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And they lived happily ever after. Well, sort of. Princess Cadance and Shining Armor are finding that running the Crystal Empire is a far more challenging task then either of them had ever anticipated.
A series of stand alone short stories detailing the day to day life of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Captain Shining Armor.
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Sim City like kingdom building and bureaucracy? You're writing about two of my favorite topics.
Celestia is right. A sound economic policy is needed. What sort of exports can the Empire provide. How can it encourage tourism?
To be honest I was trying to think about it and I have trouble saying one way or the other what ponies really do. Obviously they're fairly low key economically. They'd never depict poverty seriously in a show for little kids and I can imagine that if everyone knew what they were quite literally 'born to do' that Celestia could make sure that noone is going hungry.
We've seen money but, without getting in to too technical terms of it, I'm not sure what they're using it for beyond just a helpful medium of exchange. We've seen barter and haggling but the prices are hard to go by since the only thing they apparently ever trade for is food on the show. So I can't possibly figure out what the value of a bit is.
So in the end I'm left to just hand wave it and assume that the wealth distribution is even enough so that bits changing hands never seriously puts anyone out on the street but that the society is advanced enough that a pure barter system would be impractical. Its possible that the Crystal Empire ponies are especially good at finished goods (and probably know how to make authentically ancient looking things that might sell for a lot). Since they're surrounded by ice all around they're not going to be getting a lot of raw materials anyway.
Also they probably don't need a whole lot of money because ponies don't have pockets.
LoL! Best line
You've made a very strong start. The characters are well-written, neither OOC nor cliche. The premise is original, and has a lot of potential. There are a few problems, though.
First, you might consider adding more details and descriptions, to give the reader a clearer mental picture of what's going on.
Second, a grammar and spelling check would be useful. It's hardly a deal-breaker, but it would give the story a more polished appearance.
Keep at it, I'm interested to see what you do with this!
Now this is the Shining and Cadance story I've been waiting for. Unique premise, plenty of interaction during their married years, and romantic comedy atmosphere. I see a lot of potential in this story, so you really earned this fave.
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I also think-
....
...
Nope. You pretty much summed up my thoughts as well!
- To author-
Only noticed a capitalization error (i'm ) So pretty well written and smooth!
Love it ^_^
Gonna keep on my follow list due to content and execution, which are both good; but do treat yourself to a prereader to catch capitalization, apostrophe and comma use trouble. The technical rough spots are pulling me out of immersion in what otherwise seems like a fun story.
*Grins* Very cute premise and idea. I'm really enjoying the characterization of Cadence and Shining and it feels very natural and true to them on how they're handling the (newish) empire. I did spot some typos that I'll pm to you and suggest you perhaps consider an editor or pre-reader for assistance since you're very solid in the story department
Just so you know (and let my inner grammar Nazi vent a bit), the singular for pegasi is pegasus
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Thanks for the catch!
One of the best shipping stories in here!
A minor nitpick, but I don't think there are any Crystal Pegasi or Unicorns. At least, there were none on screen during the Crystal Empire episodes. I don't particularly mind this bit of artistic license, but I couldn't leave it unsaid.
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Huh. I went back and looked at the episodes and I have to admit that you're right. I can't believe I never noticed that before actually.
Perhaps being a crystal pony is a quality you get by being born in the Crystal Empire and that most of them are just earth types by default? The darker possible 'fandom' explanation would be that Sombra was very particular in removing possible resistance from among the populace (thus explaining part of Shimmer's situation) and targeted the unicorns and pegasi. But I'd like to avoid including genocide in the mostly fluffy romance story so...never mind.
Most likely the animators didn't feel like recreating Crystal pony version of pegasi and unicorns for the sake of background animation. All the sparkles are probably a bit a of a pain to recreate.
The big crystal heart also made the entire cast look like crystal ponies (at least for a little while and its probably where I assumed you could have all three types) in the two part opening of season 3 so who knows how that really works. In the future I'll keep it in mind but I think its fair to say that crystal/regular ponies will be moving in and out of the Empire anyway to give the various background ponies at least a little diversity. I'll run out of gem names and colors to give them otherwise if they're all the same type.
hmmm nice....some errors but nice......will be interesting as they rebuild the economy since a good portion was probably mining, which mane now would fear
"And we are very happy to be here, mademoiselle Cadence."
Unless Reneigh was trying to insult Cadance (which there was no indication of her doing), the word she should have used was madame. Mademoiselle is a term used exclusively for unmarried women and girls and madame is for married women.
(I had to learn all this back when I had a French class almost a decade ago, and I get to use it a bit while writing a Prench pony myself)
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Thats what I get for trying to sneak in parts of a language I don't speak. Nope, that wasn't my intent. Thank you for the catch.
