BH+TJME=4Evar · 1:51am Sep 2nd, 2015
Sorry this is a day late! I finished it last night, but I needed to get some sleep and give some folks a chance to look at it.
So, one of my subscribers, yamgoth, wanted me to write about his favorite pony ship! Actually, it’s not really a pony ship. More of a horse ship.
My fan art. Commissions: $25 (two characters + heart.)
If you don’t know these two, these are the userpics of Bad Horse and TheJediMasterEd. They are not actually a couple, and as far as I know neither of them are attracted to men (or stallions.) This has never stopped a shipper.
And it is a very good ship. Bad Horse is a surprisingly laid back evil genius, and JediMasterEd is a rather laid back good genius. Knowing my feelings on opposites attract, you’d think I wouldn’t be into it, but more than morality both of these guys are smart, first and foremost, across an insane range of subjects. When they get to conversing, it’s easy to just sit back and watch all the smartness and wit slosh around the comment section.
From the time yamgoth brought it up to me, I had to agree that it’s probably the coolest ship I’m aware of on FiMfiction. It’s easy to image Bad Horse putting together evil plans , only to have JediMasterEd casually thwart them and suggest a picnic and conversation about artificial intelligence instead (which would inevitably inspire Bad Horse’s next plan.) (True fact: I tried to write this fic, but I couldn’t get the voices right. And you folks know how I feel about OOC shipping.) Then there’s the sequel where they adopt the plucky orphan GhostOfHeraclitus, who’s been living in a box behind the popular stories list and digging in footnotes for food…
Anyway, I get this ship, even though it’s between online personas that represent two actual people who have no romantic interest in each other, are not ponies or horses, and are in some ways quite different from how they present themselves online.
Shipping real people isn’t an unheard of thing. Know as Real Person Fic, (or RPF) there are several online fandoms for shipping guys in bands, hockey players (and other sports, probably, but I always hear about the hockey fics), politicians, and actors. These can be anything from romance fics to porn to parody.
Now, these are shippers the way we think of normal shippers. Most AppleDash or RariJack fans know darn well that their ship is not canon and is never going to be canon, and the ship is an exercise in extrapolation. Given what we know of these characters, as they’re presented to us, what would their relationship be like? Most people who ship actors or hockey players are the same way.
There are a few crazy fans out there who believe their real person ships are secretly real. These people are considered so crazy they aren’t shippers anymore, they’re known as Tin Hats. Some big Tin Hat ships have included Elijah Woods/Dominic Monaghan from the cast of Lord of the Rings, and Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki from the TV show Supernatural. Tin Hats go to stalkerish lengths to prove their pairings are really secretly in a relationship that they can’t reveal to the rest of the world because of homophobia in Hollywood. These people are nutbar and you should gawk at them from a distance.
But how does one end up as a not-crazy shipper of real people? I actually find that interesting, and I believe it begins with shipping goggles.
As I’ve mentioned before in other places, “shipping goggles” are what people are said to have when they’re over-sensitive to the signals that characters in fiction give off when they’re in love, or to set up for a romantic plotline.
If you look at a movie like When Harry Met Sally, or even the Flash and Twilight subplot in Equestria Girls, through different ways the characters act we’re supposed to see that they’re in love before they’ve admitted it to themselves. But someone with shipping goggles notices those same signs -- maybe not as clearly, but arguably there -- between Tony Stark and Steve Rogers, or Applejack and Rainbow Dash.
When someone catches a detail that seems romantic to them, even if it’s innocuous to everyone else, a shipper will start trying to fill in the rest of the story: why these two would be in a romantic relationship, what kind of relationship it would be, what other kinds of things they would say or do to indicate their love for each other. They also tend to start looking for more evidence to work in, which can lead to confirmation bias.
But even there, those are still characters in a fictional setting, where rules of fiction still apply. Actors are real people. Bad Horse and TheJediMasterEd are probably real people. (That or they’ve perfected some kind of tangible holographic projection to represent themselves in the physical world. With those two, I wouldn’t put it past them.) In theory, just because they show the same signs that we attribute to signs of romantic feelings in a story doesn’t mean we should think of them as characters in a story.
