At the bottom of Stable 10, the great generator that has kept its residents alive for centuries is beginning to fail. As solutions are sought within, one pegasus sets her sights on the very ponies who built - and possibly sabotaged - her home.
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Did Ginger ever cover up her cutie mark again? I don't remember if she did, and I don't think a cutie mark like that would go un-noticed or be well-received.
RIP Gallus and bugwaifu. :c
Nice to see Aurora & Frenz getting a little R&R, at least. They need it. Hope they don't have to shank Julip at some point. Still very curious as to what exactly happened with Ginger's magic...and whether it's 'contagious'.
It's pretty hypocritical that Spitfire is1 livid about Dash not trusting her, when she's wasn't particularly willing to start from a place of trust either. When there's no trust for the Element of Loyalty, you know things are pretty doomed. She should also know better—that operational security could mean that even she might be out of the loop sometimes. This is her ego messing things up for everyone...which generalizes to a good summary of all eras in Fo:E, I suppose.
The point about having no warning about the bombs is interesting. We do tend to assume there will be forewarning, a slippery slope down to the big red button, but there have been cases where simple oversights took us to the edge for no good reason. Not hard to imagine that a simple failure of procedure could have ended it...or also that a single malicious actor or small conspiracy could manage it.
Of course, since Equestria seems like the far less rational actor here, I have to wonder if it was something insane like ol' Tia and/or Lulu deciding they'd had it with the mortals and their progress and solar power and just pushed the button to be done with it. Hell, [puts on tinfoil hat] that whole "Canterlot got blow'd up" thing could have been just for show! Smoke and mirrors! They teleported Canterlot away and have been hiding on the dark side of the Moon the whole time! THE SISTERS LIVE! THEY SHALL DESCEND UPON US, AND THEIR RIGHTEOUS FURY SHALL CLEANSE THE LAND OF ALL MORTAL FILTH! REJOICE, AND EMBRACE THE FIRE!!!!!
*cough* ...
.
10155915
Nope, she hasn't covered it since leaving Thunder Bluff.
10155951
Huh. So why has nopony commented on it? Is it normal in some way?
10155932
;p I thought it might be worth giving them a respite from the insanity they've been going through, plus I've been waiting for a while to roll out Kiln and the implications of a community created by ghouls who still wanted something close to the standard of living some of them had enjoyed prior to the bombs falling.
I had a good bit of fun with Gallus and Cicada's scene. Brevity isn't always my strong suit in writing and creating that very short mini-arc was good practice, plus I wanted to draw in one of the "creature" characters from the later series. Gallus seemed like a good fit for that scene. :)
Regarding the lack of warning, I might need to swing back and try to clarify that better. There were warnings in the sense that a missile launch was detected and civil-defense style alerts went out to the Equestrian public, or else... well, you'd have a ton of empty Stables that never had a chance to be populated. There was no warning in the sense that there was no clear or obvious ramp-up in hostilities that would have indicated an imminent strike. No Cuban Missile-style event to point to, in a sense. Let me know if that wasn't communicated clearly and I'll make a point to try and polish it up a bit!
10155967
Thus far they've traveled through Blinder's Bluff and Kiln with her mark visible, though Ginger's time spent at the Bluff was brief and they've only just arrived in Kiln. That said, you're definitely picking up a thread that will be woven into Chapter 19, which is already in progress. Kiln is the first community they've visited with Ginger's mark plainly visible, and one that is predominantly occupied by ghouls who can still remember a time when slavery wasn't just an unpleasant norm of the current year, but an abhorrent concept altogether. All I can say is that if there's ever a place Ginger will take some heat for her cutie mark, it's going to be there.
10155995
I can't wait. And by "I can't wait", I mean I have to wait. So, yeah.
...
Here, have a pretty Enclave Pony:
derpicdn.net/img/2014/4/22/607461/large.png
10156012
Silly Enclave pony, muds don't have opinions!
10155981
No, no, that's exactly what I got from 'no warning'.
10156340
Oh good! I may be operating on three hours' sleep, haha.
10155220
:)
I think the work paid off, yes. :)
Though, redemptive arc? For whom?
Also, "geab"? I don't recall encountering that term before, and the dictionary I pulled up didn't help.
