little fishy. Finally I found a few errors in the story like missing a space or capitalization. There was not a lot but there were some. I remember seeing possible grammar mistakes but I can't remember where.
Overall.... SPECTACULAR story!!!
-Michael A.
Note: My opinions are based on the writing so far so they could be fixed easily in later chapters. Also these are my opinions so not everyone will agree with me.
3167438
First off, I am glad you like it! I have big plans for this story so I hope I can keep you hooked until the end!
Second off, I think I shall address a few of your worries
Trixie will grow to know the bat-ponies better, so they will have much more of their back story, physical and mental traits worked out as Trixie grows to know them. I have a lot already written on their race's back story and individual personality's so we will see a lot of them throughout the story.
As for Silver Star, We will see her again, and learn about more of her back story throughout this story as well, but I don't think I'll spoil my plans for this little filly just yet. I also changed Luna's location in Canterlot, I had meant to do it but got so wrapped up in writing that I never went back and changed it
Also about Trixie, I imagined that after the Alicorn amulet, she would be a lot more uncertain of herself and hesitate to be the boasting Trixie we know. I've tried keeping her boastful, but make it seem like she's not as certain about who she is anymore, and I plan to make her grow quite a bit in this fic. She will start off as wanting to be the old Trixie, Confident and boastful, but will grow into a much better mare after realizing that she can be as strong as she pretended to be and doesn't need to rub everypony's nose in it!
I hope that's helped shed a little light on the direction the story will be going later
If you'd like to point out any errors, I'll be more than happy to go back and fix them!
3167378
Hmm I might be able to use that booty swing one, but I gotta say I love this type of music! You've given me a few new fav's
Do you happen to like swing step by any chance?
Well, depending on the kind of music that you personally enjoy, maybe one of these songs would suffice?
"You Drive Me Nervous" By Alice Cooper
"Hang On To Yourself" By David Bowie
"Killer Queen" By Queen
I mean, only one of these songs got any airplay on the radio, but I don't know if that really matters, or not.
Oh! If Trixie will be singing along then I've got another idea...
"Bohemian Rhapsody" By Queen
EDIT : Sorry! Completely forgot to tell you that I think you're doing a splendid job on the story, thus far! Keep up the good work!
they whine like a soiled filly!
Although this certainly makes for some amusing imagery, are you sure you don't mean "spoiled"?
3167530
You have an excellent choice in music!
3166294
So far, this is the best choice that I am clubbing myself over the head for not thinking of first!
3167514
I'm glad I did. And do you mean the dance? Or is it a genre? Cuz I haven't heard of it
3167598
Well it's a like a sub genre of dubstep I guess you could say. It combines heavy bass with old Swing style music, and what you linked me reminded me a lot of that style so I was just curious f you were a fan of it
3167572
No I meant soiled
Like a filly that's wet their diaper lol
3167611 Just checking. Your way might actually be funnier but you have to admit they are two pretty different things to say, so I wanted to make sure it wasn't a typo.
3167610
Oh okay. I probably have heard it and just not realized it
3167626
This is a pretty good example of Swingstep!
3167638
Oh, I've heard Caravan Palace before, just not this song
3167506
I really do, and trust me you already got me hooked. And I wouldn't classify it as worries, more of things that I think could be improved upon. So far in the story there is nothing that I flat out dislike.
Okay I guessed that you were going to go somewhere with them in the future but I still wanted to point it out to make sure. They have a lot of potential and I'm really looking forward to seeing where you go with it.
You not denying the adoption theory! Ha, but seriously I'm glad that you are going to have Silver Star be more in the story. As I stated before, I hate it when authors create OC's that pop-up out of nowhere for one important scene and then dump them. If you have to make a character up just to fit a one scene, unless its key to the story, I just don't like it (This is not to say that there aren't any exceptions *Cough-Zecora-Cough*). On a little off topic note, I don't like to when authors create character for their story that pop-up out out of no where and arn't properly introduced earlier in the story/series, example Cadence and Shining Armor.
Hey I'm glad that I was able to point that out for you, trust me there are people on this site who will write death threats for those simple details, trust me on this I've seen someone try to rip apart a great fic with small details like those.
