Last Chance
Last Chance
Rainbow sat alone on her cloud. High above the ground and even further away from Ponyville and a certain lavender unicorn. For what felt like the hundredth time she sighed, her cheeks marked clearly with her tears. She had long since given up the fight to prevent or even dry them.
“I loved you.” Twilights words cut deep, bouncing around in her head, preventing her from getting anywhere near the sleep she so desperately wanted.
“I loved you too… and I still do.” Rainbow tried to comfort herself, though it was useless. At this point there was only one pony in Equestria that could achieve that, and she wanted nothing to do with her. When Rainbow had left, she thought Twilight had called her, asked her to wait. But she was just fooling herself, there was no way Twilight wanted her to stay for any reason. She had yelled at her enough to vent the anger, and all that was left was her sadness; sadness that Rainbow had caused.
So she left, she didn’t look back. She had hurt Twilight too badly to even apologize any more. She had nothing left to make it up to her. Nothing left for her to try and make things right. She had made a mistake so bad that she would never be forgiven. But maybe she shouldn’t be. Maybe this is what she deserved.
What kind of friend does what she did? What kind of marefriend lies for her own selfish reasons? One who is undeserving of Twilight; that was for sure. And yet she couldn’t shake the lingering thoughts she could still do something; like she hadn’t given everything in trying to make things right. She had given up her dreams and she had stopped flying for fun. The entire flight to the cloud was mind numbingly slow compared to what she normally did, and even then the entire flight was spent in tears and sadness. She had given every last thing that had even remotely been involved, and still, something told her she could give more.
You never deserved her. A voice called from within her head.
“I know that!” She shouted into the night sky, being rewarded with more silence from the stars.
She chose the wrong mare.
“I know! I gave everything to make it right!”
Everything?
“My dreams, my fun, my love. Everything worth any true value to me.”
What else do you have, that you still do?
“Twilight is not the type of pony to forgive over material goods.” Dash spat, the voice nothing more then an annoying disturbance, spouting ideas she herself had already gone through.
Surly there is more you posses. For example, you can still fly. They may be physical, but they represent your freedom.
As if the voice had a physical hoof to point, she snapped her head around, looking back at her wings.
“What are you saying?”
Do you honestly still think you deserve them?
Rainbow felt a shudder run up her spine at the implications. “No, giving up my flight is the same as my wings.” She shook her head firmly, attempting to quell the rebellious thoughts bubbling in her mind at the voice’s suggestion.
But what else can you give? You know you need to make this right, no matter the cost. Isn’t she at least worth that to you?
“Of course she is! She’s worth my whole life! I would give anything-” She was cut off by the smooth, chilling voice.
What about your life? You just said she’s worth your entire life, and you still have that to give. Rainbow gave a confused look towards the air around her cloud as if the voice was something physical she could look at.
“What do you mean? Like, servitude or something? I doubt Twi would go for that.”
No, she wouldn’t, but you could still give up your life for her, not to her. Do you still think you deserve it as well?
Something in Rainbow’s mind clicked onto what it was saying. Her life meant more to her then her wings and dreams combined. Surly Twilight would have to see how much she was sorry if she gave that up? Maybe Twilight would even forgive her!
“You think?” She asked hopefully.
Of course, Twilight is not so blind as to not see when something is done for her. She will see what you are doing and why, then she will understand.
“But how? If I were to just jump off the cloud she would never know, she would have to be there, to see it.” Rainbow’s thoughts and words were no longer her own. A near delusional state over came her, only thoughts of Twilight and giving her life for her could get through to her, everything else came out as a vague blur. She occasionally caught tail ends of half-voiced arguments from somewhere in her mind, but nothing clear. All she could comprehend was her, the voice, and Twilight. And the voice had given her the perfect way to win Twilight back.
Isn’t there a Wonderbolt show in a day or two? You never officially quit, all you need is for Twilight to be there. Then the whole crowd would see you, all of them could appreciate what you were doing and why. Twilight would be so proud of you!