But… how are they really different from characters in a story?
Shipping goggles (as opposed to actually picking up on romantic cues between friends) can pop up in the real world when we have limited information about people. At that point, from our point of view, they are essentially characters in a story.
As I noted, this often happens with celebrities (who essentially present a public persona that is a fictional character,) but an internet community can be a fine place for it as well. We see controlled glimpses of people’s lives through text or voice or video clips. We mostly know information that’s relevant to our interactions with them. And when we’re dealing with text, we read our own inflections and tone into it based on all the same cues we would use in a story, trying to make it match up with the rest of what we know of this person and this interaction.
Behind the computer screen, they’re real people, with families and weird habits and moments when they stand in the grocery store and try to decide what kind of crackers to buy. But what we see on the screen is the character we’re reading. So if someone with shipping goggles looks at those two characters and picks up cues, it’s really no more weird than a fictional ship.
I also think this bleeds into other online interactions. It’s very easy for us to cast people online as a hero or villain, a cool kid or a hopeless nerd (especially silly since in real life almost all of us are hopeless nerds,) a wise mentor, or some form of artificial intelligence that lacks human emotions. As long as we realize that most of us are just (usually nerdy) people who spend far too much time online, and that the “story” is fiction, this shouldn’t cause too much trouble. Just try to avoid going all Tin Hat and thinking your idea of people is how they actually are as real people.
So, as I stated at the beginning, I think this is a very cool ship [1]. It does need a name, though. BadEd would be obvious, but I kind of like SithMaster. If anyone has any other ideas, drop them in the comments!
Also, here are some ideas for BadEd (or SithMaster) stories:
Bad Horse tries to find a way to tell TheJediMasterEd that he likes him.
TheJediMasterEd writes Bad Horse a love letter… but gets delivered to the wrong person!
TheJediMasterEd and Bad Horse are caught in Bad Horse’s evil lair during a rainstorm.
At a slumber party, a game of Truth or Dare leads to a surprising revelation for Bad Horse and TheJediMasterEd.
TheJediMasterEd has always wanted to go on a fancy date… will Bad Horse get the hint?
Bad Horse is sick, but TheJediMasterEd is at his side to take care of him.
Bad Horse and TheJediMasterEd enter a ballroom dancing competition.
.
Bad Horse gets thrown out by his girlfriend Rarity, TheJediMasterEd gets thrown out by his girlfriend Twilight, they move in together...
… and each end up with each other’s exes! (BadEd and RariLight… Suggested by a not-at-all suspicious palomino horse disguised as a shipper.) (Titanium Dragon, you’ve been reading RariLight, this one has your name on it!)
...and there are so many more!
[1] I also support ghostadopt [2]. But I hate it when some random guy who’s cosplaying as a villain turns up on FiMfiction, except he still writes like a normal high school student, but his userpic is just changed to look like the villain so everyone thinks he’s totally an evil badass.
[2] Of course the footnote is about GhostOfHeraclitus. Why else would I use a footnote?
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Oh gods.
I'm afraid there aren't nearly enough out of context canon images of the pair used to imply romance in this post, so I'll just have to mark your ship as invalid. And you call yourself a true shipper.
Nope! Not sorry for referencing that practice! Deal with it!~
I don't even
wait
so which one's uke and which one's seme
this is important XD
There's a very interesting essay on RP fanfic and shipping in Anne Jamison's book Fic. I have to admit that it still feels odd to me, but the comments on the essay on One Direction fic makes it clear that most shippers don't think of these "real people" as their real selves. They're shipping personas (personae?), not people.
That said, Scoots2 has been shipped a few different times, and all I can say about that is:
1. Some of these ships are more plausible than others, and,
2. Opposites do not automatically attract. They really, really don't.
i950.photobucket.com/albums/ad347/bill_alcala/serenity.gif
~Skeeter The Lurker
I considered the ship name "Bad Ed", and started guffawing.
Why not?
3363671
I'm... gonna let yamgoth field that one.
