"Tired of your life on Equestria? Feel as if there is nowhere new left to explore, nothing left to discover? Then join the Celestial Board as a colonist! We need doctors, engineers, and even toaster repair ponies! Guaranteed work awaits you!
interesting chapter, I would say it's a mix bag on the writing, the first haft part on the ship and sex, with some crew interaction was pretty nice actually, but the escort of the rich mare, despite liking the scene was rather weird after she felt with no time transition after they rescued her, even it it was stated after the fact that it was just ten minutes, and there wasn't more of a disturbed element on the mare or Slimes' part of the fact that she was just raped mostly on the narration side. The Black Jack cameo scene, was rather... underwhelming, I am not against the idea that Slimes' is a descendent of BJ, but I felt that their could have been more of a build up to both revelations, along with quirky moments of BJ somehow finding the the perfects item she need even if she didn't know she needed then and find out it's incredibly useful later one. I would have guessed that BJ store would somehow relocate itself from one planet to another with none of the locals realizes that she came or ever left and just assume she is part of the scenery like everything else for centuries, help it could even be a pocket dimension linked up to different locations and time; Maybe a wierd case of Officer Jenny and Nurse Joy. For the family resemblance I think it would have needed a little work to hint it more like quirks and such.
I finished the bottle of soda, looked around, and found a small tin. I studied it for a moment and opened it. I hadn’t been sure what to expect, but the taste wasn’t terrible. It was certainly off, a little salty, but it did taste like fish of a sort. I looked to find a small package of Auntie Frosted Cakes ever soft/everlast bread. I opened it, took two slices of the bread out, and then put the odd fish on them. Having made a sandwich she ate it in the stillness of the building before looking around.
I'm confused on how blackjack is here but didn't help fixed up the colony or took on the board. I'm not opposed to her being In the story I'm just really confused
interesting chapter, I would say it's a mix bag on the writing, the first haft part on the ship and sex, with some crew interaction was pretty nice actually, but the escort of the rich mare, despite liking the scene was rather weird after she felt with no time transition after they rescued her, even it it was stated after the fact that it was just ten minutes, and there wasn't more of a disturbed element on the mare or Slimes' part of the fact that she was just raped mostly on the narration side. The Black Jack cameo scene, was rather... underwhelming, I am not against the idea that Slimes' is a descendent of BJ, but I felt that their could have been more of a build up to both revelations, along with quirky moments of BJ somehow finding the the perfects item she need even if she didn't know she needed then and find out it's incredibly useful later one. I would have guessed that BJ store would somehow relocate itself from one planet to another with none of the locals realizes that she came or ever left and just assume she is part of the scenery like everything else for centuries, help it could even be a pocket dimension linked up to different locations and time; Maybe a wierd case of Officer Jenny and Nurse Joy. For the family resemblance I think it would have needed a little work to hint it more like quirks and such.
Sorry dude this is just my thoughts
I would say the first haft covered everything
10797314
Thanks. I didn't realize that it said mare and female. I meant for it to be male and female. Was pretty funny though. Fixed though.
Why go from first to third at the end?
I'm confused on how blackjack is here but didn't help fixed up the colony or took on the board. I'm not opposed to her being In the story I'm just really confused