Chapter One – Chance Meetings
The dawn broke fair and warm over Ponyville. The quiet of another peaceful night began to dissipate in the midst of a hundred or more brightly coloured birds each chirping her own beautiful melody. Their cheerful chorus was carried to every corner of town on a mild breeze which barely disturbed the flags on the roof of town hall.
As if beckoned from her slumber by the majesty of such a morning, Twilight Sparkle awoke. The many songs of the Ponyville birds were to her mind some of the most comforting and joyous sounds she could recall. They reminded her that she was home. As much as she had been born a Canterlot pony, she felt that it was there in Ponyville she belonged; surrounded by her friends.
In one fluid motion, Twilight leapt from under her sheets and began planning her day. There were books to be studied, magic to be perfected and a baby dragon to be looked after. She drew her sheets up the bed and flattened them carefully with her hooves leaving her bed looking as if it had never been slept in and began to potter around. She levitated some books she intended to read later in to a small pile on her desk and empted some of the luggage she had left lying after her late return from Canterlot the previous night. As she emptied one of her bags, she moved yet another dusty old tome on to her reading pile, carefully placing it on the top.
Barely an hour had passed before she decided she had best wake Spike. If she was to get anything done, she would need his help.
“Good morning, Spike,” she whispered, “time to wake up.”
Spike stirred gently and Twilight smiled fondly as she watched him stretch and rub the sleep from his big, round eyes.
“Morning, Twilight,” Spike yawned, sitting up in his bed.
“We have a big day ahead of us,” said Twilight, “and it wouldn’t do to oversleep. I need you to help me take some notes on the new book I was given by the Princess and I really ought to practise those teleportation spells some more.”
“Yes, ma’am!” responded Spike, no longer looking the slightest bit weary. The little dragon began running around the library opening drawers and cupboards fetching rolls of parchment and quills and ink while Twilight trotted over to her desk.
However she had no sooner opened her book to the first page than there was a small knock at her tree-house door. Twilight cantered out of her study and through the library to answer it. Upon doing so she was greeted by five very familiar faces. In her rush to resume her studies, Twilight had completely forgotten to schedule some time to see her friends. They had obviously not made the same mistake.
“Welcome home, Twilight,” they chorused as one.
Twilight beamed at them, “Hello everypony! Come in, I was just about to start with some reading but I can do that later. I can’t wait to hear about everything I’ve missed!”
The five mares flooded into the library, taking up seats on cushions and the floor and window sills with Rainbow Dash preferring simply to hover in mid air. Twilight took up her position between Rarity and Pinkie Pie, looking expectantly at each of her best friends.
The stories had really mounted up since she had left for Canterlot three days ago. It seemed Sweetie Belle, Applebloom and Scootaloo had been up to their usual high-jinx; they had decided that there were cutie marks to be had in covert information gathering (spying, Twilight thought with a giggle) and had been turning up in the strangest places dressed all in black. Pinkie had made some lollipop cupcakes and chipped a tooth trying to eat them. Applejack and Fluttershy had had to spend a whole day trying to convince a particularly stubborn beaver to move his dam away from Sweet Apple Acres’ south field. Rainbow had been woken up from a nap by a rogue thundercloud which was moving very quickly: she thought it might have escaped from Cloudsdale’s weather factory while one of the colts was on his break. She caught it of course. And Rarity had had, by her own admission, a very uneventful few days. She was glad to have had some time to catch up with her work.
“But darling, you must tell us all about your trip!” Rarity exclaimed, “Canterlot is so much more exciting the boring old Ponyville. Did you find the Princess well? And you’re family?”
So Twilight related the happenings of her trip. She had been to all her favourite haunts from when she was a filly. She had spent a huge amount of time in Canterlot Castle’s library broken up by visits to Doughnut Joe’s, her father’s observatory, her old family home, several cafes and, of course, an audience with Princess Celestia.
“She sends her best wishes for all of you and hopes she can see you all again soon. Between the six of us, she really doesn’t get to see real ponies that often. She gets the airs and graces treatment so often that I think she sometimes wishes she were an ordinary mare,” Twilight finished, looking a little forlorn. She shook her head.
“But Rarity, how could I forget? While I was visiting with my mother, we went to pick up a dress for her from Chic Mode’s Boutique in the fashion district...”
Rarity’s eyes became very large, “Oh, you’re mother must have very refined tastes, Twilight. Chic Mode makes some of the most beautiful – and expensive – dresses in Equestria. Why, I heard she has created designs for both Princess Celestia and Princess Luna!”
“Yes, well,” Twilight continued more excitedly than before after this little interjection, “While she was doing some final alterations on my mother’s dress, I was talking to Chic Mode about my fashion designer friend, Rarity, from back home. I told her how lovely your dresses are and what a creative and generous pony you are, but it seems she’s already heard of you! Your dresses for the Gala obviously drew more ponies’ attentions than just Hoity Toity’s.”
Twilight had kept a close eye on Rarity’s expression during her story. Perhaps she had been being cruel by drawing this out for so long. Rarity was leaning in so close to Twilight now that she could practically feel her eyelashes brushing her face as she blinked.
