The Path of the Righteous Pony

by Steventheman

Stilwater

Big Mac looked up at the stars, in his small clearing in the orchard. The stars were once again out in their radiant glory. Luna had outdone herself on this night.

The last time he saw Fluttershy, she was going to Komato space. He didn't know what a Komato was, but for some reason, it sounded like a vegetable. Maybe a cross between a kiwi and a tomato...

While he pondered these questions of the Universe, he didn't notice a lavender mare walk to him, levitating a telescope and looking upwards. He didn't notice her until a telescope hit him in the face.

"Sorry!" Twilight said, a panicked expression on her face. "Sorrysorrysorry I didn't mean to hit you!"
Big Mac grunted in pain. "Nah, it's fine."
"What are you doing out here on your own?"
"Looking at the stars."
"Looks like we're here on similar business. There's a comet due in about thirty minutes."
"A comet?"
"Yeah. The Comet of Victory. During the Nightmare Insurrection, the Comet appeared before Nightmare Moon, and she took it as a sign that she was going to win the Siege of Canterlot. She had her forces attack, and they were cut down in the thousands by the Royal Guard."
"Would I be able to see it?"
"Yes, but not as good."
"Oh."

Big Mac and Twilight sat in silence while she set up her telescope, until a brilliant light flashed. Twilight's expression turned to utter joy as the comet flashed by. Big Mac himself couldn't help but smile at the comet. If it was the Comet of Victory, three days after he wished upon The Heart, then surely it meant something. Even if he told Pinkie that he never believed in the stars.

---

"Gat!" The Boss called out.
"What? What d'you want?"
"Have you seen this on the news?" The Boss said, in his thick Cockney accent. He pointed towards a diamond-encrusted, gold plated plasma television. "There's been some kind of fucking disaster in Australia."
"No shit?" Johnny Gat said. "How come no one noticed?"
"Hell if I know." The Boss said. He got up from his chair, and sat in one behind it, facing a stripper pole. His homies were crowded around the stripper, cheering and offering money.
"Boss, we need to talk business a second."
"Hm?" The Boss said. "What?"
"We're the most powerful gang in Stilwater. We need to expand! New York, LA, Detroit-"
"The fuck you want to go to Detroit for?" The Boss asked, in genuine curiosity.
"Okay, forget Detroit. But the Saints are big. This isn't big fish in small pond. This is a fucking shark in a fish bowl."
"So what are you saying?"
"I'm saying, that Shaundi and Pierce go out and start to put the Saints in other cities. Stilwater's too small for us."
"I like the way you think, Johnny. I almost think that it was worth rescuing you from that hospital."

---

Fluttershy looked over the city of Stilwater. It was definitely smaller than the Komato city, and much less advanced. She had been asked by the UNETB about her sudden return, but they were understanding when she lied about a family emergency in Stilwater.

A human military helicopter flew over the city, before firing a barrage of rockets at a group of cars, underneath Fluttershy's ship. Several tanks, marked with the word "SWAT" sped over, before firing at several purple-suited humans. The purple humans fired back, wiping out the SWAT team in minutes. Fluttershy found the airport, and landed.

Fluttershy walked out of the restricted area. Humans pointed at her, others whispered to each other. A human with long hair, wearing very little produced a camera and took a photo of Fluttershy. She did her best to ignore the humans, but in the end, Fluttershy took off on a full sprint away from the crowd.She ran down an alleyway, before colliding with a man in a purple suit.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" Fluttershy said. The human looked down at her.
"Watch where you're going!" he scolded, before dusting himself off and walking away. Fluttershy watched him go, before continuing down the alley. The smell was horrible, and Fluttershy saw a homeless human, drinking a bottle of whisky. He called over to Fluttershy.

"Hey! You're not like anything I've seen before!"
"Oh...hi." Fluttershy said, keeping a fair distance.
"You from around here?"
"No...I'm from another planet."
"Far out!" the hobo exclaimed. "Word of advice, the guys in purple are Saints. I don't mean that as in they're good, religious folk. I'd stay away from them."
"Well...I was actually looking to meet their leader."
The hobo coughed, and chuckled. "That psycho!? Listen, he'll kill you before you said hi! Stay away from him like the motherfucking clap!"
"I must defeat him. He holds the Element of Style."
"The Element of what?"
"Style. Samuel L. Jackson has sent me on a mission to defeat him. I have bested the greatest warriors in the galaxy, and he is one of them. He must fall to my lightsaber."
"Ho-holy shit! You don't say! Well, I shouldn't keep you. Go and kick some ass!"

Fluttershy walked away from the hobo. She walked into another street. It was less crowded, except for a lone Saint.

Fluttershy walked behind the Saint. He stopped, and began tying his shoe. Fluttershy activated her lightsaber, and leapt onto his back.

"What the fuck!? Get the fuck off me, man! I ain't got shit! This is bullshit!"
"Shut up." Fluttershy said. "Where is The Boss?"
"Fuck off."
Fluttershy headbutted him in the back of the head. "Where is The Boss?!"
"I want my fucking rights and a phone call. I ain't done shit, man!"

Fluttershy burnt a small wound into his cheek with the lightsaber. "One more time!"
"Okay, okay! He's in the Hotel right now!"
"Where is that?"
"Bavogian Plaza! Just let me go, bitch!"

Fluttershy let the Saint go. He reached into his pocket and produced a pistol. Fluttershy cut the Saint's arm off, and flagged down a taxi.

---

The taxi arrived at the Saint's Hideout. Fluttershy saw a group of Saints outside, drinking and smoking. She crept up to them, before dispatching them all in one sweep of her lightsaber. She looked over to the entrance, to see a single man, with a shaved head, holding a set of keys, and a katana.

"Oh, the fuck is this!?" he said, in a different accent to every other human in Stilwater. "Right, whoever cut these poor bastards in two is getting a bloody hiding!"

Fluttershy swiped at him. The man jumped back. "What the hell are you?"
"Where is The Boss?"
"You're looking at him. Now tell me why you think it's acceptable to go up to a charming group of men and women and cut them in two?"
Fluttershy didn't answer him. "I have a mission from Valhalla."
"Oh, really?" The Boss said. "What is that, then?"
"I must take your element."
"You'll take it after I'm done pissing on your corpse." The Boss said, before swiping at Fluttershy with his sword. Fluttershy dodged, and slashed at The Boss again. The lightsaber struck him on the leg. He shouted in anger and pain, before stabbing at Fluttershy. She avoided the blade again, only to be met by a shoe in the face. Fluttershy flew back, and struck a car. The Boss stabbed again, missing Fluttershy by an inch. She swiped with her lightsaber, and caught the Boss in the stomach. He fell back, and laid still on the floor. Fluttershy got up and turned around.

The Boss drew a Desert Eagle, and fired. Fluttershy felt a sharp pain in her chest, before looking down and seeing a gunshot wound. The Boss smiled, before he coughed up blood, and lay still.

Fluttershy felt the world fade, before falling to the ground, a puddle of blood forming around her.

Comments

[bebo31]

ouch!!!