• Published 6th Feb 2012
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Near Death Experience - Hadles



Can Pinwheel the Earth pony bargain with Death to get her life back?

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9
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Chapter 9

With its purple and yellow striped onion domes, gleaming white spires, and fluttering fuchsia banners, Canterlot looked more like a work of art than a serviceable city. Everything about it was impractical, from its confused layout to its delicate construction. If there was ever an earthquake, Pale Hoof was sure that the city would come crashing down in a second. The steamy waterfalls and the arching golden bridges would do nothing to protect it. Pale Hoof took a moment to contemplate the image as he and Celestia approached the city. The mountains would rumble and the city would topple over like a stack of china plates, smashing messily on the rocks below. He had to stifle a chuckle. Celestia peered at him sidelong, a deep frown tugging at her mouth.

"We'll have to leave Miss Pinwheel in storage. I hope you understand." She said, nodding to her two attendant guards. They carried Pinwheel's body between them. They looked at each other and lifted into the air. Pale Hoof held up a hoof to stop them.

"NO. SHE STAYS WITH ME." He ordered. The pegasus guards hovered uncertainly ten feet off the ground, looking between Pale Hoof and Celestia. Celestia's scowl deepened.

"Pale Hoof, I must remind you that you are not a guest here. You killed my citizens and, while you brought them back to life, your actions still count as murder." Celestia's stony façade broke and she let out a deep, mournful sigh, "My sister and I owe you much. Arresting you would be improper. Even so, we must negotiate the terms of your stay in Equestria. I cannot have you murdering my little ponies left and right."

"I WANT THE BODY. YOU WILL LEAVE IT WITH ME." Pale Hoof insisted. Exchanging glances, the pegasi dropped back down to the ground and placed the body at Pale Hoof's feet. Celestia did not move to stop them. Pale Hoof lifted the body with his neck and let it roll limply onto his back.

Celestia closed her eyes. "You always were unreasonable."

"I AM DEATH."

"True. You cannot help what you are." Celestia beckoned with a hoof, "I want to know why you're here. About Pinwheel. Accompany me to the palace." Her horn glowed as she magically lowered the drawbridge. Pale Hoof nodded, following the princess inside the city. The roads were deserted. Even the streetlights were out. Pale Hoof couldn't tell time very well – time did not pass in his realm as it did in Equestria – but he knew the difference between night and day. Ponies slept at night. Even Celestia's natural ambient light did not draw her subjects out. She led him through the dark, silent streets toward the majestic white palace in the heart of Canterlot. More armored pegasi greeted them at the palace gate, lowering their heads in respect for Celestia. Pale Hoof could feel them peering at him beneath the visors of their helmets.

The interior of the palace was as cold and silent as the streets outside. While lanterns illuminated the great halls, there were no ponies. All the servants were probably in bed. Even the pegasi guards were quiet, their eyes drooping sleepily as they followed the princess. Pale Hoof looked around the brightly colored entrance hall, inspecting the massive dovetailed staircase and the giant golden alicorn statue. Large windows looked out over the valley. Below the mountain, Pale Hoof could just make out the scattered lights of Ponyville. From the tallest towers of the palace, Celestia could probably see all of Equestria. "THIS IS YOUR NEW HOME?" Pale Hoof asked finally. Celestia peered over her shoulder at him, "IT IS NOT AS GRAND AS THE PALACE YOU HAD IN THE EVERFREE FOREST."

The corner of Celestia mouth twitched with a hint of a smile, "Yes, but I would live anywhere as long as I can watch over my ponies." Her small smile faded, "I could not stay in the old palace, though. Not after what happened with Luna. Too many painful memories."

"WHERE IS LUNA?"

"Out. She has many duties to attend to during the night." Celestia smiled, a faraway look in her eyes, "I'm so proud of her. She's readjusting beautifully in spite of what happened. It's still a little too early for her to meet the citizens, though."

"I SEE."

Celestia mounted the stairs, turning toward Pale Hoof. "But let's talk about you instead. It's been centuries since you last visited Equestria. All of a sudden, the mayor of Ponyville writes me and says you've dropped in and made a friend. That's the last thing I expected from you." Celestia frowned at the small blue body draped over Pale Hoof's back, "Though…I think you need a few lessons in how friendship works."