“Anyway, she said that if I could arrange it, she would very much like to meet you in the flesh and have a look at some of your designs!”
This was clearly too much for Rarity to take. She screamed like a schoolfilly and slipped on to her back, her forehoof resting on her brow as she tried to catch her breath. Suddenly she sprang up and began prancing around the room while her friends congratulated her. Twilight could almost see the wheels turning in her friend’s mind about what to show her and how she would present herself.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you, Twilight!” Rarity screamed.
“It was really nothing,” said Twilight, “We were talking fashion, so naturally I thought of you.”
“It is not ‘nothing’, Twilight,” Rarity insisted, “I don’t know how I can ever repay you. That’s twice now you’ve set up these kinds of opportunities for me. You are the best friend a mare could hope for.”
Twilight felt herself blush and looked at the floor before being scooped up in to a hug by all of her friends. She relaxed in to it. This was, after all, the magic of friendship: being able to do one small thing for somepony to make them feel so appreciated. To think that while she was in Canterlot, she had missed out on this for so long. This was why she felt like Ponyville was where she belonged.
* * * * *
For the week leading up to the meeting with Chic Mode, Twilight must have spent more time talking about colour palettes, the merits of hoof stitching versus machine stitching and the varied shapes of necklines, sleeves and pleats than she had in the rest of her life up to that point. Far from being frustrated by it, however, Twilight was simply happy to see her friend as excited.
The evening before they were due to leave, Twilight decided to visit Rarity at her home to make sure she was ready for an early departure the next day. The pair had booked a hotel for themselves and Spike not far from the fashion district of Canterlot. Rarity had suggested it. It was called the Blanket Stitch and, according to Rarity, a lot of Equestria’s most famous models stayed there when working in Canterlot.
“I’ll be back in an hour or so, Spike. Remember to pack my bit purse and a spare quill,” Twilight called back to the study. And with that she left stepping out in to the balmy evening air.
After a few minutes, she found herself crossing over the bridge that marked the halfway point of her journey. She paused for a moment to look at the sky which had turned a beautiful peachy red in the sunset. In her mind’s eye, Twilight could imagine Luna getting ready to raise the moon. It would be a full moon tomorrow: the night before Rarity’s meeting. How auspicious? If one believed in such things as luck, that was.
At last, she reached her destination, rapping lightly on her friend’s door. Rarity answered as quickly as if she had been waiting the entire day for this moment.
“Twilight, darling, come in! Come straight up to my work room,” Rarity cried, heading off in that direction and allowing Twilight to close the door behind her.
Twilight followed Rarity through the front of her boutique and up a set of stairs. Upon entering the room, she looked around and saw piles of fabric and hats with huge feathers sticking out of them. There were ponyquins with half finished dresses, each with several dozen pins sticking out of hems and darts. Scattered across the floor were a variety of sketchbooks, some open, some closed and some with pages hanging loose. She tried to imagine what it would look like if it were tidy, but failed.
“Please excuse the mess. I’ve simply had no time to clear up. I’ve spent the entire day pouring over my old designs and creating some new ones. I’ve got the best in a pile over there on my table. Would you take a look and tell me what you think? I’ll just go and put a kettle on for a cup of tea. Two lumps of sugar, yes?” Without waiting for a response, Rarity left Twilight to look through her sketches.
There was everything there, from complete ensembles to single items; from hats and scarves to jewellery and bags; from long ball gowns to delicate strapped shoes. Twilight didn’t know exactly what Rarity wanted to hear from her. If she had wanted criticism, Twilight knew not what to say. She was in awe. Every last drawing was perfect to her eyes. She flicked slowly through the pages eventually stopping at one in particular. She admired it for a while before removing it from the pile and surreptitiously placing it to one side.
After a short while, Twilight began to wonder what had happened to Rarity. She looked up to find her levitating two cups of tea on a tray behind her, looking inquisitively at her. Twilight wondered how long the other mare had stood there in silence.
“So? What do you think?” Rarity asked.
“They’re amazing,” Twilight answered in barely more than a whisper, “All of them. I don’t know from where you get your ideas.”
Rarity sat the tray down and looked over Twilight’s shoulder, taking a small sip of tea from one of her delicate cups. Twilight followed her lead. Somehow, Rarity’s tea always tasted so much better than anyone else’s.
“Oh, you are just too kind, Twilight,” she said, putting down her cup and magically picking up the sketch Twilight had set aside. It was a sketch of a classy little black sweater combined with a fuchsia beret and a set of cute little black shoes which started from the ankles and dipped in a curved V-shape as they approached the hooves.
“This is one of my favourites too,” she said musingly as she looked at it.
Twilight smiled at her: “I love the beret. I bet this would look great on you.”
Rarity blushed. Twilight loved how modest she could be at times.
“Thank you. I’ve only ever worn it once. For an art gallery opening. It’s only very occasionally that one gets the chance. I should very much like to have the chance again.” She returned the drawing to the pile.
The rest of the evening was spent discussing plans and finishing packing. The latter task seemed to take a very long time; so long, in fact, that by the time they had finished, it was time for Twilight to leave. Ever the polite hostess, Rarity showed Twilight to the door.
