A New Day
A warm, gentle breeze wafted through the air, caressing her soft skin and making her long, beautiful hair sway serenely. She flexed her powerful, sculpted muscles and ruffled the beautiful feathered wings on her back as that warmth seeped into her flesh. The long, green grass beneath her danced under the touch of that wind, tickling her pretty little hooves. She breathed slowly and deeply, taking in the scents of grass, of sweet wildflowers, and of trees that were carried to her nose.
Those sharp eyes of hers slowly pored over her surroundings, taking in the sight of the little meadow she found herself in. She saw the thick, wild grass, and she saw the clusters of bright petals that dotted the landscape, painting it in reds, in blues, in yellows, and in every other color imaginable. Flying amongst those flowers, floating lazily and carefree, she saw little buzzing bees and elegant butterflies helping themselves to their sweet nectar. A short distance ahead of her, she could see the meadow end where a forest of small, friendly trees sprung up from the earth. As she listened, she heard the melodic twittering of birds within those branches, and the scampering of little furry creatures.
She leaned her head back and gazed up at the bright, blue sky above her, looking at the clusters of white, fluffy clouds that slowly drifted over her head. Hanging high above those clouds, shining its soft, soothing light down onto the world below, was a big, beautiful sun.
She had never seen a sun shine so brightly, never felt such a warmth from its kiss. She had never seen a sky so blue, or seen clouds so white. She had never heard such sweet notes, or seen such adorable little insects. She had never seen such colors, such reds, such blues, such yellows and greens. She had never smelled anything so satisfying, never felt anything so perfect, as that which she experienced in that moment.
She sighed a sigh of complete and utter contentment, and her lips came together, stretching into a warm smile. Her eyes slowly fell closed, and she stood there silently, listening to the sweet sound of life.
One of her hooves slowly lifted off of the ground, making its way to her chest. She pressed it firmly against her skin, feeling the steady rhythm of her heart beating deep within her. She felt the warmth that lay within that little heart, the warmth that lay at the core of her being. That warmth spread slowly throughout her entire body, from the crown of her head to the tip of her tail, filling her with its love and its hate, its joy and its sorrow, its grief and its hope. She could feel its sweet caress and its firm embrace as surely as a hoof resting on her shoulder.
She opened her eyes, turned her head to the side, and looked at the one that hoof belonged to.
There was Twilight Sparkle, that dorky little unicorn looking back at her with a smile on her face. Beside her stood Pinkie Pie, and Applejack, and Rarity, and more. There were dozens of them, hundreds of them, countless thousands of them standing there behind her, each one of those faces smiling back at her. She looked the other way and saw the same sight awaiting her there. There stood Fluttershy, and her mother, and her father, and a whole nother host of faces looking back at her. There was Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo. There was Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. There was Lyra, and Bon Bon, and Derpy. There was Spike, and Big McIntosh, and Granny Smith.
And there, standing at her hooves, smiling his wrinkled smile back up at her, was the little green tortoise named Tank.
“Rainbow,” said Twilight. “Are you ready?”
She looked at Twilight, looked at them all, then looked ahead at the beautiful world that lay before her hooves.
“Yeah. It's a new day. Let's make it a good one,” said Rainbow Dash.
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What
11354190
I second that.
Am I missing something? All I feel is confusion right now.
It is well written, but eh . .
I'm entirely unsure of author's message.
Unless everything was written just for that "keep what you love close to heart" monologue.
In which case it's way out of proportion.
So...Was Rainbow dead all along?
That was a very interesting, well written story... That said...
I sadly utterly fail to grasp the ending.
So Rainbow Dash moved on? And then it was a new day?
What exactly had happened to the world is never resolved. Maybe Rainbow Dash had died and refused to "move on" until the end?
But if she had to "move on" from all her friends, the entire world, why then is whatever comes next "a new day" with all that she moved on from?
11317823
Sorry, but I just do not understand it. Perhaps that was the intent, but it somewhat dulls the experience for me. So I fear I strongly fall the second category.