Ah, thanks. :)
10155240
My main FoE headcanon also had Equestria as the aggressor, and prior to/without including the version in Project Horizons, the Pink Cloud release at Littlehorn as a tragic accident. (Basically, would-be defector in which refugees smuggling Pink Cloud device to Equestria, school's defenses are turned on the refugees for bad reasons, defector's family gets killed, and they're understandably rather upset and don't see themselves as having anything in particular to live for now.)
Somber commented, as I recall, that my explanation for the Littlehorn massacre was the first good one he'd heard from someone else, but by the time it came up he'd already thought of his own and built it into the story.
The Pax Roamana did launch first, but if the end of the war isn't included (and possibly even if it is), they quite possibly have a stronger claim to being the "good guys" in that headcanon's war, if there were any; I think at least it wasn't starkly clear one way or the other.
(The "defensive" zebra megaspell system was actually built as primarily a first strike weapon from the start, but they really hoped they'd not have to use it. When they finally determined that their loss in the war was inevitable, they first tried throwing everything conventional they could at Equestria's forces in a desperate final assault... and when that failed, up went the missiles. It can be argued that, in so doing, they won, in that they did achieve their war goal of not being conquered by Equestria, while Equestria did not achieve its of conquering them, and there were still viable groups of survivors scattered across their lands. As to whether it would have been better for both sides if the zebras had responded to expected otherwise-unstoppable defeat by surrendering instead of breaking C.A.R.E.? Well... that's debatable, in a good way from this side of the screen, I think (certainly, some friends and I had fun playing around with ideas in this shared headcanon we were developing, though not limited to this (I'm not sure how much that particular question came up, actually; this was years ago.)). On the one hand, Equestria and the Pax Roamana would both have been left at least as physically intact as the conventional war had left them by that point, and millions would have still been alive. On the other... late-stage Equestria was not the nicest of places for its own citizens. For the people its war machine was pointed at? Who propaganda had made the Evil Striped Menace, scheming, sneaking, stealing, and superstitious? Also, sitting on large quantities of natural resources? The end of what the world had become by that point wasn't without positives.)
Of course, in a somewhat similar vein of looking at the zebra side of things, and connecting to the above, there's Homelands.
...Also, I don't know why your comment there was downvoted.
...Right, that reply got longer than I expected, old headcanon I don't often get opportunities to talk about these days, but I should still have time for the next chapter! Onward! :D
(Oh, and of course, I'm still enjoying your even more different version of events too. :))
I wonder who Spitfire's "he", of the "gym" note, was?
"a magic-devouring minotaur"
Is that a typo, a difference in the universe, or in-universe incorrect history?
"mid flight in night and shadow. She"
Was that supposed to be "light"? Or is there a reason they put Celestia in darkness too?
...I wonder what exactly about Pastor Rivers Julep knows?
"something like this should be handled by"
"something like this be handled by"?
"the mare who stood at the helm since the days when balefire poured into the sky"
Well, now isn't that interesting...
Her reaction to Jet Streak not just from having been thinking about the details of Julip's captivity, then, I'm guessing.
(Oh, and "mare who'd stood"?)
Ah, looks like I'd gotten a bit confused at the end of the previous chapter; I'd thought Aurora'd flown them all the way across and the spritebot was back on the side they'd come from, but, looking back, the text does seem quite compatible with her own flying them past the worst bits at the bottom. That explains the photograph from earlier in this chapter, too. Not sure how much of the misinterpretation was on me, sorry.
"Wound too deep and too"
"Wounds too deep and too"?
"the neatly space writing painted"
"the neatly spaced writing painted"?
"Lead the first shift"
"Led the first shift" or "Lead of the first shift"?
"a matching pair to the doors waiting for them across the bar’s front boardwalk"
I can't seem to figure out what this refers to, sorry.
...Oh! Wait, is it that the doors strategically placed in the painting are themselves painted on, and the sign is over the actual doors? I'd read it as the actual doors forming a part of the sign.
...Ah, the next paragraph does seem to lend weight to that. Though, also, the next paragraph gives a location as "beneath the lights", but where are the lights on the sign? I can guess from that that they're likely a string running in a line or arc across the sign, but it feels like I'm doing that backwards? And it still isn't that clear an image, just guessing. Did something get lost between revisions here?
...Also, bit of an issue picturing the inside: Is the door off-center? It sounds like there's a lot more to the right of it than to the left.
