Remember me?

by Sugar Moon

Chapter Three (AKA Your move Fox-Sama)

Walking through Ponyville town square, Rainbow Dash felt as if she was in a dream. With her offical Wonderbolt hat, glasses, saddlebags and assorted paraphenalia (available at all good sporting goods retailers now) she was ready to camp outside the Ponyville arena to await her idols and their inevitable pleas for her to join them. Of course she'd play it cool, look aloof and unfased by their presence. She wasn't no starstruck fan slobbering for an autograph. Besides she already had them all. No, she was Wonderbolt material and they were finally going to recognise it. Yep, big changes were going to happen around here.

Oh yeah, that's right ladies, future Wonderbolt just passing through Dash thought as she walked passed the neatly organised stalls of the market square. She was having far too much fun imagining herself in her new future. As she did most days when she wasn't pranking. Or napping. Or... actually that's about all she did really.

Hey Carrot Top, remember that time you wouldn't give me my food free? Suck it, I'm a Wonderbolt filly. Hey Aj, not letting me sleep in your trees? Not anymore, I'm a Wonderbolt. Also naming your trees? That's all kinds of messed up and it must be true because a Wonderbolt said it. And I'm a Wonderbolt. Hey Twi and Spitfire, guess what? I'm a Wonder-

That thought was cut off as she tried to process what she was seeing. The princess of eggheads, the ultimate ruler of all things nerdy and “smart” was casually chatting away with the second coolest pony in Equestria? With her idol and not-so-distant-future boss? Nah, she couldn't have seen that. I mean really? What would poss...possessee.. make Spitfire talk to Twilight.

But she saw them. Walking all nonchalant down the street as if it was no big deal. She could practically hear Twilight in her head. Oh hey everypony, I'm Twilight Sparkle. I love books. And egg-shaped heads. Isn't great that I know big words. I also know how to make breakfast without burning down my house unlike someponies. Tehee-hee. I'm also really good friends with the One-and-only Spitfire. It isn't a big deal really. It's not like she's the leader of the Wonderbolts and basically awesome ponysonified.

Her limited edition 'Soarin Shades' slide to the end of her snout in shock.

Jaw slack as she tried to think of anything, anything that could convey what she just witnessed.

But the words wouldn't come as she froze there, mouth open, as the hamster in her brain started working overdrive in a vain attempt as to comprehend just what was going on.

---

“So what do you call this place anyway?” Spitfire asked.

She was in a rather rustic establishment. A few tables were scattered around the place in a seemingly random pattern but it was obvious to anypony that the place was a pub first and a restaurant second. Course if you asked Twilight you'd find out that each table was strategically placed to diffuse the magic of all the unicorns in the room, in accordance with the Dresden principle first established under Storm Front. Well, it was that or the inebriated patrons had kept knocking the tables around and the staff were too lazy to fix the. Twilight didn't think that very likely though.

The barmare was a purple maned and coated earth pony with a sweet but bacchanalian grin, looked over the bar. She obviously enjoyed her job as she sneakily sipped a few drinks when she thought nopony was looking. The other side of the pub not occupied by Twilight and Spitfire was screened off from the other, for as much to give the dinners privacy as the revellers.

A loud yell emanated from behind the screen followed by a chorus of “Chug, chug, chug”

Spitfire had to admit she liked the atmosphere in here. Much better than those stuffy places in Canterlot.

“Hmm?” Twilight said from behind her menu, scanning the list as thoroughly as she would a Kneel haymun novel. Any excuse to read and she'd latch onto it.

“I said what do you call this place? I think I like it.” Spitfire said followed by oddly-timed cheering from behind the screen.

“It is nice isn't it? A bit loud but they do the best daisy sandwhiches known to mare.” Twilight said almost beginning to drool.

More cheering erupted from behind the screen followed by a shout of “Cider shots all round.”

“Really? Wow, I gotta get me one of those bad boys.”

“You have to. It's one of Berry's signature dishes. That and the 'Drunken chest' but I have no idea what in the hay that is.” Twilight laughed.

Oh ponyfeathers.

“Berry's?” Spitfire asked, a nervous look now visible on her face.

“Mhmm” Twilight nodded “ She owns and runs the place. With a little help from Barley and Wheat brew that is. Are you ok Spits? You don't look so good.”

“Oh I'm fine hun. ” Another cheer came from behind the screen. Spitfire now had a good idea who was responsible for all the noise and she wasn't happy about it one bit.

