iJSD:OFV! YES! FINALLY! Awesome chapter. Loved the internal conversation for Fluttershy, and her insult to AJ. It was cruel as hell, but damn. I did not see it coming. I'm just glad it resolved quickly.
This is good. Use of backstory that exist within the world but leaving as just that: backstory. Telling of events in past that builds the story's history (or character more appropriately) without derailing the story, that is something that speaks wonders and makes the entirety of the tale you are telling that much fuller.
Yet again you fail to disappoint. I am not only impressed with your insight, creativeness, and storyweaving, but also with the speed at which you were able to put together another chapter so well written. I rescind (or rather, revise) my statement from the previous chapter about not rushing perfection; you simply don't need to. Once again, it seems I'll be checking daily for updates.
Oh my goodness! And you was talking about loosing your skills when compared with "Bluebird"? No. A shipping-story turns out to be a multi-layered canvas, sophisticated at times yet breathtaking and beautiful. It warms my heart to see the kindness and forgiveness of Flutters, but hurts me to know how we lack these traits in people nowadays. And next again we face the reality - a necessity to protect whom you do care for - sometimes at all costs. Now it's not just about Trixie, finding a way to new self, but more of Shy - and AJ. Where lies the boundary between taking care and hurting? They both have to figure it out. There's a bittersweet aftertaste of a chapter. Saving Trixie is a fantasy-story, a part of a fairytale - even a legend. And the words AJ and Shy say to each other - it's somewhat harsh reality, where it takes time to find a way to the heart of even the best friends sometimes, a place, where words hurt more than a magic spell or a sword - and can cure as well. And - just I'd foreseen - growing anticipation of the previous chapters made even the slightest contact between Fluttershy and Trixie so meaningful, so intense and sensual that it simply takes one's breath away. Thank you so much for a beautiful chapter!
Thanks so much for all the feedback, guys. The response to this story's really been awesome, so I feel fully justified in 'yay'ing at this point.
1530846 Glad you liked it! I must admit I got this chapter done during something of a writing-binge over half term, so the update rate might fall back a bit now education's happening again. Basically, real life's tapping me on the shoulder and looking a bit impatient...
1531036 Thank you! Really glad you're still enjoying the story. I'm hoping to keep the AJ-Dash-Pinkie stuff as purely a side-plot, rather than going all full-on-secondary-narrative like what happened with the RariShy in Bluebird. I mean, it was fun to write but it probably didn't add all that much to the story!
1529964 Yeah, I have to admit that Flutters is probably the most potentially-scary of the mane 6, at least to me. (I think she's also by far the most fun to write for... )
1529465 Thanks! It's a relief to hear someone saying that, because that's basically what I was aiming for with making the sub-plots a bit more implicit, rather than actually narrating them directly.
1538156 Real life hits us all sooner or later, so I'd prefer you take your time so the hit is more of a punch in the shoulder instead of being run over by a truck. Can't have you going on us just to satisfy our impatience. Besides, being fairly new to the site I still have 'A Bluebirds Song' on my 'to read' list. (205k words... holy jeez.) Keep up the amazing work and we'll tough it out as long as needed; your stories are worth the wait.
All I could think of when fluttershy insulted aj was kelso saying "BURN!!!" from that 70's show. Also, yay conflict! I don't know which pony to side on though, I really hope trixie doesn't take advantage of fluttershy.
To summarize the rant I held against one of my friends about it:
I doubt that Fluttershy would say something that hurtful against her friends, ever. However, if she did, not even AJ would accept it just like that. Try and do this in real life and you'll lose a friendship, if they don't outright pummel you for it.
And I was so looking forward to things actually making sense
iJSD:OFV! YES! FINALLY! Awesome chapter. Loved the internal conversation for Fluttershy, and her insult to AJ. It was cruel as hell, but damn. I did not see it coming. I'm just glad it resolved quickly.
ANyway, Awesome chapter.
... WOW... Damn Flutters, I... That...
*Speechless*
This fic is VERY far from over, isn't it... YAY! 8D
HOLY HELL!!! That was cold what Fluttershy said, but she was also truthful. I can see AJ's attitude clashing with RD enough to drive her away.
