Outside of the throne room, Discord waited with the other ministers as they all adjusted their assorted robes and wigs, each in different colors according to the ministry the represented. Discord's robes were surprisingly simple, yet menacing in the black and red colors he had chosen to represent his ministry. As usual with him, he wasn't sure why he chose to wear these particular robes, but they simply felt right to him.
The other twenty three ministers were mingling about the entrance way making small talk, and side deals before entering, and it was at this time that Discord went to make his move, "Minister Hard Time! How lovely to see you again, tell me did you get a new mane cut?"
The dull colored minister of the justice frowned at Discord from under her wig as she tightened her grey robes in a huff, "What do you want pest? Can't you see I am a busy mare?
Discord smiled brightly at the perpetual sourpuss as he pulled flowers out of thin air, "Oh come come my dear, you're much to young to have such a dour outlook on life. Smile! It looks good on everypony!"
The Minister of the Justice took the flowers in her hoof and smiled slightly, showing her crooked teeth, Discord then shuddered slightly at the sight before she ate the flowers, "This flattery will get you nowhere. Now again I ask you, Lord Discord, what do you want?"
Discord frowned slightly as he pulled out a sheet of paper and passed it to Hard Time, "I am interested in this prisoner, do you recognize him?"
The minister pulled her spectacles out of a pocket of her robe and placed them on the end of her muzzle, "Hmm, prisoner number A-A-Twenty-Three. Yes, I know of him, he's currently serving a one year sentence without the possibility of parole by order of Celestia. What's your interest in him?"
"Oh, noting important," he said with a smile, "I just felt that the longevity of his punishment was disproportional to his crimes."
Hard Time looked at Discord with a deadpan expression before answering, "You want him for your stupid ministry don't you?"
"NO! I want him to help me make stupid stories... I mean, yes. I want him for my ministry," as he finished the sentence a small, crooked halo appeared over his horns.
"What was that about stupid stories?"
"NOTHING! Er, I mean," he cleared his throat and adjusted his robes, "Nothing. I saw he was an author, and that he worked for the Canterlot Airship Yards. With his chaotic imagination, I can perhaps give him that second chance he needs in life."
Hard Time stuck her muzzle in the air before prancing away from Discord, "I don't think so. You'll just have to wait for his sentence to end in four months."
She then ran straight into Discord, who was quite suddenly in her path, "Why my dear Minister of the Justice, everypony deserves a second chance," as he said the phrase, his eyes swirled in a rainbow of colors, instantly turning the drab minister grey in tone.
Fortunately for Discord, she already was colored grey on grey with grey eyes, so nopony noticed.
As the clock wound its way closer to five o'clock, the ministers and audience of petitioners were gathered in the throne room before Celestia, listening as a business owner finished her plea for an extension on taxes, "So, that is why I need an extension, as soon as I can come up with the last few bits, I'll send them right over."
Princess Celestia gave a rather solemn nod of her head, "I understand my little pony, however I must confess to you that this matter should have been brought up before my sister Luna, for she is the one that writes the laws concerning taxes," the pony before her began to shake slightly in anger about how it had taken her three weeks to get an audience with Princess Celestia, only to be pushed away to her sister. Celestia saw this and raised a hoof, "However, since you have come all the way from Vanhoover, I will see to it that you may present your case in my sister's court tonight."
Instantly he gave off a smile and bowed, "Thank you, Your Majesty," with that he gave a bow before trotting outside the throne room to wait for the Night Court.
"Now that we are finished with the petitioners, is there any last minute propositions from the ministers?" Instantly, Hard Time shot her hoof in the air, the only one among the group to do so, "Yes Miss Hard Time?"
Hard Time stood straight and held a piece of paper in her forehoof to read aloud, "Your Majesty, fellow members of the ministry. I have here, a request to release prisoner number A-A-Twenty-Three. Most commonly known as Perseverance."
A loud murmur shot through the room as chaos broke out among the ponies, much to Discord's delight, "Order, ORDER! This is outrageous," Celestia called out over the room, "The early release of a known criminal, convicted by my own authority. Minister Hard Time, what makes you think that he should be released now?"
