Later that same day, following their run-in with Monsieur Hood and the Merry Men, the group once more set forth for Duloc. Many were still rather in shock over the fact that Princess Fiona single-handedly took down those band of misfits, considering the fact this was the very same princess they were tasked to rescue. However, they also grew more aware of another growing development, something which had been going on during their travels.
The developing feelings between Fiona and Shrek.
The group first came upon a river with seemingly no path across, although clearly shallow enough to walk over. While Twilight Sparkle and her winged friends easily hovered across, Shrek climbed to the top of a tree and used his weight to bend it over and form a bridge. The remainder of the group, along with Fiona, were able to cross with relative ease. During which time, Fiona brushed a hand across Shrek’s back just as she reached the other side. Grinning, Shrek got up while Donkey was still crossing. The sudden whiplash sprung the tree back in place and launched the screaming Donkey in the air. Fortunately, Rainbow Dash zipped behind him and caught the Donkey just before he struck the ground flying him across the river.
“Thanks Dash,” Donkey thanked her.
“Don’t mention it,” Rainbow replied.
Later, while trekking through a field, Shrek and the others were frustratingly swatting away a swarm of flies that had been following them about. Using her wits, Fiona grabbed a nearby spiderweb from a tree branch and raced through the field, swinging it around and ensnaring the little bugs. She soon spun the branch to form a sort of cotton candy treat and handed it to Shrek as a snack. As he walked off biting it, she licked her fingers. All the while, every pony else struggled not to vomit over the disgusting sight.
“Sweet Celestia, how revolting!” Rarity cringed.
“I never thought cotton candy would be so gross,” Pinkie shivered.
“Me neither,” Maddie nodded in agreement.
Shrek soon caught a passing frog and blew it up into a balloon to offer to Fiona. In return, Fiona caught a snake and blew into its mouth, fashioning it into a balloon animal which she presented to Shrek. Soon Fiona started a playful shoving match with Shrek, with the ogre ultimately flinging her into the bushes. She threw a twig at him as they both laughed, releasing their balloons as Donkey leapt after them. The floating balloons in the air had not gone unnoticed by a particularly concerned Pegasus.
“Oh, those poor animals,” Fluttershy spoke worriedly.
Quickly, Fluttershy used her wings to propel herself up to the two floating, and inflated, animals…
<>
High up in the air, for what felt like an eternity, a Duloc knight had been hovering in the air following the events of the tournament (See Doctor Dragon’s commentary). By now, the knight had given up on any hope of coming down and had since remained in place with his arms folded, and his eyes crossed. No longer was he terrified of being so high in the sky, but rather he was downright bored.
All of a sudden, something caught his eyes and propelled him to turn. Two inflated animals, one frog and one snake, were seen floating toward him and he couldn’t help but wonder if this was an illusion or some form of magic. Before he could speak, a yellow winged Pegasus with a pink mane and tail flew toward the animals quickly catching them in her grasp.
“I’m so sorry about this, little creatures,” She apologized.
She soon caught sight of the floating knight, who merely just stared silently at the creature. For a few seconds, there was an awkward silence between the two.
“Hello, sir knight,” Fluttershy squeaked nervously.
“Afternoon…” The knight grunted.
Without a moment’s thought, Fluttershy proceeded to flew her way toward the surface until the knight was left all by himself again. He took a deep breath and released a heavy sigh as he stared toward the wide horizon overhead.
“This is stupid…” The knight grumbled.
<>
Moments later, Fluttershy quickly brought the two animals back toward the ground and proceeded to release the air out of them to the best of her ability. The animals were reasonably stunned by those previous seconds, but otherwise they were unharmed… to some extent.
“There, you’re alright now,” Fluttershy spoke soothingly. “Now you go about your days now.”
Soon, Fluttershy quickly took off to rejoin the remainder of the group all while the two animals just eyed one another and thought to themselves… ‘What just happened?’.
<>
Beyond the boundaries of the forest, there stood the old, abandoned windmill along a small rise. As our heroes broke out of the woods, strolling on without a care, Shrek and Fiona continued their bonding. Soon they were riffing, doing air-guitar, and pretty much acting like a pair of silly school kids. To suggest that Donkey, the Equestrians, and the Ever After girls were baffled by the sight was a gross understatement.
Fiona (Scats):
NYOO NYOO-NYOO
NYAH-NYAH-NYEOW!
Shrek (Scats):
NYOO NYOO-NYOO
NYAH-NYAH-NYEOW!
Fiona & Shrek (Scats):
WOW-YOW WOW-YOW
WOWWIE-YOWWIE-YOW!
Shrek (Scats):
CHUCKA-WONK-WONK
CHUCKA-WONK-WONK!
Fiona (Scats):
WIKKI-WIKKI-WIKKI… ETC…
Eventually, Shrek gave Fiona a brotherly shove, which prompted her to shove him back. He shoved her a slight too hard, and soon she was flying off into some bushes… again.
“You okay?” Twilight called out, concerned.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Fiona laughed.
Seeing her emerge from the bushes, Shrek helped her to her feet. As they stood upon the fields of Duloc, which stretched all the way to Duloc Castle in the distance, for a moment the two were nearly nose-to-nose.
“Yoohoo! We’re here!” Donkey called out.
“What?” Fiona turned her head.
“Oh, wouldja look at that,” Shrek pointed out.
“What is it?” Fiona questioned.
“There… there it is, princess,” Shrek told her. “It’s… it’s Duloc… where your future awaits you.”
“Oh. That’s Duloc?” Fiona asked her.
“It sure is,” Twilight nodded. “Trust me, it’s actually a lotbigger once you get up close.”
“That’s what he said,” Spike snicked off the side.
This caused him to receive a stiff jab in the ribs, courtesy of a rather annoyed Twilight Sparkle.
“Ow!” Spike groaned.
Fiona stood with her arm along Shrek, pondering about her fate. But all of a sudden, Donkey butted in-between them to which they shrugged at each other.
“You know, Shrek thinks Lord Farquaad’s compensating for something,” Donkey spoke his opinion. “Which I think means he has a really…”
Shrek quickly interrupted Donkey with a stomp upon his hoof, causing Donkey to fall over in pain. To which Fiona gave Shrek a suspicious look.
“Oww!”
“Geez, neither of us ever get a laugh,” Spike rubbed his ribs. “I tell you Donkey; this is just ridiculous.”
“You said it,” Donkey winced, slowly getting up.
“Boys…” Raven groaned, rolling her eyes.
“You can say that again,” Apple agreed.
“I didn’t realize we were so close,” Fiona observed.
“No, me either,” Shrek shrugged.
“Well… congratulations to you princess,” Rarity declared. “Your true love awaits.”
“Yes… it does,” Fiona tried to smile.
“I’m just going to need to sit down for a minute,” Spike replied.
“No, no sitting down,” Shrek pulled Spike up. “We need to get the princess to Duloc.”
“Alright—I guess we better move on.”
“Sure…” Fiona nodded, then retracted. “No, wait, Shrek… I, um… well, Shrek? I’m—I’m worried about Donkey.”
“What?” Shrek asked.
“And what am I? Chopped liver?” Spike frowned.
“What are you talking about, Fiona?” Cerise asked.
“I mean, look at him,” Fiona gestured to Donkey. “He, he doesn’t look so good.”
In the eyes of the group, nothing seemed wrong with Donkey apart from perhaps a minor bruise from earlier. However, Shrek smiled knowingly at Fiona as if he knew what she was doing.
“What are you talking about?” Donkey asked confused. “I’m fine.”
Fiona merely knelt beside Donkey, taking his head in her hands.
“Well, that’s what they always say and then… then… then the next thing you know, you’re on your back.”
Donkey merely gave her a skeptical look, which made Fiona dart her eyes back and forth.
“Dead,” Fiona emphasized.
“Aw, come on!” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Don’t you think you’re being a little overdramatic?”
“You know, she’s right,” Shrek played along. “You look awful. Do you want to sit down?”
“Uh, you know, I’ll make you some tea,” Fiona added.
“I’ll take that tea!” Spike called out.
“I didn’t want to say nothin’, but I got this twinge in my neck,” Donkey admitted. “And when I turn my head like this, look.”
Donkey sharply leaned his head to the side, letting off a loud crack.
“Ow! See?”
Hearing that awful cracking sound, everyone cringed.
“Sweet Celestia, Donkey,” Rarity cringed. “I truly wish you wouldn’t do that. It is so unbelievably gross, not to mention uncouth.”
“Hmm… déjà vu!” Pinkie nodded.
“That sounds worse than the time Ah heard Big Mac and Sugar Belle getting’ busy in the barn,” Applejack added.
This caused Rainbow to turn skeptically toward her marefriend.
“You heard that?” She asked in disgust.
“Well, they weren’t bein’ mighty discreet,” Applejack responded. “They sounded like two grizzly bears fightin’ over salmon.”
“Okay, I really didn’t need that image in my head.”
It was then Twilight noticed Shrek and Fiona giving each other happy looks, as if confirming they’d made up an excuse to stall for time.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Twilight asked curiously. “I thought you wanted to get to Duloc sooner.”
“Well, I was just thinking…” Fiona admitted. “Maybe Duloc could wait until morning?”
“Morning?” Shrek asked curiously.
“Why not? I’ve spent my whole life without true love. What’s one more night?”
“Alright, who’s hungry? I’ll find us some dinner.”
“I’ll get the firewood.”
Shrek and Fiona tried to head off, but of course walked straight into each other.
“Oops/Sorry!” Shrek and Fiona apologized.
“Were you gonna--?” Shrek gestured.
“That’s fine,” Fiona brushed off.
“I’ll go the other—”
“Okay.”
“You wanna go around/Should we just—”
“Go together?”
“Sure.”
Eventually, Shrek and Fiona walked off together, leaving Donkey and the rest of the group sitting there.
“Hey, where you goin’?” Donkey asked in panic. “Oh, man, I can’t feel my toes!”
“Donkey, it’s kind of hard for you not to feel what you’ve never had,” Rainbow pointed out.
Donkey looked down and began flailing his hooves.
“I don’t have any toes!” He panicked. “I think I need a hug.”
It was then Fluttershy and Apple approached Donkey from both sides. The girls quickly wrapped their arms around him, trying their best to calm him down.
“Just do us a favor, Donkey,” Apple advised. “Take deep breaths.”
“Everything is alright,” Fluttershy said soothingly.
After a moment or two of deep breathing exercises, Donkey eventually calmed down smiling toward the two girls as they pulled away.
“Thanks girls, I needed that,” He said gratefully.
“No problem at all,” Apple replied. “What are friends for?”
“They’ll be there for you whenever you need them,” Fluttershy nodded. “Always having your back, no matter what happens along the way.”
Spike sighed to himself as he sat upon the grass. All of a sudden, he felt something massage soothingly against his ribs and he started feeling better. He turned to the side and addressed Twilight Sparkle, who massaged against the sore spot on his brother figure’s side with a caring, and slightly apologetic, look on her face.
“Sorry about that…” Twilight apologized softly.
“Nah, it’s cool,” Spike replied casually. “Just fooling around. No biggie.”
Off to the sides, watching over the rest of her friends, a guilty look spread upon Maddie’s face. She had heard Fluttershy and Apple’s words from earlier. So many thoughts started forming through her twisted head. But unlike most of her thoughts, these were neither silly nor funny.
‘Friends will always be there for you,’ Maddie thought. ‘If they knew the truth, they probably wouldn’t be.’
<>
After some time, the sun had finally begun to set over the horizon overlooking Duloc. Shrek had since built a fire, which he used to cook a dish on a spit. Some of the group sat along with them, just idly chatting while Fiona ate. A certain pink party pony and a Donkey were spying off to the side. Pinkie’s hooves were held over her eyes as if pretending she were looking through binoculars.
“Donkey my boy, there’s definitely something going on around here,” Pinkie observed. “I’ve been watchin’, and the signals are clear.”
“Yeah, that nervous laugh when she brushes his skin,” Donkey pointed out. ‘The sweaty palms, the big dopey grin.”
“Hmmm-hmm-mmm…” Pinkie and Donkey stroke their chins.
“Just a giggle and a flip of her hair, and I can smell the pheromones in the air!” Pinkie observed, taking a deep sniff. “Yep… I know that one very well.”
“Makin’ goo-goo eyes over their food,” Donkey added. “They’re settin’ the mood and they’re not even realizing it.”