The voice was making more and more sense to her already weakened mind. No longer did she have the walls of sorrow or anger or anything to protect her, instead there was the voice. Offering comfort and forgiveness, all she had to do was listen to it. Maybe it was on to something.
“How do I get her to show up? She hates me now; she would never come just because I wanted her to.”
Maybe, maybe not. You could try asking her, tell her it’s something special, one last effort to make things right. She might show up.
It made sense to Rainbow, the voice had yet to suggest something that wouldn’t be helpful, and Twilight may just take a chance to make things right. She may never love her again, but at least she would forgive her.
“I’ll get the tickets!” Dash launched into the sky, heading to the Wonderbolts main office in Cloudsdale. A nearly insane smile spread her lips, showing just a bit of her teeth as she flew through the air. One last chance, this was a one shot thing, it had to go perfectly.
-_-_-_-
Twilight sat in her library, on a cushion in front of her fireplace. A lone piece of wood burned inside it. She rarely used it; most of the time she heated her tree magically and even then it was rarely cold enough outside for her to need to. But this time she had forgone her magic for a fire. For some reason the inconsistent heat against her coat always calmed her down. The dancing oranges and yellows brought to her piece of mind no matter the situation. Right now she needed calm above all else.
Her friends had left some time ago, though with much protest. She had told them what had happened; she hid nothing from them, ‘unlike a certain cyan pegasus’ her mind noted dryly. She quickly shoved the thought out of her mind. Now was not the time to be sad or bitter, she reminded herself with a quick sip of cocoa.
Most all of her friends had all but demanded to stay and keep her company. All of them concerned about her mental health or something. She hadn’t listened, after all, the smarty pants incident was a one time thing. She assured them over and over, but they held on until the bitter end. Of all of them Fluttershy was the hardest to convince. Rainbow’s oldest friend, and arguably most trusted, had insisted over and over that she souldn’t be alone.
Twilight was surprised she didn’t run off after Rainbow, being the caring creature she was Twilight doubted she would be only concerned about her. Though something was off about her from the beginning; every time Twilight would say Rainbow’s name she would hide a little more behind her mane. She would not partake in any discussions about the pegasus, not even when specifically asked her opinion. While it was not unlike her to keep her true opinion to herself if she thought she may often somepony, it was rare she would offer no opinion at all.
Twilight shelved the thought for later, deciding she would make sure Fluttershy was alright in the morning. Now was her time to relax, let her troubles leave her, and let calmness-
THUD… THUD… CRASH
Two consecutive thuds, followed by the sound of a window breaking forced her out of her clamed state of mind. There was only one pony who ever crashed into her house. Sure enough, turning around from the fire revealed a cyan pegasus with a rainbow mane, lying upside down against a bookshelf, glass littered across the floor in a trail leading right up to her.
“Rainbow Dash, what they hay!?” Rainbow stood quickly, balancing herself with her wings, she shook her head lightly and mumbled something to herself. She stared at Twilight, suddenly unsure of herself. With another quick shake of her head her apprehension turned into what could only be described as a maniacal smile as she reached into her saddlebags with a wing.
“Rainbow! What are you doing?” Twilight shouted again, waving a hoof to catch Rainbow’s attention. It seemed to have no affect as Rainbow continued rummaging through her bags. Eventually she withdrew her wing, passing whatever she had withdrawn to her mouth. Holding a plain slip of paper in her mouth she ran over to Twilight and set it down on the floor in front of her.
“Wonderbolts show, 2 days away, date’s on the tickets. Please be there, it’ll be my last show, and it’ll be special, one last chance. See you there!” With that Rainbow took off out the same window she had smashed flying in (and apparently missed twice) and was gone in the blink of an eye.
Twilight stood in the middle of the room, looking between where Rainbow had been standing, her freshly smashed window, and the ticket at her hooves. Her mind flashed images of the rainbow maned mare. The mare that had taken over her thoughts for months and even after being betrayed by her would not leave her mind in peace. She should be enraged with what Rainbow had done, and she was, for a while. But eventually her anger had subsided. It had taken less then a day, all it took was that one rant of screaming at Rainbow, and her anger was gone. For some reason she still couldn't stay mad.