The room fell deathly silent as all eyes turned to the dull colored Minister of the Justice. Hard Time cleared her throat and pulled a hoof through her oily mane before speaking, "If Discord had proven anything to me, its that everypony deserves a second chance."
The rabble broke out once again as ponies began to argue the point over and over, until finally Celestia knocked her hoof against the throne, "Order, order please! This matter will now be discussed in private, Minister of Justice, and of Practical Chaos will please accompany me to my study. Court is adjourned!"
The sound of her hoof against the throne clacked out one final time, and the room began to clear out as Discord stood to meet Celestia with Hard Time. As the two came up to the Princess, she narrowed her eyes and looked at the two of them, "Discord, if you would be so kind as to make a quicker route to my study."
He nodded slightly and opened the door to the hallway behind the throne, only to reveal her study on the other side, "After you both, I insist," Celestia said with a frown.
The two ministers looked at each other in slight worry before walking into the small room followed by Celestia. She stepped with purpose as she walked behind the desk, picked up a pair of reading glasses and frowned, "Miss Hard Time, may I have that piece of paper?"
The grey mare gave a smile and nodded idiotically as she passed the paper to her. Celestia frowned at the proposal for a few moments before speaking, "Discord, turn her back."
Discord gave a casual tilt of his head as his eyes grew large and suddenly had long eyelashes to make what little inner innocence he still had shine through with flying colors, "Why, what do you mean Celestia? I have done nothing to this pony."
She gave a look at Discord as Hard Time gave a dazed grin while looking up at the chandelier in the room and muttered, "It's so pretty, I want to eat it. Hello, I'm gonna call you shiny!"
As Celestia's look hardened at Discord he finally rolled his eyes snapped his fingers, instantly undoing the personality flip he had given the Minister of the Justice, "Have it your way, personally I found it to be an improvement if you ask me."
The dark grey mare seemed not to change in appearance at all, but her attitude quickly changed as she shook her head, "Why in the name of Tartarus am I here," she then looked at a watch strapped around her fetlock and gasped, "I'm late for the weekly prison check!" She started to spin in circles as she began to panic slightly, "How am I supposed to know if the guards are doing their jobs? What if they are over torturing the prisoners! I must run before the train leaves without me!"
The earth pony began to gallop away, only for Celestia to slam the door shut in her face, causing her to run headlong into it, "Please, give me one moment of your time before I personally make sure you are on time for your inspection of Grey View. Tell me, what do you know about prisoner number A-A-Twenty-Three?"
Hard Time blinked slightly before giving a small shrug, "I only know that you personally imprisoned him upon the request of the Equestria Daily newspaper staff, and that you gave him a fairly short sentence given all that he had done," she paused to contemplate things for a while before continuing, "He was an author that never made it, and made his home in the southern district here in Canterlot, and he worked at the Canterlot Airship Yards on the east end. According to the books, only one pony ever visits him, a mister Steam Shine."
Celestia nodded slightly at this information before continuing asking, "Can you elaborate what the technicalities say about releasing him early?"
She looked at Celestia with confusion, as if the concept were foreign to her before answering, "Well, since you are the accuser and were technically the injured party in the case, you can't act as a neutral judge. You will need to find somepony of equal standing to do that for you. However, if you wish it, you can act as a prosecutor."
Celestia nodded as she listened carefully, "Thank you for clarifying that, I'm afraid you will miss your train to Applewood, but we will need a witness for what is about to happen."
With a flash and a pop, Luna appeared in the center of the group, still in her nightgown and holding her favorite plush, "No more clowns Tia," she mumbled to herself before snoring out loud.
"Luna, wake up, we need you," Celestia called out as she tapped her a few times.
The younger sister's only response was to yawn and mumble to herself in her sleep, "Yes I am a natural blue."
Celestia and Hard Time looked at each other for a few moments before Hard Time shrugged slightly. Discord then rolled his eyes and slithered past the two, "Honestly, you ought to get to know your own sister better," he leaned in close to Luna's ear and whispered something softly. So quiet that Celestia and Hard Time both made the mistake of leaning in to listen.