The whole gorram team is here. I can't let them see me. Soarin will never let me live it down, especially after the chewing out I gave him out over it. Plus they'll ruin my one chance with Twilight. She finds out I've lied to her and that's it, good night neighenna. Wait. Relax Spitty, relax. Soarin and the guys are all the way behind the screen. They have absolutely no reason to leave the bar part and come over here. Why would they? The bar's full of booze. We'll just eat our meal and leave without anypony being any the wiser. her cocky grin settled back onto her face.

“I'm great Twilight. Now, how about we order now? I've got to try those daisy sandwhiches you've been raving about.” She flashed her best flirty smile and Twilight giggled.

“Okay, but I can't let you pay for everything. Allow me to pay for my half at least.”

Spitfire started to talk, to say how she just couldn't allow a mare as beautiful as Twilight to dirty her hoofs by digging around for bits, while it would be a pleasure for her to hoof the bill. But that's when a phrase she dreaded came from behind her.

“Back in a sec you pansies, I'll grab more pie.” Soarin said chuckling, as he trotted into the restaurant half, only to spot a very familiar fiery mane.

“Yo' mon Cap-e-tan. Is that you?” he yelled across the room.

Double ponyfeathers

---

Author's Note:

So only five days later than promised. That's... okay yeah that's terrible. I know I promised the whole update something every fortnight but It's a little harder than I imagined.

Anyway been sitting on this chapter for a while but I kinda wanted this tale to only be in three parts. But I think it flows better in four so here we are.

Also lets see who finds the most references.

And again your move Fox-sama. I'm waiting

Comments

[TheRustyBucket]

1579561
Oh god, the story where Twilight unintentionally seduces everyone in existence.

[Hobbestc]

Cute and enjoyable so far. Keep 'em coming!

[The Lone Shadow]

Harry Dresden, everyone's favourite wizard for hire. And 'Storm Front', the title of the book he first appeared in.

As for Spitfire...... Well, shit.

[Lelouch Vi Britania]

2478609
nope, the series where twilight seduces everything in existence

[Boss_Hoss1]

This situation is just getting better by the moment!

[Snowy]

2478681
Is he really a wizard named Harry? And can he do my birthday party? and how many of these questions do you think I can get away with asking before he shoots me with that revolver he likes so much?

[Twisassin]

2478907 need to add a word to that

nope, the series where twilight unintentionally seduces everything in existence

[Knight of Cerebus]

2478609 actually there are many more of those stories than just that. It's better clarified as "the story where Twilight unintentionally starts a supporting character harem".

[Lelouch Vi Britania]

2479006>>2478988
ok, how about the series where twilight unintentionally wins at life?

[Twisassin]

2479060 works for me

[Knight of Cerebus]

2479060 that would be any story with her character tag, by virtue of her being Twilight Sparkle

[Minitheif]

I haven't even started this story yet, but I hope I'm the first to post this.

I may or may not comment after reading.

[Thorbinator]

"Dresden principle first established under Storm Front."

I see what you did there.

[Lelouch Vi Britania]

2479150
agreed

[nightmaster0]

Great story. I'm looking forward to Spitfire's reaction when she realizes just who Twilight is.

[Fox-Sama]

So you went and called me out in your story? It almost looks like you want a fight. LOL

hummm. lying about who she is will end as soon as Twilight go's to the show she was given free tickets for. so the cat wont be in the bag for long and even then Twilight will under stand that Spitfire did not want to use her reputation to make a friend, she wants to just be spitfire.

I knew Dash was going to be a problem for this story but wow, you are making her sound like diamond tiara.

[Satto Kez]

ok beautiful chapter although is a bit short, love em so keep em coming!

[Revenant Wings]

You updated this! It's short, but it's still interesting and you still updated!

derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTIvMDYvMjMvMDhfNDNfMDhfNDJfMTY2NDdfX3NhZmVfcmFyaXR5X2FuaW1hdGVkX2NoZWVyaW5nIl1d/16647__safe_rarity_animated_sweet-and-elite_cheering.gif.gif

[MasterSOMA]

Sweet i'm happy to see this story updated, good stuff so far! Can't wait for more!

[Grey Warden]

Yes an update!!!

[Exedeth]

can't wait for more keep up the good work!

[Raven Flight]

Great update! Love this story---glad to see it continue...Now I gotta look up fox-sama a and see what the fuss is about :-)

[TheRustyBucket]

2479006
2478907
I already know there's a series. It's just that the author calls it the TWD series.

[-Brutus]

I love how Raindow Dash is shellshocked, hope she doesn't try to "warm" up Twilight so she can get close to Spitfire because..well that is just pathetic.