This is good. Use of backstory that exist within the world but leaving as just that: backstory. Telling of events in past that builds the story's history (or character more appropriately) without derailing the story, that is something that speaks wonders and makes the entirety of the tale you are telling that much fuller.
Ouch. Ouch! OUCH!! I think Fluttershy really needs to talk to Twilight. Trixie isn't the only one the needs to exorcise inner demons.
[img]Doomed.jpg[/img]
Yet again you fail to disappoint. I am not only impressed with your insight, creativeness, and storyweaving, but also with the speed at which you were able to put together another chapter so well written. I rescind (or rather, revise) my statement from the previous chapter about not rushing perfection; you simply don't need to. Once again, it seems I'll be checking daily for updates.
Oh my goodness! And you was talking about loosing your skills when compared with "Bluebird"? No. A shipping-story turns out to be a multi-layered canvas, sophisticated at times yet breathtaking and beautiful. It warms my heart to see the kindness and forgiveness of Flutters, but hurts me to know how we lack these traits in people nowadays. And next again we face the reality - a necessity to protect whom you do care for - sometimes at all costs.
Now it's not just about Trixie, finding a way to new self, but more of Shy - and AJ. Where lies the boundary between taking care and hurting? They both have to figure it out.
There's a bittersweet aftertaste of a chapter. Saving Trixie is a fantasy-story, a part of a fairytale - even a legend. And the words AJ and Shy say to each other - it's somewhat harsh reality, where it takes time to find a way to the heart of even the best friends sometimes, a place, where words hurt more than a magic spell or a sword - and can cure as well.
And - just I'd foreseen - growing anticipation of the previous chapters made even the slightest contact between Fluttershy and Trixie so meaningful, so intense and sensual that it simply takes one's breath away.
Thank you so much for a beautiful chapter!
Dang, that Shy and AJ conversation, wow. I'm just floored here.
<- my face partway through the chapter.
Thanks so much for all the feedback, guys. The response to this story's really been awesome, so I feel fully justified in 'yay'ing at this point.
1530846 Glad you liked it! I must admit I got this chapter done during something of a writing-binge over half term, so the update rate might fall back a bit now education's happening again. Basically, real life's tapping me on the shoulder and looking a bit impatient...
1531036 Thank you! Really glad you're still enjoying the story. I'm hoping to keep the AJ-Dash-Pinkie stuff as purely a side-plot, rather than going all full-on-secondary-narrative like what happened with the RariShy in Bluebird. I mean, it was fun to write but it probably didn't add all that much to the story!
1529964 Yeah, I have to admit that Flutters is probably the most potentially-scary of the mane 6, at least to me. (I think she's also by far the most fun to write for... )
1529465 Thanks! It's a relief to hear someone saying that, because that's basically what I was aiming for with making the sub-plots a bit more implicit, rather than actually narrating them directly.
1538156
Real life hits us all sooner or later, so I'd prefer you take your time so the hit is more of a punch in the shoulder instead of being run over by a truck. Can't have you going on us just to satisfy our impatience. Besides, being fairly new to the site I still have 'A Bluebirds Song' on my 'to read' list. (205k words... holy jeez.) Keep up the amazing work and we'll tough it out as long as needed; your stories are worth the wait.
All I could think of when fluttershy insulted aj was kelso saying "BURN!!!" from that 70's show. Also, yay conflict! I don't know which pony to side on though, I really hope trixie doesn't take advantage of fluttershy.
This story is too juicy I can't take it anymore!!!!!!
Why are you amazing at writing....
I don't know if I should react like...
for Futters or
for Applejack.
Wow, what a bad chapter this was.
To summarize the rant I held against one of my friends about it:
I doubt that Fluttershy would say something that hurtful against her friends, ever.
However, if she did, not even AJ would accept it just like that. Try and do this in real life and you'll lose a friendship, if they don't outright pummel you for it.
And I was so looking forward to things actually making sense
2274031 Have you NOT seen "Putting Your Hoof Down?"
Yeah, about that ... I think you're a little optimistic. And by a little, I mean like the Grand Canyon is just a small crack.