Sunset Shimmer is back from the human world. Her friends have all moved on with their lives, now it's time for her to do the same.
After a vacation traveling around Equestria, that is. A welcome back gift from Twilight and Celestia, she's got an unlimited use ticket for the Friendship Express and a link to the royal bank account to cover expenses. She hopes this journey will be her last big adventure before settling down somewhere.
Her next stop is the Frozen North and the Crystal Empire. Looking forward to the next leg of her journey, she certainly doesn't expect her life to change while en route.
This story is just one of the many stops on the Monorail! The event's theme is "trains". For a full list of content, click HERE! This is the 4th stop, but be sure to check out the others!
The previous stop was Girls' Heist Out by Typoglyphic.
You're more than welcome to write your own addition, the only requirement is rail transport as a major plot element or location. Have fun!
(cover art by the talented Plainoasis)
Get this right. You said Cadance had no idea of magic. Now you're saying it's her wings. Make up your mind! You can't do both unless you're saying Cadance was born an earth pony.
Ooh, really loving how well Sunset and Shining are getting along. This feels like a very naturally blossoming relationship and I can't wait to see what happens next.
That was really cute. Really loved the portrayal of the relationships, and how good everyone was at communications. Shining/Cadance/Sunset is a triad that is woefully underexplored, and it's always nice to see more fics tackling it.
Ah. This comes across as disingenuous. Good relationships are rooted in honesty, openness. Hope he turns this around before it blows up in his face.
10099577
Maybe so, but can you say everypony is a prince?
Ponies like Shining value their little moments of privacy, and what what do you know, here's a mare who doesn't know what you are! Anonymity and normal treatment! He probably hasn't had that in forever.
In fact, Cadance will probably sympathize with him. She might even envy the chance – or, looking at where Sunset's thoughts are going, make fun of him
Not saying you're wrong, exactly, but he has his reasons, and if Cadance understands, no harm.
(Well, except for Sunset being embarrassed, but that's entertainment for you.)
10099577
10099807
Ok so yeah, him being vague about it is intentional, but not for either of the reasons you are thinking of. Yes normal treatment is nice for somepony in the public eye as much as Shining Armor, and yes honesty is important especially when it's about how he's married and who the princess is.
But Shining was likely a guard trainee during Sunset's original education under Celestia. So he undoubtedly knew who she was once he remembered. But more importantly, he knew about the rift between Sunset and Cadence, both from witnessing it himself and probably talking about it with his wife. So he would understand the need for some... discretion.
Is it underhanded to practically lure Sunset to the palace so her and Cadence can work things out? Yes. But can you blame him for trying?
Good job with this story! Sunset and Shining's connection developed in a realistic way, and there was a lot of good dialogue. Of the two endings, I prefer the poly end, since it better pays off what was being set up and pony cuddling is good, but there were nice moments unique to the friendship end.
The story could have used an editing pass, however (now mostly fixed), and some aspects of the story felt off. First there's the entire thing with Shining Armor hiding Cadance's name in an unnatural way, which Sunset never picked up on. Then there's Sunset not realizing Shining Armor and Cadance were married and Cadance was ruling the Crystal Empire, despite being friends with Flurry Heart. Shining tricking Sunset into meeting Cadance also didn't seem right; I would have preferred Sunset having some choice in the matter. Shining talking Sunset into meeting with Cadance also would have helped emphasize their relationship, which largely got downplayed in the third chapter.
Despite these flaws, I think you did a great job making this relationship work.
I actually quite enjoyed both epilogues... Epilogi? Epilogia? Epilogae? Annnywho, both were really nice.
Sunset, adorable cuddle-floof to the royal family, or Sunset, adorable aunt to Flurry and general nerd.
What a decision. I like cuddle-floofs, personally, but both work really well.
Sooo... should you just *happen* to get some free time...
Pleasepleaseplease write more of this O Glorious Bug of Literature. plz. Do it for the feels!
(In all seriousness, great job with this. Your author bio, much like the Cake, is a lie.)
Very nice. Would love to see a continuation at some point.
I really liked the story. Might be able to use a little light editorial polish - I kept tripping over tense changes, misspellings, and punctuation flubs here and there.
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10100382
I am so happy you liked it, I really enjoyed writing it! And I would be lying if I said there weren't any other plans for this, the idea has been cooking for a long while. This writing event was just the perfect opportunity to write it out.
It was originally a subplot in an adventure long-fic I want to write someday. The outline for it is pretty much done, but writing it out is a whole other monster. And I have two projects in progress already, and I really should devote more time to them. That doesn't mean I won't write a quick one-shot continuation of this some day, but it's not high on my to-do list as of the moment.
However, that could change if enough people express interest in it. I am more motivated to write something when I'm not the only one who's excited about it.