"Autumn watched her lean forward"
"Aurora watched her lean forward"?
"enjoying her a bit"
"enjoying hers a bit"?
"seem to phase him any more than"
"seem to faze him any more than"?
"She was just grateful she wouldn’t have to taste the worn bite trigger screwed to the side of her weapon. Hayflinger had attached it to the left side of the stock as camouflage, leaving the trigger assembly intact and available for her to use on the opposite side."
I don't recall: has the story mentioned yet what the mechanism this universe's pegasi use to fire their guns while flying?
Ahh, and there's confirmation that the Glowing Gash's sign is on the second floor.
"the five ministry mares"
Interesting...
"one of the pillars that seemed to draw an invisible line between bar space and table space"
...Oh! Were those three heavy square timbers vertical, rather than horizontal on the ceiling? I'd imagined them as purlins under a gabled roof (I'd not been imagining the second floor Julip mentioned either, though I'm still not sure if that's not just her mistaking the false front for a second floor wall.).
"Cicada’s head jerked to the side as something punched hard into her neck."
Yeeeeeeah, I was waiting to see if something was about to go horribly wrong, or if perhaps you were just trying to put us in that tension and then the twist is that it goes fine. Looks like the first...
"Some were even known to whisper desires for the Wonderbolts to fly north to the Crystal Empire and tear it down too. These days, there was little love for the so-called Princess of Love. Not after she and her husband turned their backs on Equestria.
If that ever happened, Barley would pull every string she had to get assigned to that mission."
My that's a lot packed into just a few lines. :D
Whew! Good! But long! But also good! Oh dear, I need to be getting to bed. :D
Thanks for writing, though!
10157353
Holy wow, lot to unpack here! I'm not really great with quoting individual lines so I'll kinda give the Cliffnotes answers as best I can to clarify the important bits?
> I'll go through the chapter today and clean up the typos you cited, thanks for pointing those out!
> FoE headcanons are definitely unique to every individual fan, and I really love the creativity that comes from readers and writers that invest so much thought into these worlds. That's a large part of why I chose to keep Renewal independent and separate of the existing fics, especially the larger "main" ones. They make a point to explore as much as their world as they could during their runs which leaves a lot of implicit rules to follow if you're building inside them, or even referencing events those authors designed. It was much easier for me to give myself permission to create something brand new. Still, huge kudos to those authors that set the groundwork that I'm standing on.
> Thus far I've only read Kkat's original FoE to completion, a small amount of Project Horizons and a little bit of the one featuring the pink-mist-filly. I think I overdosed on the original which is why approaching another mountain was too daunting for me. I'll have to go back someday and give them their fair shake, but a lot of the references to them go over my head. :)
> The signage outside of the Glowing Gash used green-painted doors affixed directly to the signage itself to simulate Rarity's nether bits, and a duplicate set were used as the bar's main entrance. Sorry if that was confusing, I can always look at clearing that up in later revisions if it becomes a repeated issue. :)
> The pillars inside the bar run down the center line, dividing the space into equal parts. Main bar area is on the left, tables are on the right. The doors are centered, but I'm not sure if explaining that in great detail is terribly important to the narrative.
> Gallus' and Cicada's scene was a treat to write, partly because it gave me an opportunity to practice writing a relative short character arc in the space of one scene, and partly because it gives everyone a window into the lives of two characters who are planning their lives beyond the war. Bonus for being able to establish that changelings have emigrated beyond the borders of Equestria in search for a life of their own, and not all of them were comfortable enough to reveal their true selves.
10157353
There we go, got those typos all fixed up. Thanks for pointing them out :)
One thing that I forgot to mention before is that I quite enjoyed the characters of Julip and Primrose. I know we will read more of Julip, but will Primrose make a return? I mean, besides just being in the background, are we going to learn more about her personality, family, backstory et cetera?
10157521
Hey, you wrote a lot first. :D
re FoE headcanons:
Well, I'm enjoying your version too, as I believe I may have mentioned. :)
re other stories:
Fair enough; PH isn't exactly small. :D
(I never finished Pink Eyes, myself.)
re the signage:
Ah, thanks. :)
re the pillars:
Ah, thanks. Hm. Is the bar side just a lot lower-density, then? Or am I missing something?
re Gallus and Cicada's scene:
I think it went well. :)
"Bonus for being able to establish that changelings have emigrated beyond the borders of Equestria in search for a life of their own"
...Except that I didn't get that out of it. I mean, that changelings are outside Equestria, sure, and Cicada did indeed seem to genuinely love Gallus, but we don't know why she was out there. I don't think we actually even know in this universe whether Chrysalis's hive was the only one; Cicada might well have been from a completely different, Vhannan hive, and the sort of thing she did with Gallus is just their standard practice.