“Well, thanks for a lovely evening, Rarity. It was a pleasure, as always,” Twilight said.
“Not at all, darling, the pleasure was all mine, I’m sure. And once again, thank you ever so much for organising this meeting and agreeing to make the necessary introductions. For that matter, thank you for accompanying me to Canterlot,” Rarity responded.
“It was really no trouble. I’ll see you at the train station tomorrow morning. I had better get home quickly to check on Spike. Good night!” Twilight said.
“Good night, Twilight Sparkle,” Rarity replied, leaning in to envelope her friend in a hug.
Twilight left, walking towards Ponyville. That embrace had seemed to mean something more than just the usual friendly hug. Perhaps it had been Rarity trying once again to convey her gratitude to Twilight. Whatever it had meant, the lavender unicorn felt a special closeness to her friend that evening. Although maybe that was just the quiet optimism she felt for Rarity. With those designs on show, she was bound to impress Chic Mode and that could mean great things for her business. Before she knew it, Twilight had reached the Library. She quietly let herself in and went to her study. Spike was already asleep but had left a candle burning on her desk. Twilight looked out of her window at the smoke rising from a dozen little chimneys in the distance. How wonderful everything seemed that night.
She lifted the candle and walked to her bed, sitting it on a low table before climbing in. She leaned over with another little smile to herself and blew the candle out.
Very interesting. Continue onward my good author.
I like it. Got a bit lost in the fashion talk, but that's my own ignorance speaking up there. Keep it up
It's coming along well enough, but you definitely need to find an editor to help polish the story up and make it mechanically presentable.
I like where this is going! Want more. Provide thine good word!
Thanks for all your kind words and helpful remarks and thanks to all who have favourited or thumbed up so far. I shall attempt to finish writing the second chapter within a few days. I have a lot of ideas running around inside my head, but I want to make sure I'm not running the well dry too early.
Many thanks, again!
Ooh, haven't seen new RariTwi in quite some time
The setup works really and the characterization is spot on for the most part, I'd say. The pacing is really good, though not perfect, and I have to say I'm pleased that while romantic feelings are hinted at in the first chapter, nothing is blatant. Drawing it out gradually in this particular setup makes it more believable
You've got yourself a solid premise and setup here, and this is a pairing that not only makes sense to me, but it's one I enjoy as well. Looking forward to more!
Yeah, forget my PM. You're an excellent writer, so I decided to give your other stuff a shot, and chapter one says it all. You prefer writing stories in which Spike has no friends. On two occasions in the very first chapter, Spike is put to work while Twilight gets busy socializing with "her" friends. The second instance is understandable, but the first is just horrible, showing all of their friends excited to see only Twilight, interested in telling only Twilight about what they both missed, never appearing to care that two people just returned from Canterlot, and doing absolutely nothing to make the dragon feel welcome. There were all kinds of not-very-subtle indicators throughout the text that placed the ponies closer Twilight's heart than the guy she hatched and has worked like a slave for her ever since.
It was not hard to imagine Spike walking into the living room in attempt to feel like he was part of the conversation, only to have one of the mane six send him a "go away" gesture without even looking in his direction, after which he headed upstairs to curl up in his basket, listening to the happy chatter one floor down and contemplating suicide for the dozenth time.
Shipping the two most special ponies in his life is beautiful as long as they're both happy and they never stop loving Spike. But here, none of his friends love him at all. How can I care about their happiness when Spike's life is so depressing and void of affection?
3317856 The first instance was Twilight [and Spike's] friends showing up at the library to welcome only Twilight home. The second was just the scene in which Twilight viewed Rarity's dress designs, which obviously wouldn't have included him.
My critical view may come partially from my appreciation of his character and underdog role in the show, but it comes mainly from the fact that he's the only character who is consistently treated as less than equal, or less important to Twilight than her newer, same-species friends. I can only appreciate stories in which Twilight loves all six of her closest friends, not "all five". For clarity, I'll copy/paste the lines that were bothersome, and demonstrate the fixes that could have been made:
That whole sentence would need to be reconstructed to show what Spike was doing, and to clarify that Twilight was looking at her pony friends, not her best friends. Spike comes first in that regard, unless you mean to imply that freely providing her with more support, commitment, and loyalty than anyone else (to say nothing of endless work hours) his whole life has earned him less than the girls earned by merely discovering their status as saviors less than a day after meeting her.
That one borders on flat-out racism. Twilight literally just implied that Spike doesn't matter.
I'm sorry you feel that including Twilight's other half more would have only bogged down the narrative, but in canon, he is her closest companion, close enough to anticipate her needs and stick by her side at all times. You write as if he is nothing more than an employee. Sure, mentioning him unnecessarily would distract from the focus, but you need to strike a balance between staying on track and sticking to canon (in which she specifically calls him her "number one assistant and friend"). Failing to mention any random character like Fluttershy or Applejack is not the same as failing to mention a constant, committed presence in her life. Perhaps his involvement in future chapters is sufficient, but after that ponies-only library greeting, I was not interested in reading the next one.
P.S. You need to reply to me from the chapter page, otherwise I don't get a notification.