“Whomever doesn’t believe love is blind, clearly haven’t met some friends who think otherwise. I’m telling you Donkey, some pony’s got to turn up that heat, butter the pan, and not be so scared silly about it.”
“He’s just got to reach for her hand, maybe give her a kiss. See Pinkie? She’s just waitin’ for a move to be made.”
“They just got to switch into gear, gotta buckle down and give it a whirl! The scene’s set right out of a book with a sunset, a beautiful girl, lying naked together on the beach…”
“Uh… Pinkie?” Donkey eyed Pinkie uncomfortably.
“Oh, sorry!” Pinkie snapped out of her fantasy. “I just got caught up in the magic of the night! The fireflies… uh, forget it.”
While the two were talking amongst themselves from a distance, dinner went on without a hitch. If one would even call this ‘dinner’ at least.
“Mmm… this is good!” Fiona spoke between bites. “This is really good. What is this?”
“Uh, weed rat,” Shrek replied, taking another spit off the fire. “Rotisserie style.”
“No kidding!” Fiona said surprised. “Well, this is delicious.”
“Well, they’re also great in stews,” Shrek informed her, sitting beside her. “Now, I don’t mean to brag, but I make a mean weed rat stew.”
The ogre turned and noticed that the majority of the group had ‘obviously’ overheard what he just cooked up. The sickly green color upon their faces was a dead giveaway.
“Hey girls, take a bit of weed rat!” He called out. “You’ll love it!”
“Wha—Ooh, er, perhaps not Shrek,” Rarity gagged.
“I must agree with Rarity on this one,” Twilight groaned, trying not to vomit.
Poor Fluttershy merely trembled at the very thought of those poor rats and the manner of which they were cooked up. All the while Applejack tried her best to console her, briefly looking around.
“Where’s Spike?” Applejack asked.
“Don’t tell me he actually ate the weed rat,” Rainbow groaned.
To which Fiona turned over and shook her head.
“Oh no!” She replied casually. “He took only one bite, and he suddenly went away to wash the taste out of his mouth.”
She gestured with a thumb to the side and all eyes turned toward Spike, who screamed loudly as he knelt by a nearby pond. He furiously scrubbed his tongue with a toothbrush like there was no tomorrow.
“SO HORRIBLE!” He yelled loudly.
“I’ve had my fair share of meat in my life,” Cerise said, holding her hand over her mouth. “But that just ruined meat for me entirely.”
“This is exactly why I insist on being vegetarian,” Ashlynn nodded.
To which Fiona smiled in response. However, it quickly faded the moment her eyes caught sight of Duloc over the distance.
“I guess I’ll be dining a little differently tomorrow night,” She spoke sadly.
Shrek merely gave a small nod, as the smile disappeared from his own face. But the smile quickly returned the moment an idea popped in his head.
“Maybe you can come visit me in the swamp sometime,” He suggested. “I’ll cook all kinds of stuff for you – Swamp Toad soup, Fish Eye tartare – you name it. I’ll even make a batch of S’nothers.”
“S’nothers?” Fiona asked curiously.
“They’re traditional ogre campfire snacks. A little bit like S’mores but instead of marshmallow and chocolate, we use squirrel gizzards and mulch. Oh, they just melt in your mouth!”
“They sound delicious.”
“And a little nutty.”
After hearing all that, a few of the girls raced toward the nearby bushes and actually started vomiting over the mere thought. Somehow, the others managed to keep it down.
“Honestly Shrek, are you trying to ruin food for all of us forever?” Briar asked bitterly.
“I don’t think it’s that bad,” Maddie smiled. “In Wonderland, we have all sorts of bizarre cuisine.”
“Maddie, most of them only make you grow or shrink,” Raven told her friend. “At least they still taste good.”
“Good point,” Maddie nodded.
Fiona now intently looked at Shrek, smiling.
“Hmmm, I’d like that,” She replied to Shrek.
“Really?!” The group raised their brows.
“Well, I may not get another chance to try one of those S’nothers…” Fiona replied.
“You eat one and you may not get a chance to do ANYTHING!” Spike called out.
And yet, through all of that, Shrek was in the process of slurping down a rat’s tail and gave a laugh. For a moment, they gazed into each other’s eyes longingly for a few moments or two.
“Um… princess?” Shrek asked nervously.
“Yes… Shrek?” Fiona replied with a smile.
“I, um—well, I was… I was wondering—I was wondering—are you…”
Shrek realized he was starting to fumble over his words like a big idiot. With a heavy sigh, he pointed to the rat on her hand.
“Are you gonna eat that?” He asked casually.
Fiona, expecting a different question, removed the weed rat from the spit while Shrek sat annoyed by the words refusing to come out. As Fiona handed the rat to Shrek, he grabbed onto her hand. The two slowly leaned toward each other… until Donkey, Pinkie, andMaddie popped between them, interrupting the moment.
“Man, isn’t this romantic?” Donkey asked.
“Such a Kodak moment,” Pinkie nodded, wiping a tear off her eye.
“As sweet as Earle Gray,” Maddie smiled.
“What’s tea got to do with this?” Pinkie asked confused.
“Oh no, I mean my pet mouse, Earle Gray,” Maddie explained. “I’ll show you.”
Maddie reached out her hand and a tiny little gray mouse emerged from her sleeve, smiling toward Pinkie Pie with a tiny squeak.
“Aww, he’s really cute!” Pinkie sighed adoringly.
“You can say that again,” Donkey nodded, looking toward the setting sun. “Just look at that sunset.”
Fiona’s mood quickly changed, and she sat up abruptly to face the sunset.
“Sunset?!” She panicked. “Oh my gosh! Sunset! Oh no!! I mean… it’s late. I-It’s very late.”
She quickly began to back up toward the mill, looking toward the sunset with deep concern. Shrek and the others merely followed her glance.
“What?” Shrek asked confused.
“What’s wrong, Fiona?” Twilight asked worriedly. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I-I-It’s nothing, Twilight,” Fiona responded nervously. “Really, it’s nothing.”
“Wait a minute,” Donkey said skeptically. “I see what’s goin’ on here.”
Fiona turned toward Donkey, frozen in panic.
“You’re afraid of the dark, aren’t you?”
“Yes!” Fiona quickly replied. “Yes, that’s it. I’m terrified. You know, I’d better go inside.”
She smiled as she turned to walk up the windmill’s steps, breathing a sigh of relief.
“Don’t feel bad, Princess,” Donkey assured her. “I used to be afraid of the dark, too, until – Hey, no wait. I’m still afraid of the dark!”
Shrek groaned, while Fiona chuckled as Donkey looked around visibly spooked. Soon she was making her way to the door leading inside the windmill, ready to call it a day.
“Good night,” She said to the group.
“Good night,” Shrek respondd.
“Sleep well, Fiona!” Twilight added.
“And don’t let the bed bugs bite!” Pinkiy smiled giddily. “I’m serious about them bed bugs; they’ll creep up on you!”
Fiona went inside the windmill, giving on final look to Shrek before closing the door behind her. Shrek looked over to Donkey, who now looked at him with a knowing eye. Rainbow Dash quickly floated alongside him, giving Shrek a look.
“What?” Shrek asked.
“Ohh! Now I really see what’s goin’ on here,” Donkey said suggestively.
“Any pony with eyes can see what’s going on here, Shrek,” Rainbow smirked. “After all, you’re not exactly being discreet. And we did not come this whole way, puttin’ up with you and your body oder, just so you can let her walk away like that!”
“What’re you talking about?” Shrek asked.
Donkey trotted over to Shrek as he knelt by the fire, fiddling with one of the spits.
“I don’t even wanna hear it,” Donkey replied. “Look, I’m an animal, and I got instincts, and I know you two were obviously digging on each other. I could feel it.”
“We’ve seen it ever since we left the cliff side the other day,” Rainbow nodded. “You’ve changed, you both have.:
“Oh, you’re crazy,” Shrek shrugged. “I’m just bringing her back to Farquaad.”
“Oh, come on, Shrek!” Donkey rolled his eyes. “Wake up and smell the pheromones. Just go on in and tell her how you feel.”
At that point, the remainder of the group approached and found themselves involved in this conversation.
“I really must agree with Donkey on this matter, Shrek,” Rarity added. “It’s clear the two of you formed quite a connection in such a short amount of time.”
“You two obviously share so many similarities and the same interests,” Fluttershy nodded.
“You’re all crazy!” Shrek brushed off.
It was then Ashlynn stepped up before the rest of the group until she stood alongside the ogre.
“Take it from someone who’s had and lost love, Shrek,” She spoke sincerely. “When someone comes along and you truly feel a connection with them, you need to take that opportunity while you have it. Because one day, the person you care about could be gone forever and then you’ll be left wondering what might have been. My advice to you is to tell Fiona how you feel.”
Shrek merely groaned in annoyance as he stood up and turned toward the young princess.
“I—there’s nothing to tell!” He answered in irritation. “Besides, even if I did tell her that, well, you know – and I’m not saying I do, ‘cause I don’t – she’s a princess and I’m…”
“An ogre?” Twilight and Donkey said in unison.
“Yeah…” Shrek replied bitterly. “An ogre.”
Shrek tossed the spit aside and trudged away.
“You’re lyin’ to yourself sayin’ you don’t have any feelings for her at all, Shrek!” Applejack called out. “She needs to know.”
“Where you goin’?” Donkey asked.
“To get… more firewood,” Shrek replied.
Donkey and Pinkie Pie turned suspiciously over at the large pile of firewood already piled up. The rest looked on knowing that at this point Shrek ‘did’ need more wood… before the fire began to die.
Shrek himself sat upon the hill, where he could be alone to his thoughts as he gazed toward Duloc until night crept along the sky. It wasn’t until Shrek heard footsteps approaching behind him that he finally turned to see Twilight Sparkle, Spike, and the Ever After girls approaching. A sigh escaped his lips as he turned back around.
“If you’ve all come to convince me to talk to Fiona, yer wasting yer breath,” He sighed.
“That’s not why we’re here,” Twilight replied. “In fact, we figured we’d enjoy the view. This place does have its ups and downs, but you cannot deny the beauty when you take a good look.”
“Where’re the rest of your friends?” Shrek asked.
“They decided to take a walk with Donkey,” Twilight replied. “They won’t be gone long.”
Soon, the purple pony princess, her dragon assistant, and the six teenage girls sat alongside Shrek. For a while, they did nothing but look out toward the night. The stars glittering along a dark canvas and the moon shining ever so brightly.
“Twilight is right, it is a beautiful night,” Cerise said honestly. “Whenever I see the full moon up above, it always gives me peace of mind.”
“I agree,” Raven nodded. “It’s the perfect atmosphere for thinking.”
“Especially about things weighing heavily on your mind,” Briar added.
“Alright, I’m leaving,” Shrek spoke quickly, getting up.
“Whoa, hold up Shrek!” Twilight said urgently. “We’re not here to tell you to do anything; we’re just talking.”
Shrek really wanted nothing more than to just walk off and act like nothing was wrong. To have that sense of normalcy he had before these strangers came into his life. However, he found himself slowly sitting back down with the group with a skeptical gaze upon his face.
“Alright… talk,” He sighed.
“Shrek, there’s no use denying you clearly have feelings for Fiona,” Apple stated.
“For the hundredth time, no I don’t!” Shrek responded loudly.
“Who are you trying to convince, Shrek?” Twilight asked. “Us? Or yourself?”
Shrek took a deep breath and it appeared he was about to throw an angry response as usual. But then, once that breath eventually emerged, all he could really do was sigh to himself.
“Look, let’s say I did have feelings for Fiona,” He spoke hypothetically. “It wouldn’t matter anyway. I’m supposed to deliver her to Farquaad tomorrow anyway, I’ll get my swamp back, you and that fairy tale lot can have your freedom, and none of what happened today will even matter. Besides, there’s no way she’d ever love a big, stupid, ugly ogre.”
Twilight reached up and placed a hoof on Shrek’s arm, offering comfort. Shrek looked over at her, confused over the gesture but embraced it all the same.
“Shrek, you’re not a big, stupid, ugly ogre,” She spoke honestly. “You’ve just thought that way for so long you’ve actually believed it. You think the idea of your ideal swamp is the most you can ever have, but the truth is… I don’t think that’s what you really want.”
