Two Best Friends Play: Equestria

by MisterMercenary

Chapter Six: You Salty, Bro?

A/N: Be warned, fighting game jargon and colored text.

Ponyville Library, Two Days Later, 12:45 P.M

Despite the excitement that had occurred two days ago, Matt and Pat were bored to hell and back. They hated the fact that they had to be cooped up in a library where they had to be hidden every time someone came in, and the only available source of amusement was books. They feared apathy had already reached them, so they made plans to go outside and look for something to do in Ponyville.

"What?" said Twilight when she heard about their plans.

"Come on, Twilight," Matt pleaded, "we don't have anything to do in here!"

"No!" she denied. "I won't have you leave the library. Think of the consequences! A media blitz, you two being exposed, mass hysteria, Princess Celestia herself banishing me because I harbored two potentially dangerous-"

But it was too late. Twilight looked over to see that Matt and Pat had already went to the door. With a "Bye, Twilight" from both of them, they opened the door to find Rainbow Dash standing outside. She froze when she saw them.

"Uh... hey, guys!" she greeted with an awkward grin.

"Why are you here?" Pat questioned.

"Oh, come on," Rainbow said in painfully forced playfulness, "can't a girl go to two of her best friends from another world to say hello?" The two humans narrowed their eyes.

"Do you really think we're that stupid?" asked Matt.

The pegasus sighed. "Look, I came here to apologize. I know I shouldn't have acted like I did back there. I was just trying to protect and defend my friends, like you did." She shivered. Pat smirked. "You can understand, right?" She put out a hoof. Matt stared at it for a little while. Rainbow winced, fearing that he wouldn't forgive her. She was pleasantly surprised when he did.

Matt shook her hoof and said, "Yeah. Yeah, I can."

Rainbow grinned. "Awesome! Thanks."

"No problem," Matt replied. He let go of Rainbow's hoof. "So, um, anything to do around here?" he asked.

"Yeah, preferably video game related." Pat added.

Rainbow put a hoof to her chin. "Hmm... video games... Oh!" she remembered. "Ponyville Arcade!"

"Very creative naming committee here," Matt sarcastically whispered to Pat.

"The arcade has tons of awesome games there! It's this way, guys! Follow me!" Rainbow dashed off. Matt and Pat followed. As they walked, ponies took notice of them. They made idle small talk about them, but for the most part they stayed out of the way and respected their space. The two were bewildered.

"You'd think that two humans walking around in a village full of ponies would cause something to happen," Pat said.

"Maybe they heard about my badass defense of you yesterday," Matt boasted.

"Yelling at a girl? Some badass defense."

"I needed to. I was sick of being treated as some sort of pariah."

"Wait, what did you say?"

"What?"

"You said you were sick of being treated as a pariah."

"Yeah. So?"

"Frankly, I'm surprised you know what the word 'pariah' even means."

"Ah, shut it, asshole." Matt pointed to a building up ahead. "Look, we're here." The place looked like an arcade you'd see in the Eighties; a small, white, square thing wedged between two other businesses. The giant red and blue neon sign above the entrance read PONYVILLE ARCADE. Rainbow Dash was standing near the door.

"What took you guys so long?" she asked. "I've been waiting forever."

"Um, Rainbow Dash," Pat said, "it's only been fifteen minutes."

"Yeah. For-ev-er!" Rainbow said. Matt and Pat facepalmed and went in to the joint. For them, going in was like ODing on nostalgia. Row after row of glowing coin-op machines were stacked against each other, with young fillies and colts sitting on stools with a bunch of bits lying on the floor next to them, playing to their hearts content.

"Woahhhh..." they said. Normally, an arcade back on Earth- if one could be found- would be absolutely deserted. The arcade scene had nearly died when consoles went into the mainstream in the Nineties. The men and women who grew up during the period before longed for something like this, and for Matt and Pat this was like reliving their childhood. Then they realized they didn't have any money.