Great new chapter. It was more than what I was expecting, but that's great. It's always beautiful to see more married Cadance and Shining interaction, especially over these kinds of royal duties. That shower paparazzi scene was hilarious.
What's this? Celestia trolling them again? Hopefully Shining and Cadance will come up with an ideal way to get back at her soon!
This is a very endearing story; keep up the good work!
You have made politics more interesting....by adding ponies! XD
Awesome chapter!
Another good one. However, you may want to give it another once-over, since I caught a few 'then' s where there should be 'than's, and a couple of sentences may need to be structured better. Still, though, this story is, as you said sweet and cute. Quite the winner
Historically, being the first culture to offer banking services has gotten you burned at the stake.
"Our anniversary isn't until next week either." Dang, Shining. I'm impressed.
This is exactly the Shining Armor and Cadence fic I have been wanting to read for ages. I love the slice of life and "getting the Crystal Empire going" bits. The portrayal of the main characters and introduced ones has been delightful as well.
I also appreciate that you've taken the time to think about just how badly Sombra screwed things up before he was deposed. I'm a sucker for worldbuilding so this has been a treat to read. Have you given thought to if the Empire, being a thousand years out of date, has had some of the same adjustments Luna had to go through? Language and technological shifts? It's touched on briefly with the railroad here, but that actually made me think about the show and realize it's a little inconsistent between Luna with her archaic sounding language and what we've seen of the empire. I was just curious as to your thoughts on that since you've given other things some deeper thought.
Anyway, it's a really great fic I am glad to have stumbled across. Please keep it up!
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I have thought about it actually. While it might be interesting to discuss the sort of technological advancements you see in the space of 1000+ years I don't think it would necessarily fit here.
Unless the ponies were living in mud huts in Equestria I can't think of anything that must have changed that drastically in the time between the Crystal Empire being cursed and its reappearing. Apart from some one-off gags throughout the show, (the Hydroelectric Dam springs to mind), Equestria seems to be pretty firmly in a pre-industrial sort of mindset. Even the railroad is just being run by a team of ponies. There are no cars or factories of any sort that we've seen.
So in the end I've had to conclude that Celestia, helped by how ponies in the show are, has designed society to prevent such advancements. The whole banking argument is a part of that and sort of my 'answer'. The ability to loan money is incredibly useful if you want to make a factory, for instance. I could speak forever on the subject of how one goes from pre-industrial to industrial but in the end I think Celestia made the decision to block it. Harmony, as a philosophy and quasi-religion, are likely the prevailing forces. Thousands of Rarities in a sweatshop bent over sowing machines for hours is not likely something Celestia wants, regardless of how many coats or dresses you might get out of it.
Since ponies are already happy finding their special talent and there is no real reason for it, beyond the sort of progress Acumen would want (for money and power which aren't things most ponies are after anyway) I don't see ponies becoming industrial anytime soon unless Acumen got his way. I'm not a Luddite though, I'm rather fond of my ipod and car. The ponies seem to have been dealt a hand that allows them to easily achieve a near utopia. I can do plenty of dark and depressing stories (and am working on a few) but this isn't one of them.
tinyurl.com/mbho6go
It lives! ...says the guy who can't get one of his own stories back on the rails after months of hiatus (my excuse is a bit more personal, though: it's a bit hard to write while in mourning and then I just got distracted by other things).
Anyway, a few typos:
(Not really a typo but a request for clarification) perhaps even star crossed lovers
I didn't know fate was fighting as hard as it could to keep them apart...Especially after they got married.
He fitfully tugged at the tight color for a few seconds.
you mean collar?
Shining found that hilarious adorable
hilariously adorable, perhaps?
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The typos have been fixed, there always seems to be a few no matter how hard I scour the text for them.
And I admit that I may have misused the phrase. To be fair they've been attacked on two separate occasions by ancient evil forces. One of which actively was trying to screw up their wedding.
Sorry to hear you've hit a slump in your own writing. Hope everything's been going alright for you, mourning sounds rather ungood.
Hmmm I think Acumen may just be the ponification of Petyr Baelish. If he wants gold so badly we ought to give it to him, we'll make him live and breathe gold and eat gold until he can't no more.
In all seriousness, I'm sure the paparazzi would appreciate some tips on their Prime Minister's whereabouts, and it only takes one mistimed monologue to spill the beans to the rest of the realm.
If Shining and Cadance have a Baelish, they need a Varys or Tyrion who's loyalty is solely to the realm, and as the realm is tied to harmony I'm quite certain they'd be safe from their own Varys' or Tyrion's machinations.
Found a typo- the only one!
"the major barely seemed to blink atl."
at all*
calling it now that Cadence is pregnant. A bit miffed if that's the case....because it's kinda expected....but still amusing.
