Pinkie Pie The Poketrainer Fails At Breeding!

by WorldWalker128

Silly Story

Dear pokedex diary:

Today I finally caught my very own Ditto, can you believe it?! It wasn't easy, I have to say! Just finding it was really hard, as it had disguised itself as Professor Sparkle so it could hide from the trainers and other Pokemon in the area, but as I learned from Professors Sparkle's brother, you can always pick them out from the real thing by looking at their legs.

Allow me to explain; when a Ditto is transformed into a trainer or another Pokemon for whatever reason there are invisible holes on the bottom of its legs or wings that light will shine through, which shows only on their shadow. Most trainers don't think to look at a Pokemon's feet or hoofs or tentacles, so they almost never realize what's really in front of their own eyes! Wild, huh?

So anyway, I was out and about with Gummy looking for something new and interesting to add to my collection when I saw Professor Sparkle down an alleyway using some strange green magic on one of the local stallions. At first I thought that she was trying out some new capture-technique that she'd later use to catch that big Ursa she'd shooed out of town to protect the townsfolk, but then she bit him on the neck like one of those big bats (I forget what they're called right now) that kept pestering me back when I went looking through a cave in Gym Leader Zecora's forest. A pink light flowed from the stallion which I found really strange and just then my back teeth wiggled and me left ear flopped!

I'd never felt that one before, so I sneaked a little closer to get a better look at what was going on. Suddenly Professor Sparkle transformed and then it was right there! I grinned at my luck and sent Gummy to get it, telling him to use his BITE attack. Gummy looked at me for a few seconds, then walked up to the Ditto and latched onto it's leg. It must have been paralyzed, because it didn't so much as twitch!

Sensing that I'd not get a better opportunity than this, I tossed an empty Pokeball out and beaned it right in the side of the face! Within a few seconds, I'd captured it, and added the Ditto to my collection!

Oooh! I just had a great idea, Diary! A Ditto can become any Pokemon, and the rare winged Ponyta I caught last week I've not seen anywhere else! I'm gonna put the two together, tell the Ditto to imitate the flying Ponyta (except, you know, have it be a male) and make them make another one! Or five!

* * *

Later that day in Pinkie's hastily constructed breeding pen

Rainbow Dash frowned at Pinkie Pie as she approached the pen Rainbow had been stuffed in twenty minutes earlier.

Last week Rainbow had been minding her own business, napping on a cloud when she'd been smacked in the head by Pinkie's mute and toothless alligator. When Rainbow finally managed to pull him from her mane she was more than a little annoyed about being woken up (and having an alligator jump or thrown at her head) and looked down to see a grinning Pinkie Pie. This in and of itself was nothing unusual, and seeing her without a smile of some sort normally made her far more nervous.

“Pinkie? What the hay are you-” was all she'd managed to say before a white and red ball was tossed at her. Rainbow Dash ducked and the ball sailed overhead. “What the hay, Pinkie?!” she repeated.

“I'm gonna catch you, flying Ponyta!”

“Pony ta? What's a- ack!” She ducked again as another ball hurled at her.

“Stop dodging, you!” Pinkie scolded.

After a merry chase that took the two (or technically three, if you count Gummy) all over town, briefly into Everfree forest, on top of Twilight's tree, and then finally into the park where, finally too tired to fly any farther, Rainbow Dash reached out a weak leg and called for somepony, anypony, to help her. But to no avail, and now, here she was, trapped in an two and a half meter by two and a half (and a quarter) meter pen made of plywood, scrap metal, and an out-of-place heart-shaped bed with a pink frilly blanket and two soft goose-feather pillows on it.

“Pinkie Pie, I'm not sure what's running through your head right now, and to be blunt, I don't much care. Just let me out, and I won't report you to the town's police force the next time I see them.”

“Aww, feeling lonely, Ponyta? Don't worry, I brought you some company!” Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow as Pinkie Pie pulled another of those strange balls from a magnetic belt Pinkie was wearing and opened a small flap that Pinkie had tossed Rainbow's own ball through. She tossed it inside and after a brief flash of light Rainbow Dash jumped and shuffled quickly backward until she hit the wall.

