There's something strange and unnatural living in Bon-Bon's house.
Something other than Lyra.
I was hoping Anthropology sequel.
It's a Lyra and Bon-Bon story. I'm happy with that.
Holy buck a new story by JasonTheHuman!
*drops everything, reads immediately*
>JasonTheHuman posts a new story.
>Instant Fave after reading.
A new a JasonTheHuman Lyra fic? I'm in!
EDIT: Well, Bon-Bon fic. But still!
Oh, goody! Just in time for Halloween! Nightmare Night!
I love your description
Looks fun so far!
Lyra's reaction... it is the same as mine to this story! And new episodes of Red Dwarf as well? Could this day get any better!?! No, I think not. It has achieved maximum amounts of awesome possible!
Well Jason, Its pretty good, I like how you still kept lyra's personality from anthropology. Since this is a darkish fic I will be paying close attention. Do not let me down.
>>13875911387591 no first?
Whats this?! Something new by JasonTheHuman? With Lyra and Bon Bon?
Instant like and fav!
>Haunted by a ghost.
>Best Nightmare Night ever.
One of my hands
>>13876761387676 I disagree. I just got Jin-Roh: The Wolf Brigade on DVD. I've surpassed your awesome levels by approximately 41.9347 percent.
I have no idea what that is, therefore it doesn't count. My point stands. Good day sir!
>>13877491387749 Anime. And I think I still win, because I'm currently listening to The Eagles, and nothing is better than them ever.
Suspenseful. I like it
Halloween enters JasonTheHuman makes horror fic with Lyra and Bon bon
(its because of Halloween right?)
THIS HALLOWEEN WILL BE GLORIOUS!
>>13876821387682 I'm not that kind of guy.
Looks pretty promising!
I favourited this as soon as I saw the description.
>>13875911387591 same here but any story with lyra and bon bon is a good story
Faved and liked before i even read it, because i know that dis gon be gud.
I don't really have much to add here... I mostly just feel compelled to do an 'inb4 featured' comment.
I'll have to give the first chapter another look later, when I've got the time to read it... well, properly, I guess. For now I'll just stick with the standard "I like the story, keep doing what you're doing" thing. Oh, and just pretend that I threw in some generic MOAR picture.
Good work, etc... and this reminds me that I still need to drag myself around to reading the second half of Anthropology.
Anthropology's author puts out a story. Insta-fav without even reading it, like a boss.
Alright! I'm glad to be seeing more of your work Jason, you were inactive for a while and I was getting worried that Anthropology had been your one hit wonder.
So far, this fic is pretty damn good! I like how Bon-Bon is ripped from her comfort zone, and into Lyra's! I've also noticed that you have added a lot more detail in your descriptions of settings and actions than in your previous fics. I hope you can keep this one alive and fed, and a word of advice, don't set chapter dates. Don't rush yourself in getting the chapters out, take your time, and give love to the chapters you do complete.
Try to use some more complex sentence structures, and show us the emotions of the characters when they're talking. I noticed a lit in your
past fics, that a lot of the time, the it would be:
"That would be great!" Lyra said.
Try doing this: "That would be great!" Lyra said, her posture relaxing with relief.
One example from the story is when Lyra says she heard something:
Lyra's ears perked up. "Wait. Did you hear that?" She glanced behind her into Bon-Bon's room.
"Hear what?" Bon-Bon said.
This could be changed by adding details like:
Lyra's ears perked up, and her head cocked slightly. "Wait. Did you hear that?" She glanced behind her into Bon-Bon's room.
"Hear what?" Bon-Bon asked, her annoyance towards her tennant showing.
Lyra put a hoof to her lips. "Listen." She whispered, her head lowering slightly in an effort to hear the unknown sound.
It really fleshes the characters out more, and gives us a clear picture of what the they're doing. I hope this fic turns out as good and as well recieved as Anthropology, I know you got a like and a fave from me!
Oh Lyra... didn't you learn anything from Paranormal Activity?
The one who thinks the haunting is cool and makes light of it *always* gets it in the end.
Great to have you back
The Haunting - Testament
>>13879641387964 Well buck, I guess that means I would die then. I can never keep a straight face in serious situations like this.
For that opening alone you get a favorite and a thumbs up. :) The story being good will just be gravy beyond that.
seems kind of like 'a ghost story,' but from Lyra and Bon-Bon's point of view.
No. No first. "First!" comments are for attention whores.
Anyways, like it so far.
Separate rooms? Disappointing...
Otherwise, I'm looking forward to more.
This reminds me of A Ghost Story I once read...
But I can't wait to see what happens! *kicks feet in excitement* Jason, it's good to see ya back.
Should it be ponynormal activity...…
Oh Lyra you silly filly
Im feeling a certain
vibe from this.
I want some more, so I'll Fav and Watch You
Damnit, someone beat me to referencing it.
Mine was going to be "Is it Spooky? o.o"
For some reason I was listening to the dead space theme while reading this. Need MOAR.
Nah, it feels more like the old poltergeist movie, because so far nothing overtly aggressive has happened, just mischievous.
For some reason, I get the feeling that's going to change.
Getting a poltergeist feel just like most everyone here. All that's needed now are chairs stacked on the table and it'll be complete. Only THEN would I want to see their house implore on itself! But I'm getting ahead of myself. It's good to have you writing again Jason. Anthropology was and still is one of my favorite fics. Looking forward to what's in store for this one.
i read this purely based on zee description. i cant say im disappointed.
