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Pinwheel is a simple earth pony. She lives in a little cottage outside Sweet Apple Acres, she makes pinwheels for a living, and she has plenty of friends. But one day, when she goes flying with her good pegasus pal Dizzy, she takes a fall and lands in the dark crossroads between life and death! If that's not bad enough, the Grim Reaper is forcing her to bargain for her life! And what will she do when that bargain takes a somewhat more...personal turn?
Finally, what took you so long, jk. This has always been one of my favorite fics. I can't wait to see what happens next. i mean it's not like you can kill Death. I have a feeling Pale Hoof is gonna become mortal, based on the fan art, but hell I've been wrong before.
Peace Out.
In many cultures there has always been more than one Grim Reaper especially if you look up western mythology, there are even some tales of a multiple reaper myth in Celtic folklore. If he's not death anymore I can see a new persona of death chosen as a replacement. Plus it would be funny/awkward to see Pale Hoof deal with things that don't die at his touche.
>>196211 My first comment was meant to be in a joking tone, don't sweat it. I like the way you separate his void and mortal plane voices with it.
So I was thinking about it, and it's similar to dating Rogue, except you'd have a little more leeway with her. Oh, and the cliffhanger...you bastard.
Dunn. Dunn...DUNNNNN
I can't wait for the next chapter, believe it or not you fic was he first Friendship is Magic fan fic that I actually ever read, I really hope that ending is amazing.
Also Twilight doesn't believe is ghost yet Death has been living in her town and he has also resurrected several things. Plus her own gods are tangible on a daily basis. Just saiyan.
Peace Out.
Hey, thanks! Glad you're enjoying the fic.
As for Twilight, she also said "I don't believe in curses" and "I don't believe in Pinkie Pie's Pinkie Sense", so saying "I don't believe in ghosts" is still in character, I think!
Also, points for posting Jelly Pony. Best pony ever!
I was just referring to the fact that all this supernatural stuff is happening and yet Twilight is unbelieving. It's be like you not believing in molten rock men from the center of the Earth and one just happens to be your room mate.
I just call him the jelly pervert.
Well that was both a combination of awesome and depressing. I don't know if i should shed manly tears or beg for the next chapter. I oddly like the pairing of Pinwheel and Pale Hoof, and let's face it she is more awesome than the love child of Kenshiro and Sonny Chiba because she can talk down and yell at death. I like that he's all like *ROAR* FUCK YOU CELESTIA, but his love interest shows up and he's all meep and offering her godhood and all "yes dear". I hope it works out for those crazy kids. i like a happy ending.
You feel really bad for Death at the end of this chapter. I love the back story of him once being a wide-eyed young colt to becoming a true god and his detachment from his old life and animosity towards Celestia. Speaking of Celestia she starts yelling at Pale Hoof and forgets that her immortality can be taken away by him. I will say this I really miss the humor and lightheartedness of some of the earlier chapters.
peace out.
This is like a better version of the movie Meet Joe Black. I love how Pale Hoof had a hard time controlling the volume of his voice. This is my favorite personification of Death. He's unsure of himself, stubborn, emotionally distant and yet when he meets a certain female it twist turns his life upside down. I find this story extremely heartwarming, grim, sad, funny and endearing. I mean we laughed, we felt d'awww, we threw up, and we were thrilled whilst reading this fic.
Months ago this was literally the very first fan fic I had ever read and now I'm a little bummed out that it is almost over; I know it sounds weird to grow attached to a story.
Peace Out and I can't wait for your next fic.
If it's any consolation, I'd like to put on my best Cockney accent and say "Thanks for the ride gov'na, it's been one hell of a journey."
When it's over, I shall post this gif and give you the full review, that covers most of this fic.
Peace Out.
While nothing about them suggested unkindness, there was no way to predict how they'd react to an unusually tall pony with a skull for a face. There was no way to predict how anyone would react, really.
That says it all, really. 
This is a great story, I'm really enjoying it so far!
I have to admit, when I read the synopsis I was not terribly interested, and eventually I concede to reading the first chapter. I figured I was going to go to bed in about 15 minutes, so it couldn't do any harm. 
Two hours later, I finish part one. I'm horribly amused, thank you for the story!
Best and most stirring chapter out of the lot.
Love Death and Pinwheel's characterizations. I'm feeling the mane 6 were a little 2 dimensional(except Rarity), no real harm though, they're well.. not who the story is about. Also, unless you were inspired by something this is a story of its own kind.
NEXT CHAPTER!
Five-O ain't got nothing on her!!!
They probably also have a good guess at who did the murder so directly going to Pinwheel
really interesting how he can show emotions now that hes in a mortal form, speech really has a effect on showing it.
Remembering how he probably spent hours not moving and staring at her while she sleepy made me d'awww ,its really adorable of him, adorable but creepy also. One touch and she would never wake up, he could probably keep her in the void and never send her on her way to the afterlife.
>>312766 Actually, He walked THROUGH the guy. Thats BOUND to cause all sorts of Catastrophic Malfuntions.
>>319679 Dear Appropriate respectful gender title (Generally Sir or Madame, But feel free to insert any Titles you feel Appropriate. Grand Poobah, For instance, or Blood Empress); How in the seven rings of Holy hell is this fic not more popular than it is? It has EVERYTHING. It's funny, It's witty, It's Macabre, It's VERY well written. It's characters are realistic, They feel like they could step out of my screen. You've created Several Original Characters I rather LIKE, one of whom is an (ex-)ALICORN. Gods, You're ticking most of the boxes required for a Lordly Ragequit and my Brains like "Ragequit? What the hell? I will BREAK your ARMS if you stop tracking this fic.)" How is this Fic not one of those "this is a great example of Pony Literature" Fics? The Fics everyone knows about? This, which is, as I believe I've stated, Pretty fucking great, Languishes in what appears to be obscurity while utter Drivel like Fallout Equestria gets Unsanely popular. *sigh* I guess people have no taste. In Summation, Kudos to you for writing a Kickass Fic, and thank you also.