“Twilight’s right, Shrek,” Spike spoke up. “I know you don’t believe in true love right now. But if you did, we just want you to know we’re in your corner, buddy. Speaking from experience, you have to tell this girl what you’re really feeling deep down. If you don’t, you’ll never get another chance… and she’ll move on without you. Any reason you have to say otherwise will mean nothing. Just look into your heart… and you’ll find the answer.”
Shrek sat silently, pondering over his options. Finally, he stood up and walked off passing the group. They watched as he pressed onward down the hill, to get something – like a man on a mission. They all sat in that spot, watching proudly as they hoped to see that the ogre was finally about to make his move.
<>
Later that evening, Donkey and the other Equestrians had just come back from their nightly stroll. They still felt down over the fact that they couldn’t convince Shrek to share his feelings with Fiona, and hoped the others stood a better chance than they did. Not knowing how long it was going to take, they decided it was all up to them at this point. And so it seemed to be as they made their way to the door of the windmill with Pinkie Pie knocking on the door.
“Fiona? It’s your friendly neighbor Pinkie Pie!” Pinkie called out. “I know you don’t like to be bothered at this hour, but we really need to talk to you.”
Pinkie Pie waited for a moment, while the rest waited with anticipation. But not a response was heard, not even the slightest stir. So Pinkie knocked four times in rapid session on the door once more. Without waiting, she knocked again… and again… but just as she went for another set of four, the door swung open in an eerily fashion.
“That’s not ominous at all,” Rainbow remarked sarcastically.
Fluttershy shivered at the sight of the darkness, as Applejack and Rarity stood by her side. With Donkey at the lead, they stepped through the open doorway and into the windmill itself. Due to its state of abandonment, everywhere they looked there were cobwebs hanging over the shadows of the windmill and fallen beams in every corner. The interior itself was deathly still and the princess was nowhere in sight. The ponies proceeded to follow Donkey with extreme caution.
“Sheesh, what a dump!” Pinkie Pie remarked.
“This place could use a bit of sprucing up, I must add,” Rarity cringed, looking around.
“Princess? Princess Fiona?” Rainbow called out. “Are you in here?”
“Princess, where are you?” Donkey called out.
All at once, a group of birds flocked to the top of the open roof, starting Donkey and the others. Taking a deep breath, they pressed on with their eyes facing the darkness ahead.
“Princess?” Applejack called out.
“Your Highness?” Rarity came in.
Unbeknownst to the group, they were so concerned over what laid ahead of them, they failed to notice a hand gripping the rungs of a ladder.
“Fiona, it’s very spooky in here!” Fluttershy piped up nervously. “I really don’t want to play games; please come out!”
“It’s okay Fluttershy, Auntie Pinkie Pie has just the remedy,” Pinkie Pie smiled. “When things get scary, just do what I do!”
“Pinkie darling, please… don’t!” Rarity groaned.
“Don’t do what?” Donkey asked, confused.
Pinkie Pie (Sings):
When I was a little filly,
And the sun was going DOWWNNNAAAAHHHH!!!
In a matter of seconds, everything happened at once. Pinkie Pie was starting to sing while Fiona looked down toward Donkey and the other ponies cloaked in shadow. She tried to sneak away, from up above on the platform. Next thing she knew, the wooden plank broke and she fell down with a crash interrupting Pinkie’s song before it began. She landed on the flour with a scream, which in turn launched a cloud of flour into the air and completely covering the ponies.
“BAAAH—CHOO!!!” Pinkie sneezed.
“Bless you!” Rarity and Fiona spoke in unison.
Rarity gasped upon the sudden realization, and the group froze.
“Who… said that?” Donkey asked slowly.
Slowly, they turned their heads toward the darkness yet found themselves unable to tell who the figure was. But from what they could tell, it was so huge they towered over the Equines. Pinkie Pie started to shiver in panic, while Rarity stood completely silent and watched from the shadows all while the eyes of her friends went wide.
“AAAHH!!!” Donkey and the ponies screamed.
“IT’S A SCARY MONSTER!” Pinkie panicked. “EVERY PONY RUN!!!”
Pinkie Pie started running head over heels, even up along the walls, trying to stay as clear from the mysterious monster in the dark. While every pony else screamed with fright, the monster approached with its arms up.
“No, no!”
“No, help!” Donkey cried out.
“Please don’t eat us!” Fluttershy begged tearfully. “I beg of you! Please!”
“I taste like Brussel Sprouts!” Pinkie screamed, mid-run. “Honest! Ask any pony!”
“Shh!”
Soon the creature emerged from the cloud of flour, an ogress. The beast approached Donkey and the girls as Applejack and Rainbow Dash stood their ground in front of the frightened group.
“Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!” Donkey called out.
“Twilight! Spike! Anyone!” Fluttershy cried out.
“No, it’s okay! It’s okay!” The ogress assured.
“Stand back! I’m warnin’ ya!” Applejack warned, stomping her hoof. “Don’t come no closer now!”
“Yeah, what have you don’t to the princess?!” Rainbow threatened. “If you harmed her, I oughtta!”
“Rainbow, shh! I’m the princess!”
“A likely story!” Pinkie screamed. “HELP!!!!”
“MOMMY!!!” Donkey cried out.
“It’s me, in this body,” The ogress spoke softly.
“Wait…” Rarity peered, noticing the similarities. “That voice… the dress…”
“Oh my God! You ate the princess!!!” Donkey panicked.
“Princess Fiona, can you hear me?” Pinkie called to the ogress’s stomach. “It’s me! Pinkie!”
“Pinkie!” The ogress groaned.
“Don’t panic! Listen, just keep breathing! I’ll get you out of there!”
“Pinkie! No!”
But Pinkie Pie was beyond listening at this point. She proceeded to thrust her hoof into her mane trying to find something that could free Fiona out of her predicament. She took out a glass slipper, a skull-shaped apple, a spinning wheel, a paper lantern, a saucy picture of Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich… which she put back in her mane, and a whole bunch of baking tools that weren’t even close to what she needed.
“Where’s a good scalpel when you need one?!” Pinkie squealed.
“Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!” Donkey shouted repeatedly.
“Twilight! Raven! Cerise!” Pinkie called out.
The ogress, claiming to be Fiona, covered Donkey’s mouth while Rarity used her magic to literally zip Pinkie’s mouth shut.
“Will you two quiet down and LISTEN!” Rarity yelled.
“This… is… me!” The ogress insisted.
“Fiona?” Pinkie muffled.
Donkey, along with the rest of the ponies, looked deep into her eyes. As the ogress pet the Donkey’s muzzle, calming him down, every pony was able to get a good look at her. Indeed the dress she wore was similar to Fiona’s choice of gown and the voice along was recognizable. But the eyes and her hair… they also matched Fiona’s. They all looked surprised and confused, so much that Pinkie Pie took out some reading glasses (Rarity’s) from her mane just to get a good look.
“Fiona?” The ponies, minus Rarity, spoke in unison.
“Princess…?” Donkey realized. “What happened to you?”
“Yeah… you’re, uh… uh… eh…” Pinkie fumbled her words.
“Different?” Fluttershy finished nervously.
“I’m ugly, okay?” Fiona spoke in frustration.
“No… no…!” Rainbow Dash shook furiously. “I mean, maybe… no… no, you’re not.”
“Wut happened to ya, yer highness?” Applejack asked calmly.
“Was it something you ate?” Donkey guessed. “’Cause I told Shrek those rats were a bad idea. You are what you eat, I said. Now—”
“Donkey! You aren’t helping!” Rarity scolded.
“No! I—I’ve been this way as long as I can remember,” Fiona explained.
“What do you mean?” Donkey asked curiously. “Look, I ain’t never seen you like this before.”
“Neither have we,” Rainbow jumped in. “What is this? Some kind of secret super power or something?”
“It only happens when the sun goes down,” Fiona answered.
“So… it is a super power!” Rainbow smiled. “Now that’s awesome!”
“Hun, please!” Applejack scolded. “Let her talk.”
“Good Heavens Fiona, what happened?” Rarity asked.
Fiona leaned over a barrel filled with water, gazing upon her reflection. She found only the ogress staring back at her, and not the beauty she truly wanted to see.
“’By night one way, by day another—this shall be the norm,’” Fiona recited. “’Until you find true love’s first kiss and then take love’s true form.’”
“Aww, that’s beautiful,” Donkey smiled. “We didn’t know you wrote poety.”
“That’s not poetry, Donkey dear,” Rarity shook her head. “It’s… it’s a spell, isn’t it?”
“It’s a curse!” Fiona sighed. “When I was a little girl, a witch cast a spell on me.”
“A… a witch?” Fluttershy spoke nervously.
“Yes. So now every night when the sun goes down I become this… this horrible, ugly beast!”
Fiona smacked her reflection in the water, splashing it onto Donkey and Pinkie who shook it off like a pair of hounds.
“Oh darling, that’s awful!” Rarity spoke sadly. “I can’t imagine any creature doing something so cruel to a child.”
“Hold up! You said the person who cursed you was a witch right?” Pinkie asked curiously. “Was it a green witch? Did she have a pointy hat and wore black robes? Riding around on a broomstick, cackling with a raspy voice, and threatened to hurt your dog? That is, if you had one—”
“I don’t really know,” Fiona answered sadly. “I was too young to remember; I only know because my parents told me that’s how it happened. I was since placed in a tower to await the day my true love would rescue me. That’s why I have to marry Lord Farquaad tomorrow before the sun sets and he sees me… like this.”
Fiona held her head and started to cry. Pinkie Pie proceeded to take out a box of tissues as Rarity levitated one toward Fiona.
“There, there… it’s going to be okay,” Rarity soothed gently. “I’m sure we can fix this somehow.”
“All right, all right, calm down,” Donkey spoke up. “Look, it’s not that bad. You’re not that ugly.”
“Yeah, it’s fine!” Pinkie brushed off. “We’ve seen wayworse!”
“Pinkie!!!” The ponies groaned.
Fiona merely looked up for only a few seconds. No matter how they looked at it, they couldn’t ignore where Fiona was coming from.
“Okay, I can’t tell a lie,” Applejack sighed. “You are ugly, but you only look like this at night.”
“No arguments there,” Pinkie nodded.
“Yeah, Shrek’s ugly twenty-four seven,” Rainbow added, then realized. “Wait a second! This is perfect!”
“Perfect?!” Fiona remarked. “Rainbow Dash, I’m a princess and this is not how a princess is meant to look. If Lord Farquaad finds out I look like this, he’ll never marry me!”
“Your Highness, I understand this is quite tragic,” Rarity spoke up. “But never, ever, ever say that to yourself. Any creature, including you, are still beautiful in some way. It’s not about how you appear on the outside; it’s what’s on the inside that counts. That’s the Fiona you truly are, and we’ve seen it in the short time we’ve been together.
“Look, we’ve been talking about this all afternoon and we all agreed… would it really be so terrible if you decided not to marry Farquaad?”
“It’s not a bad idea!” Fluttershy piped up shyly.
“I have to kiss my true love!” Fiona argued. “The kiss is the only thing that will break the spell and make me beautiful.”
“I’m with my friends on this one,” Pinkie Pie popped up. “Speaking as a pony who found true love, what if neither you nor him are meant to be? And even if he does marry you, it would only be out of duty and not of the romantic lovely heart-shaped candy stuff. You’d never get to spend a night sharing a bed because you won’t stand the sight of one another, and you’ll never share a talk without coming off as awkward. Honestly, I think you’d be better off with someone else!”
“Who?” Fiona asked sadly.
“Well, you know, um… you’re kind of an ogre,” Donkey pointed out. “And Shrek… well… you got a lot in common.”
“Shrek…” Fiona lifted her head.
“Sure! He’s really not so bad once you get to know him,” Rarity nodded in approval. “Of course, he can be cranky, moody, and grumpy… not to mention rude, crude, and… no respect for personal hygiene. But it’s clear you both formed quite a connection. And whether you know it or not, the only reason Shrek is being nicer than he was when we met him… is all because of you. He’d never have been so open about himself if it weren’t for rescuing you.
“The least you can do is talk to him about it. What do you think it would cost?”
<>
Speaking of Shrek, as all that was going on, the ogre himself was approaching the windmill as Twilight, Spike, and the Ever After girls followed closely behind him. In his hand, he held a sunflower and during his brief walk he had been rehearsing to himself.