Intriguing! I like this! More...
A perfect ghost story to get into the Halloween spirit! This is great!
I LOVE Jason the Human's work! Anthropology was excellent, so I have high expectations for this one. no pressure,
Nice to see you writing again!
Saving this for later in the month when I do my holiday readings <3 (yes, I do quirky things like HOLIDAY EVENT READINGS! )
Yep. Like it. Gives me a certain Paranormal Activity feel.
I wonder if it's really a ghost or just some advanced prank for Nightmare Night.
There's something strange and unnatural living in Bon-Bon's house.Something other than Lyra.
This had me rolling on the floor
If I could like a comment,you would get one just for your avatar.
On the subject of the story.
very good.Some nice jump scares present,can't help but feel it would be more impactful as a video,but I'm not going to complain.
It's been a while since something has been able to instill a good fear of the paranormal in me.I will report on my paranormal visions and other such paranoia as the story continues.
Oh, this is going to be hilarious.
I like your Lyra
Anime= I awesome. His point still stands
Well, I agree with you about the Eagles.
>>13916561391656 And what about anime? Do you agree with me about that or are you.... Insert clever anime-related insult here?
Usually it is a good idea to listen to said feelings....
Well, at the time I had my hand stuffed into a bag of popcorn (I need the calories), and seeing as how a buttery keyboard is no fun, I was forced to type with one hand. I could have gotten up to wash my hand to type a 2 minute response, but the effort involved just seemed to great for the reward. Also, I knew it would make people go "wut?" And well...
>>13921911392191 Absolutely None!
Happy we could reach an agreement.
(And that kiddles is how friendship works!)
>>13922431392243 I read your comment in Cheerilee's voice.
Are thou mocking us?
>>13922741392274 No I'm Luna!!
“Oh-hoh? Thou hast grown the stones to strike thy princess and goddess?”
Oh look its a lyra fanfic, I havent seen one of those since,
(I Lliterallyfalloutofmychairscreaming) OMG JasontheHuman!!!
Must read now!!!
It's "thine" dear, not "thy". I know they are near the same thing, must you really keep up this charade?
>>13923121392312 Actually, I copy-pasted that line from Seeing the Pattern 2: Death Take You
Well that just ain't honest, an' if ther' is somethin' Ah don't like, it's dishonesty.
I have seen inb4 being posted all over the web, but I have one question. WTF?
>>13923311392331 and now you're AJ....
Well, no-deeeeee-uuuuuh, of coarse I am Applejack, I just bucking apples, all like POW-POW, take that tree, give me your apples, have you ever bucked an apple tree, cause since I am AJ I make it look soooooo eeeaaasssy, is there anything you make look easy, like falling down stairs, I did that once, it wasn't.... aawwwwww, all my popcorn is gone, I miss it already.
>>13923611392361 Surprise....Shut up...
Thats the meaning of your name....
Its the first time to read a Dark story.
Dont know what it feels like......
If only if Bon Bon knew that humans were real, and that there are over seven billion of them. I for one, say that Lyra is the only sane pony!
Actually, the name was created years ago as an allusion to this, just happened that I later became a fan of MLP: FiM.
>>13876271387627 Really? I instant-faved before reading!
>>13923031392303 You should read ShortSkirtsandExplosions! Soooo... many... Lyra... fics.... (but seriously, he's amazing, especially Background Pony.)
>>13900301390030 I know, that was me too! But then my sister said "Are you really doing a speadsheet on there?", so I kinda shut up.
I am going to read this on halloween... End of story
Lovely to see another story from you and I'm anxious to see more of it. I do wish your Lyra was just a tad more weirded out though and maybe Bon-Bon was the excited one about ghosts just to do a reverse of the normal Lyra/Bon kind of relationship and manias but still looks like this'll be fun. Thanks for sharing! Added to my favorites.
Goddammit Celestia! You moved the cemetery, but you left the bodies! Didn't you?! You left the bodies, and you only moved the headstones! YOU ONLY MOVED THE HEADSTONES!!!! WHY??!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?????!!!!!!!!!
Something other than lyra
Okay reading now
oh this'll be good.
>>13965321396532 why do i have the feeling that i'm gonna feel stupid for not getting this reference?
Way to keep suggesting something had happened only for there to be nothing at all!
Nicely done, found myself looking forward to every line.
Well, folks, strap on your unlicensed nuclear accelerators and call in the local witch doctor, 'cause we've got a ghost to wrangle! Looking forward to more.
It's from Steven Spielberg's 1982 delightful family romp Poltergeist
>>13982341398234 yep i feel stupid for not realizing this awesome reference.
Wow, you must certainly know your paranormal. This story actually resembles some of the things that poltergeists (Or in this case ponygeists,) do! And you wrote in such a correct way! I love it! Liking, and tracking. Please my good sir, carry on.
yay a non shipping bonbon and lyra story must fav now only one question what is the ghost pony or human?
This looks like it's going to be a fun story!
BOOM! 400th LIKE!
Acheivement get!! not firsting!!
here have a Krone
I have a feeling this is gonna be good
This is so awesome, it actually sent shivers down my spine. And in perfect timing for Hallowe- Ehehe, I mean, Nightmare Night. I'm tracking this, without hesitation.