During an attack on Ponyville in the middle of the Summer Sun Festival, Princess Twilight Sparkle evacuates the town by teleporting the entire population to safety in Manehattan. It turns out that her idea of safety needs some work. As well as her aim. And spelling.

Meanwhile, on a hot summer day outside of Manhattan, Kansas, Jonagold Bruener had a fairly successful life with few complications. Until while out mowing hay, he had a very strange visitor fall from the sky. And then another. And another. And another....

Editors: Tek, TheMaskedFerret, Peter, BluePaladin42, Edward Becerra

Picture credit: Manhattan Water Tower

The yacht's wrecked. Spring Break is ruined. The cruise patrons are stranded on a deserted jungle island. And the crew of the yacht just...left them...somehow.

Sure, there'll probably be a boat, or rescue planes, or something, but why wait for all that when there's a perfectly good portal in the middle of the dark, spooky jungle that leads to a shortcut home?

Well, that and a long hike through another dark spooky forest. And a complete change of species.

The story of how the Canterlot High gang got home after the yacht sank.

Equestria is rather notorious for its historical illiteracy. A thousand years guarantees anypony who wasn't there to witness the event won't remember it. Even the passage of a few generations runs the risk of events falling by the wayside.

But some things ponies remember, even if they don't always retain the reasons why they hold onto those memories. Twilight Sparkle just found one, and now she's going to try to find the reasoning behind it.

It's worse than she could ever imagine. On so many levels, it is so much worse.

Inspired by "Corn & Peg," a Nick Jr. cartoon that G4 very well could have been in a much darker timeline. Set in very early Season 8, during the School of Friendship's construction, and assumes that "Spring Breakdown" took place during that time. Blame/thank Estee for this story's existence. No heretics were BLAMMED in the making of this story.

"'Colts will be Colts' is not a sentiment that applies here at my Friendship School!

Times have changed. Kids or not, everyone, students of friendship included, have to answer for these sorts of disrespectful displays. Now, all of you, down to Counselor Glimmer's office, immediately! I'm going to have a long chat with her about what to do with you all!"

EDIT: Featured #2 same day, 3/21/19! Thanks!
EDIT: #1 same day! YEET- thanks all!
EDIT: Now with an AUDIO READING by Skijarama!

It's the middle of the night. Maybe. Since Sunset Shimmer uses light-blocking curtains and has no bedside clock, it could be noon for all she cares. Still, the buzzing of her transdimensional diary wakes her up. It's Twilight Sparkle, panicking about venturing outside her comfort zone. Sunset does her best to calm her friend down.

Sunset's in trouble and we need Princess Twilight's help.  We've been calling her with Sunset's magic journal since yesterday but there's been no reply.

Looks like we're going to have to go through the portal and find her ourselves.

After all, it's a magical land of cute, colorful ponies.  This should be easy.

Right?

Sex tag exists for jokes relating to nudity and innuendo.

Chapters 1 - 5 pre-read by Spirit Shift and Rocinante
Chapters 6-41 (and most epilogues) pre-read by FanOfMostEverything

Complete list of cameos:

Act 1: Twilight "SciTwi" Sparkle and Spike the dog.

Act 2: Cranky Doodle Donkey, Cheerilee, Thunderlane, Applebloom, Big Mac, Grand Pear, Sweetie Bell, Angel, Bon Bon, Lyra, Octavia, Vinyl, Trixie, Flower Trio (Rose, Daisy, Lily Valley), Discord, Treehugger, Wallflower (Sort of), Scootaloo, Gummy, Mr. & Mrs. Cake, Mr. Davinport, Bulk Biceps, Amathyst Star, Cloudchaser, and Dinky Doo.

Act 3: Fancy Pants, Iron Will?, Moondancer, Zephyr Breeze, Sassy Saddles, Shining Armor, Tank, Doughnut Joe, Muila Mild, Snips & Snails, and Maud.

Finale: FSpoiler, ASpoiler, and SSpoiler.

Epilogues: Big spoilers here: Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Princess Cadance, Starlight Glimmer, Sunburst, Philomena, And a spoilery name drop.

Applejack's tour of duty didn't work out like she expected; maybe if she'd been able to keep her dang mouth shut... oh, well. She hadn't decided if she really wanted to make a career out of the military, but her superiors made it pretty doggone clear they didn't care for the idea, so that was that. But everytime Harmony closes a door, it opens a window. And maybe she's been sent exactly where she's always needed to be.

However cat-infested it was at the moment.

Twilight realizes she's lost track of a book. But it's not just any book... it's that book: the first one she recalls being read to her...

A collaborative work, by the main characters in the story itself. You'll see what I mean...

Presented with the opportunity to design and paint the ad campaign for an upcoming clothing line, Rarity realizes it's been a long time since she's drawn anything aside from clothing designs. She needs some practice to knock the rust off and a live model to draw from. Rainbow Dash is the perfect pony for the job.

Now if only Rarity didn't find Rainbow's posing so provocative ...

Editing by Formerly Committed and JetstreamGW.

When Princesses Celestia and Luna visit a public art gallery, they come upon a painting of Celestia, banished to the moon. They react to this in the only reasonable way: artistic criticism and analysis.

*****

Cover art by that paragon of good sportsmanship and all-around talented person, Rocket Lawn Chair.

Originally written for the Reversal of Fortune writeoff, with the cover art as the prompt. Thank you to everyone there for the pre-reading and advice, and to Pascoite for his (always invaluable) additional help and editing suggestions!

Now available in Spanish, courtesy of SPANIARD KIWI.
Now available in Russian, courtesy of oranzinispegasas.