You know what we need? Art. Mauxie is almost totally based on art.
3363703
I made art! ...pfft!
Unfortunately, that is the extent of my artistic talent.
3363708 Then we need MORE art. We need at least one mad genius pumping out ship art, and preferably a small consortium.
This is beautiful.
Why do you people do these things to me?
Also, I really need to get around to reading Felt Heart. Maybe that will stop me from deciding I need to write yet another shipfic when I have so many half-finished.
Incidentally, in the realm of real person shipping, a friend of mine ships me and Bribri. It is kind of funny to be shipped, but also a little weird.
I wonder if Weird Al has found the Cheese Sandwich porn yet.
Wait, scratch that; I'm sure he has.
I wonder if it amuses him.
no
bookplayer, please
don't promote RPF :(
I'm having a really rough time at work right now, and was venting over Skype to friends and just being miserable in general. And then I saw this in my feed...
This was gorgeous, and exactly what I needed right now. Truly, thank you.
3363722 There is surprisingly little Cheese Sandwich porn. I track pretty much most of the CS stuff, sometimes without the filters. And you'd be amazed how little there is. The Weird Al connection is probably one reason why.
Dear Plum or ferret will you read my fic?
It took me months to write, could you maybe click?
It's based on that novel, Fifty Shades of Grey
And I need some love, and I want to be a ponyfic writer...
i.imgur.com/VLv5dgF.jpg
3363789
That's actually an odd thing I've noticed about ships in general; there are some ships which are vastly, vastly more adult-oriented than others. Some (Princest) make sense - they're inherently fetishistic. But like, SoarinDash is surprisingly low in pornographic content, and I'm not quite sure why.
I know this from my shipping tag analysis on Derpibooru, which I did back on January 15th... and never posted.
I should do it again and see how much (or little) things have changed.
A little while ago I decided that the only metric I will use to judge ships is how amusing I find the portmanteau.
BadEd gets a 5/10. Not the worst option, but not a winner on it's own merits.
SithMaster sounds like it's trying too hard.
Verdict: I do not actively ship it, but will if there's still room on the truck after I get all this MoonMoon[1] loaded up.
[1] Moondancer x Nightmare Moon. OTP
There's some comedic commentary here that I can't make because Bad Horse would have me tarred and feathered for blabbing about evil plans.
In fact, I've probably already said too much, hav--
Well, now my OTP feels REALLY WEIRD.
(BadGhost 4lyfe!)
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MoonMoon strikes again!
bookplayer stop trying to murder my sides thanks
3363722 This would be like the Power Ponies and the Mane-iac having to share a lair due to cutbacks in the superhero/supervillian business. I'm not sure what would happen, but there would be explosions. And it would be *awesome!*
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Challenge accepted.
I'm waiting for bad horse to chime in.
Personally (having roomed with them three times), I ship Brony Writer and Pen stroke (Writer's Pen)
Oh hey, Ed even has a pic of Bad Horse in the background.
...the ship is real.
It can be tough to remember we're all real people, with real-people personalities and complexities and problems. This is why, for me, meeting internet users in real life is always so surreal. There's a certain way you come to know people online, and another way in real life. When meeting friends and acquaintances in person, the two collide. Your brain skips gears, cross-references old impressions with new. It tries to form a coherent image of the person, reconciling very different approaches to evaluating others. You find yourself judging appearance and mannerisms when before there were none. It's a weird process that sheds an honest light on the ways we view people, both online and off. I catch myself judging how a person dresses, or I realize I mistook their online identity for their true self, while simultaneously realizing the internet has given me an inner access I would not have otherwise.
It's like becoming conscious of your breathing.
You missed the most obvious one! EdHorse.
The main thing that amuses is the idea of them ending up with each others exes works better as Jedi Master Ed Is supposedly dating a comely lass who has been affectionately nicknamed "The Rarity chick" Whether she is real remains to be seen....
...
...
...what?
3364734
This is it, Ghost. You've arrived. Well and truly, you are horse famous.
3364752
It's everything I've ever dreamed it would be.