"THOSE VILE CORPORATE SCUMBAGS! How dare they try to restrict who I can share with!" She suddenly shouted as she turned to face the two ponies behind her, one of which was twitching on the ground while both had hooves jammed over their ears.
As Discord gave off a very smug grin, Luna blinked a few times as she tried to assess the situation. Finally, after a few moments of awkward staring Luna asked, "What am I doing here?"
Celestia, Discord, and Hard Time all tried very hard not to slap their face with a hoof, or paw in Discords case at the question. After a few moments, Celestia put her best smile on and answered, "We need a neutral judge concerning the release of a prisoner."
Suddenly Luna was all smiles, and wide awake as she summoned a box, "Huzzah! Finally a chance to wear the traditional royal judge outfit! Tell me Tia, is it something serious? An attempted robbery? Murder? Is it a military court? Oh do I need to get my tricorne?"
This time Discord could not resist slapping his face with a paw, and even Hard Time felt the need to shake her head at Luna before Celestia interviewed, "Actually, its just us. We need you to review whether we let a prisoner out early or not."
Luna's ears drooped down slightly, accompanied by a frown and wet eyes. Discord took a step back in fear of an oncoming temper tantrum of some sort. Finally, Luna looked at Celestia with her most childish look she could muster and asked, "Can I still wear the wig and tricorne?"
Celestia rolled her eyes slightly before responding, "Well, I suppose if you really want to;"
Luna interrupted her sister with a squeal as she clopped her hooves together and placed the fancy headgear on top of her cranium with a smile so wide her eyes were closed. Celestia sat down on some cushions as Hard Time stood to the side to whitness the proceedings, and Discord began to think of good excuses why he was going through with this, "Remember what I told you Luna, and this will all go very smooth, understand?"
Luna eagerly nodded as a round table appeared between the four of them. Luna sat down at the far side of the round table, as Celestia and Discord sat beside each other opposite Luna. Hard Time watched from afar as Luna cleared her throat to begin, "LET IT BE KNOWN THAT THIS SESSION OF THE ROYAL COURT IS PRESIDED BY THE PRINCESS OF THE MOON."
As Celestia's mane was blown back, Discord's ears decided to rebel and run away as he was sent flying into the wall behind him. Meanwhile, poor Hard Time had fallen over like a fainting goat from being unfortunatly close to the source of the Royal Canterlot Voice. Celestia shook her head to get her mane back into order before frowning at Luna, "What did I just tell you about remembering what I told you?"
Luna smiled brightly before answering, "I did remember, you told me about one thousand and eighty years ago, that when presiding over court to always speak with authority, and the proper linguistics befitting royalty."
This time it was Celestia's turn to smack her own face with a hoof as Hard Time shakily stood up mumbling about jets being quieter, "No Luna, No. I meant about how its JUST US. You don't have to yell at Discord and I, nor should you be yelling at anypony anymore."
She looked slightly crestfallen as Luna looked down at the table, "Oh, right then. Will Lord Discord present his case before the court?"
Discord stood and was suddenly once again in a suit, this time blue with a red tie, and a small pin on the lapel. He adjusted the tie and ran his claw through the new swept back spiky hair before clearing his throat, "Your honor, I stand before you representing prisoner A-A-Twenty-Three, a unicorn trapped in stone for the past eight months. I propose that such a sentence is inequine, enough to drive a sane pony mad," he paused as he snapped his fingers to show several floating images of the pony in question doing various things. Some of which were the ones that landed him in trouble, "This imaginative pony is simply being punished for his unique thinking. Something that can be rewarded in my ministry if he had the opportunity then that he could have now. I propose that he can be a great asset to my ministry, and can work off the rest of his sentence for me."
Luna nodded solemnly as Discord sat down. She then turned to her sister and gestured toward her, "And what does the prosecution have to say about this?"
Celestia now stood with her hooves on the table to present her case, "I represent Equestria Daily, owned by the Royal Canterlot Publishing Corporation. As you may be well aware, Equestria Daily was founded by none other than you Luna, and Myself well over a millennium ago to let our subjects know about current events."