[xBeeCharm]

So... apparently I'm a couple months late to this party. That's fine I guess. It's not like you stumble on a SpitLight story every other day. I can only recall around three, the latest one being the Twixileefire,'The Teacher, The Sorceress and The Wonderbolt' series, as someone mentioned.

I really want to like like this story. I already like it, but it's littered with missing punctuation and words, and grammar mishaps... Things have improved in the latest chapter, but it was pretty distracting in the previous two. It seems like a ton of these could have been fixed from a couple readings, or an editor, that sort of thing.
Things like

Unfortunately Spitfire didn't better than to not ask Twilight Rhetorical questions.

had me utterly confused. I'm going out on a limb and guessing it was meant to say something like, "Unfortunately, Spitfire didn't know better than to ask Twilight rhetorical questions.", which itself is a bit of a mouthful. Also adding to that, saying Spitfire had said the previous sentence 'rhetorically' was a bit redundant as well.
Having extra letters:

Had this pony been coming to here shows

The sentence itself is also a bit... messy, along with back-and-forth changes in past and present tense afterwards
Extra punctuation

sync with each other without it.?”

Missing:

Question. How did you get to Cloudsdale. You're a unicorn.

Question mark

a ticket?If you like

Space

Isn't great that I know big words.

"Isn't it great that..."

You know, that's a funny phrase in itself. Without contractions, it would read as, "is not it great...", English is such a fickle thing...

Hey Aj,

Capitalization

Yeah(,) they sound great(. or ! + capitalize ->) any of those?

Comma, etc

Speaking of commas, I found the actually speaking sentences aloud helps find where commas belong.

She wasn't no starstruck fan

That double negative
ANYWAYS

As I was saying. I like the story so far, and it's early enough that there's still a lot of time for things to run their course. 'Things' being the Rainbow Dash conflict, the actual Wonderbolts event, the explanation as to why Spitfire didn't return to see Twilight, captain Spitfire reveal, Twilight "Element of Magic; Princess Celestia's Most Faithful Student; Vanquisher of the Ursa Minor; (Sister to the Captain of the Royal guard; Most favouritest filly of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza; Friend to Princess Luna; Conquer-er of Discord; Foil-er of Queen Chrysalis;) Liberator of Nightmare Moon" Sparkle, that sort. Is there a significance to Spitfire questioning what Twi meant be a Wonderbolts show in Ponyville last chapter? 'Cause then I'm a little confused as to why they're staying in Ponyville in the first place... unless, they're on a bit of a vacation or something?

I'm guessing this takes place before season 2, or at least before Hurricane Fluttershy. I'll also guess that Twilight didn't recognize Spitfire in her suit since she only remembers her as the yellow filly. I assume Spitfire's explanation is something along the lines of training, and maybe Twilight being busy as Celestia's student (not that Spitfire knows that) around the same time. Twi probably hung out in the Palace library instead of the public Canterlot one by that point.

I do like that you haven't just copy-and-pasted Rainbow's personality onto Spitfire. I guess the "Wonderbolts Academy" episode helped flesh her out. The hardworking, thoughtful leader
I do wonder how... nosy your Rainbow will be in their affairs. Certainly won't sabotage her best friend... right?

Finishing this as I polish off another round of Whose Line videos...
Long comment is long, and all that snazzy jazz
Will be watching this! Good luck writing, have fun

[Sugar Moon]

2478613 Thanks, I'll try.

2478681 eeyup.

2478880

2478951 Things are getting a bit more complicated for spits.

2479230

2479258 Little bit on the nose but yeah.

2479298 That could be a little while off. I find her being oblivious far too funny to end it just yet.

2479467 Now you have to keep up your side of the bargain.
Yeah the dash thing. I think I went a bit far with that one. (note to self stop trying to be funny)

2479634 Thanks. It's a bit short but mainly because it's a good place to cut the chapter. Otherwise it would of ran into the next scene and wouldn't have ended quite so nicely.

2479668 Thanks. Glad you like it.

2479701 Hopefully you won't have to wait too long. Although I am rather lazy.

2479733 2479749 YES! First person to notice it. It's a little reference but I thought it would be nice. I'll try my best.

2479741

2479752 Thanks. Please do and check out his story Time in Equestria. That's a great ship.

2480284 Yeah I really need to get a prereader/editor. I should at least reread over the story before I post it. In my defence most of my mistakes are actually due to my poor typing skills. I write pretty much the entire story down on paper before typing it up and adding a few extra scenes, that usually I skip a word thinking I've already written it or adding extra letters because I'm trying to type it up as fast as possible. Well, least I'm getting better. That's always a good thing.