Rainbow read the dejected looks on their faces when the realization came over them and said, "Oh, don't worry guys. I brought some money." She brought out a small satchel of bits from somewhere behind her and held it in her teeth.

"Where did you..." Matt asked.

"Are you really gonna question the lady now?" Pat interrupted. He grabbed it from Rainbow's mouth, turned around, and froze.

"Uh, Matt? You may want to see this," Pat said.

"Wha-" Matt stopped mid-sentence as he wheeled around. To their horror, they found dozens of little kids looking up at them and grinning widely. There was a whole sea of them.

One gray colt raised his voice. "Are- are you..."

They both responded, "Yes." The moments following were a maelstrom of questions and requests. Matt and Pat were swarmed by the kids, all asking for something.

"Where are you from?"

"Are there ponies where you come from?"

"Can I have your autograph?"

"Wanna play some Marevel 3?"

That last question raised the humans' eyebrows. Matt whistled loudly to get them to stop chattering.

"Alright," he said. "Who asked us if we wanted to play Marvel 3?"

A small, dark green unicorn colt with black mane raised his hoof. "Um, me, sir. And it's Mare-vel."

"What?" Matt questioned. The colt pointed to a newer-looking machine in the back. Mat and Pa looked over. In comparison to the other games, this one was bigger, brighter, and louder than the rest. It was about twice the size of a regular machine, and it had twice the shine to match. There were two stools and two sets of buttons. The screen was roughly the size of a flat-screen TV. On it, an intro movie was playing, displaying multiple ponies and other creatures fighting it out in freeze-frame. Above the display was a sign that said, in big, flashy lettering, "ULTIMATE MAREVEL VS COLTCOM 3".

"It's a Japonyese fighting game." the colt explained. "It's kinda weird."

"Yeah, we know." Pat said. "We have something like this where me and Pat come from."

"Oh, really?" the colt asked in surprise. "Then I guess I don't have to teach you how it works. Come on." The colt walked over to the machine. Matt and Pat followed, and with them, the massive crowd and Rainbow Dash. They argued that Pat was the better of them at Marvel based on their episode on Vanilla Marvel 3. Matt was standing on the left side while Pat sat down. The green colt took the right.

"Okay, then." Matt said. "What's your name, kid?"

"Glitch." the green unicorn replied.

"I got next!" a filly in the crowd said.

"Oh Jesus," Pat said to himself, "I have not heard that in a long time."

Glitch inserted four bits into the machine, one for each of them, and went to the character select screen with Pat. After a bit of bickering over character synchronicity and nationality, they had their character choices down. Pat went with Captain Equestria, Doctor Discord, and Hawkeye. Glitch decided to use the near-infallible Team Trenchcoat: Dante, Vergil, and Wesker. Pat wasn't amused when he saw this.

"Aw, you son of a..." Pat held his breath to stave off a tirade.

Glitch shrugged. "Hey, it works." The game had already taken them to the training stage.

"Live and let die! FIGHT!" the game announced.

"Yeah! Get hype!" Matt cried alongside it. The ponies in the crowd cheered. Pat first decided to play a keep-away game with Cap's Shield Slash and Discord and Hawkeye's assists. Glitch was unfettered, for Dante had overhead teleports. He did a jumping S on Cap, connecting and putting him in a hard knockdown. He followed up with a Cold Shower into Prop Shredder BnB, reducing Cap to two thirds of his health. Pat unwisely hard-tagged in Discord, allowing for a Stinger combo from Dante during his idle animation. Discord got up with a small chunk of health in the red and jumped up into a Hoof Dive. Dante countered this with Vergil's Rapid Slash before going into Million Dollars. Glitch canceled into Vergil's Spiral Swords near the end of Million Dollars and went for a Helmet Breaker combo that put an end to Discord. Cap went in, only to be subdued by a Lunar Phase mix-up.