During the song, Shrek felt a claw upon his shoulder and turned to the side. Spike stood beside him, smiling with understanding knowing just what he was going through. And he knew then just how to help the ogre.
“You’re going to be perfect, Shrek,” Ashlynn smiled.
“You got this big guy!” Cerise gave a thumbs up.
“Fiona will love the flower,” Twilight assured. “I promise.”
“Okay… here we go,” Shrek nodded.
“Go for it!” Spike nodded.
With his mind made up, Shrek approached the windmill as the group looked on with anticipation. He stopped at the foot of the door and lifted his free hand to knock. But then, he suddenly overheard Fiona talking with Donkey and the other Equines. He leaned towards the door to hear what they were saying.
“I can’t think about Shrek. Not now,” Fiona explained. “I’m a princess after all; I can’t just marry whoever I want.”
“Who says you can’t?” Rainbow asked. “That’s a stupid rule if you ask me.”
“Rainbow… please!” Applejack hissed. “Fiona… why are you so against the idea?”
“Take a good look at me, Applejack!” Fiona demanded.
“But we are looking!” Pinkie insisted.
“I mean really… who could ever love a beast so hideous and ugly? ‘Princess’ and ‘ugly’ don’t go together. That’s why I can’t stay here with Shrek.”
Shrek stepped back in shock, misinterpreting the conversation’s meaning. But from how he heard it, she was talking about him. She was referring to the ridiculous nature of a princess as beautiful as Fiona wanting anything to do with a beast as hideous as him. That all the comradery they had together, all the fun times they shared, and the meals they had, a whole day of traveling, talking, and laughing… all that meant nothing to her at all.
“Are you sure there’s not even just one teeny, tiny chance for Shrek?” Fluttershy asked softly.
“My only chance to live happily ever after is to marry my true love,” Fiona clarified. “Don’t you see, everyone? That’s just how it has to be.”
Shrek heaved with a deep sigh, thrust the flower upon the foot of the door, and stormed away. Twilight, Spike, and the Ever After girls saw Shrek approaching them so angrily huffing the air so violently.
“Shrek, what happened?” Apple asked concerned.
“What did she say?” Twilight asked additionally.
“Go away…” Shrek muttered, walking ahead.
“Shrek, wait a minute!” Spike called out, following him. “Look, did she say anything? I’m sorry if whatever she said hurt you… I know what it's like to feel rejected when a girl doesn't love you back… but maybe if we can talk about it—”
“WILL YOU JUST DROP IT ALREADY?!” Shrek snapped at Spike. “YOU’RE A DRAGON! WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT LOVE?! Why don’t you just go back to your mamby-pamby pony friends and get out of my life!!!”
Spike stood frozen in shock as Shrek stormed off in a huff down the hill and into the dark toward the castle. Spike could feel tears struggling to leak out as Twilight and the girls gathered around him, comforting the young teenage dragon. And all the while, as Spike just stood there hurt and betrayed, Twilight turned back toward the windmill wondering just what happened.
<>
Meanwhile, inside the windmill…
“It’s the only way to break the spell,” Fiona concluded.
“Well, you at least gotta tell Shrek the truth,” Donkey advised.
“If he knew all this, I think maybe—” Fluttershy offered.
“No, he can’t know!” Fiona objected. “And you can’t tell him! You can’t breathe a word. No one must ever know.”
“What’s the point of being able to talk if you gotta keep secrets?” Pinkie whined. “Believe me, I tried… it’s not as funny as it looks!”
“Honestly Fiona, ya can’t keep something this big a secret forever,” Applejack warned. “Sooner or later, our friends are bound tah find out.”
“Promise you won’t tell. Promise!” Fiona begged.
“All right, all right, I won’t tell him,” Donkey sighed.
“But you should,” Pinkie advised. “We shouldn’t have to do the telling. If any pony’s going to tell Shrek the truth, it’s you. One way or another, Shrek will find out. If you still want to at least be friends with him, you have to Pinkie Promise that you’ll tell him when the time is right.”
To say that Princess Fiona was confused over her words was an understatement.
“What’s a Pinkie Promise?” Fiona asked. “I never heard of it.”
“Oh, it goes a little something like this,” Pinkie explained, with the gestures. “’Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.’ Now you try it.”
“All right, I, Fiona, Pinkie Promise to tell Shrek the truth when the time comes,” Fiona promised, performing the moves. “’Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.’”
“Good, now I reckon we all better get some sleep till we figure all this out,” Applejack advised. “But remember Fiona, ya wouldn’t be goin’ tah this weddin’ right now if not for us or Shrek. If Shrek done finds out what happens to you, and you didn’t tell ‘em, he’s goin’ to be miserable for the rest of his life. And that’s the truth.”
With all of that settled, Donkey and the Equestrians proceeded to step outside the windmill and back into the cold night.
“I just know before this is over, I’m gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy,” Donkey mumbled. “Look at my eye twitchin’.”
Fiona peered through the open doorway and watched the group walk away back to the campfire. Her eyes darted down and spotted the sunflower left by the door. Picking it up, she looked around wondering how the flower got here or where it came from. She decided to head back inside, sealing the door behind her, and settle in for the night. As she closed the door, the girls and Donkey were just starting to gather by the fire when Twilight and the others returned.
“Hey guys, how’s Fiona?” Twilight began.
“Um, Twilight darling, can we talk about it tomorrow?” Rarity offered. “It’s been a long night and we’re very tired.”
“Okay…” Twilight sighed, settling down.
Rarity soon turned and spotted Spike making his way down the path far from the comfort of the fire.
“Spikey-wikey, is everything all right?” Rarity asked concerned.
“Not now…” Spike answered, without looking.
Rarity was rather surprised as she watched the teenage dragon storming as far from the windmill and away from the group as possible. The group looked on worriedly as they took their positions around the fire. They hoped for Spike’s well-being as they slowly started to fall asleep.
By now, Spike had hiked as far as he could before taking a seat on a stump in the woods. He sighed heavily, clutching his arms around his shoulders as the cold night air swept over him. Spike struggled to contain his sadness, as he looked up toward the sky and the bright moon hanging overhead.
“He just said that out of a broken heart…” Spike told himself, sniffing. “That’s all it is, and he doesn’t mean anything. It’s not true. I’m a dragon yes, but I do know what love is. I know plenty about it… do I?”
Spike didn’t really expect any answer nor that he cared if anyone would listen. He’d had his self-esteem tested before, and he usually recovered as swiftly as it came. So, how would this be any different? Why should he let what an ogre said affect him knowing that they likely wouldn’t see him again anyway? Why was it that when Shrek said stuff like that… it pained him?
Turned out, someone was sharing his pain. Madelyn Hatter, standing within the shadows of the trees watching Spike as he sat alone on the stump. She took her little hat off her head, as she watched sadly toward the group. Reaching through her hat, she removed what appeared to be a locket of sorts. She opened it, and the locket played music as she gazed at two pictures inside. One was Maddie along with her family in a family portrait, and the other featured her… with all her friends… the ones she was with now… and all the others taken from them during the Red Thronecoming. A rare trace of sadness formed on her own face, as her own tears started to shed for a pain she’d been harboring for a while.
“I went along my merry way, and I never stopped to reason…” Maddie sniffed. “I should’ve known, there’d be a price to pay… someday… someday…”
Very good Mr e
Oh dear, I think Shrek hurt Spike’s feelings. I know he doesn’t mean it, he’s heartbroken.
Wonderful. But it looks like Shrek misheard what Fiona was telling the others, and that led to him saying the last thing Spike ever wants to hear from anyone. And it's only going to get worse come the morning when Fiona leaves and Shrek goes back to his swamp.
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Misunderstanding can do that to someone.
When they don’t know the full conversation it can lead to them saying harsh things to their friends
It’s time for one of the worst cliches in movie history: the third act breakup/misunderstanding
This is one of my least favorite scenes. Huh, I guess that's where I got my misunderstanding frustration from. When one accuses, it tends to set me off.
Funny that how some movies can spark something in you.
Fun Fact: The original script had Princess Fiona born an ogre to the late King and Queen of Duloc. They had her locked in the tower under the lie that she was "of such rare beauty" she was kidnapped. They died, and the kingdom was left under the rule of an ambitious regent (implied to be Farquaad). When she "became of age" to ascend to the throne, she escaped the tower and encountered a witch named Bib Fortuna (a reference to the Star Wars character of the same name) - who narrated the entire sequence through her tarot cards. She gave Fiona a potion which would make her beautiful, but Fortuna warned her of the potion's side effect - she would change between her human and ogress form until she found her true love. Later she was whisked away by her dragon guardian and returned to the tower. This storyline was not adapted to keep the story simple, but is mentioned through the "witch" Fiona tells Donkey about.
Ugh. This is the part where two characters misunderstood the other.
We know how that goes, and how it usually ends. Not mentioning names, Discord.
Discord: (Rolls his eyes) "I wasn't the one who invades other people's rights of privacy and blog about it to ruin lives worldwide."
But seriously. I'm still working on my other assignment and every seconds counts.
It's due in two weeks and I'm only about 60% done.
And WOW! This chapter's 8,000 words long? I'll be staying up all night.
I'll get some of my commentaries up this weekend. Until then, everyone else got this.
Awesome work Lord E and Drama, there's a mystery revolving around Maddie for sure and poor Spike.....that hit hard, hope he recovers, nice laughs here and there, anxious and nervous for what's to come😖
Nice chapter :)
One error is found.
Into this:
Damn Shrek, I know he didn't mean it but that was a very low blow toward Spike there, hoping he gets some much needed love from a certain mail griffon girl after this adventure's over!
Her parents told her and she doesn't remember what the witch who cursed her looked like? Hmmmm........ 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
That sounds like a mystery worth exploring, don't you think? Was it even a witch at all?
Me: Good save.
Sonata Dusk: He's an ogre, and 'ogres like nasty.'
Me: You're catching on.
Me: Not a doctor!
Me: I'm sure he'll be alright...
Me: You tell us.
Me: Of course...
Me: Spike just doesn't know when to shut his mouth about these things...
Me: You're the rediculous ones.
Gabby: Hey!
Me: Hey, sometimes the truth hurts.
Sonata Dusk: Boy do I know it... *reflects on how she knew the truth about her sisters*
Krystal: Boys...
Me: It's true. Take Applejack during applebucking season for example.
Derpy Hooves: Ugh, don't remind us...
*Ponyville residents groan in agreement and they remember what happened that time*
Me: Extra sugar for mine.
Sonata Dusk: Oooooooooh....
Me: ......Oh my~.......
Me: And I'll order the tools for everyone to have smores. *rings the bell*
*Everycreature receives spits, graham crackers, marshmallows and chocolate bars*
Me: Get ready for smores, everycreature~
Sonata Dusk: I could give him one.
Me: Poor poor Maddie...
Me: Classic trope.
Sonata Dusk: *blushing fearsly* What?.....
Me: Oh Pinkie...
Me: Poor Spike...
Me: And disgusting!
*I grab a bucket and vomit into it*
Me: I second that!
Me: *with the group* Really?!
*I reach for the popcorn bucket between Sonata and I not knowing she's reaching as well. Our hooves touch and turn to each other in surprised. We pull our hooves away and turn our heads to the other side blushing, her giving a small smile as well*
Me: The Door Mouse I take it.
Me: *facehooves*
Me: Boy do I know it! I saw those news videos about bed bugs.
*Sonata thinks on this, remember the times she and I did things while I helped her adjust to life in Equestria, sharing the same interests*
Me: *With Twilight and Donkey* An ogre?
Me: Very true.
Me: Boom~
Me: *Feels like that last sentence angered a ceo who released hounds on the one who said it. Yet at the same time, knows Spike is right. Look to Sonata who is still watching, then turns back to the screen*
Sonata Dusk: *hopes Shrek will tell her*
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No need to hurry man. I understand that life must come first. If you need to focus on your other assignments, the you must. I just need you to let me know
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Future G5
Discord Memorial Cinema
Me: Hmm. Nice of them to include another song featured in the film.
Zipp: Weird, yet oddly fitting.
Me: Also, the song from the musical would be a tad…inappropriate.
Pipp: Huh?
Sunny: What do you mean?
Me: It includes a number with the Three Blind Mice…human-sized.
Izzy: Ooh…okay, that makes sense.