11354319
Yeah, I'm afraid I'm going to have to share this opinion, at least until somebody else points out something I'm just not seeing. I did consider the possibility that everyone else's presence was purely metaphorical, but that presence — particularly, Twilight's — is ascribed too much tactility for me to comfortably process it as anything other than "real". If that was the intent, I feel like it could've been implied in a better way.
I love everything else about this story, but this ending feels obtuse at best and self-defeating at worst, depending on what exactly it's even trying to say. Maybe I'll feel better about it once it's sunk in more, but at this point, I'm struggling with what to make of it. Maybe that's the point, but still.
Som wtf was the ending about. My head hurt trying to figure out what was going on, she nuked herself into the sea?
The story's great, but I gotta admit, I have no idea what happened in the ending, kinda making it feel... hollow? Confusing? It doesn't really feel like an ending, moreso an overly vague cliffhanger or metaphor...
The imagery was great, but like others have said, there’s not really anything in the text that would have pointed us in any certain direction. And while i get that not every story has to say right out loud what it’s about, there at the very least have to be hints of what’s going on, why everyone disappeared, why the representations of her friends were seemingly speaking/thinking for themselves, what the new day thing was about, etc
11317823
Ok, I've let things settle in a bit, so I'll try to give my feedback and (hopefully constructive) criticism (Spoiler tag for obvious reasons).
The story is interesting, gripping and very well written - I wish I could write half as good as you - I really enjoyed reading it... until halfway into the penultimate chapter.
You yourself said that people will either really love the ending or really hate the ending and I sadly find myself in the second category.
The second half end of the penultimate chapter gets confusing and maybe implies that the entire story *might* be a metaphorical (the water rinsing as RD stops "holding on", the entire end of the chapter) or take place in a dream or maybe not because magic, only raising even more questions. But in the end of that chapter, nothing is resolved - neither the core mystery as to what happened, nor what exactly is going on.
Then in the final chapter things become even less clear. RD is suddenly back in a world that seems to "live" again (at least there are animals), but it is all very metaphorical again, because her hoof also belongs to all her friends (she holds them in her heart?). And her tortoise Tank is also here for some reason. Then Twilight speaks to her (but maybe/probably only her inner Twilight, which might be a memory or maybe Twilight is actually a part of her now, who knows), which makes me wonder what all this letting go and moving in the previous chapter on was about, and at this point... I gave up trying to make sense of it...
In the end no questions are answered, no mystery is resolved, and I was left feeling confused, unsatisfied and unhappy (To be honest, at the end of the final chapter I caught myself thinking "Well, even RD exploding into millions of butterflies couldn't make things less clear now"). And I while there are those that enjoy them, I personally am not a fan of such endings.
As I said before - your writing is excellent - and I deeply appreciate the time and effort you freely spent on bringing this to us, even if the ending is an utter miss for me.
Well, you didn't outright say what happened, so it could be a number of things. My thought was that her five friends all died in an accident of some kind and Rainbow was in a grief enduced hallucination in a hospital room. But now it looks more like Rainbow died and was either in a coma, in limbo, or in purgatory and had to leaen to let go before she could enter the afterlife.
Maybe you should have stopped at the end of the last chapter instead if you planned on leaving it open ended, as this little epilogue kinda closes up the possibilites. Ending with Rainbow going through the door and thats it would have been more powerful and thought provoking than "look everypony is there now!" This epilogue, if it wasn't going to reveal anything, kinda ruins the ending.
"Further up and further in" is a C. S. Lewis Chronicles of Narnia reference, and is required to understand this story, I think.
11354534
It's apparently a reference to The Last Battle, itself part of a Biblical allegory. I'm not all that knowledgeable about the books, but I did find this decade-old analysis from a Narnia fan forum:
If the quote's usage here is also meant to be an allusion to Heaven, then it — coupled with Rainbow's journey to the "beautiful world" — could support the "Rainbow Dash died and her friends are trying to help her out of Purgatory" theory that some of the earliest comments were knocking about. That being said, I'm still not sure how she would've died or where it would've happened in this story; besides having a few sugary treats in her system, Rainbow seemed to be in good health when she went to sleep at the start of the story.