Hawkeye was shoved onto the playing field. Pat desperately tried to prevent Glitch from getting in by playing a frenetic keep-away game with Level 3 X-Factor, but to no avail. Glitch effortlessly dodged the barrage of trick arrows with more teleports from Vergil. Vergil finally got in after avoiding insanely quick projectiles and finally finishing off Hawkeye with a Round Trip mix-up, ending the game and signaling seven letters that announced Pat's crushing defeat:

"PERFECT!"

The crowd behind them cheered wildly for Glitch. The young colt stood up and pumped his foreleg. He then looked over at Pat and stuck his hoof out.

"Good game, man." he said.

Pat frowned a bit before smiling and saying, "Good game." He got off the stool and walked over to Matt, letting the filly that had next go up against Glitch.

"You salty, bro?" Matt gently chided.

"Ah, shut up. You don't even play this game," Pat replied.

---

Ponyville Arcade, 2:45 P.M

Matt, Pat, and Rainbow left the arcade a good two hours later. It was fun to relive their childhood and all, but they still needed to find a way to get the hell out of Equestria. They were walking down the street when a newspaper collided with Matt's facial region. Matt peeled it off and read it. He froze with a mortified expression on his face.

"What the fuck?" he said. Pat and Rainbow Dash looked over his shoulder to the front page and instantly understood.

STRANGE CREATURES FROM ANOTHER WORLD FALL FROM THE SKY
Princess Unsure Of What To Make Of Situation

About a week or so ago, a pair of beings not native to Equestria fell from the sky in the small village of Ponyville, the town that is best known for being the place that houses the wielders of the Elements of Harmony. The two creatures were rescued from their dooms by native pegasi Flitter and Cloudchaser before being taken to the hospital for burns on their appendages. The hospital will not say just what caused them, though theories about being reactive to the magic in Equestria have been tossed around. They were last seen running away from media with Twilight Sparkle, better known as the Element of Magic. Little is known about these aliens aside from the fact that that they are male and speak Equestrian, and it seems that only time will tell if they will be boons or banes for ponykind.

They all turned their heads to stare at each other for a moment, then bolted towards Twilight's house.

---

Ponyville Library, 2:49 P.M

The three amigos raced towards the treehouse and burst through Twilight's door. The purple mare and dragon inside both yelped.

"What the hay was that for?" Twilight said, in between gasping for breath. Matt shoved the newspaper in her face, causing her to recoil. She took it in her hooves, read it, and fainted. Rainbow went over to check on her, while Spike burped out a letter from the Princess. If belching could ever be considered ominous, this was it.

"Uh-oh," he said. Spike gulped and started to read the letter aloud.

"'Dear Twilight,

By now, you probably know that the media and, by extension, most ponies, know of the two beings you ran off with a week ago. It's causing a lot of panic and hysteria in Equestria; some ponies think their the bringers of the apocalypse. To alleviate these fears, I will be holding an introduction ceremony at Canterlot Castle. It will be a bit like the Grand Galloping Gala: stuffy, boring, well-dressed ponies standing around and generally being absolute drags. Anyway, I will be holding the ceremony the day after tomorrow. I hope that these two men are normal, peaceable individuals and they won't generate a problem in Canterlot.

Dress nicely,

Princess Celestia'"

The conscious individuals in the room stood around nervously for a bit and let the weight of the situation sink in until Twilight stirred.

"Ugh... what happened? Why is Spike holding a letter?" she asked.

"Um," Matt hesitantly explained, "we're going to a formal gathering to meet this Princess Celestia lady." He nervously chuckled. She responded by fainting again.

Comments

[Wondrous Mind]

Yay Arcade games

[Crashing Star]

dun dun dun!!!

[SomeRandomTwat]

Dis gunna be good!

[Fat Autistic Weeaboo2222]

there fucked

[Bronze Medal Writer]

Just sent them a link to this amazing story in a tweet. I think they should really like it. Excellent story by the way.

[suijin228]

BROTHER! WE'RE IN EQUESTRIA NOW!

[patrickspud]

Me gusta

[XxgmanxX]

Pat is really fucked. Even though I like him a bit more than Matt, and considerably more than Woolie, I bet he can't act nice for more than five minutes.