Zipp: Not really.
I chuckled at the bit of slapstick.
Pipp: Do you find pain funny?
Me: (french accent) “I find everyone’s pain funny but my own. What can I say? I’m American!”
Pipp: (unsure) It’s…romantic?
Zipp: It’s weird.
Izzy: It’s sweet!
I was laughing like a maniacal German battle medic.
Sunny: It’s…romantic and yet…
Izzy: It’s romantic how they used those animals as balloons! EEH, I love this!
Hitch: (hyperventilating again)
Zipp: You’re gonna give yourself a concussion if you keep this up.
Zipp: Hang on, where’d he come from?
Me: Just a minute, I have a memo on this: (brings out paper and reading glasses) “See Doctor Phantom’s commentary”. Alright, well we missed it anyway, so…
Izzy: Doc’s got a commentary?
Me: Yeah, he’s one of my colleagues.
Sprout: That guy reminds me of that one guy who showed off that Balloon Pack.
Hitch: (huffing) Oh…yeah. I…remember…that.
Pipp: I’m gonna keep this bag for a while now.
Me: (laughing like a madman) Two Disney references in one, haha! Also, he should be dead by now, just like that balloon guy!
Balloon Guy: WHAT?!!!
Zipp: Yeah, uh…that makes sense.
Hitch: That was…weird.
Me: (shrugs) They’ll be fine.
Me: Damn…those two can scat!
Hitch: Scat?
Izzy: Isn’t that cat poop?
Me: Same name, different meanings. “Scat” was a singing style first coined by southern black jazz singers in the early 20th century during the height of the jazz age. Think beat-boxing, except as a precursor.
Alphabittle: Oh, I love scatting.
Haven: Really?
Alphabittle: Yeah; you could say I’m the best.
Haven: I’ll believe it when I hear it.
Zipp: Sure…let’s go with that.
Izzy: (blank) Wow, it’s…almost over.
Sunny: It went by faster than I thought.
Me: He deserved that.
Zipp: That wasn’t funny at all.
Alphabittle: Well, he is an adolescent.
Haven: Oh, yes.
Me: Yep.
Sunny: You’re agreeing with that?
Me: Yeah; I’m not really into that kinda stuff.
Zipp: This is…been a really short movie.
Pipp: Now, wait a minute: I don’t think this is over.
Me: Keep asking yourself that and it may come true.
Sunny: Oh, I hope not!
Hitch: Yeah, Spike deserves better than that.
Me: Truer words have never been spoken before, sheriff.
Sunny: What?
Izzy: Huh?
Zipp: Uh…?
Me: (chuckles)
As did my audience.
Pipp: Aah!
Hitch: That looks painful!
Alphabittle: You’re looking green again, Haven.
Haven: (green) Pass me a drink, please.
Alphabittle: Here, have some milk.
Haven: Thanks. (downs the glass)
Me: I’ll never understand why some people openly talk about their sex life.
Sunny: (cringes) Ugh!
Zipp: Why…did you say it like that?
Me: Why not? I got the point across.
Izzy: Why would they sound like bears if they’re ponies?
Poor mare was given cringy and awkward looks her way.
Hitch: I’ll…tell you about it later.
Me: Does Maretime Bay have a Sex-Ed course?
Hitch: Yeah. It almost got taken down a few months ago.
Pipp: That was around the time that Zephyr Heights started their own Sex-Ed course.
Zipp: Why…are we talking about this?
Me: Because the topic of discussion somehow skewed its way to that.
Me: Awkward yet funny. That’s my kind of humor; when it’s done right, of course.
Pipp: Yeah, it is so easy to mess up something like that.
Me: D’aww!
Zipp: You like this?
Me: Oh, so I can’t like adorable things now?
Zipp: No, no, that’s not what I meant!
Me: Zipp…
Zipp: What?
Me: (sighs) Nevermind.
Zipp: No, no, no; what?
Me: Nevermind!
Izzy: Aww!
Me: What’s eating her?
Zipp: I don’t know.
Me: Huh…hmm…I may have to split this into multiple parts, starting right here.
>>next
cool chapter mate
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Me: *speaking like Big Mac* Nnope!
Me: It's been abandoned for years, what'd you expect?
Me: *bluntly* She's a year older than you.
Sonata Dusk No! Don't eat them!
Sonata Dusk: Wait... is that?...
Me: It is.
Me: *facehooves* Pinkie...
Me: Now she sees it.
Sonata Dusk: *gasps in realization* I see now...
Sonata: Poor Fiona...
Me: *groans* Just like with Fluttershy and the Ponytunes...
Me: You speak the truth, Rarity.
Me: A hard question...
Me: *use my transparent hands to rub Ember's prompt up feet again which she smirks to without my knowing*
Sonata: Oh this is gonna be great~!
Sonata: Oh no...
Me: Oh dear...
Sonata: He didn't really mean that, did he?...
Me: Yeah, especially during a scavenger hunt that added to the difficulty.
Flurry Heart: What does he mean?
Shining Armor: We'll... tell you later.
Me: Not that again...
Sonata: Oh yeah, I see it.
Me: *feels great sympathy for Spike*
Me: Very Good Advice...
Well... To think what damage these misunderstandings can cause. Poor Spike...
Awe man, poor Shrek, I mena he didn't have to screw at Spike for that...but still.
The misunderstanding part...if you ask me I was never too fond kf those. I just think they are a bit too cliche in films and get used all the time, a bit too much
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<<previous
Zipp: Are they seriously rapping?
Izzy: I say: word!
Pipp: Rap is so~ twenty years ago.
Me: Not one of my favorite music genres either.
Sunny: What?!
Hitch: Uh, what?!
Zipp: Where’d that come from?!
Me: Woah, there, Pinkie! I know rap’s famous for some explicit lyrics, but this is a family film!
Posey: Thank you!
Izzy: That could’ve been better.
I sat back with a shit-eating grin on my face as my audience shared the exact same sentiments as those in the movie.
Pipp: How are you not bothered by this?!
Me: I’m an omnivore, remember?
This time I laughed like a French spy, complete with a few snorts.
Hitch: I’m making a note to never feed…any of that stuff to Sparky.
Thankfully, none of my audience took up their offer.
Me: If you’re thinking about asking me if I’d ever eat that stuff: that’s a hard no.
Pipp: (relieved) Oh, thank hoofness.
Me: I’m not entirely uncivilized.
Sunny: Wait, really?
Me: Yeah, they’re a real thing.
Me: Oh, come on, Spike. You’re just exaggerating.
Pipp: (gasps)
Sunny: Is he…?
Pipp: Yes, yes!
Sunny: Come on, you can do it!
Izzy: EEEEEHH!!
Pipp: What?!
Izzy: Awwww…he was right there!
Sunny: He almost had it!
Zipp: I saw that coming.
Hitch: Yeah, me too.
Hitch: Aww, he’s adorable!
Zipp: Yeah, you would say that.
Zipp: Yeah, what’s going on here?
Sunny: I don’t know.
Izzy: Hmm…I don’t think she’s afraid of the dark.
Zipp: You don’t?
Izzy: I think she’s scared of the sunset!
Crickets.
Sunny: Izzy…that was obvious.
Izzy: I used to be afraid of the dark, too!
Sunny: You did?
Izzy: Mmhmm! When I was young, I was told not to go outside at night, otherwise the Ghostlight will get you~! Wait, I’m still scared of the Ghostlight!
Zipp: (confused) The Ghostlight?
Me: Don’t mock the Ghostlight!
Sunny: Wait…you’re scared of the Ghostlight too?
Me: Yep, full nine yards.
Izzy: Ugh, I hate it when they do that!
Zipp: Izzy, bed bugs don’t exist.
Izzy: Then what did I find in my bed three days ago?
Sunny: Izzy, that was a cockroach from the cheese and crackers you left on your bed.
Izzy: That was a cockroach?
Pipp: Mmhmm, I know that look~.
Haven: (disgusted) Oh, that’s…repulsive to think about.
Zipp: Did you…really have to phrase it like that?
Me: What do pheromones smell like?
Sunny: Some kind of perfume, maybe?
Me: Right now, this fairytale is taking a very realistic approach…at least, that’s how I’m seeing it.
Hitch: Yeah, it…is realistic. You don’t see that happening often.
Zipp, Pipp, and Sunny: (with Donkey and Twilight) An ogre?
Me: I’m with Applejack on this one. The window’s closing fast.
Zipp: (sarcasm) Yeah, sure. “Get more firewood.”
Sunny: Yep.
Me: I’m liking this scene. I like how it’s acting as a breather from the fast-paced action from before. It knows that it’s the kind of scene that needs to take its time.
Me: He’s being very realistic about this, even in a fairytale world.
Izzy: Aren’t fairytales…not meant to be…
Me: Yeah, that’s kinda why I’m not a fan.
Me: (breathes in and out) Hoo, boy. Here it comes.
Sunny: Here what comes?
Me: Plot twist.
Izzy: Ooh, I’m sensing something jinxie~!
Zipp: (likewise) Yep.
Me: I, too, am begging! That song is many years overrated!
Sunny: (worried) W-what’s…going on?
A few members of my audience also panicked and screamed.
Me: Oh, goddamnit, Pinkie! Thanks a lot! THIS ISN’T FUNNY, YOU KNOW!!!!
Hitch: EVERYPONY, DO NOT PANIC!! THE SITUATION IS UNDER CONTROL!!
Me: Hey, sheriff? Your whistle’s still attached to your neck.
Hitch: Oh, thank you.
Izzy: (running around) DON’T EAT ME!! I STILL HAVEN'T FINISHED MY PURPOSE IN THIS WORLD!!!
Zipp: CAN EVERYPONY STOP RUNNING OVER ME?!!!
Nearby, I heard the sound of crying foals and a baby dragon.
Tinny: Uh, uh…Red, what do we do?!
Red: (thoughts) You’re a toy, aren’t you?
Tinny: Yeah, but I’ve always ran away from crying kids! Quick, do your thing with the balls!
Red: (thoughts) Okay.
Sprout: HELP ME!!!
Alphabittle: How can you stand the noise?
Haven: You get used to it after a while.
Me: YOU PUT THAT SCALPEL BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM, OR SO HELP ME—!!!
You gotta understand that all these reactions were happening at a rapid pace along with the scene, so that means they were all occurring at the same time. So imagine all of that happening right before Hitch blows his whistle.
As he did, the entire theater audience froze.
Hitch: Can everypony please calm down?! The situation is under control!
Thankfully, every member of the audience returned to their seats, but I was not finished.
Me: I will not tolerate any sort of mass hysteria in my cinema ever again, understand?! If it happens again, I will not hesitate to close down the cinema!
Izzy/Sunny: No!
Me: THEN NEVER AGAIN INSIGHT A PANIC ON MY PROPERTY!!!
There was a silence that followed, which I took to get a drink to calm down.
Hitch: We’re sorry, Plymouth. We promise it will never happen again. (turns to audience) I’m letting you all off with a warning. This is Plymouth’s establishment, and whatever he says goes, understand?
Audience: (sighs) Yes.
Hitch: Good.
Pipp: (gaping)
Zipp: I…did not see that coming.
Izzy: Is…that why she was locked away in a tower?
Sunny: I thought she was locked away just because.
Hitch: “Just because”? What does that even mean?
Sunny: Isn’t that, like, common in fairytales?
Hitch: Still doesn’t make it any less wrong.
Me: Jeez, that’s a bit harsh, don’t you think?
Sunny: That…doesn’t sound right.
Izzy: (gasps) Is she jinxed?!
Me: Since when did Rarity have any concept of heaven? Is she religious now?
Izzy: That…that means she’s jinxed, right?
Me: More like cursed; it basically means the same thing.
Me: I can.
Izzy: Does this creature have holes in her legs?
Me: Yep, and everyone associated with her.
Sunny: That’s horrible!
Me: (drinks) Don’t even get me started on “gaslighting parents.”
Hitch: That’s…uh…
Me: Emotional abuse and manipulation.
Hitch: You’re kidding!
Me: No I’m not! In fact, that word with that definition was coined just a few years ago.
Off to the side, Misty was tightly hugging her little lamp, near on crying.
In my mind, flashes of memories that were not mine danced around in a cruel waltz. They depicted men in the same uniforms lining up people, who were branded with the Star of David. One soldier shot at point blank a young boy who tried to escape, then shot his father who tried to stop the soldier.