Alternatively: before I got to the epilogue, I did wonder if this story would wind up being symbolic of the franchise's transition from G4 to G5; the end of the old world to make way for the new one. Then again, the epilogue kinda gets in the way of that half-baked theory. Either way, the references to Discord and the Elements of Harmony date this fic's events to sometime during Season 2, so it doesn't really work unless the author happens to be of the (nowadays somewhat uncommon) opinion that FiM "died" with Faust's departure.
I'm probably barking up the completely wrong trees, but I am finding trees to bark up!
(Disclaimer: I am VERY out of my depth.)
I really don't understand what happened, feeling really dumb rn lol
Woah, wait a minute. Just, explain the epilogue to me and the rest of us in a blog.
It makes no sense and leaves so many unanswered questions.
Where is she at the end? How did the others get there? Why were they so cool with everything? What did Twilight mean? I mean, there's more, but I'm not gonna raise all the questions at once.
I really liked this story, you did great, sometimes excessive, world building, and you went along with how a pony would handle being alone very well.
I was really looking forward to where this story was going but now I am very confused. The ending doesn't work well with the setup I think, it felt a lot more straight forward with an interesting mystery of what happened to everyone. With no answers and a lot of metaphorical stuff at the end unfortunately I can't say I enjoyed the ending.
definitely could use a blog post breakdown of the story. it was well written, but the build up of said mystery wasn't quite well resolved.
I will be releasing a statement regarding this story as soon as I am able.
Wow... that really hit me hard. Amazing and somber story
My assumption is that the world ended, but since Rainbow was so loyal she got stuck in a sort of other-realm (idk what you'd call it, don't really want to call it purgatory as I doubt Rainbow felt the need to atone for her sins... Moreso just not wanting to give up on friends). Her friends in the afterlife were trying to pull her free, but she was just so loyal that they began to lose hope in freeing her, until she finally caved.
It's the only explanation I can think of where everyone is there to greet her afterwards. The descriptions here stated thousands of ponies. Thus, unless bringing Rainbow back to life required a massive spell with thousands of ponies contributing, my guess is just that the world ended.
... Which could be a whachamacallit for the whole "G4 ending, G5 beginning" thing.
Alternatively, she was stuck in whatever realm for so long that everyone else just died lol.
I found the story to be quite moving and the end chapters made sense to me.
Reflecting on the last two chapters, I didn’t have any preconceived notions of what pony Purgatory and Elysian Fields/Paradise would look like.
I agree with that after her death, Rainbow Dash wakes up in her own personal Purgatory. She has a specific task she has to complete before she can leave and move on. In a reflection of the third act of Our Town by Thornton Wilder, she has to let go of her attachment to her previous life — in this case by internalizing her love for others and giving up trying to return to the Equestria of her past life. This Purgatory is unlike many others in literature because it is a perfect copy but with no living creatures. For me, that makes it interesting. The hints that this world wasn’t quite real we’re numerous: not needing food, not getting injured, breaking the base of Discord’s statue without setting off the protective spells, apples never rotting, the extremely accurate depictions of her friends as hallucinations, etc. The end of the world sequence with everything falling into the endless sea very much harkens to the end of The Last Battle by C. S. Lewis. The horn of destruction thrown over the horizon. The world is back in the state of its beginning and is now ready for a new act of creation.
What do the Elysium Fields look like? Similar to Interstellar, it exists outside of time. All ponies are there at the age she remembers them. All will die eventually and all will simultaneously interact with each other in whatever manner or age works best from each’s perspective.
Okay...?
That certainly was a thing. A thing indeed. We have gone from Langoliers to The Last Battle to something else? Count me among those nonplussed. I feel like I am missing something here
I mean, it’s good symbolism for saying goodbye to G4, and letting go, but I hope there’s an in-universe explanation about this too.
11355328
Let me disagree with you here: She needed food (mentions of canned preserves, her getting hungry, and being very thin in the end), the lack of rot would be an indicator of ALL live vanishing (including the microorganism responsible for rot) etc.
So except for the final two chapters "every living thing vanishing" really appeared the most plausible scenario.