Anyway to answer your questions:
(1)Yep it's set in season two.
(2)They're in town to perform a show and arrived early. It's the last show of the season so they're celebrating early, sort of. It's also why RD is heading to camp outside Ponyville arena.

To me Spitfire has always been very different to RD. Obviously there is probably similarities but she's her own character. I kind of imagine her as a less world weary/cynical Mal Reynolds. A strong captain going above and beyond for her crew.

Thanks for the great comment. I always love to hear them and hopefully I'll stop making those mistakes you pointed out.

[Dark Shade 75]

Please update more frequently!

[SeventhBrony]

all good, all round! this is SO worth the like, fave and FOLLOW

[Satto Kez]

is this going to be a short story or are you going to drag it out alittle? lets just say i hope its not a short story

[Lambda462]

“Yo' mon Cap-e-tan"

That's all I have for this.

[L4]

I can't wait for more and you chapters are improving! :D this is kind of a rare pairing and I like it X3

[Sugar Moon]

2481959 I'll try my best. The plan is to update at least one of my stories once a fortnight. So fingers crossed.

2482982 Twilight loves science!

2483756 Glad you like it. Thanks for all three and I hope I can keep it up.

2483957 Yeah that is a great fic. I started writing this one when Wrabbit was about a few chapters in to his story because it seemed pretty obvious that spitfire wasn't going to win despite, arguably, having the best reason and having Twilight already feel the same way about her.

2485238 I haven't really decided yet haha. Honestly the story has already been stretched since it originally ended in the library without them even going to dinner. But that ending was,well, rubbish. And I'm being kind. Everybody who read the story seemed to agree. You only have to read a few old comments to see that while most enjoyed the story, the ending was far too abrupt and ruined a lot of decent set ups. For example everybody really wanted to see RD's reaction. Anyway I'm rambling and not answering your question very well. I have a rough idea of where I want to finish it, though from what I've read in the comments everybody thinks this will go on longer than I thought it would. Maybe I'll stretch it, as I do have an idea of how to make it last. It even has a few nifty set-ups/resolutions but I don't want to make the story last longer than necessary. Pacing is very important and I don't want to ruin that.

Tl:DR Probably as long as I can strike a good balance.

2491415 It is a rare one isn't it? Other than Wrabbit's stories Spitty usually gets shipped with Dash or Soarin. Thank you and I'm glad you are enjoying the story.

2491399 Ah, got to love Trek.

[Satto Kez]

2494803
well I for one am glad to hear that its longer than the original! the main reason i want this to be a longer story is that this is a rare couple and id like to see how thing's work out with them, even though its through someone else's point of view! and yes though wrabbit has a amazing story its not focused on Twifire .... they need an emote for spitfire.... anyway no need to hear me ramble, im just here for this amazing story!

[Paradox949]

After reading Furor's cancelled half finished TwiFire fic on dA, I just had to find more of the pairing. So here I am, and enjoy it I did. Hopefully this will blow up in Spitfire's face, the reactions will be great. I await more.

[ForceUser]

Loving the story!

[Rexus]

i love this story but if i may add a opinion
MAKE IT LONGER!!!!!! MAKE IT LONGER!!!!!! MAKE IT LONGER!!!!!! MAKE IT LONGER!!!!!! PLEASE DON'T STOP AT FOUR!!!!

[Slice141]

Very good hope you update soon

[werewolf435]

3115055 He's basically updated this thing once a month.... sort of like a period really.

[Slice141]

3131120 sweet thanks

[Vates Despero]

References Found;
1) Dresden Files
2) Firefly

[guilmon21]

update

[Cookays]

So I'm assuming this story is dead

[articunos bitch]

Will this story be updated or is it dead? I'm gonna be disappointed if it's no more.

[Martin Blue]

Hope this story will update!.

[guilmon21]

please update

[Archangel of the Silent]

Man, I'm favoriting this. But, you have got to get around to updating it!

[Satto Kez]

i wish this would continue...

[Janan]

eeyup: work hard and nothing can get in the way

[Janan]

You need to double the length of the chapters, and add at least three more. Then, I'd be bout as happy as Dicord when Twighlight saves his sorry ********

[Janan]

Also, I am on tiptoes waiting for the next installment I think it's called. Your skill rock better than bass through my skull. You would know something, that comment was based on the fact that without a steady and sturdy beat pounding through my head I'm a bit depressed