Shiny seriously needs to mention that he's married. XD
10099446
Cadance origin story places her as a pegasus first. She ascended purely by chance when she stopped a misguided pony who'd been using dark magic. Cadance suddenly found herself an alicorn with all the magic that goes with it and no idea how to use that magic. Ergo the statement she got her magic by accident is true to canon. She had been a pegasus and knew nothing of magic. Ponies being nice to her for no other reason then she was a new pretty princess is human nature.
10101586
I know Cadance's backstory. All I'm saying is the story isn't being consistent with hers here.
My only real complaint is that all this, this ending that is, came too fast. I would have loved to see some romance going on in between this and the previous chapter. Keep us guessing for a while. Will they form a heard or not?
i.imgur.com/AAwjGjM.jpg
10101599
It seems consistent enough to me.
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10101614
I fixed it shortly after posting, after it was mentioned by a few people.
10101617
Ah. Then ignore my recent comment. Nice to see the fix.
"the reagent of the Crystal Empire" is a very amusing typo for "regent"!
This is great. I like the sweet, simple exploration of Sunset coming back to Equestria and reconciling with some of the differences since she left. The romance certainly could have done with another chapter or two, and Sunset and Cadance's meeting was a little blunt, but otherwise a really smooth take on Sunset's potential place in Equestria post-EQG.
Excellent story.
I think I like this ending a bit more, mainly cos I am shipping trash but it was so heartwarming. Great fic and great work all together.
Though I gotta ask, did them three of them sleep together/bang while flurry was in the room. That seems a bit, inappropriate. Even if there only just snuggling together it feels a little off to me
10513765
More like they moved as a group up to the royal suite, laughing and having a good time. The large bed was the natural comfy place to occupy.
Flurry tired out earlier than the rest, but moved to the couch from the bed as a last ditch effort to stay awake. It prolonged the inevitable for about 20 minutes before she passed out.
The rest of them lasted only about an hour longer before they fell asleep too.
Rest assured, no lewdery happened during the time frame of the fic.
I'm glad you liked it!!
10514115
Thanks for clearing that up. Even without lewdness waking up to see your parents snuggling with an extra member would probably quite the shock
10514179
That's a fair point. Probably one more event on the long list of embarrassing things Flurry has seen her parents do.
If I ever write a followup/sequel, Flurry's reaction would likely be included.
10514595
Haha nice
Also that could be fun, see how the Empire reacts to the royal couple having a girlfriend lol
I enjoyed this story. Good job!
Poly ending was cute but honestly the wholesomeness of the just friendsilogue is incredible. So the union of the two endings has filled me with fuzzy feelings and gratefulness that you wrote this. Excellent words <3
10547446
hhhhhhhhhh
Thanks you!
I would have liked it a bit longer, with Cadance and Sunset, (Flurry too) interacting a bit more after Sunnys big breakthrough with her. I can understand why though, with the two different epilogues. I really liked the ending, either one really, if anyone can help get her over Shining it's the Princess of Love. (As in maybe help find another.)
10514595
I would love to see a sequel of this! I could imagine thinking Sunset would be uncomfortable at first, due to being in human world so long, humans are usually monogamous, but ponies (least my head-cannon) polyamory is semi-common. :) Wonder if Flurry would refer to Sunset still as Auntie or mommy, she'd be so excited, its clear she really cares about her. Sunset in her head wondering how she'll explain it, but the parents just go with the flow, and Flurry loves the idea.
(Reading this as I wait in Union Station DC for my train)
This story gave me a big smile, I love seeing Sunset getting to be happy and this does that well.
This was really cute! I really enjoyed the dynamics between everyone but it didn't quite gel for me for similar reasons that other commenters have said.
The fact Sunset never cottoned onto things felt off, the speed with which things were wrapped up felt kinda rushed. The fact she knew Flurry but not her parentage or Shining.
Still a cute story but I would've definitely liked a bit more time to breathe in between the beats.
11678357
Yeah I get it, and I agree! Honestly, I made the mistake of using an idea that I had too much content planned for, then trimmed out way too much in order to meet the deadline.
The train ride was supposed to be much longer, allowing more time for the relationship to really develope. The arrival at the palace was going to be longer, more time for Sunset to put together the pieces about his role there, as well as expanding on her and Flurry's adorable friendship.
And how rushed this was kinda killed my enthusiasm for a sequel. I'd want to remake this first, the right way, before moving on in-universe.
11678394
I can definitely understand that. I do think it's still a solid fic, and if you ever rewrite it, I'd love to read it n_n
11678415
Thankya muchly! Which ending did you like more?
11678431
Oh man, I gotta go with the polyship. Friendship is nice but I love me some polyamoury (irl and with technicolour equines) n_n Plus I've always kinda headcanoned that Shining and Cadence would be open like that so this just slotted in so neatly hahaha.