So yeah, I can imagine people doing such cruel inhumane acts to children.
Me: Uhh…something about this is way too sketchy.
Zipp: Are you saying this was planned?
Me: Knowing the general basis of fairytales and how easy it is for them to be manipulated: yes.
Me: Okay, so you’re different: big deal!
Pipp: This is serious!
Me: I’m different, and you don’t see me crying over how I can be the same as everyone else! (groans) I’ll never understand why people cry over how different they look. I blame the parents and how they were raised.
Posey: It’s like that mare doesn’t know the meaning of the word “appropriate”.
Pipp: (gasps) Yes!
Sunny: Her and Shrek are perfect together!
Pipp: Yeah, why can’t they be together?
Zipp: Honestly, I’m all for that.
Me: It’s like these people have never even heard of the phrase “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”; its disgusts me how societies live like this.
Me: (groaning) Stupid dramatic irony. Anyway, I’m gonna cut into another part right here, only because I’d run out of space way too quick.
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Me: Not the worst song of the musical, but also not the most memorable either, but it gets the job done.
Sunny: You can do it, Shrek!
Sunny: You can do it, Shrek!
Izzy: We believe in you!
Zipp: Oh, no!
Pipp: Why, oh why did it have to be like this?!
I calmly buried my head in my hands.
There was a long silence.
Me: Yikes, dude.
Sunny: What was that for?!
Izzy: Yeah, what’d Spike ever do to you?!
Hitch: You’re supposed to be his friend!
Zipp: Ugh…I hate these tropes.
Me: You and me both.
Haven: This is all happening a little fast.
Alphabittle: I’m not happy about it either.
Hitch: Spike deserves better than this.
Posey: I find that hard to believe that she managed to keep a secret.
Me: I heard it was a painful experience.
Me: Oh, boy: here we go again.
Me: For the sake of your sanity, I’d keep that promise if I were you.
Sunny: What do you mean?
Me: Let’s just say…Pinkie’s relentless to anyone who’s broken a Pinkie Promise.
Posey: You have got to be kidding me.
Me: True story.
Sunny: Poor Spike.
Me: Love is as powerful as it is cruel.
Me: Okay…that is something I did not expect. Is there some kind of backstory that I’m missing?
Sunny: I hope they’ll all be alright.
Me: Makes me wonder how the next morning’s gonna play out.
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Discord's Theatre, Galaxy Branch
Sunset couldn't help but chuckle at this, same with Postwar:
Postwar: Now that's a classic. *Looks at Han and Leia* I bet the both you had a more similar, yet dangerous situation. Oh, who am I kidding, of course you did. *Were confused* Death Star, Cloud City, Tatooine, ring any bells? *Two of them blushed in embarrasment*
Luke Skywalker: That's nothing, you should've seen Master Yoda's food when I first met him.
Yoda Ghost: Heard that, I have!! *Everyone looks around in shock, minus Postwar, who only smirks*
Postwar texted Arctic about it for just in case it concerns their Fluttershy, but then he couldn't help but laugh when he saw that.
Postwar: Come on, Twilight, you have to admit, it's very funny.
Sunset Shimmer: Then again, she has the worse sense of humor.
Postwar: Meh, fair enough.
Postwar: I would normally say that you're ones to talk, but I'm sitting next to a girl who can use Force Lightning on me, so I don't wanna set her off.
Sunset Shimmer: *smirks whilst looking at him* Smart choice. *Fist bumps Ahsoka*
Kyle Katarn: Take it from me kid, you'll never learn anything about women.
Postwar: *smiling* Ah, the old faking staying behind and spending more time trick. Classic.
Cal Kestis: Speaking from experience?
Postwar: That I do. The other Sunset, or Sparky, did the same thing with me whilst we went camping that one weekend.
Sunset Shimmer: My other me likes camping?
Postwar: Yeah, normally I'm not the camping type, but for her...she's worth it.
Lando: Called it kid, you're right.
Postwar: I'm like, in my early twenties. (Not really, in real life, I'm 32)
Sunset Shimmer: *Looks down in sadness* Wish I could've known that when I was taken.
Galen held her close, to which the two couldn't help but smile.
Postwar: *teasingly* So, when are you two planning to have babies?
Dead silence was with the two of them as they had blank expression, then both of them used Force Lightning and shocked him. he was then singed and blew a puff of smoke:
Postwar: *strained* Okay, I deserve that.
Ahsoka Tano: Whoa, where the heck did that come from?
Kyle Katarn: Has she always been this random?
All: Oh, yeah.
Luke Skywalker: Again, I had worse...
Postwar: *Thinks about older him drinking milk from that creature, ended up gagging about it, which surprised Sunset*
Postwar: Least it's not beetle soup.
Sunset Shimmer: A what?
Cal Kestis: Oh, you take some water...
Galen Marek: Boil it
Postwar: And then put some beetles in it. It was survival 101, how to survive in the harshest environments.
Postwar: Pff, sissies. Back when I was in training, I ate stuff that's a lot worse than that.
Leia Organa: Same for the Rebellion when we first started out.
Ahsoka Tano: Anakin also ate a few disgusting things like that.
Han Solo: Chewie and I had been through the same thing. *Chewbacca growling in agreement*
Sunset Shimmer: I'm curious, did you ever get nervous around my counterpart?
Postwar: At first yeah, though I couldn't explain it, but I felt a spark between us, and I just went with it. I really wanna spend the rest of my life with her.
Ahsoka Tano: What's wrong with her?
Postwar: I expect that we'll find out sooner or later.
Postwar: Not all guys are good at expressing their feelings. I should know, I'm one of them.
Galen Marek: Same here, I didn't know how to feel love before I met Sunset.
Cal Kestis: Same with me.
Han Solo: I know the feeling.
Lando Calrissian: And me.
Postwar: Denial. Another classic.
Leia Organa: Not everyone can express them, no matter how much they wanted to.
Postwar: I know the feeling.
Kyle Katarn: Now this is a good moment.
Han Solo: Though I'm getting the feeling something is going to happen.
Postwar: Oh, I'm sure we'll find out. *Though he had a knowing look on his face, knowing what will happen*
Postwar laughed a bit, as well as the others.
Sunset Shimmer: Why do I get the feeling it's the Grinch all over again?
Postwar: Some worlds tend to do the same as the other. Misunderstandings tend to do that.
Ahsoka Tano: Wait, is that who I think it is?
Kyle Katarn: Glad I'm not the only one who thinks that.
Cal Kestis: Someone did that to her?
Ahsoka Tano: Why would anyone do that?
Postwar: Most fairy tale stories are always twisted. Like Jack and the Beanstalk. Yeah, he took the stuff to help his mother, but he ended up stealing stuff from another guy.
Kyle Katarn: Why would someone want to place a curse on a little girl?
Cal Kestis: Most folks are always twisted.
Postwar: That they are. *Gets a worried look on his face, which Sunset noticed*
Sunset Shimmer: What is it?
Postwar: Uh...you'll soon find out. *Texts to arctic to prepare the Rainbooms for what's to come*
Sunset was shocked by what she had seen. She knew what it was...misinterpretation and misunderstanding. She looked down in shock, whilst Postwar texted to Arctic, and also remind them of the one thing everyone despised the most; Anon-a-miss.
Galen Marek: Sunset?
Postwar: She's...been through this before.
Luke Skywalker: She has? What happened?
Postwar: Well...
One Complicated recap later
Postwar: And that's what happened.
Everyone was surprised to hear this, with Galen holding Sunset close to him.
Leia Organa: I'm so sorry to hear that.
Luke Skywalker: That is why it is dangerous to just jump the gun before asking the serious questions. For deception can be a powerful weapon to use against another.
Ahsoka Tano: Oh, poor Spike.
Postwar: It's always the worst, being caught up in certain web of lies until it's too late.
Postwar: *sighs* This won't end well.
Sunset Shimmer: I...know what you mean.
Postwar looks at her and thought of something, then had an idea.
Postwar: Tell you what, after this is over, why don't you come with me. I know someone who can help.
Sunset Shimmer: Are you sure?
Postwar: I'm sure. One friend's help to another.
Postwar: *sighs* Such is life. Things never work out the way you expect them to. The only way you can is to actually make an effort for it.
Luke Skywalker: Wise words.
Kyle Katarn: I know what that's like.
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Nice job on the comments.
I can definitely tell this one took a while and had a bit of work put into it. I do like seeing scenes play out as normal but with the ponies squicked out by the usual series gross sense of humor, which we are more used to by comparison, of course we're not actually there.
I'm also noting that the whole purpose of the question all was to get everyone out of Shrek's house, which in the end is for the purpose of making him "happy" yet it is at this point that happiness can potentially come from another source that overrides the original way of doing so.
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Canterlot Mall Theater, Discord's Branch
Equestrian Girl Rainbow had a small chuckle from this as she saw this happen.
Arctic: (holding a bit of his laughter) Ah, one of the classic moments. Though, at least this time, there was someone to catch him.
The Equestrian Girls start to feel disgusted with the scene as well.
Pinkie Pie: I-I think i’m gonna to be sick to.
Arctic: (felt his phone buzz seeing the text from Postwar) Anyone need water? (He asked)
Rarity: That would be nice darling.
Arctic: I’ll be back. (He mentioned and looked over to Fluttershy) Hey Fluttershy, mind giving me a hand again.
Fluttershy: Y-Yes, of course. (she said softly feeling a little sick still as she followed him out the theater room)
The other Equestrian Girls watch them leave and turned back to the screen as they tried to settle their stomachs
The girls were shocked by this, seeing what happened to the snake and frog.
Sci-Twi: How many animals are gonna get harmed?! (She said in shock)
Pinkie Pie: Good thing Fluttershy is not here for this again. (The party girl said)
Applejack: Eeyup
Rainbow Dash: Hey! You deserve it, buddy! So don’t go complaining!
Sci-Twi: How long is gonna stay like that though? (She wondered) he won’t be floating forever..right? (She wondered)
Applejack: Well, I’m not too sure, but even if he does, I don’t think anyone will get him down.
Rarity: At least those animals are safe now. (she mentioned and then heard footsteps looking over and saw Arctic and Fluttershy with some water)
Arctic: We’re back. (He mentions and past each Equestrian Girl their water with Fluttershy as they both take their seat)
Rainbow Dash: Thanks. (She said to them both and started drinking a bit of her water)
Fluttershy: You’re welcome. (The shy girl said to her friend as she drinks a bit of her water)
Rarity: They didn’t have to be that detailed about it. (She said rolling his eyes)
Rainbow Dash: Well, they’re not exactly wrong either. (She said hiding a small laugh)
Arctic and Rarity both started to share grin knowing exactly what is going on.
The Girls started to have a red faces as Arctic just groan a bit shaking his head a bit.
The Rainbooms looked at each other with having small smiles on their faces agreeing with what Equestria Fluttershy said.
Arctic: Oook, that might’ve gone too far (he mentioned)
Sci-Twi: Way to much, even for Pinkie
Pinkie Pie: Hey! My pony self has a point. (She protested a bit)
Applejack: Sorry, sugercube. But they’re right (having a bit of red on her cheeks)
The Rainbooms started to feel a bit unease and quickly grabbed their respective waters and started to drink them to settle their stomach’s so that they wouldn’t get sick.
Arctic: Can’t blame him. They’re guys who get nervous around a girl they like. And, have trouble finding the right things to say
Applejack: Speaking from experience? (She asked Ace)
Arctic: (nods slightly) Guess you can say that. (He said to the farm girl)
Rarity: (slightly looked towards Ace and had a small smile knowing who he was referring to) You’ll do just fine darling. Just, gotta believe in yourself and not be nervous when talking to her (she said in her thoughts)
Pinkie Pie: There she goes again.
Fluttershy: I-I really wanna know why she keeps doing that. (The shy girl said)
Arctic: Well, pretty soon it’s gonna be revealed.
Rainbow Dash: Come on Shrek, don’t be in denial about this.
Applejack: Agree. You be better if you just let it out and admit it to her.
Pinkie Pie: There you go Shrek! (She said with a grin)
Rarity: So proud of him that his making his move on Fiona. (She said with a loving smile)
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Canterlot Mall Theater, Discord's Branch
The Rainbowboome eye widens and started to get nervous as Fluttershy started to hide her face a bit into Rainbow shoulder scared.
