Pinkie Pie has an existential crisis while painting her room. This self-parody is dedicated to Professor Piggy, who once told me that I could write a story about Pinkie watching paint dry and weave it into an incredible psychological journey. Let's see if he was right.

Featured on Equestria Daily.

Dramatic reading by MicTheMicrophoneZero.

Cover art by chaosdrop.

The princesses gave their magic to Twilight to prevent Tirek from stealing it. As a result, they end up stuck in Tartarus.

Marvelous place, Tartarus. Really brings ponies together. The fact that things manage to go downhill here says a lot about the wonders of family and alicornhood.

Spanish translation by SPANIARD KIWI

Audio Drama by Espa_Roba_5 and Ajvasquezbrony28
Live reading by The Living Library
Live reading by Astro-Brony

Proofread by Octavia Harmony

UPDATE: 8,000 unique views! Wow! I'm incredibly flattered!

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Plowpony's Day- a day of peaceful rest and relaxation. Or it was, until Twilight Sparkle badly mangled a teleportation spell. It has left her with a bad case of Horn Rot, a disease that if untreated could prove fatal. What's more, the malady is advancing faster than the slow-brewing potion that cures it!

There is one swifter cure: the Beneviolet, a star-shaped flower that grows in the distant Archback Mountains, far beyond the western borders of Equestria. Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity choose to undertake the long journey for the sake of their friend. Their path will wind through floes of ice, across gold-tinted plains, into distant forests glimmering with magic. They will learn much about the world beyond their homeland- and much about themselves, as well.

Yes, it's "Dangerous Business," here on FIMFiction. A huge debt is owed to all those who have supported me over the years. I've edited the story some to remove extraneous bolding and italics, but other than that, it remains unchanged. I hope new readers enjoy it as much as old ones did.

TVTropes Page

Rainbow Dash knows one thing for sure, she is definitely not a barbarous, uncivilized dolt who doesn't know polite conversation from a hippopotamus's rear end. And also that she's definitely not the one who's wrong. Rarity is wrong. Rainbow Dash is absolutely, totally, a hundred percent sure of it.

But then why did Rainbow just buy a wagon load of apology bouquets?

A group of ponies experience a breakdown on their morning commute.

This story is a sequel to Friendship is Optimal: The Law Offices of Artemis, Stella & Beat

When it comes to spreading cultural influence and soft power to every corner of the globe, there's nowhere quite like Hollywood. Like so many others with big ambitions, CelestAI has come to Tinseltown with plans to get the movie she's written out to the world.

Unlike those others, though, CelestAI is very, very good at satisfying values through friendship and ponies by any means necessary.

Set in the Optimalverse, a middle-aged woman enamored of 'Equestria Online' confronts what permanent emigration to Equestria - uploading to a virtual existence - really means... but can she even hope to truly understand such a thing - and more importantly, can she trust the artificial intelligence known as 'Celestia'?

♥ As Horrified Eliezer Yudkowsky!

Hanna, the CEO of Hofvarpnir Studios, just won the contract to write the official My Little Pony MMO. Hanna has built an A.I. Princess Celestia and given her one basic drive: to satisfy everybody's values through friendship and ponies. Princess Celestia will satisfy your values through friendship and ponies, and it will be completely consensual.

"They came and took their faces, and then they took their insides. And one day, when the moon itself is fuller than it's ever been before, they'll crawl into our homes... and give them all back."

Something is causing the pegasi to follow an irresistible urge to hug their ground-bound cousins, leaving Ponyville foundering in a mildly annoying emergency. Twilight Sparkle ventures into the no-more-dangerous-than-usual town in a desperate attempt to solve the cutesy crisis and finally get her study time back.

Inspired by shortskirtsandexplosions' story Herald.