"SHE IS NOT MY FRIEND. SHE IS MY DATE." Pale Hoof answered, "I DO NOT WANT TO BE FRIENDS."

"Then you need a few lessons in how romance works. I won't be the one to give them, though. Even so, why would Death himself return to Equestria for a single pony?" Celestia asked, "As I recall…you never paid much attention to individual ponies."

"THIS ONE IS…SPECIAL." Pale Hoof replied, looking over his shoulder at Pinwheel. He nudged her head with his nose. She reeked of blood, "SHE WON A SECOND CHANCE FROM ME. TWO SECOND CHANCES. THAT MAKES HER DIFFERENT."

"Then doesn't she deserve to be alive?" Celestia asked gently, "Feelings of love aren't worth much if one pony can't reciprocate."

Pale Hoof looked down at Pinwheel's corpse, then back at Celestia, then down at the corpse. "IT'S BETTER THIS WAY."

"But why?"

"MY TOUCH KILLS EVERYTHING. PINWHEEL SAID THAT REAL COUPLES KISS. I CANNOT KISS HER IF SHE IS ALIVE. AND I DO NOT WANT TO BE JUST FRIENDS." Pale Hoof answered, "IF SHE IS DEAD ALREADY, THEN I DO NOT HAVE TO WATCH HER GROW OLD. MORTAL PONIES HAVE VERY SHORT LIVES. I WOULD LIKE IT BETTER IF PINWHEEL STAYED LIKE THIS FOREVER."

Celestia shook her head. "Mortal lives are beautiful because they are short, Pale Hoof. I would like it if all my students remained with me forever as well, but it can't be that way. So we must love the time we have with them instead of mourning their loss." She explained gently, "You don't even have to worry about that. When the ponies you love die, you're there to walk them into the Afterlife. There's no reason for this morbid display."

"PINWHEEL SAID COUPLES KISS. IF WE DO NOT KISS, WE ARE NOT A COUPLE." Pale Hoof reiterated. Celestia covered her face with her hoof.

"There are all types of couples, Pale Hoof…" Celestia began, but soon fell silent. She continued up the staircase, pastel mane rippling weightlessly behind her. Pale Hoof trailed after her, "Expressions of love are important, but…" She let out an exasperated sigh, "Haven't you considered how Pinwheel feels? Don't you think she's scared…or hurt…or confused that you did this?"

Pale Hoof glanced back at Pinwheel. "SHE'S DEAD. SHE DOESN'T FEEL ANYTHING."

"You know what I mean. Don't you have more fun with her when she's alive?" Celestia tried, a note of desperation in her normally serene voice, "If you're going to stay in Equestria, I can't have you dragging a corpse everywhere you go."

Pale Hoof paused for a moment. Sitting at the table with Pinwheel's corpse wasn't very fun. When she was alive, ponies didn't run and scream when they saw him. They could go buy fudge at Sugarcube Corner or get ice cream together and, while ponies would stare, they wouldn't run. Pinwheel laughed and smiled with him when she was alive. Pale Hoof found he liked the sound of her laugh. She talked to him and said funny things too. When she was dead, she was quiet and unmoving. Other ponies seemed to like him better when Pinwheel was alive by his side. But if she was alive, she'd get old and die again in the blink of an eye. What point was there to bringing her back to life if she would just die soon anyway? "IT'S FINE. EVERYPONY WILL GET USED TO IT."

Celestia sighed again, shaking her head.


The portal to Equestria opened just as the Ponyville Clock Tower struck midnight. Pinwheel appeared hundreds of feet above Sweet Apple Acres, floating precariously as blue clouds rolled by beneath her. "He-hey! We made it!" She grinned broadly, looking around. As soon as her eyes found the ground, though, Pinwheel began to plummet. Flailing and screaming, she descended rapidly toward the earth. Just before she hit, Thunderhead zoomed down and scooped her up under her forelegs.

"Whoah there, little filly." Thunderhead laughed, gently setting her down on the grass. Pinwheel gasped, dropping onto her knees and kissing the ground. Thunderhead kept chuckling. Pinwheel glanced up at the colt. She could see the stars and clouds moving behind him, as though he were a pane of purple tinted glass.

"You're see-through!" She exclaimed, hopping to her feet. Thunderhead looked down at himself curiously.

"So I am."