Sci-Twi: W-Wait..isn’t that (she begins to say)
Arctic: It is, that’s Fiona..this is that she was hiding
Rarity: Who would do something so awful to her! (The fashionista said a bit mad)
Sci-Twi: Someone who probably has a grudge against her family (she said also feeling angered at this) if that’s not the case, then whoever put this curse on her did it for fun.
Applejack: and that just makes it worst. (She said having some anger in her voice to)
Arctic: *felt his phone buzz again and gets another message from Postwar and starts to get worried as he looked over* Girls, you might wanna prepare yourselves (he mentioned to the Rainbooms)
Pinkie Pie: Why’s that Acey? (She questioned)
Arctic:..you’ll see (he said to the party girl softly before looking back at the screen)
The Equestrian Girl smile from the song as they cheered on for him seeing him about to confess to Fiona
There was silence in the theater as the Equestrian Girls witnessed what happened. How Shrek misheard the situation and didn’t know the full conversation between them..a misunderstanding, to which the group minus Sci-Twi shared a knowing look of something similar. A very dark past they all remember.
Arctic: Reminds you all of Anon-a-Miss incident doesn’t it? (He asked looking over and noticing some pain and regretful looks on the Rainbooms face)
Sci-Twi: What’s.. the Anon-A-Miss incident? (She asked when she saw the painful looks on her friend’s faces)
Arctic: (he would then look at the princess counterpart as he took a deep breath and sighed softly) You see..this is what happened.
One Explanation Later
Arctic: And, that’s pretty much it.
Sci-Twi:(she gasped in shocked and looked over to the others) Girls..is this true? (She asked seeing the painful looks on their faces)
Applejack: Even to this day, we feel mighty terrible about it. (she said lowering her hat a bit)
Rarity: Sunset was our friend, and we accused her of it all…
Fluttershy: Without even asking any questions to know if it was her. (She said sadly and held onto Pinkie's arm with the party girl holding her back having a few tears)
Rainbow Dash: We almost ruined our friendship forever, and the whole school turned on her too…and, if we didn’t listen to her, we might not be together to this day.
Sci-Twi: (was both shocked and saddened to hear this from her friends and could see why they don’t bring it up or talk about it)
Arctic: (place one hand on Sci-Twi's shoulder) Don’t be too mad. (He begins to speak) they’ve apologized to Sunset and know what they did is wrong and can’t be erased, it was still good they listened to Sunset's side of the situation. And in the end, they’re still friends (he then looked up to the Rainbooms) Right girls? (He asked them)
Another small silence was in the theater as they nodded, their heads as Pinkie wiped her eyes. Yes, they can’t erase the past, but it was still good they did listen to Sunset, and if they didn’t, they wouldn’t have had the great times they’ve had with each other.
Rarity: Yes, you’re right darling.
Applejack: We made mistakes…
Fluttershy: But, it would’ve been a bigger one not to listen to her that day.
Pinkie Pie: and the most important thing is that we made up and are still friends. And, more importantly, to never jump to conclusions like that again.
Arctic nodded his head, having a small smile as he moved his hand off of Sci-Twi's shoulder, who also had a little smile
Sci-Twi: (thoughts) They’ve made mistakes, but one must make up for them. Friendship is magic (she said with a smile as she looked back at the screen with the others)
Pinkie Pie : Poor Spike..
Rainbow Dash: Little Dude didn’t deserve that. I know Shrek was upset, but still...
Arctic: Anger can do that to people.. makes them say harsh things they don’t mean.
Applejack: I have a feeling things aren’t going to go well.
Fluttershy: I-I hope not, they’re just getting along so well now.
Pinkie Pie: Oh no, now Maddie all sad (she said worriedly)
Arctic: (in his thoughts) I have a really, really bad feeling now. And, it has to do with what Uncle Howdy said when we last saw him.
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I know how spike feels.
Oh, I spotted another error here.
Into this:
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Plymouth – Future G5
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ArcticFox – Equestria Girls
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shadowshion – G4 Assistant (Commentator HQ)
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Postwarmonkey50 – Galaxy Far, Far Away
DEAD BODY REPORTED
*BODY REPORTED (AMONG US) SFX*
i.ytimg.com/vi/fDxrQCBIxI8/maxresdefault.jpg
Me: 😭 "WHYYYYYYYYYYY?!!!! WHY?! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!!! It wasn't even the end of Season 2! Sunset Shimmer isn't even back yet, and...AND OUR FAVORITE HEDGEHOG IS DEAD! SUNSET NEVER GOT TO MEET SONIC, NOR SUPER MARIO!!! WHO DID THIS?!!!" 😡 "It was YOU! Wasn't it, Mr. E?! I ALWAYS KNEW YOU WERE SUS! CONFESS!!!"
(Everyone in the theater – ponies, bronies, magical creatures, etc. – all looked at me, as if I've lost my mind)
Me: "Guys, I know how this looks. But you gotta believe me! I've figured out who the villain's benefactor really is! IT'S DEFINITELY MR. E! The clues were right there in the strange twisted forum posts he's been posting on the Cinematic Adventure! He f-ed with Cruella de Vile! He posted all those weird random forum posts about villains, like the Undertaker, the Fiend, Jonathan Seed, and others doing horrible crimes, as if he was watching them! He SENT the Dazzlings to the Galaxy to ambush Sunset Shimmer and turn her into Fiona Fox so that I would lose my mind later when I get kidnapped by Ray Finkle! HE didn't finish his Once Upon a Time and Game of Thrones stories, because he knew we'd suspect him right away if he had finished his stories, so he left them incomplete! AND! HE! KILLED! SONIC!!!"
APRIL FOOLS!!!
But April Fool comment aside, I still need to work on my other assignment. It's top priority so I'm really sorry, Mr. E.
I'll probably multi-task to work on snippets of my next commentary, as I'm working on my assignment.
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No worries man. I actually thought that April Fools prank was actually kinda funny
Meanwhile, back at Discord’s Theater
The Joke Is On You — Niki Watkins
(0:00)
Discord gives Tempest Shadow the milkshake she had ordered. But Tempest was rather paranoid, having been hit in the face with flying foods and drinks one time too many at Discord’s Theater.
Nevertheless, Discord gave his words that nothing will happen.
Tempest Shadow drinks her shake, which explodes in her face.
Discord proceeds to do a funny dance, mocking in Tempest’s face, before he runs off to continue his pranking spree.
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ArcticFox – Equestria Girls
Arctic was hosting the Cinemas Adventure in the mall’s movie theater in the Equestria Girls world, when the whole movie changes to a video of Uncle Chan quoting, “ONE MORE THING,” on loop.
media.tenor.com/S9jI-GYJ80UAAAAC/uncle-chan-one-more-thing.gif
Discord immediately appears, in his wizard disguise, dancing and mocking at Arctic and the audience, before he disappears in a flash of light.
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shadowshion – G4 Assistant (Commentator HQ)
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HunterBrony – G4 Assistant
Sonata Dusk picked up another taco, and took a bite, when—
*CLANG*
Sonata cracked a tooth, biting on her taco, which she checked to see that there was a bell inside!
Discord soon appeared in front of Sonata, doing the same dance he’s been doing to mock her, Hunter, and shadow’s faces, before he gave each of them a noogie, and ran away.
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Massager – G4 Assistant (Red Highlights)
Discord pranks the guest-stars and Massager by painting them red.
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Postwarmonkey50 – Galaxy Far, Far Away
In the Galaxy, far, far away, Discord had personally invited Juniper Eclipse into the movie theater, and…Juno kisses Galen Marek on the cheeks, which enrages Sunset Shimmer into getting into Juno’s face, demanding to know why the pilot heroine was making a move on the bacon Jedi Sorceress’s man.
The whole confusion was cleared up, when another Galen Marek walks into the theater, carrying a bag of blue puffs and drinks.
There are two — count ‘em — TWO Galen Mareks, and each one’s got Sunset and the other got Juno!
And Discord, dressed as Emperor Palpatine, proceeds to play a violin, as he dances and twerks in Sunset’s face, mocking the fiery girl for letting her eyes trick her again.
Fourth Wall
Me: “Okay, Discord. You’ve had your fun! Now will you knock it off and let me work?”
Discord: “Well, that depends! Which is your work? Your own? Your Game Quest? Here? There? Everywhere? You have WAY too many things to work, all at once. It’s no wonder you have an existential crisis.”
Me: “I blame you, for it.”
Discord: “And proud of it!” 😇
Me: “Just tell me if that’s the last of your pranks, for today.”
Discord: (Taps his fingers together and whistles casually)
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Plymouth – Future G5
In the future, Sunny Starscout and friends were watching the Cinematic Adventure, when—
—Discord jumped through the movie screen, in a DeLorean!
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/bd/DeLorean_Time_Machine_Replica_Kovacs.jpg
Discord honked his horn, blowing every ponies, and baby Sparky, out of their seats.
Discord proceeds to do the same dance he’s been doing, mocking Plymouth and every ponies in the theater, all the way from Equestria’s G4 past.
They call me Mr. Bombastic, tell me fantastic — Mr. Beans
Happy April Fools Day every bronies and Pegasisters!
Discord’s holiday, unfortunately…
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Me: *quickly and calmly use my magic to fix Sonata's tooth*
Sonata Dusk: *smiles with a blush*
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Meanwhile, back in the Future
Me: I just came back from getting a drink!
Zipp: It's official, Plymouth: I hate your boss.
Misty: (stammering) Big...loud...honking noise...
Me: He's not even my boss! And what's with the DeLorean?!
At that moment, the DeLorean disappeared.
Me: Oh, sure. Leave me to clean up the mess that wasn't mine because I own the damn place. And my colleagues wonder why I drink. (drinks)
*My mind is officially burnt out*
What is the matter with me? I’ve lost my senses…I’m losing my hold on reality.
I‘ve become a prisoner. I’m a prisoner between worlds…I’m lost in different dimensions.
I’m being torn apart by my multiple duties. I’m experiencing an imposter syndrome. I don’t know who I am anymore. I am losing my mind!
Just kidding. I’m alright!
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Arctic: (he sighed a bit) Dang it Discord.. (he said in his thoughts with a bit of annoyance, and noticed some annoyed looks on the Rainbooms faces minus Pinkie who was giggling a bit) of course he would have fun on favorite holiday. Just hope everyone else is doing better with his pranks.
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HunterBrony – G4 Assistant
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Plymouth – Future G5
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ArcticFox – Equestria Girls
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shadowshion – G4 Assistant (Commentator HQ)
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Massager – G4 Assistant (Red Highlights)
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Postwarmonkey50 – Galaxy Far, Far Away
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Extra Cut
Wallflower Blush and Juniper Montage were both sitting down, alongside the Dragon, and Medusa, to enjoy themselves a quick lunch, courtesy of the mysterious figure.
Juniper Montage: (Eating from a roasted chicken) “I feel alive again!”
Medusa: (Licking her lips) “Mmmmm. I had forgotten the tasssste of roasted pork, done well.”
Wallflower Blush: (To the mysterious figure) “Hey! Thanks again for sharing your foods. My friends were this close to eating some wild mushrooms.”
????: (To Wallflower) “Oh, it was my pleasure. Though, to be honest, I’m more concerned about your dragon. After a battle with the likes of that centaur demon, and his knights, I wonder how long she could last the journey. That is…IF she can still fly.”
Juniper Montage: “Well, surprisingly, she flew us out of her keep, despite her having tiny wings and all.” (The Dragon growls, threatening Juniper) “I mean no disrespect! No offense! Down girl! Heel, heel!”
Juniper hides behind Wallflower Blush, while the figure walked over to the Dragon, holding their hands out to stroke the Dragon, soothing and calming her.
????: “I see someone has been keeping up her exercise. A very diligent dragon, you are, for guarding the princess.”
In response, the Dragon ended up purring, practically melting into the attention.
Wallflower Blush: (Astonished) “Wow! You have a way with dragons!”
????: (To Wallflower) Thank you! But I owe it all to Cloudjumper for that!”
Wallflower Blush: “Cloudjumper?”
????: “My old and faithful companion.” (Pets the Stormcutter) “He is the reason why I dedicated my life for dragons. And how I have come to learn their ways, to gently educate people everywhere that they aren’t all vicious horrible monsters, but intelligent and gentle creatures whose souls reflected ours.”
