This is an alternate telling of the episode "Putting Your Hoof Down". With her friends stressing that she needs to stop being such a pushover, Fluttershy agrees to attend an assertiveness seminar hosted by a minotaur named Iron Will. Unfortunately, it works a little too well...
Like my previous story, this fanfic is my attempt to write a better version of this episode. First off, the ENTIRE Mane Six appears in this version rather than just half of them. I also tried to make Iron Will more villainous, which I think was lacking in the actual episode.
However, I mean no disrespect to the people responsible for the show, nor do I claim ownership of My Little Pony. This fanfic is purely for fun, and is simply my opinion.
Chapters (1)
To be honest, Iron Will didn't feel that villainous. Fluttershy took the seminar and then didn't like how she turned out. It's not really his fault.
Not bad, though to be honest I feel like only Rainbow Dash had a role to play besides the ones already included.
9808066 Not to mention he was well within his rights to demand payment for his seminars. And yet even though he could've made any demands he wanted, he accepted Fluttershy's no and went away.
9808102
Feels like Fluttershy was more mean that Iron Will.. Guy was just doin' his job to live.
So are you going to make alternate versions of all the mlp fim series or just some of them?
9808102
I just thought that this episode would've been better if everypony appeared. Do you think it improves the story at all?
9808414
There are several episodes that I hope to do. I plan on doing Ponyville Confidential some time soon.
9808066
I tried to make him more of a jerk by having him not care that his techniques were causing Fluttershy to become violent, and refusing to listen to her friends.
9809395
ok and anything else?
9809395 Applejack and Twilight don't really contribute anything extra. Rainbow Dash though, I think you had a good role for her.
9809525
Thanks about Rainbow Dash, and as for Twilight and Applejack, I just thought it would be good to have the entire Mane Six present for this episode.
9809471
I think the episode "Dragon Quest" could use a rewrite.
9809550
Right...what about Luna Eclipsed? Do you think that episode need a rework?
9809614
Possibly.
9809749
Ok
Sure looks better then what the original episode did.
Also, nice reference to Disney Pocahontas where Dash says a similar line John Smith says.
9819362
That's EXACTLY what I was thinking of! Great job on catching that!
You know you're using your feminine charms to manipulate that stallion into giving up something he just bought, and probably needed? That's not very 'generous' of you, and manipulation of others is inherently shady at best. You should really stop doing that before you cross the ethical boundary more than you already have, Rarity; definitely not a good reputation to have, being a manipulator of stallions.
9827301
You know that part actually happened in the show right?
*claps hooves slowly* You are the writer we've waited for, for almost nine years.
9838014
What difference does that make?
Pretty good alternate take on this episode.
I'll admit, it's not one I'm fond of revisiting, mostly for Angel being at his worst, and everypony in Ponyville seeming to have taken Jerk Pills for how they treated Fluttershy. I know it was necessary to make the story possible, but it just felt like too much, when seemingly everypony feels like Fluttershy can be treated like a pushover with no repercussions. It's interesting to have the rest of the Mane 6 here in this version, since the absence of everypony else except Pinkie and Rarity, plus Fluttershy never seeming to think to use the Stare to put Angel in line before the end, leads one to believe that this was actually before they'd all met Twilight. I do like the twist of it being Dash pushing her buttons that makes her realize she's gone too far, and the 'seeing the true monster in her reflection' from the original episode is from Dash's own experience this time. Clever.
Making Iron Will more outright aggressive and rude is another interesting take. I always wondered why he was treated like an antagonist in promotional work when, at most, he was over-enthusiastic about his teachings and a bit opportunistic about gaining new students. Him rebuffing the rest of the Mane 6 the way he did makes the 'monster' title a bit more appropriate for him.
All in all, an interesting alternate take. Good job. =)
10605144
Thanks a lot. But do you have any suggestions on how this episode could've been done differently? What would you have done? I'd just like to know because I feel like I could've done more with this story.
10608428
Hard to say. The only reason Fluttershy wanted to become more assertive was because everypony treated her like a doormat, and to make that happen, they were all unnecessarily rude to her, like driving the price up on a single cherry because she really wanted it, or punting her to the back of the crowd at Iron Will's seminar. It's hard to know how to make the episode work the way it does without giving her the need to want to be more assertive.
10608965
True.
To be honest, I think this is my least favorite episode in the whole series. But I like your vision much better, Also I don't angel
Say, that story was quite an improvement with respect to the canonical version! What a way to include the rest of the Mane Six!
I mean Iron Will really wasn't a villain he was a motivational speaker and life coach it's not his fault Fluttershy took his suggestions too far. Fluttershy lacked the ability to take a situation into consideration and see if apply of a more aggressive attitude was needed.