“Pinkie! That's a Changeling! What are you thinking?!”

The Changeling looked about in confusion at it's sudden change of surroundings, and then when Pinkie giggled it spun and hissed at her. Pinkie didn't seem to notice.

“You two play nice now!” Pinkie sighed adoringly and smiled. “I can't wait to see what cute babies you have!” She clapped her front hoofs together a few times, and then turned to leave.

Rainbow Dash and the Changeling picked up their dropped jaws and exchanged a glance, and then stared at Pinkie, disgust and disbelief on their faces.

“Babies?!” They both exclaimed simultaneously.

* * *

Dear pokedex diary:

For some reason the Ditto and the flying Ponyta are refusing to mate. They just sit on opposite sides of their pen and glare at each other. Is it possible that the Ditto I captured is also female? That might explain why they're acting the way they are...Perhaps I should ask Professor Sparkle about the how to identify the genders of Ditto better. I mean, they all look the same to me, but perhaps an expert on Pokemon like her could tell me!

(Fifty minutes and six seconds later)

Well, Diary, I was right! There is a way! The females are a slightly lighter shade of color than the males, and have a slightly more rubbery outer shell to them than the males! Unfortunately I've never seen both a male and female Ditto together that I can recall, so I guess I'll just have to improvise a little...

Back at the breeding pen

“Okay, Ditto!” Pinkie began, unbarring the surprisingly sturdy Trainer door open. Both Ditto and the as-of-yet unnamed flying Ponyta looked at her and rose up. The flying Ponyta tensed up a bit, and looked like it might bolt, so after Pinkie Pie stepped inside the pen she slid it shut, turned a key she'd brought in the lock that until now she'd chosen not to use, and swallowed the key. Or rather, she pretended to. In reality she'd only hidden it below her tongue. “I need to find out whether you're male or female! So, if you're male, transform into-” she pulled a picture out of her mane, showing a hoof-drawn picture of a Minotaur flexing his muscles, which had been dubbed 'Machoke'. “-this!” She set the picture down on the dirt floor, and reached into her mane again, this time withdrawing another hoof-drawn picture, this time of Scootaloo, which was labeled 'Doduo'. “If you're female, turn into this!”

The Ditto blinked a few times, looked back and forth between the images, and then shape-shifted into Doduo. Pinkie Pie sighed and made a snapping sound identical to a sound that creatures with fingers could make even though she herself lacked the necessary appendages. “Drat! I guess I'll have to find another of you, then.”

When the the Ditto sagged a bit on the dirt, Pinkie Pie realized that she just might have hurt its feelings. After all, her own feelings were sometimes hurt when she was told she wasn't wanted. Pinkie crouched down next to it and gave it a hug, patting it where she guessed its back was. “Aw, I didn't hurt your feelings, did I? I wasn't trying to, you know! It's just that Ponyta don't normally have wings and I was hoping to see if it was possible to make another one or if it's just like when a Pokemon is a Shiny.” She gave it a pat on the head and smiled at it. It looked back at her, but said nothing. “Don't worry; once you're free you'll be able to go back to your friends!”

Pinkie Pie picked Ditto up and, unlocking the door and making sure the Ponyta, which made use of its enhanced agility from its wings to dart towards the door did not escape, set the Ditto down on the ground. She patted it one more time. “You're free, Ditto. Goodbye!”

Pinkie barred the door shut from the outside once more and walked away, tossing Ditto's old ball up and down in one hoof while she walked from the back of her home's small yard and indoors.

* * *

(Thirty minutes later)

Rainbow Dash paced in her pen, awaiting something besides a few birds flying overhead once in awhile. For the longest time nothing happened, but then finally she heard the on the back of Sugarcube Corner open and shut again and hoofsteps head for the door. Rainbow Dash stood up and stretched her wings, flapping them a few times in preparation to charge the door as soon as it opened.

This time I'll be ready and she won't!

“Guess what, Flapper!” Pinkie said, sounding a little more excited than usual.

Oh great. Shes gave me a nickname. Rainbow Dash thought, rolling her eyes.