The three girls looked at their mysterious new companion in amazement. Her speech has rattled them all with fascination. Though, Medusa herself finds herself relating to the dragons, including the one she and her friends have been traveling with.
Wallflower Blush: “Wow! That’s…That’s…AH!” (Jumps up, startled by a Terrible Terror crawling up her legs) “Whoa! Easy there little guy!”
The mysterious companion walked over to gently pick up the little dragon.
????: (Giggles) “And of course, mischievous.”
Medusa: (To the mysterious figure) “Uh, exxxxcussssse me, but pray tell. Who are you?”
Juniper Montage: “Oh! That’s right! With all the excitement, we forgot to introduce ourselves! I’m Juniper Montage! This is Wallflower Blush! That’s Medusa, but we also call her Maddie. And that’s…the Dragon. We haven’t thought of a name for her yet, and—“
????: “Elizabeth.”
Wallflower Blush, Juniper Montage, and Medusa: “HUH?!!”
????: “Her name is Elizabeth.”
In response, the Dragon — now identified to be Elizabeth — gave a nod in confirmation.
Juniper Montage: “W-W-W-W-What h-h-how did you—“
????: “When you live with dragons as long as I have, you understand their language and all their secrets.”
Wallflower Blush: (Wide eyes) “That is so cool!”
????: “Oh! And my name is Valka.”
Juniper Montage: “Nice to meet you, Valka!”
Valka: “Likewise.”
Wallflower Blush: “So, what are you doing here, Valka? Are you here for Elizabeth? Or are there other dragons here for you to save?”
Valka: “Well, Elizabeth is one of the reasons why I’m here. But, I’m also here on behalf of an acquaintance of mine. She wishes for me to check up on her son.”
Next>>
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*record scratch*
Your plot twists are twisting up my legs...and I love it!
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As we were all laughing Discord garbs a large paint brush and paint as of us red. I ( Massager) noticed first.
Myself: " Huh?"
Fleck: " What the!?"
General Supernova: " Who ever did this is gonna get Cort Marshaled !"
Discord started laughing, so he wants to play dirty then. Zatanna grabs her hat a summoned a rope of scarves to tie him up the I pull out my elder wand to cast the leg locker curse Locamotor Belos which locked his legs as he tried to gain balance then Dodger casts Aquamenta the water charm to push him down.
Finally he had enough and undid the paint
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Elizabeth huh? Well I had no idea. I thought that was just a reference to something. But I think that’s a lovely name for the Dragon.
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Huh, didn’t know Dragon had a actual name.
Learn something new everyday.
Hey Mr. E!
Just letting you know that I’m about 70% done with my other assignment. As soon as I’m done and upload it, then I’ll get straight to work on posting my commentary.
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A 70% is definitely passable in the grading field. Thanks for letting us know.
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AND DONE!!!
I'm done with my assignment. I've polished my scene and I've uploaded the essential files for the initial reviews.
Now I'm free to work on my commentaries, tomorrow.
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We are most pleased to hear the news. Please take as much time as you need to.
“Did I do that?” — Steve Urkel
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Yes! The first english voice of Sonic the Hedgehog!
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HunterBrony – G4 Assistant (Protecting Sonata Dusk)
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Plymouth – Future G5
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ArcticFox – Equestria Girls
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shadowshion – G4 Assistant (Commentator HQ)
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Massager – G4 Assistant (Red Highlights)
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Postwarmonkey50 – Galaxy Far, Far Away
<<Previous
Meanwhile, back at Discord's Theater
Gilda: (To Gabby) “You know all that stuff I said about namby-pamby princesses? I take it all back.”
Garble: “I’m never calling princesses wimps again…”
As for me, well…after seeing plenty of princesses in actions, Princess Fiona is no surprise to me.
Massager and guest-stars reacting.
Me: “Yep. A certain ogre’s got it bad. The L-Word.”
Grubber: “Oh yeah, leprosy.”
Me: “No, Grubber, it's four letters. It starts with "L," ends with "E."
Grubber: “A-ha! Lice!”
Scootaloo: (To Grubber) “No you gluttonous hedgehog!
Smolder: “Huh. Very cheeky.”
Norberta: “Mmm-hmm!”
Me…I can’t help but remember Rain Shine and how much I’d often brush my hands across her back, to feel up her scales.
Massager and guest-stars reacting.
Button Mash: “Look! Up in the sky!”
Rumble: “It’s a bird!”
Chip Cutter: “It’s a horse fly!”
Big Mac: “Nope!”
Sugarbelle: “It’s Donkey.”
Steven Magnet: “Phew! Was that ever close?”
HunterBrony: “Good save!”
Everyone in the theater are all in agreement at the disgusting sight.
Sonata Dusk: He's an ogre, and 'ogres like nasty.'
HunterBrony: You're catching on.
Discord: “Welp. There goes my five stars…”
Me: (To Discord) “…Your theater has five stars?”
Discord: (To me) “Now that’s offensive!”
Massager and guest-stars reacting.
Discord: “Now that’s what I call balloon animals!”
Me: “That’s Kermit’s cousin!”
Dr. Fauna: “Oh, that poor snake…”
Me: "Rain Shine used to shove me like that..."
Massager and guest-stars react.
Me: “No worries, boys and girls. No animals were harmed in the making of this movie! Unfortunately, for the producers, Fluttershy happens to know a very good lawyer. And the animals have filed a lawsuit, against Shrek and Fiona, for animal abuse, to Phoenix Wright, at Wright Anything Agency. But that’s another story...”
Extra Cut
Juniper Montage: (To Wallflower Blush) "Hey Wallflower?"
Wallflower Blush: (To Juniper Montage) "Yeah? What's up, Juniper?"
Juniper Montage: (To Wallflower Blush) "I've been wondering about something...how high can Wingardium Leviosa take you?"
Me: (Quoting Steve Urkel) "Did I do that? Also..." (To Mr. E) "I'M! NOT! A! DOCTOR!!! I'm a brony/Commentator/Animator-In-Training/Writer!"
Random Dude: "AND...the husband to the kirin queen. So that technically makes him a king."
Me: (To Random Dude) "Don't go there, Random Dude..."
Hunterbrony: "I'm sure he'll be alright..."
Massager and guest-stars react.
HunterBrony: (To the animals) "You tell us."
Me: "And...this is the part where they later file a lawsuit against Shrek and Fiona, with Wright Anything Agency."
In her seat, Sonata Dusk was just bopping along to the beat.
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Massager and guest-stars reacting along.
Hunterbrony: "Of course."
Smolder: "She's fine."
Big Mac: "Eeyup."
Romantic audience members: *GASPS*
Romantic audience members: "Awwww..."
Him! It's HIM!
Hunterbrony: "Spike just doesn't know when to shut his mouth about these things..."
Hunterbrony: You're the rediculous ones.
Gabby: Hey!
Hunterbrony: Hey, sometimes the truth hurts.
Sonata Dusk: Boy do I know it... *reflects on how she knew the truth about her sisters*
Krystal: "Boys..."
Silverstream, Smolder, Yona, and Ocellus all agreed along with the blue 16-year old vixen.
Princess Cadence: (Shakes her head in denial) "I don't think so...."
Me: "Spike...for once. Shush."
Cheese Sandwich: "Gee, what gave that away? His long face?" (Laughs out loud at his bad jokes, earning him unamused looks) "...Tough crowd..."
Hunterbrony: It's true. Take Applejack during applebucking season for example.
Derpy Hooves: Ugh, don't remind us...
*Ponyville residents groan in agreement and they remember what happened that time*
Massager and guest-stars reacting to the discussion above.
Me: "Oh yeah. I haven't thought about that Season 1 episode in years." (To Student Six, Krystal, and everyone present) "Long story short: Applejack didn't get any sleep, because she's been bucking apples all night long, and...Ponyville had some terrible disasters to remember."
Hunterbrony: Extra sugar for mine.
Discord: "Don't mind if I do!"
Me: (To Discord) "How many lumps do you want?"
Discord: (To me) "Oh three or four."
And I proceed to whack Discord on the head with a mallet, causing him to sprout 1, 2, 3, 4....5 lumps."
Me: (To Discord) "Oh dear! I gave you one lump too many! I'll fix that." (I gently whacked his extra lump with a small hammer, reducing it down to just four lumps) "And here's a cigar for you!" (I lit a stick of dynamite in Discord's mouth and BOOM!)
Sonata Dusk: Oooooooooh....
Krystal: "Oh my!"
Me: "Ugh!"
Gallus: "Not even Nearly Headless Nick can go that far..."
Massager and guest-stars react.
Hunterbrony: ......Oh my~.......
Me: "Hmmmm."
Everyone all turned to look at a flustered Big Mac and Sugar Belle.
Massager and guest-stars react along.
Big Mac: "STOP LOOKING AT US!!!"
Sonata Dusk: "For realsies! That brings back some unpleasant memories I've once had with my sisters! Y'know, back when Adagio and Aria were my sisters. See, what happened was that there were these two big birds, okay? They were about the size of a mountain! For realsies! I think they're called Thunderbirds. They both got Aria in their beaks. One of them got her tail, and the other got her head halfway down its throat. And Aria's kicking and screaming, okay? And I'm scared, okay? I was like not going anywhere near them."
Massager and guest-stars react.
Me: "Uh, Sonata? Maybe a story for another time, perhaps? You're kinda freaking us out."
Sonata Dusk: "Oh! Sorry!"
Me: (Remembering Rain Shine) "What's one more...night?"
Massager and guest-stars react.
HunterBrony: And I'll order the tools for everyone to have smores. *rings the bell*
*Everycreature receives spits, graham crackers, marshmallows and chocolate bars*
HunterBrony: Get ready for smores, everycreature~
Massager and guest-stars react.
Me: "And...I'll just...sit where me and Rain Shine usually sit..."
Me: (Singing rather downheartedly) "Can you feel...the love...tonight..." (Sniffling)
Sonata Dusk: I could give him one.
Cranky Doodle Donkey: "I think he needs to see Dr. Wolf..."
Massager and guest-stars react.
Everyone in the theater all hugged each other close as they all agreed on every words Fluttershy said.
As for me, well...I'm feeling a little down and...guilty about myself even..."
HunterBrony: Poor poor Maddie...
Discord: (Massaging his head with a lump of coals) "What goes on in that tiny little head of her's anyway?"
Extra Cut
Meanwhile, the mysterious Valka was leading the way, while Wallflower Blush, Juniper Montage, Medusa, and the Dragon named Elizabeth followed close behind the woman.
Wallflower Blush: (To Valka) "Are they much farther now?"
Valka: (To Wallflower) "Not far now?"
Elizabeth was getting rather anxious and was jumping up and down, rather too strong and too hard. She shook the whole ground.
Juniper Montage: (To Elizabeth) "Whoa, whoa! Hey! Take it easy!"
Wallflower Blush: (To Valka) "What's wrong with her? She's acting like we hadn't fed her, or something!"
Valka: (To Wallflower) "She's just anxious to find her sweet Donkey. Y'know, Princess Fiona wasn't the only prisoner inside that castle. Poor Elizabeth has been tasked to stay and guard the princess for just about her whole life. She's only vicious because that's all she knew. She doesn't know any other dragons to befriend with, nor does she know of any other place where dragons live free and happy. In fact, everywhere you look in Duloc, there's hardly any dragons to come by. They've all be fought and slain by brave knights, or Prince Charming, all for the fame and glory of being – what you would call – a hero."
Juniper Montage: (To Valka) "Wow...I...I never thought of it that way before..."
Valka: (To Juniper) "Aye. When you think about it, dragons are seriously misunderstood creatures. They're perhaps the loneliest creatures in this world and the next. Perhaps they're just scary, because they're scared."
Juniper Montage took in Valka's words to heart, then turned to look towards Medusa, who seemed to sympathize with Elizabeth.
Valka: (To Elizabeth) "That Donkey means the whole world to you, isn't he? Not because he swooned you, but because he's the first to have ever talked to you...as if you were just like him. Isn't it?"
In response, Elizabeth nodded in confirmation.
Next>>
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Me: (on the phone) Y'know, Phantom...I heard you've been having a hard time with your wife. I just want you to know that I've got your back and am here to support you. I'm not really familiar with this...situation myself, but the best I can give is that you should talk to each other. Communication is key. Hang in there, and keep going, mate.