Philomel descended to meet them, light as a summer breeze. She floated gently five feet above the ground. She, too, was transparent. Pinwheel could see the stars shining through her pale body. "We're intangible in this world, Pinwheel." She explained softly, "So that makes us see-through."

"And we can float too?" Pinwheel exclaimed, gaping up at Philomel as she hovered, "Why didn't you guys tell me this BEFORE we went through the portal? I was having a panic attack!"

"You fell because you thought you would fall." Thunderhead explained, "That's kinda how it works for spirits. Like, if you think that you can walk through walls, you can just go and stroll right through 'em without a care in the world. But if you think you can't, well, you'll just knock your head."

Pinwheel looked down at her hooves, frowning. Closing her eyes, she pictured herself floating. When she opened her eyes, her hooves were a few inches in the air. Before Pinwheel even had a chance to smile, she dropped heavily back to the earth. She sighed disappointedly. "That isn't as easy as it sounds."

Philomel drifted over to her and patted her reassuringly on the head. "It takes a while to get used to." She said, "I couldn't get it right away either."

Pinwheel shook her head and puffed out her chest. "It doesn't matter! I'll be back in my body soon anyway." Trotting along the grass, Pinwheel looked around, "Okay, so we're near Sweet Apple Acres. My house is just down the road. This shouldn't take long at all."

Philomel frowned. "Are you sure? It's been a few hours since you died."

Thunderhead nodded. "Yeah. And the boss hasn't revived you yet. Maybe somepony took your body."

"Well, the house is a good place to start either way!" Pinwheel declared. Following the road, they soon came to her small cottage. The screen door stood open, flapping noisily in the night wind. A trail of blood covered the front steps, leading through the garden and down the road. Pinwheel's heart sank. She dashed inside, running for the back bedroom. A large pool of blood, smeared my hoof prints, covered the floor where her body used to be. Swallowing hard, she looked out the window and followed the drying blood trail with her eyes. It led right down the dirt path to Ponyville. Thunderhead and Philomel followed her into the bedroom, grimacing at the puddles of blood, "He took it!" Pinwheel growled, baring her teeth, "Death took my body!"

"But where'd he take it?" Thunderhead asked. Curiously, he sniffed the pool of blood and gagged. Small clouds of flies drifted over the puddles.

"That stupid colt! He took it to Ponyville. I know he did! Oh Celestia, I hope nopony saw him. Ooooh, he's in SUCH trouble!" Pinwheel raved, tearing past Philomel and Thunderhead. She stormed along the bloody trailed, galloping as fast as she could toward Ponyville. Thunderhead and Philomel floated along in her wake.

"Think about it, Pinwheel! It's been hours and that blood didn't look fresh. Your body could be anywhere!" Thunderhead called from behind her. Pinwheel didn't slow down.

"Then we'll look for clues in the town! I'm not leaving without my body!" Pinwheel snarled. How could he? His skull face was enough to put anypony on edge. The small hauntings he caused made it even harder for others to accept him. Pinwheel told him these things over and over again. He should know by now not to do anything creepy around the other ponies. Yet he still dragged her body out of the house and took it to Ponyville, of all places! Did that stupid colt listen at all? There'd be a riot if everypony say him hauling a corpse around.

As they reached the town, Pinwheel came to a halt in the square. The square was deserted. Even so, Pinwheel could catch the sound of ponies talking from a nearby side street. Sharply turning down the street, she found herself near Sugarcube Corner. Mrs. Cake stood sobbing on the front step, her hooves covered her face. Mr. Cake stroked her lank mane with a hoof, whispering soothing words while other ponies gathered around. Slowing down, Pinwheel approached the scene. Stopping a few feet away, she glanced over her shoulder at Thunderhead and Philomel. "Can they see us?" She whispered.

Thunderhead shook his head. "Only if you get really close. Just concentrate real hard on being invisible and it shouldn't be a problem."

"Got it." Tentatively, Pinwheel approached the crowd. I'm invisible. I'm invisible. She repeated over and over again in her head. Shuffling past the other ponies, she crept closer to Mrs. Cake. The older mare looked as though she'd seen a ghost. Her face was deathly pale despite the tears streaming down her cheeks. A hard lump of guilt settled in the pit of Pinwheel's stomach. Judging by the blood all over the cobblestones, Pale Hoof had been by here.