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Fortunately ponies are a little nicer than the characters in game of thrones. I was actually trying to make Acumen appear more sympathetic. He's not entirely wrong about his plan, it might even work. His plan is to make the Crystal Empire an actual power, screw harmony. Cadence and Shining are loyal to Celestia. While they might not feel like they aren't, they basically would appear like puppets to Celestia and Equestria. The crystal ponies don't have the benefit of a millennium of Pax Equstriana so their perspective is unlikely to view Celestia in the perfect light that her subjects do. Yay moral ambiguity.
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Typo fixed, thanks.
Also what an interesting guess. In all fairness there is hardly another direction that a story like this could go, if it was the way I wanted to take it. I've hardly seen a story that even includes that. But have no fear, there's no Princess Skyla on the horizon. But really, how else are Shining and Cadence going to continue the royal rule over CE? They're not immortal after all.
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No prob =)
It was the kind of plot thing that I'd expect- but true.....it WOULD need to be on the horizon.
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You know I was almost expecting something like that being revealed in today's episode.
Though it would almost be cruel to write about them having a kid. A poor child like that having to deal with six godmothers. I should tag this as a darkfic.
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I haven't seen the episode yet 0_0 (going to watch it this evening)
that....would be horrifying.
Poor Shining Armor at the end there. He just can't take anymore.
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I've actually given it thought that it would be silly to think of what is essentially a city state as an empire. Now obviously its just naming convention for what the show creators/ Hasbro thought sounded good. But if you want to do advanced word building or headcanoning, and we all do, then I had a reasonable sounding solution. Something I even started to imply with the latest chapter. Specifically that the Crystal Empire was not just its capital city.
The only reason they even have a city up that far north is because of the magical barrier. They presumably built it themselves, unless you want to suggest that there was always some massive magical monolith structure that projected a bubble. It probably involves crystals as well. Crystal ponies appear to be especially talented at building things, the high speed train thing in the last episode seems to suggest that. So pre-Sombra there was most likely a whole network of Crystal Empire towns and cities spread throughout the arctic north. Once the main city went down they would probably go down as well, the crystal ponies forced into heading south to avoid freezing to death. Over 1000 years of exile would remove all trace of the towns and the ponies. Like they never existed, even if you wanted to assume being crystal was genetic and not magic.
That's just my idea anyway. I doubt the crystal ponies would want to keep a name that their Pony Hitler came up with so it is most likely the original name. As for why there aren't large history dump lessons in this story specifically...well, I didn't originally intend for Affairs of State to be more than cutesy slice-of-life tales. But I also happen to have another headcanon that is a bit more of a stretch about why crystal ponies don't talk about the past.
Anyway, I hope that all doesn't come off as insane ramblings. Thank you for the favorite and the interest in the story!
Everyone goes for the esoteric government stuff, what is Acumen up to,is a city state an Empire. Lets go for the important stuff.
1 Cadence snappy
2. large amounts of perfume
3. jumpy, blushing
conclusion. one of two 1 .pregnant 2. the one with my vote (in heat.)
I don't need an answer will wait for next chapter. Also faved. And up vote
Acumen seems more villainous to me than anything. His only concern seems to be how he can make himself very rich and powerful, and if the Crystal Empire might get more wealth and power at the same time then that just makes his argument look better.
Acumen cares for himself alone. A have decent pony would not use heckling to try and get his point across. Hell Sombra was prime minister once.
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Pretty much what I was going for. Naturally he's a bad guy and pretty clearly does come across as a bad guy. Though I did want to make him at least a bit sympathetic in his goal.
He's a visionary, even a selfish one. He would really believe his plan would work and the important thing is it would. He'd turn the crystal empire into a financial super power assuming Celestia didn't squash them (and she probably wouldn't). The question is about the direction they'd want to take and Cadance and Shining sticking with Celestia.
Ironically I acquired a job at a major bank in between starting the story and now. So I'm well aware of the evilness prevalent in banking institutions. It does do ugly things to people and causes misery to people who lack the ability to avoid instant gratification.
fc01.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2015/053/a/5/fanart_for_affairs_of_state_by_twilightsparkle2013-d8j2m8g.png
I made fanart! I hope you like it!
Roll d20 for persuasion
Nat20, success!
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I see him like the typical government official, actually. Judging by the paperworks he submitted, he seems genuinely patriotic and wants to elevate Crystal Empire into a world stage player instead of some backwater satellite country, but he has that "I want to make the country rich enough so I can write my name in the annals of history and maybe skim a few pennies from the top for my hard work" attitude that's prevalent in politicians.
He's the type of person that's very hard to get rid of in a democratic institution, because the people will keep re-electing them for their short-term gratifications and promises, and genuinely competent enough that the few percent of the total income that he'll definitely steal would be seen by the common populace as "well, , what's a few dollars for all the good things he'd done?".