5th grade passed. I spent the summer at home, doing nothing but, you guessed it, writing. I tried to write exciting things, action. As school got closer, my stomach tied faster, and more painfully. The colt I almost became friends with never talked to me after the second day I met him. He forgot I existed, like every other pony outside of my family. I TRIED not to exist soon enough. I felt like just accepting that I'll always be alone. No one to call a friend. No one to have sleep overs with. No one to talk to when I'm down. No one my age I can trust...No one....Not a single pony.
6th grade...Here we go...
We started off with "getting to know each other" activities. I didn't even get up. No one came to ask me any of the questions. I just sat there, as if I was some invisible entity. I can see you, but you can't see me sort of thing. We did roll call, and When I raised my hoof to show I was here, half the class didn't know I was even here. That's typical though.
As the year progressed, I began to get picked on by these older colts. They called me names like weak. Spineless, a pussy. And they threatened to beat me up for no reason. I didn't get it. I hated myself enough. Why do I need them to remind me how worthless I am? That's all there is to say about 6th grade.
7th grade. I was bullied a little bit, but not much. I felt a little better about myself, because people KNEW I existed. When the class was assigned to write poetry, I was always classified as the best poet. The teacher agreed. I didn't say much besides "Thanks" or something simple. I almost refused to make friends at this point. If I'd never had a friend before, why start now? I was fine on my own it seemed.....
8th grade... Here we have torment, and hell... I had to move again. Move schools at least. There was a problem with zoning, so I had to transfer to some other middle school. I hated it.... I was quiet, but still managed to be picked on. The bullying happened again. It got really bad. They beat me up a few times. They tormented me constantly. I was never anything other than dirt to them. In fact, the young mares made fun of me now too. They all hated my guts for what seemed like no reason...I got tired of it. I had to take a long walk. I found a corner of cloudsdale, and I jumped... I closed my eyes, so I wouldn't be tempted to fly by instinct. I passed out from altitude change.
I woke up after somepony saved me...sompeony...saved me? why? I saw a trail of rainbow, fading away as the pony got farther and farther away. I shook off the feeling. I was back on Cloudsdale. Crap.... I couldn't even kill myself....
..........................
The next day of school, I snapped. Some bully made fun of me as always, but I got mad. More than usual. I got infuriated. I quickly turned around and punched him. It was a hard punch. I saw bllodd instantly. He got up, but I bucked him in the face. His nose cracked, and broke. I walked off after that. No one messed with me after that day. I just couldn't take it. When a bottle reaches it's limits, it spills until the capacity is back to normal.
I was finally in 9th grade. The same crap happened from last year...Bully after bully, after bully. I got suicidal again. I went to the corner of Cloudsdale, and tried my luck again. This time, however, I did hit the ground. I could feel it, but I couldn't feel the pain yet. Unfortunately, I was still alive.
I woke up in a hospital. A nurse mare asked how I felt. "Numb..." I replied.
"That will ware off soon." She said. "You're lucky." She continued. "Barely any injuries, but the ones you have will hurt for awhile." That seems unreal. I still can't kill myself.
"No...I'm not lucky. I wanted to die." I said.
"what?..." She asked softly.
"I hate life...I just wanted to end it. I just can't take it, everyone hates me." I looked at the mare..."Where are your wings?" I asked.
"Oh, you're on the ground, silly." I forgot.
"How long has it been?" I asked.
"A couple days." She returned with concern in her voice.
I didn't say anything. Scarlet, and mom are probably worried. "When will I be out of here?" I wanted to see mom, and scarlet.
"Probably by tomorrow." She said. That would have to do.....
........
The day passed by, and I took flight back to Cloudsdale. It wasn't as easy as usual. My body still hurt pretty bad. My wings ached with every flap. Arriving to my house, I took a deep breath, and exhaled. I knocked on the door. Scarlet answered...
"Oh thank Celestia!" She said hugging me with tears. I felt guilty. I would have to tel her everything that happened. My mom came out and held us all in a tight hug. Explaining this would suck. But I had to.
....................
Finishing my story of sadness, was heartbreaking to them. They never looked at me the same way again. It goes to show how much your family doesn't always know about you...
Damn, This hit hard bro.....
FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGS
SO MANY MANLY TEARS!!!!
*Blood
Damn... I know his feelings all too well. I had tried to commit suicide several times because of it. Damnit man! Why do you have to remind me of such this while getting me to want to read more? This is deep man, really deep. I can only assume that this also happened to you as well. I'm going to go cry in my corner now.
So much saddness and emotion that feeling of being all alone, I've been there.
This story is similar to my life, keep writing. You have a gift
This chapter hits home for many a brony, myself included.
this history hurts becose is true... MAGNIFICENT!
Your writing is improving. I can read it now, and dude, it seems like you're writing from personal experience. Is this adapted from stuff you wrote in middle school? I've had that problem before, where writing I thought was deep and amazing in elementary school turned out to seem kind of childish and blunt later, and some of that still showed through when I went to transpose it as part of a larger work.
I'm glad I didn't unfav this earlier, when it was so stilted and structurally confused my brain shut down, because while it might not be the most original idea, it still hits unnervingly close to home in some aspects. This is a good chapter. I'm going to try and read the next one now.