3364734 You'd look so cute in a newsboy cap! Very Dickensian!
3364966
*rustles in wardrobe*
I have a rice-straw sunhat[1], I have a Prinz Heinrich cap, I have a knit cap[2], but I do not have a newsboy hat, and am not nor have I ever been knowingly Dickensian.
[1] Not a dǒulì, though.
[2] It's pretty cunning.
I'd like to point out--just for the record--that Bad Horse is way, way smarter than me. And also a much nicer guy.
This is not me being humble: I don't do the Uriah Heep* thing. And it's not me fishing for compliments since the only ones you catch that way are bottom-feeders. It's just a matter of fact.
* The Dickens character**, not the heavy metal band.
**
Uriah!
Uriah!
They call that Heep--Uriah!...
3364686
She assures me that she is, though if she turns out to be a succubus that'd be
twenty percenteven cooler.3366702
It's super fun!
*lands in bookplayer's blogpost in an explosion of moth dust*
Ah. Greetings, fellow sufferers! It appears that we have all gathered in this little nook to partake, gawk, and stare with half-lidded, lustful eyes at this here ship, a result of machinations greater than our collective minds can comprehend. Wonderful!
Now, this here blogpost is pretty ridiculous and raunchy, but it is my belief that I can make it more ridiculous and raunchy. Or at least stupid.
Shall we?
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3364149
Then consider the fact that BH got this bazzin' top hat from Ed last year's Bronycon and it isn't so far fetched that that hat in BH's avatar could be Ed's gift. Combined with the picture in Ed's, and that they're both monochrome horses, it looks like some sort of figurative horse yin yang symbol. It can't be mere coincidence. They are meant to be.
Heh... I don't behave like in real life as I do online, either. Contrasting with the craziness and disturbing posts, I'm far more reserved irl. It's just the way the internet is—it's a playground of freedom and anonymity.
Ed does break out into song a lot, though, just like the amount of lyrics he ends up posting. Like, you'll just be walking and talking, then someone will say something that jostles something in his head, and he will start singing. This is true.
Heh... when you're surrounded by everyday people so sheepish, mundane, plain, and one dimensional, you yearn for more from humanity. Then you see individuals who are colourful, interesting, imaginative, witty, and all so lively. Like the fictional characters you read in fictional stories. But they're not. They're real people. Now, staying conscious of this fact can keep you from blurring things too much as you cross the borders a few more times and flirt with insanity with the same mindset of a rabid yaoi fangirl who thinks that Kojima and Sakurai love each other very much.
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Obviously a coin toss will decide for us. Heads BH is seme, tails is Ed.
*places a quarter into the Dairy Queen donation thingy machine*
i.imgur.com/v9nXYUP.jpg
Uhh... dice roll? Evens Ed is seme, odds is BH.
i.imgur.com/zv13sRm.jpg
...Who says there has to be an uke and a seme? Screw convention. Maybe it's like balance, like a horse yin yang or whatever. I think we should consult Braeburned, drawer of teh gay, happy horses.
i.imgur.com/nf7Omft.jpg
Bookish, regarding your question, I think the answer is horse Tetris stacking wins over uke and seme categorizing. Sure(?) I'm just going with whatever the voices in my head are telling me ^_^
Oh wait. This still brings up the question of who is top horse block and which is bottom horse block. Well fuuuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaaauuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwk.
Imma let Bad Horse n Ed answer this
<.<
>.>
I like to think that Bad Horse is the uke in this ship :3
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They're both genius horses. Apparently, that is more than enough to supersede any opposing characteristics of the black and white morality they represent. Like, you have to watch these two together to really understand. It's not that they're so much opposites, it's that they very much alike. They like the same things and understand each other's references that it's scary. Like, we're talking about stuff from the 60's and 70's. Who was alive back then?!
3363690
I ship you with Gary :B
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How do I break this... while I was talking with bookplayer as she was writing this blogpost, it occurred to me that I should prolly ask who I should be shipped with. I mean, she's like a super shipping expert, expertly sailing the seven seas, past butt pirates and what have you, along with apparently being a secret super hero of some sort (shh!). Therefore, it's safe to assume that she knows things. I was really curious on who I should be forced to love very much.