Celestia paused for a few moments before continuing, "The pony in question had attempted to break into Equestria Daily no less than seven times, despite requests to leave by several employees and even high management. However, when I received a letter requesting my audience with him, that was the final straw. He threatened to continue harassing the business that I own half of until he got his way, and took that as a personal threat against royalty. As a result I felt it necessary to teach him a lesson." Celestia paused to look at Discord before she continued, "Allowing this pony free early might be all it takes for him to revert to form, and go back to his old habits. Now I am not asking for an extension on his sentence. Just that he fulfills his debt to society."
Luna nodded before writing down several notes on a pad before turning to Discord, "Any closing statements you have?"
Discord stood as Celestia sat back down, "Your honor, life is like a bowl of nacho cheese. It's not all smooth, in fact sometimes its lumpy with peppers and other spices. My esteemed opponent on this case, the Princess Celestia, is punishing a pony for being no more than a chunky pepper in her queso. A pleasant surprise at best, and a nuisance at the worst. Let it not be forgotten, that he had hurt nopony, other than himself. There is no law against being stupid, nor is there one against determination. In my eyes, this pony had not broken any real laws, other than being a prat, and there is no law against that."
Luna nodded as she took down a few notes, and Celestia picked up the proverbial ball, "Luna, you know me. I would never punish a subject unless I thought that he or she was a danger to either my subject, or themselves. Prisoner A-A-Twenty-Three is particularly thick, and I feel that it would take time to get it through to his head, and I feel that it has not been a long enough time for it to sink in."
Luna nodded slightly as she stood and held her notes up with her magic, "I believe that I have come to a decision. In the case of prisoner A-A-Twenty-Three, I agree with Discord, there is no law against being stupid. I also find that the reasons why he was imprisoned in the first place was for petty revenge on the part of my sister, who forgot to tell me that I partly own a publication. Therefore, I grant him to be released early," as she said this Discord began to throw a fist into the air when Luna continued, "On strict probation, under the personal care of Lord Discord, since he wants him out so badly. Court is adjourned."
With that, Luna slammed her hoof down on the table to finalize it. Celestia walked away to teleport Hard Time to Applewood and Discord was left standing with a look of confusion on his face as Luna walked past him, "Come on, lets go get your latest employee out."
Discord followed in mild confusion as to what to actually do with a pony under his custody.
That court case
This story is good, and I like it loads, it's an interesting and funny concept. I only have one problem with it...
...the grammar and spelling.
Luna is best judge. No exceptions! (This site seriously needs a Luna emote)
A good fic so far, but I fear for this stallion and the sheer volume of crazy that Discord is about to dump on him.
I guess you could say that Peserverance was
banned from Equestria (Daily)
YEAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Psdhaw, life happens mate, no need to apologize. Nice chapter, I can't wait to see this guy.
Nice chapter! But I have to say that your chapter wording is a bit different. Part 1, Part B or Part A, Part 2? You should fix that.
And life is life. If it gets the chance to do anything to you, it does it.
And your mom, 'Oma', gives me a wide window that you're a different ethnicity! Oma as in Mom and Apa as in Dad, am I right?
Great job and keep it up!
Does Luna even know what nacho cheese is?
Discord brought up the XboxOne, I'm guessing?
Luna helped found a newspaper while she was banished to the moon?
So many references!
My esteemed opponent on this case
I see what you did there, and I honestly found it hilarious :D
ugrgaming.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/phoenix_wright_news1.jpg
Hell yes
2712072
Oma is grandmother, I learned it in German class.
Haha
Neat. Although I wonder what Discord will do with that pony.
Also, I totally want to see judge Luna in the show
2712072 I think it's intentional. This is a story about Discord, after all.
D'aww! Luna was so cute wanting to play Judge! And sleeping Luna was even cuter!
2711635
Better question. What couldn't he do? This is Discord, after all.
You have no idea how hard that made me laugh.
And then I laughed some more.
"Oma"? Oh, so you're of Dutch heritage too?
2712124 she was only banished for a century. it says well over a century ago their fore she had yet to turn in to nightmare moon.
Good story
All I have to say is moorree please if you don't mind
2712755
Wha--?! There's an Ace Attorney reference in there??
Now I have to read this!
Is that a Finding Nemo reference?
