The Path of the Righteous Pony

by Steventheman

Valhalla

Fluttershy opened her eyes. There was only light. She thought she might have been in a human hospital, until she heard a familiar voice.

"Welcome, Knight Fluttershy Braveheart, Element Bearer and Maiden of Valhalla."
Fluttershy knew that she was dead, and that she had failed her quest. She sat up, and saw the great hall. Warriors from every time period ate, drank and laughed with each other. The Gods were at a far table, also eating and drinking. Fluttershy noticed a tall, dark-skinned human. It was Samuel L. Jackson.

"Samuel L. Jackson! I have failed!" Fluttershy cried. He said nothing, but he smiled and gestured for Fluttershy to stand up.
"You have not failed. I was not totally honest with you. Ballbreaker the Psychotic...has been dead for twenty-four years. She stalks Hades' Fury, a region of the Hills of Blood."
"Then I must...kill someone who is already dead?"
"This time, it is not a battle of blade and bullet. A true badass knows when there is a time for diplomacy. Convince her to give you her Element."
"I will do as you command...But, can I ask one more thing?"
"Yes, my child?"
"How is the Omnicide still going?"
"The FTLCV Omnicide has been on autopilot since the mutiny that killed Ballbreaker, as well as all of the crew. She killed all the crew, but not before they inflicted grave injury on her. She died the instant the last mutineer was slain."

Fluttershy nodded, and turned to walk out of the Great Hall. A hand stopped her. She turned around and saw the kindly face of Billy Mays, the God of Commerce.

"Hi! Billy Mays here with some advice! They say that Ballbreaker has a weakness for music. I'm saying she is literally harmed by it. I don't know why."
"Thank you, Billy Mays."
"I wish you good luck!"

---

Fluttershy arrived at Hade's Fury. The landscape had been scorched by millennia of war. There was not a single living thing in the area. Except one.

Fluttershy looked at the human woman. She had blood red hair, a tattered set of armor and she was much taller than any other human Fluttershy had seen. She swung a large sword and planted it into the burnt ground.

"What the hell is this?" she shouted. "Are they letting pink-haired motherfuckers into Valhalla now? You cannot possibly be here to defeat me, Ballbreaker the Glorious!"
"I'm here to defeat you." Fluttershy stated.
Ballbreaker laughed. "What?! You? Don't talk such shit! I am the Galaxy's greatest warrior!" she boasted.
"You were." Fluttershy said. With that, her eyes began glowing, and the ground around her erupted into flame. A distant metal tune enamated from the ground, the air, even Fluttershy herself. (She began to feel lyrics form in her head, of a song that no mortal had ever heard before.

Dovahkiin, Dovahkiin, naal ok zin los vahriin,

Wah dein vokul mahfaeraak ahst vaal!

Ahrk fin norok paal graan fod nust hon zindro zaan,

Dovahkiin, fah hin kogaan mu draal!

Ballbreaker recoiled. "How do you know that song!?"
Fluttershy's voice grew deeper, and dark clouds formed in the sky. The fires around her grew more violent.

Huzrah nu, kul do od, wah aan bok lingrah vod,

Ahrk fin tey, boziik fun, do fin gein!

Wo lost fron wah ney dov, ahrk fin reyliik do jul,

Voth aan suleyk wah ronit faal krein

Ahrk fin zul, rok drey kod, nau tol morokei frod,

Rul lot Taazokaan motaad voth kein!

Sahrot Thu'um, med aan tuz, vey zeim hokoron pah,

Ol fin Dovahkiin komeyt ok rein!

Ballbreaker dropped her sword. "No mortal knows this song...It is only known by...Dragonborn..."
Flames danced in the sky in a glorious light, as lightning began to form in the clouds.

Dovahkiin, Dovahkiin, naal ok zin los vahriin,

Wah dein vokul mahfaeraak ahst vaal!

Ahrk fin norok paal graan fod nust hon zindro zaan,

Dovahkiin, fah hin kogaan mu draal!

Ahrk fin Kel lost prodah, do ved viing ko fin krah,

Tol fod zeymah win kein meyz fundein!

Alduin, feyn do jun, kruziik vokun staadnau,

Voth aan bahlok wah diivon fin lein!

The space warlady clutched her head, as the clouds and flames grew larger, and a torrent of rain battered the landscape.

Nuz aan sul, fent alok, fod fin vul dovah nok,

Fen kos nahlot mahfaeraak ahrk ruz!

Paaz Keizaal fen kos stin nol bein Alduin jot,

Dovahkiin kos fin saviik do muz!

Fluttershy looked at Ballbreaker, now cowering before the mare. She looked in the distance, as massive tornadoes began to devastate Hade's Fury. The tornadoes caught alight, before sparking.

Dovahkiin, Dovahkiin, naal ok zin los vahriin,

Wah dein vokul mahfaeraak ahst vaal!

Ahrk fin norok paal graan fod nust hon zindro zaan

Dovahkiin, fah hin kogaan mu draal!

The flaming, electric tornadoes began drawing water, and flooding the ground beneath them. Ballbreaker the Psychotic turned around, only to see a flaming, electric flood of tornadoes engulf her. Within an instant, the warlady was gone, and the weather had returned to normal. Fluttershy looked around, only to see Samuel L. Jackson warp to her.

"I saw the battle from the Great Hall. You have all the Elements, except for one..." he said. "Join our court as the God of Animals. You will be given infinite power, and every day is a battle!" he said.
Fluttershy thought about her animals at home, as well as her friends. "But what about my friends?"
"They are but mortals. You are Einjerhar."
"But...I can't leave my friends." Fluttershy said. "They mean too much to me."
"You would turn away infinite power, infinite glory and eternal battle for five mortals, and a group of animals?"
"They are my friends." Fluttershy said.
"But they are mortal! You can di-"
"I said, they are my friends!" Fluttershy said. "And if it came down to a choice between godhood at the cost of my friends, or turning my back on the whole thing, then I reject godhood!"

Fluttershy turned her back on Samuel L. Jackson. He offered no resistance as she walked away, until he called over to Fluttershy.

"What now, lord?"
"You sacrificed your power, your glory, and your afterlife for your friends? I have never seen more loyalty in...forever." he said. "That...that is true heroism."

Fluttershy felt herself become immensely powerful. Her eyes glowed, and her lightsaber deployed itself, to show a deep violet.

"You have all six elements. Now..." Samuel L. Jackson said, opening a portal. "Go home, victorious."

Fluttershy stepped through the portal. A bright light blinded her.

Comments

[Drynwhyl]

Hell yes.

[bebo31]

FUS RO DAH!!