They say that good armour is a Royal Guard's best friend.

Sometimes, it might be a little more literal than expected.

After all, it isn’t every day that one receives shameless self-promotion from their protective attire.

You are anon, you lived in canterlot with the princesses as safety reasons and was fine with it until one day you stumbled upon Celestia's private Library and found books that makes you question the princess of the sun.

Anon heads down to a pet store in search of a new a pet. He was left in shock to find a live Unicorn mare alone in a kennel. Where she comes from is unkown—but how she got here in his gloomy world remains a mystery.

In his pursuit to recreate a pleasure from home in Equestria, Anon lets ponies experience some of his memories. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

They came suddenly and without warning. They wanted us to boop them. We must resist.

The art is by neuro if anyone was wondering.

Rarity, Twilight, and their friends are eating lunch, when AJ notices Twilight staring at a stallion. In the ensuing conversation, Twilight soon learns that her friends are all crazy ponies and have somehow gotten it into their heads that she is in a relationship with her mentor and idol Princess Celestia.

Because when her Pinkie Sense is going off and she just knows somepony's been denied the birthright which is their birthday celebration, she'll go anywhere and do anything to make it right. Even if anywhere means heading deep into a changeling hive, and anything is... well, anything!

But she'll do whatever it takes.

Birthdays are important.

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

After a tragic paper cut accident leaves Twilight Sparkle dead and buried, the townsfolk of Ponyville are soon horrified to learn that even death can't put a stop to Twilight's nefarious appetite for knowledge.

Best way to learn, you ask? By eating your brains and gaining your knowledge, of course.

Due to a mix-up in the pantry, the jasmine tea that Princess Celestia orders for consumption with her breakfast turns out to be made out of coca leaf, instead.

A period of overwhelming bureaucratic efficiency, aggressive platonic affection, and mild insanity follows.

EDIT: Featured (briefly) 6/13/17! Thank you all!
EDIT: Featured at #1 6/14/17! WOW! Awesome, thank you all!

This story is a sequel to The Foalsitter

It all began on a shopping trip with her cousin, Sunset Shimmer. Cadence saw through the illusionary magic of a young Chrysalis; who was only hunting for love-based emotions from memories. This simple moment set in motion a chain of events, that neither foresaw but both would never forget.