Sorry.
Oh, and any particular reason you didn't address my questions on the previous chapter in that comment (at the top)? Just how much else was in there?
10158309
Thanks and thanks. :)
Oh, and I notice that Tirek is still identified as a minotaur? Interesting.
10158925
How did I not notice that? Tirek is a centaur, people!
10158686
Ooh, you in fact will be seeing a bit more Primrose! I can't say when or in what context, spoilers and all, but yes, she will be appearing in the future. :)
10158814
I think a lot of folks will have different reactions and theories regarding Cicada's presence outside Equestria. Since she's not critical to anything that could spoil the story, I will say that at least in my head, she's in the same category as Roach. She had a moment of clarity and chose to leave the hive behind. In her case, she traveled beyond Equestria and out to Vhanna to start a new life. Kind of a picking up stakes and heading to the frontier sort of thing. Dunno, she was a fun character to be sure. I might go back and write her into something smaller someday.
I'm not sure what question you're referring to that I missed? Can you quote it?
10158971
Whoops! Let me swing in there and fix that, I'm getting my mythological beasts mythed up.
10159012
Ah, thanks. Takes a bit of the mystery out, but then, the mystery not actually about her is still as intact as before we met her. :D
(edit:
Oh, though I do now notice you say "at least in my head". :)
(Sorry, in a hurry.))
Oh:
"Though, redemptive arc? For whom?
Also, "geab"? I don't recall encountering that term before, and the dictionary I pulled up didn't help."
In this comment: 10157353
10159014
Ahh, did you just miss me pointing that out, then?
10158971
(replying at the end due to the above)
Thanks, then, platogkrone!
10159021
Oh, I wasn't sure what you were referring to there beyond the typo is all. I suppose "redemptive" wasn't the right word for it? I didn't like the idea of Windy living out the last years of her life alone with nothing but grief, so having her discover some happiness in adoption seemed like a good direction to take. Fallout as a genre can get unbearably grim, sometimes at the risk of lessening the impact of some otherwise powerful moments.
10159032
Ah, thanks. And yes, I think it was well done there. :)
And "geab" was a typo, then?
10159076
Yep, I meant to write "grab."
10159095
Ah, thanks. :)
Wow, you really have me hyped for the next chapter. It doesn't help that I find enclave pegasus mares to be the most endearing protagonists.
10168919
I tend to agree! There's so much potential for characters coming in from the "bad guys," and I love it when a story can explore them with some real care. Hoping I can measure up to that with Julip :)
10168983
You've certainly made her more likable than any of the steel rangers, though I admit I am biased in that regard. And despite the minor genocide (please don't quote that out of context) the current enclave leadership seems quite reasonable, probably because of their bias.
10169070
That's the thing I like about antagonists. Nobody does things because they really love evil. Every sin has a rationale to guide it. ;)
Great updates!
10180831
Thank you!
Doris Day... I can't thank you enough for giving me the pleasure to hear her. Never knew about her, and yet I can't seem to stop listening to her music. Thank you!
Oh, and I guess the story is good too, yeah. (Jk, I absolutely love it)
10212487
Hah, well I'm glad you enjoyed something about it.
I'll be honest, I had that song stuck in my head for a good week after writing this chapter. Holy farts.
You made the Enclave eugenicists.
The original Enclave was bad enough. You went full Maximum Evil.
11649727
It's crazy what folks will justify in the name of religion ;p
11649989
Yet more evidence to support my stance that religion is the invention of the mad.
Their comeuppance had better be swift, certain, and legendary.
11649999
I have something planned along those lines
I do gotta say I really liked the original story of the pink cloud for Canterlot, having read it before I even played Sierra Madre DLC it was just so damn mystifying.
Before I forget, I always envisioned radiation in FoE to not be the same gamma rays we think of for radiation. Since the whole concept of megaspells and whatnot. I do understand this is an AU of course.