2712909 No, she was banished for a thousand years, which would be a millennium. A century is one-hundred years.
Discord is best Phoenix Wright.
I think I know why...
Discord is best Q
We art a natural blue. We art glad thou knowest We doth not dye our colours. We feel there could be some fun for discord in thy next update. Excellent as always and We eagerly await thy next chapter.
Red and Black, the colors of anarchy.
And yeah, you need to fix the spelling towards the end there. Also, does this story take place a century after the series, or did Luna and Discord "found" EqD in absentia?
2711613
Sorry... I need an editor!
2712124
Maybe...
Also, It's supposed to be a millennium but I derped and when I checked that one slipped past me. Oops
2712181
Fixing!
2712755
Good! That is the point, to make others laugh!
2712818
Yes, My Oma came to America in 1955, prior to that, she lived in the Netherlands, (Rotterdam to be exact) but before that she was a POW under the Japanese in WWII after they invaded the Dutch East Indies. They liberated Indonesia and took the Dutch living there as prisoner, including my Oma at only 4 years old. TL;DR version, she is kinda crazy after all that.
2713000
eeeyup.
2713242
I'm glad to know I did not have to call to confirm! Let me know if I say something wrong.
2713409
You got it! (also first episode of Star Trek TNG)
BUT as I said its supposed to say over a millennium ago. They founded it together before Luna went all... Nightmare Moon-y
2713705 My Oma and Opa came to Canada in 1960~1961; I know my mother was born in 1961 just a bit after they immigrated, but she was born in January so I don't know exactly when. They don't have any unpleasant stories like that, just a young married couple realizing there wasn't much room in their native country and trying to make it on their own in Canada. They live halfway across the country from me, so I don't see them very often, but Oma and Mom talk regularly on the phone, and if I'm around I talk to her too, and they're the set of grandparents that we actually like each other. (Long story about my other set of grandparents.)
When Oma was over last year, I actually managed to show her an episode of MLP. "Dragonshy", I think. She seemed to enjoy it, and hopefully she'll try and share it with my younger cousins if they get an opportunity.
I love you for that reference
2714395 How about "They couldn't shoot an elephant at this distance!"
2715184
what about my favorite set of last words, "My good man, now is not the time to make enemies." Voltaire.
2712457
God...
I was obtuse.
*yay*
Great so far!
Brilliant! Hmm...I wonder how this is guna go?
2721173
It's gunna go south by south west until it reaches Los Pegasus.
Is it bad that I took this part literally?
HOLD IT!
*slams hands on keyboaobgophapuorna;kjghabopdjbg
I find a severe lack of objections in this chapter!
2724447
OBJECTION!
oh wait, your right...
2721186
Indeed...
If there's a third part of this little 'normal day' arc, I bet the next one will be in Roman Numerals...
2726381
Or will it???!!
2728546
Even if you don't, you're still technically running out of ways to mark them in a series.
Ah, Discord and Luna always able to cause a laugh out of me, loved it, though never though this would get serious, NEXT!
2722051
Discord = Rayman. Headcannon accepted.
Oh, this chapter was just brilliant.
I still find it a bit tyrannical of Celestia to turn ponies into stone.
Hell, I think prison time or such might be better, but you know, that's just me.
4539396 I don't know, I'd say stone for a year is better than prison for a year, with stone you don't have to eat or even know what is going on, plus you don't age.
My only problem is the discord didn't make lulu break the table. I loved it.
4872072
That's assuming you're not aware of your surroundings while petrified. In canon, Discord made a comment that implies he was conscious during his first imprisonment. Furthermore, in the text of this very story Celestia herself implies the pony is aware, as things cannot "sink in" to your mind if you are not conscious.
If you are aware of your surroundings, then petrification is much worse than jail time, as you cannot interact with the world around you at all, which is likely to cause existential crisis. Additionally, normal biological indicators of time such as the need to eat, the need to sleep, or the need to expel waste are postponed, causing time to begin to meld together; days blurring as you stare at the same ponies walking past the same environment time and time again.
5619941
"It's quite lonely being encased in stone, but you wouldn't know that would you? Because I don't turn ponies into stone."
Apparently celestia does!
Just curious, but shouldn't that be "intervened"