“I found you a new buddy! And this one is an actual one of your kind this time! Aren't you excited? I know I'm excited I've never been so excited before! Well, except for-” At this point Rainbow Dash tuned her out.

The small flap opened again and another weird ball was tossed in. While the unfortunate creature inside was still forming Pinkie Pie told Rainbow Dash (or Flapper) to “Have fun!” and then left again, but not without sliding a pet-bowl full of water through a slot too small to crawl through in the bottom of the door followed by several apples cut into the shape of cubes.

When the form finally finished materializing, Rainbow Dash groaned and once more sank to the ground, her head in her hoofs. It was indeed a Pegasus. A female Pegasus. A female Pegasus with a gray body, a blond mane and tail, and a bubbles cluster for a Cutie Mark.

“Hi, Rainbow Dash! Have you seen Pinkie? She was saying something about needing my help with Pokemon Breeding!” Derpy Hooves asked in her normal cheerful manner. Rainbow Dash sighed and began muttering under her breath.

“Pinkie Pie, I am never letting you borrow my copy of Pokemon ever again!”

Comments

[Musharna]

One of the best one-shots I've ever read! And being Pokemon-related doesn't hurt either.

[kingtiger666]

This is a nice break from the constant terrible fourth wall jokes and unfunny randomness that you usually see in Pinkiefics. I actually really like it when she has psychotic pokemon-related hallucinations! Let's have some more!

[Shrouded Guise]

Have all my likes, that will be all.

[Rainbow87dash]

Poor Dashie

[Changeling-Drone]

please do more that is all i want

[WorldWalker128]

2185208
Suggestions? She's done breeding...I've got a vague idea about a battle with another trainer (Surprise) or maybe with her trying to catch a Seapony at the beach one day to add a Water Type to her collection...Or maybe Sombra as a Ghost Type during a trip through what she thinks is the Safari Zone or Poke Tower...
Or maybe even make fun of the Brony in Equestria Living With Lyra stories and have her think he/she is a Mankey.

[Changeling-Drone]

all those would be great if you want i was going to write a giant story about pinkie pie pokemon trainer if you want i can send you what i have and you can make [is not good with stories] It if you can that would rock. also if you do that once you have the first chapter up pm the link

[Changeling-Drone]

although more breeding would be funny

[Rakaziel]

Great story! Maybe Pinkie's next plan is to capture Celestia because she is a Legendary (Acreus), or Luna (Giratia) or Sombra (Darkai).

[WorldWalker128]

2187977
I'm leaning towards (at this point) either Sombra and having her think the Crystal Empire is Lavender town (I've only played the first three games if you don't count the first Pokemon Stadium and Gale of Darkness and stopped watching the cartoon years ago, so don't expect too many of the more recent Pokemon to be mentioned) or having her capture a seapony. Haven't decided which yet, though.

[Changeling-Drone]

hmm how about twilight rages [fire fur thing] then pinkie catches the "rapidash"

[WorldWalker128]

2194260
Pinkie Pie already thinks that Twilight is the Pony equivalent of one of the professors from the game, and given that in the cartoon the characters can already do weird stuff like getting a giant head for a few seconds when they're angry and shouting, Twilight briefly bursting into flames would not really mean much to Pinkie. Twilight would have to remain on fire for a prolonged period of time for Pinkie to think that Twilight was a Rapidash.
Of course, given that Shining Armor is her brother and quite powerful in his own right he might share the same ability. If he were to have an argument with Cadence and walk away fuming he might just also burst into flames.

[Shion Sonozaki]

Hahahahahahaaaa! :ShionLaugh: One of the rare few things that make me laugh. Haha, as in funny haha, not evil! Pinkie the Pokemon Breeder, Dash the Pokemon fan. And the Pokemon. Perfectly Legit.

[Razzy]

Snrk, that was hilarious.

I bet the changeling really hoofed it out of there.

Cya
Raziel-chan

[WorldWalker128]

6824751
Wow, someone actually liked this months after it's been written. Glad you enjoyed it.

[poppys]

LOL.