Then the penultimate chapter came and added a big dose "maybe this is not real after all"...
As for the final chapter: I simply dont know anymore. The theme of the previous chapter seemed to be "moving on but keeping them in your heart", but then she talks to Twilight who may or may not be inside her now and her pet Tank is there too, for no obvious reason... If she died and this is her Afterlife why not have all her friends join her instead of just her tortoise; and if it is something else... then where the fuck does Tank come from, and - once again - why is it only the tortoise and no-one else... I'm simply, utterly confused
I have written a commentary on this story that can be found here: https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/995954/regarding-sorry-we-missed-you
11356882
Thank you for the blog post.
It's the shadow realm!
I like many others didn't quite get that the world had ended, but after reading the blog post and remembering what the story started with it makes perfect sense.
Loss is really hard to deal with, and it's hard to let go.
This story reminds me of "Everything is Fine" from many years back...
It's about Fluttershy being the only one alive after a meteor causing everyone to die.
To cope, she ends up doong several things...
Word of caution... the story is abandoned and dead.
This story was equal parts terrifying and heartbreaking, and yet, it has a sense of beauty to it if you look close enough, and I really enjoyed reading through it.
It was fun, sad and memorable to read and I am happy with the ending.
In my opinion, this chapter is a waste, and ruins the mood. And generally is a terrible idea.
Uncertainty on the future beyond is a perfect moment to end it, and having her meet them again just after she finally let go of them, makes the entire story lose it's meaning.
11371438
...And here I was, thinking I read a perfectly clear ending, and understood the story.
Apparently, I'm wrong. After reading author's blogpost, turns out she wasn't actually dead at all! And everything was literal and real.
Excuse me?!...
Are you trying to say here, that end of the world, that is also intelligent, after removing all living things just decided to wait until Rainbow Dash woke up, spent shit ton of time looking all over the world, went mad, finally let go of her friends (which she has no reason to do, since she met them again right after, and no one else needed to do anything like this), and only then end the world, by drowning it, for some reason?!...
What a mess.
Not to mention all the other things that makes sense in context of my understanding, but make little sense in author's view.
Apparently, "Rainbow Dash slept in on the end of the world" must be taken literally.
I recommend changing it to "Rainbow Dash is secretly super special girl, so even Apocalypse will patiently wait for her to be ready before coming".
Honestly, the story is actually much better without last chapter and author's explanation. At least it makes perfect sense this way.
P.S. It's better to write a good, but predictable story, then unique nonsense.
11371438
I kind of agree. I was almost expecting a buddhist lesson about letting go of attachments or something because they will only hurt you. She was really going insane trying to hold on. but that runs contrary to the friendship is magic idea... idk what to make of this and the blog post explaining everything is really quite long
Not to degrade this because it's captivating and good and stuff, but halfway through I sort of stopped caring because there were just too many dramatic turning points if you get what I mean. It took like 9 dramatic turning points for rainbow to realize that there really truly was no one in the world and another 5 for her to let go
Did Rainbow have a stroke?
My thoughts on the story, without having read the commentary.
It was incredibly hard hitting, and a definite tear-jerker. Throughout the entire time I was reading it, there was a part of me that had hoped for some sort of a reversal ending. That the world wasn't ending, and everybody Rainbow loved and cared about would return. But the more I read, and the more I felt that there was real grief written within these words, the more I realized how that would squander an incredible opportunity for a lesson on handling grief and going through the process of mourning.
Too many stories have good endings, and while that is not a bad thing, there are other parts of life that need to be explored, no matter how difficult that may be, and this story did an excellent job at accomplishing that. Some of the greatest stories are written through experience, or even as a method of therapy, and I think this one will be one of the great examples of that process. I already feel that the next time I grieve, I will likely think of this story, and maybe even revisit it. Fantastic job.
Hello! I read and reviewed this story. I also read your commentary on it, so I think it's probably just a case of "didn't quite work for me" -- and that happens sometimes. As I said over there, "I can absolutely imagine that a certain class of reader would lap it up. That class being those who love slow, languid stories where every little experience is described in some detail." I'm just not really in that class, so probably not someone this was going to click with.