She shipped me with you, Momma Twifight [1]. Apparently, we're both insane or something and this is how shipping works. Insane + insane = screaming temporal doom. Now, I know that you are my momma, but I am ok with this. And it does sound really kinky. Mreowrrr
Like, a shipping superhero god lady has said words and we should abide by them. I guess. For not doing an abide will proceed to a lack of things being shipped, possibly wrecking a hole into the drywall of the fanfiction universes. I am not one to letting such unkinky things do unpunished, so now I will do a squinkly mating dance I threw together by discerning the wrinkles on used gum wrappers (there was still sugar sticking in them yum!) and attempt to win the romantic affections of you, my own mother (apparently).
*flesh and metal bone shift into the upright form of a catboi. yamgoth takes off his shirt and throws it in 3364100 's face, turns to Twifight, and does a dance that alternates between snapping his arms left and right, and pelvic thrusts*
Do you feel a connection yet?!
PS I'm Canadian :3
3363708
I dunno. You could've done a Heartagram instead of a heart. It would've been more romantically metal that way. Plus, I'm pretty sure that not many people here know what a Heartagram is, so I'm pretty sure they would've mistaken it for a pentagram, and the confusion would have been most amusing.
Can I commission you to do a Heartagram version?
3363788
Need s'more cheering up? This made me laff instantly.
i.imgur.com/YwIhFvE.gifv
Persistence is how shipping can be made to work, and staring soulessly into the eyes of those who say otherwise :3
I like to think that's The Descendant on that windshield wiper and the driver is several people who favourited his fics.
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I ship you two together because reviewers. PP x Titty D [2] makes perfect sense. I mean, although one guy is nicer in his reviews, does food reviews, does EqD stuff, and is all around a super awesome nice guy, and the other is an evil, giant, metal dragon who prolly secretly feasts on all the brony tears, harvested from the carbonizing verdicts of his fic reviews, all done with a regal and civil flair rivalled only by Nicol Bolas.
One is a furry and the other a giant evil metal dragon who might have a soft heart underneath it all. It works :B
Also, PP, you do not want to see how many RPF I have done for my own amusement.
Sarah Palin x Bayonetta OTP.
3363789
If you saw a couple of pics with Pinkie and Cheese taking turns tickling each other while simultaneously doing other things (spoilers: it's not baking, per se), it was cuz I threw money at an artist man. I guess I should endeavour to cause more Sammich smut drawings to be made, eh?
Going back to Titty D, would you be amused if you found porn of your giant, metal dragon-ness? Like, if I found teh porn drawings of myself, I'd prolly be flattered, perhaps quite flustered, and then embarrassed that I never thought of the position being depicted on the pic (damn, that artist is creative).
3363917
Well, if we look at the blog title, BH x TJME, TJME looks like the word "time". It could be like Bad TJME. It sounds like "bed time". Who likes to tell bedtime stories? Bad Horse. Who's prolly assisted him at one time? Ed? It also looks like "bad time". I'm sure someone is bound to have a bad time from this ship.
Or Horse TJME. Horse time sounds like the Space Wolve's "Wolf Time", which is a prophetical end of times. Horse TJME could be the end of this world.
And then there's Jedi Horse. The imagery on that...
Of course, Ed Horse looks snazzy. It reminds people of Ed Wood, except with horses instead of woods
What say you now? I've made improvements :V
3363976
On the bright side, it's far less sinful than yamgoth x Twifight Sparkill?
3364039
I am trying to murder your sides, too. Except with evil nonsense humour
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So if BH is trying to make stuff go 'splodey like banks and embassies, and Ed is preventing said explosions through the power of horse love, there would be a distinct lack of explosions. That is until Bad Horse convinces Ed to embrace the dark side. Then we will find a distinct lack of restraint in the amount of explosions. I am sure this is how it works
3364429
Actually, this is what I've been calling this ship from the start
3364686
Dammit Ferret. Your cute happy perkiness means you can be shipped with most anything. Hell, even with the most awkward things, like a She-Ra Pez dispenser, or an old, lonely bookshelf bereft of books, or BH's cell phone which liked called you while you were on a panel at Broneycon on its own accord and totally had nothing to do with BH (it's the most true :B). I think his phone likes you.