Mrs. Cake wiped her eyes futilely. She opened her mouth to speak, but her words were choked by tears. "Oh, Carrot! I…was…so scared! Why won't that awful skull pony leave us alone?" She gasped between sobs. Mr. Cake gently rubbed her back.

"There, there, dear. The Princess will teach him a lesson, I'm sure." Mr. Cake replied, nuzzling his wife. Mrs. Cake threw her forelegs around his neck, burying her face in his chest. Mr. Cake stroked her mane lovingly. He turned toward the other ponies gathered around, "Thanks for your concern, everyone. It's getting pretty late, so why don't you head home? Sugarcube Corner will be open as usual in the morning."

Pinwheel stood stock still as the other ponies departed. Mr. Cake helped his wife to her feet and led her inside, closing the door softly behind them. Turning, Pinwheel looked up at her floating spirit companions. The 'skull pony' could only be one colt. Even so, the mention of the Princess made Pinwheel's skin prickle with nervousness. Why was Celestia in Ponyville? What had Pale Hoof done that warranted a 'lesson'? Again, she glanced down toward the blood on the cobblestones. She suppressed a shudder. "Pale Hoof, you dummy…" She sighed.

"So…what? Do you have a lead?" Thunderhead asked after a few moments.

"Yeah. Princess Celestia took Death to Canterlot." Pinwheel answered, "I'll bet you anything that my body's there too. But we'd better hurry."

"Right!" With that, Thunderhead swooped down and plucked Pinwheel off the ground. Flying as fast as they could, the three zoomed off toward Canterlot.


"How long will you be staying in Equestria?"

"I DO NOT KNOW."

Pale Hoof and Celestia sat in the palace garden. The moon was bright and heavy overhead, free of the distinctive markings that signified Luna's imprisonment. Pinwheel's corpse lay at Pale Hoof's feet, surrounded by a halo of dead grass. The princess lowered her head, sighing deeply. Her shoulders rose and fell. "I've never claimed to understand you, Pale Hoof," She began, "But…I…for the safety of my ponies, I don't think I can let you stay. It's just too dangerous and…I don't feel you properly understand how mortal ponies work."

"THEY LIVE, REPRODUCE, AND DIE. WHAT IS THERE TO UNDERSTAND?"

"You've been with Pinwheel. Don't you see there's more to her than that?" Celestia tried. Pale Hoof simply stared at her, "If you don't see a difference between a live pony and a dead one, it's not safe to let you stay here. I'm sorry."

"I WANT TO STAY WITH PINWHEEL." Pale Hoof rose to his feet, "I WILL MIND THE LIVING PONIES AND I WILL NOT HURT THEM. IF PINWHEEL'S LIFE IS THE PRICE OF MY STAY, I WILL ACCEPT IT." Pale Hoof lowered his head, touching his nose to Pinwheel's mane. Celestia watched him curiously. Slowly, Pale Hoof opened his mouth and breathed softly on the corpse's hair. Nothing happened. Pale Hoof stepped back and waited. Pinwheel remained still.

"Nothing happened." Celestia concluded after a few moments, "Is something wrong?"

"SOMETHING IS INDEED WRONG." Pale Hoof replied. Dropping his head, he tried again. Still nothing, Pinwheel was as dead and motionless as the dried grass she sat on. "HER SOUL IS GONE. I CANNOT FIND IT."

"It's gone? But how could it be gone?"

"I DO NOT—"

A sudden stirring from the body interrupted them. Slowly, both Celestia and Pale Hoof turned toward the corpse. Weakly, the corpse began to rise. One hoof at a time, Pinwheel struggled to her feet. She slipped a few times, her fragile knees unable to support her, but finally managed to stand. Teeth grinding, she lifted her head. Red, raw wounds still dribbled on her chin and belly, leaking droplets of black blood onto the grass. When she opened her mouth to speak, part of her esophagus flopped out. It hit the grass with a wet 'fwap'. Her small blue chest heaved with painful, rasping breaths. Her eyes pulsed with angry red veins. She took a few staggering steps toward the god ponies.

Celestia rose to her feet, turning sharply toward Pale Hoof. "Is this your doing?"

Pale Hoof shook his head. "NO."

The thing that was once Pinwheel doubled over and vomited blood. She let out a tiny pained cry, tears streaming down her cheeks. Pale Hoof and Celestia quickly backed away. "Pale Hoof…" The reanimated body rasped, voice thick and gravelly, "You big dummy!"