Yours in Slavish Devotion and Rabid Fanboyism
-Lordlyhour
So Pale Hoof showed up again, did he? And he's mostly mortal now. This story just got 20% cooler.
The comments seem to indicate that the end of the fic is coming up. If so, it'll probably be right after the upcoming conversation between Pinwheel and the Reaper. But I can't see it ending there. The dynamic has just changed drastically. So there must needs be a sequel.
FAVORITE ALL THE SEQUELS!!
My my, what a lovely compliment! Your comment gave me the biggest smile.
As for why I'm not as popular, well, I'm grateful for every view, comment, and favorite I get. I've spotted Near Death on the most popular stories sidebar from time to time. Knowing there are some people out there who really like what I write is good enough for me. I've got over 100 followers, which I think is pretty impressive! Fics like Fallout: Equestria may be more popular, but I'm very happy with all the readers I have. Especially people like you, who give me great comments! 
Wow, Dizzy. What a bitch. Ugh. I hope she gets what's coming to her by the end of this. Pale not getting mortality and the importance of ponies is an understandable flaw for him, and it's one that HAS to be worked out for romance to work in the long term. I like that it's become the focus of everything instead of Pale Hoof's antics. Those were fun to read about, and I miss them, to some extent, but seriousing the fuck up to get to the heart of things is something I think is for the better of the story...
But at the same time, I wonder if it's too much. Pale Hoof always seemed somewhat endearing before. He did horrible things, but he didn't mean anything by them, and the story portrayed him and his actions in a more sympathetic and humorous light. Now he seems desperate, creepy, and almost unlikable. He does what he does out of malevolence rather than ignorance, and what he does is even more horrible than before, and it's done almost without remorse. It's UNDERSTANDABLE, I guess, but it's still off-putting. I want to believe that Pale Hoof isn't a bad guy, but it's hard when he acts the way he does. I can't root for him when he's gone to the dark side on the sliding scale of morality. It's a bit much.
I still love the story, and I know that he'll probably stop doing what he's doing and learn his lesson and blah, blah, blah soon, but it's still something that's messing with me.
>>336251 Though I do entirely understand your dislike for Dizzy, I can see where Dizzy is coming from. She is worried about her friend. My thoughts is that she looks at the relationship akin to an abusive one. Pinwheel's Boyfriend can kill people with a touch, has shown to be aggressive (though this is due to Pale Hoof's inability to understand social cues), and overly protective of Pinwheel (again due to inability to understand cues.) I think she is already paying the price. If Dizzy has been paying attention she should know that Pale Hoof isn't the nicest pony, who cannot grasps sentimentality and the value of life.
TL;DR: I love and Tolerate your opinion on Dizzy, but cut the girl some slack, her bestfriend is in a unhealthly relationship (In her point of view). 
Best wishes!
Oh before I forget, Can't wait for more from this awesome fic.
...
Shit
just
got
real.
... Or something! xD I just felt like I should write something, ya know, dramatic, after what happened, but I couldn't think of anything! So that's what'cha get!
... Still... Ouch... Even if she didn't mean to take the 'date' seriously, that hurt... Being told that you're unneeded, ect, is in the top 5 of things NOT to say to ANY mare...
>>194539 EXACTLY! xD (Except I am no teenager any longer... Almost 21, sadly. Meh, at least I'm a college student! I can blame my doing stupid stuff on that! XD)
... Is it sad that the second I read 'Substitute Reaper' I thought of Ichigo Kurosaki from BLEACH?
Also, just throwing this guess out there... Did they used to date or something, he and Celes, or were they just friends or something?
>>294059 XD Whatdayaknow, same with me! xD This is just too interesting and unique to drop! xD
(Also, thank you VERY much for having proper grammar! BIGGEST pet peeve of mine as a pre-reader and Editor for others, so it's nice to read something without seeing tons of errors! xD (There was like, maybe a couple in the ENTIRE part 1! And that was an accidental not capitalizing the first word in a quote in a new paragraph, so it's no biggie.)
ON TO THE NEXT CHAPTER! ~ALLONS-Y!~
~ Magical Trevor, Minstrel of Equestria
XD You have the best one-liners for finishing a chapter! xD You, good Madam, are EPIC! /]
(Thanks for actually putting a description in your profile that says you're a girl! XD I mean, I KINDA thought so, what with the MC being a mare, but you never know, you know? Anyways, thanks for saving me from making an idiot out of myself! (Or rather, a BIGGER idiot, since Magical Trevor makes an idiot of himself every single day! XD))
*Continues to read*
I really like Pale Hoof as a character and in many ways he is the true victim here. You have a immortal being that was once very much mortal eons ago, disconnected from everything, he meets a mere mortal that teaches him about life and what it's worth. To everyone else he is a murderer, but it's not the case, everything he does now is ruled by emotion. He's trying to live live as a mortal and he has made it possible for Pinwheel to touch him without dying. I hope things work out for those crazy kids. Seriously, Pin and Pale oddly make the most adorable oc couple.
Erm... Maybe I'm missing something, but I THINK I found a couple typos.
'... slaughter and subsequent rival that had happened just a few days ago...'
... Is the rival supposed to be revival? If not, please explain. 
Also, in 'The two spa ponies rushed to her air, claiming one...' Air -> Aid?
... He DIDN'T... *Blinks, then keeps reading avidly*
YES!!!!!! I caught up! 8D
... Wait a second...
I CAUGHT UP! There's no more to read! A-and I have to wait to... But... BUT!
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