*lightly tosses an empty toilet paper tube at ferret*
I bet you can't resist the urge to play with it >:3
And Ed has posted pics from Rarity Chick's deviantart awhile ago. Hhhhmeeeeeehhh... that's proof enough for me.
3364772
Oh hai Ghost <3
Ghost owes me a blo-og post~
blo-og post~
blo-og post~
Ghost owes me a blo-og post~
it'll be so frea-kin weird~
Heh heh... from the looks of it, you have to write about Ed Horse being the OTPest of OTPs! Yay! Or, at least of the life and times of Ghost, son of Ed and Bad Horse.
Naw, I kid, I kid. I did have another topic planned a long time ago. But now I don't know anymore if it'll achieve what I want to happen. I had a couple of goals set out, but one is quite difficult... a topic that will convince the Ghost to have more confidence in his writing so as to post more stories. But really, what topic would be perfect for this? Or maybe it's about instilling confidence in the writing process, implanting the idea. The topic doesn't matter too much...?
Nefarious plans are hard :/ No wonder Bad Horse just solves things with death lasers.
3365560
Heh... it's funny. I've observed Bad a lot. The reality is that he's got an evil gimmick, but underneath that exterior of bleakness and brony-tear harvesting, he's actually a very well meaning guy [4]. Like, he possibly wants to bring out the good in people. Good, packaged in the most ironic way.
Now, with this in mind, is it possible it's the opposite for you, Ed? I mean, you two already look like good foils to each other, along with being really good friends. I have seen little bits here and there to imply you may have a bit of evil packaged underneath that good (err—no offence!). I guess it could be described as zeal? I dunno. It would certainly make the whole horse yin yang symbolism thing work perfectly with balancing and all.
3363934
Psssssshhhhhh... don't be such a sissy. Bad Horse ain't that bad. Hell, he ain't no Candle Jack. Sure, you might get tarred and feathered, but at least you won't get abdu
[1] For those not in the know, one of my first interactions with BH involved him questioning if Twifight Sparkill and SS&E were my parents. The answer is likely "yes" because I'm some sort of shapeshifting moth/catboi/cat/Phyrexian abomination and them as my parents is a close enough explanation. I can only assume drunkeness, experimental drugs, and a healthy serving of caulk were involved that night. Also, BH has way too much insight on me.
[2] This ship shall be dubbed "Titty P". It also sounds like they're rappers. If they should choose to adopt this name, I'm expecting all their reviews to turn into rap reviews and they'd lay down their sick rhymes to tha filthy masses. Fo' shizzle, dawg [3].
[3] Damn these footnote things. I'm finding the best way to go about them is to type them up as you go, rather than typing them up when you finish everything. Like, you're liable to forget about making them if you wait for later, eh?
[4] I guess I can relate a bit? Maybe.
3382059 Late reply and a text wall.
Yup. I'mma have to kill you.
3382059
Bah! Getting upset over such things would just encourage them!
Admittedly I might be a bit creeped out, depending on the circumstances. Nothing like having a stalker to get the blood pumping!
Salt is an important part of a dragon's diet, don't you know.
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Yup. I do owe you a blogpost, it would seem. PM me the subject when you have decided and I'll get cracking.
3382059
Until the headache voice decrees, I cannot comment further.
However, despite, I admit I'd probably ship this.
LORD HAVE MERCY.
3382059
Oh, Bad Horse got his hat from Ed? And here I thought he bought it.
You know, it's intersting, I think the only reason real people can seem boring to us is because we just haven't gotten to know them well enough, or learned to read them properly.
3364429 3363917 Well, I like Bad Ed and Jedi Horse. But if you do the math, it turns out Bad Horse x anyone = Bad Horse.
this is a straight line for a mathematician