She shook the thoughts from her head as she remembered Rainbow’s smile. There was something off about it, something… disturbing. Her eyes were wide, heavy bags under them as if she hadn’t slept in days. But what was worse was the fact the she kept mumbling to herself. She heard it before she had turned around, but she thought it was her imagination, but after actually watching Rainbow do it she knew she had actually heard it. There was something unnerving about it.
“We could talk about this.” Twilight sighed sadly, speaking to the mare she wished had stayed longer. Her mind was racing for an answer to her feelings. She knew what she should feel, but she couldn’t feel it no matter how hard she tried. She truly wanted to forgive her. But she knew she couldn’t, she may want to forgive her, but that wouldn’t fix all their problems, that wouldn’t fix her new trust issues she knew would be showing soon. It wouldn’t fix her broken heart, either.
She looked down at the ticket at her hooves. “One last chance for what?” Twilight asked, half expecting her books to answer her. When they didn’t she picked up the ticket with her magic and read it carefully. It was for a Wonderbolts show in Cloudsdale, the day after tomorrow; well, the day after today, since it was probably past midnight. Twilight stared at the ticket for a second; half wondering what Rainbow was going to do, and half wondering why she was considering going.
Sure, maybe she wanted to forgive her. Maybe she wanted her life to return to normal. But something still told her she shouldn’t, one nagging thought that told her it would happen again. She studied history enough to know history often repeated itself. She was scared of it happening again. She could barely live after the first time, but if it were to happen again…
Twilight’s thoughts trailed off as another took their place. Why shouldn’t she go? She could at least give Rainbow a chance. She may even do something that could quell the doubt that hung in her mind.
“One last chance.” Twilight repeated to herself, shelving all other thoughts for after the show. She could at least show Rainbow the decency of giving her a chance. Even if her mind told her she didn’t deserve it. Even if her books said she should never want to see Rainbow again, her books had been wrong more then once when it came to Rainbow Dash, maybe they could be wrong again. She hoped they would be wrong again.
-_-_-_-
“You think she’ll come?” Rainbow asked doubtfully, wings flapping slowly as she made her way back to what she had come to call her ‘comfort cloud’.
She will be there, all you need to do is make sure you give your life for her and her alone; no other pony should get it.
“Don’t worry; I know how to make sure she knows it’s for her. The announcer owes me a favour anyway.”
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I can't help but suspect I know what's coming...still can't wait though!
if your going to do what I think you are going to do, this will ruin the story for me.
I had a feeling that, that was what Rainbow might do. Hopefully not though. Being the one that knows her best, was that why Fluttershy was acting even more subdued than normal? Did she fear for Rainbow Dash's mental well being?
Suicide? Really? I know RD is a bit rash but that? I hope i'm wrong
2238625
I decided on this a long time ago, there will be more reasons next chapter (whenever I get around to writing that) don't rule out anything as stupid before you've read it. I've read stories where there is a suicide attempt after just a regular break up, so this is hardly the most far-fetched idea.
2238177
Sorry to hear that, though I advise at least sticking with the story to see it, because I have dropped hints throughout the entire story leading up to this, and more will be explained next chapter, I ask you to give me a chance to prove this isn't as stupid an idea as some people may think it is.
2238515
...
maybe
...
2238130
Glad to see someone is excited for this, most others have doubts about this, but we'll have to see next chapter to know if their fears will come true.
I'm on the verge of insanity myself, just reading this. I can't take it; I'm way too weak for stories like this. Also, I think I know what's coming...Hmm
This verges on some thin ice. I know those thoughts, I've had them myself. As much as I'd like to put this down now, I can't help but want to know what happens.
uh-oh
This... is how people die sometimes. They think that they have nothing to live for if they hurt the one most dear to them, that it would be better to prevent it from happening again by removing themselves from their lives.
But really, some part of me wants Rainbow to actually do it, to commit suicide. Pity is one of my favorite expressions.
I... kinda wanna see an AMV to Fozzy's Judas for this fic ¯\_(ツ)_/¯