I actually like your reasoning for characterizing Trixie. If you follow that I take almost everything I said back, but I still think you should add more boasting scenes in though, more of that classic Trixie flare. I like to see her growth and redemption but, are you going to have a backstory for Trixie? I personally prefer it when she had a bad childhood and created her persona to hide her insecurities, and her 'Mask' eventually becomes her like on and off the stage. With a backstory like this it just makes her redemption more earned rather then given.
Okay, as of now I'll comment any spelling or grammar mistakes that I see from now on. If/when I end up rereading the previous chapters I will point them out as well.
Anyway again I want to say how much of an awesome fic I think this is and I will continue my support. This story is already awesome and I think that it has potential to become even greater. I look forward to reading more! Thank you and have a great day. Oh and I went back and fixed the spelling and stuff with my previous comment, just saying.
-Michael A.
Note: I forgot to mention this is the first comment but the scene with Luna taunting Celestias guards was ("drop it") written kinda confusingly. In the end I only had a vague image of what happened, It could just be me though. Also i hope that you don't mind my long comments. When I review I tend to go all out and include everything I see.
3167578
Well thank you! I mean, I chose some pretty well-known/commercial artists for the songs that I recommended, because I also, kind of, figured that nopony would get a reference made towards a song performed by a band like "Wayne County & The Electric Chairs" ^^.
Anyways, moving on... So this is another Trixie Redemption story, right? I ask because I'm kind of curious if it'll follow the same formula that others of it's make do.
I'm not saying the plot isn't original, it's just that I've noticed a trend where Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity never really apologize for what they did. You know? I mean, of course you can't blame these ponies for the Alicorn Amulet scandal, but it always irritates me how hardly nopony else ever acknowledges just what those three did in Trixie's debut episode.
Trixie was, of course, wrong for humiliating the three of them, and she deserved to be shown up by Twilight. I mean she didn't deserve to lose her house, job, and reputation, but I'd rather not talk about that for too much longer, lest I get distracted. It's just that when Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Rarity went up onto that stage their intention was to humiliate/show up Trixie in front of her audience. Sure, Applejack, and Rarity may of also been pissed off at what had become of Rainbow Dash, but still, they wanted to show Trixie up. Their intentions weren't pure.
Anyway! That was just my two cents, and thanks for reading my comment!
(P.s. I was drunk when I typed this up, so pardon me if my wording sounds... Off.)
EDIT : Okay, I more carefully thought over what I had said, and realized that, even by my own logic, they didn't really do anything... I'm not going to say that "It was because I was drunk" since that's not the kind of person I am. I just goofed up, is all.
But yeah, you can just forget what I had said earlier (Well, if you want to I mean). I was probably over-thinking things again.
3168410
Well I see it how you do, she was putting on a show and they kinda let it become personal, when it shouldn't. But in this story, Trixie will be doing most of her redemption in Canterlot, but I think she might make a stop in Ponyville, but I'm honestly not sure what I will do with Aj, Rarity and Dash... I'll have to ponder on this
3167638
Are you still deciding what songs you should use? Cuz I just thought of a person you might like.
3196292
Sure
what's the song?
3198448
There are some songs from Imogen Heap's Speak for Yourself that are really good to listen to while reading that I think should be used
that song was old when I was a filly.
I guess that, unlike humans, ponies have had rock and roll since the Stone Age.
images.sodahead.com/profiles/0/0/2/4/1/7/1/2/3/rimshot-83965485661.jpeg
3199187
forum.reachingperfection.com/file/n3251064/129923751541-MLP_I_see_what_you_d.jpg
The old classic old time rock and roll routine. Never gets old and one of my favorite songs.
Nice go with the test, the painting part was perfect. Interesting way to deepen the understanding of a character. Carry on the good work!
What is that, french? What's it suppose to mean?
How was that possible? Most of the instruments in that song, weren't even invented yet, when Luna was a filly.
Trixie must be a real Sherlock Holmes. I know I didn't get that much from what I read.
I look forward to the next chapter. I like how this is going so far.
3199366
Yes it is french, and It means You startled me!
Also, she was exaggerating about that song being old when she was a filly
She's just saying Trixie apparently has old taste 